A Snowflake Wish

by Renee Harless

  As the last word poured from her lips, she felt Deckard’s hand touch her cheek to wipe away her sadness. January was embarrassed by her reaction to the song, but it was too late to make excuses now. Her eyes opened and she took in the tree-lined landscape before them.

  “Look at me,” Deckard demanded in a quiet confidence. Her head turned toward him, but she couldn’t bring her eyes to meet his. “Look at me, beautiful.” January heard the sadness flitting through his gravelly voice and she drew her eyes up to meet his. He said with a sullen smile, “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize how hard that may have been for you.”

  Shaking her head, January tried to toss aside her sudden sadness, replacing it with a small smile. “I’m fine. Honestly. I think it just got to me that I’ll never get to hear the song again.”

  Deckard opened his mouth wanting to say more, but a knock on January’s window brought their attention to Samantha, waiting anxiously outside rocking back and forth in her designer boots.

  The handle felt cold under her hand as January reached to open the door, but she stopped when she feels Deckard’s grip on her arm.

  “Hey, I know that this may be your last Christmas, but we’re going to make it the best one. Trust me.”

  And she did. She knew that he felt the same undeniable pull toward her that she felt toward him, despite knowing each other for a couple of days. Sometimes you just knew right off the bat that you could trust someone. She felt that way about Deckard.

  “Okay,” she whispered as he released her arm and silently commanded that she stay in her seat.

  His profile looked so strong and masculine as he passed the front of the vehicle and January couldn’t believe that he was unattached. Except, she didn’t really know that, just assumed. For all she knew, he had a woman waiting for him back home in Atlanta.

  She didn’t have a chance to ponder his singleness because Deckard opened the door to the truck and lifted her out of the seat, kissing her forehead as he set her on her feet.

  As he stepped toward the bed of the truck to grab the supplies, January’s eyelids squeezed together until just the smallest of slits remained. The fresh powder that had fallen from the night before acted like a mirror as the sun shone down on it, practically blinded anyone looking directly at the ground.

  Automatically her hand reached up to hang over her eyes as she waited for them to adjust to the light, but she was saved when Samantha held out her hand with another pair of sunglasses.

  January gladly took them from her friend. “Thanks.”

  Sliding the frames onto her face, January immediately felt relief from the bright sun. She wondered if Deckard had a pair in his truck, and as he approached, she noticed he was wearing a pair of Wayfarers.

  She licked her lips as she took him in. He had removed his coat and watching him strut toward her and Samantha in a dark red sweater that was pulled taut against his chest and arms. His dark jeans looked like they were made to fit perfectly around his muscled thighs. Even the gray scarf he kept tossed around his neck only added to his sex appeal.

  January was a goner. She didn’t even feel the chill in the air as she watched him take each step closer.

  “Wipe away the drool,” Samantha whispered and January shushed her. “Not that I blame you. Because, damn,” her friend added.

  Deckard held the ax and bag across one of his shoulders while his other arm came up and wrapped around January.

  “Ready?” he asked them both.

  Just as January began to take a step, Samantha reached out and held her back. “Deckard, why don’t you go ahead and we’ll be right behind you. We need to catch up.”

  At January’s look of horror, Deckard began to laugh. “Sure. Just don’t dawdle too long.”

  The women watched as he walked away, whistling an unfamiliar tune as he went. January was sure both of them were staring at Deckard’s backside with every step he took.

  “Girl, you are one lucky woman. That man is delicious.”

  “He really is. I don’t even know why I said no to him in the first place.”

  Her comment broke both of them free from the butt-induced trance they were in and Samantha looked up at her. “You were scared of getting hurt again. I get it.”

  “I’m going to get hurt again anyway, but I’ll be prepared this time.”

  “Maybe he’ll surprise you.”

  January was hoping that maybe she could convince him to stay and not go back home to Atlanta, but she knew he had a business to run. He had mentioned while they were searching through articles that morning that he had applied for a loan to open his own practice. It was what he had always wanted to do. But, she surmised, she could enjoy Deckard while he was in town.

  As they began to walk, Samantha asked, “So tell me how all of this happened?”

  “With Christmas?”

  “No, you told me about the wish and ornament on the phone. And it totally seems plausible, knowing you. But what I want to know are the juicy details leading up to all of it. Like how are you and Deckard together at all?”

  January smiled as they began walking and she gave her friend a rundown on the past two days. She loved Samantha’s reaction when she mentioned answering the door to Deckard in just a shirt and flashing the man her panties when she fell. And both women had to fan their faces when she described their kiss after dinner.

  “Man, I’m just going to live vicariously through you. Grayson is great, but we’ve never had anything heated like that.”

  “But you guys just started dating,” January claimed and Samantha pinned her with a steely gaze that she could sense through the sunglasses both women were wearing. “Okay, I get your point,” she added, realizing that she and Deckard had just started dating as well. But it didn’t feel like it. Whatever they had was something more potent than any year-long relationship she’d ever been in.

  Silence followed as they kept a step a few yards behind Deckard until he came to a stop and turned toward them. They were standing in a beautiful clearing in the middle of the forest. It was something out of a fairytale.

  “So, how do we do this?”

  January realized that she hadn’t taken the time to describe to either of them what her perfect Christmas tree would look like. They were surrounded on all sides by Eastern White Pine, which would make the perfect tree, now she just had to find one that was the right height and width.

  “We need a tree around seven and a half feet tall, and full. We also need to run our hands across the branches to check and see how healthy the tree is. We don’t want a lot of needles shedding.”

  The group split up but stayed close as they each focused on the mission at hand. To January, every one seemed too tall or too bare. She couldn’t find the one.

  “Hey!” Deckard shouted five minutes later from across the clearing. “What about this one?”

  January rushed toward the sound of his voice and came to a stop when she caught a glimpse of the tree standing proudly beside Deckard, who looked equally as proud. His chest was puffed out and he rested his hands on his hips. It was adorable.

  “That’s perfect,” she whispered. The emotions the moment conjured up soared through her so quickly she almost fell to the ground in her haste to get to Deckard. January launched herself into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist at the same time. She was glad he had sat down his ax because he was able to enfold her in his embrace.

  “It’s so perfect.” January felt her breath move against the skin of his neck as she murmured.

  “All right, Paul Bunyan. Let’s get this show on the road, I can’t feel my toes,” Samantha jokingly complained.

  Deckard allowed January to slide down his body, making sure to add in a squeeze of her hand as he stepped away to grab the ax. With his guidance, the women stepped out of the way and watched as he effortlessly chopped down the tree.

  In the plastic bag, Deckard retrieved and unpacked a tarp and some rope, creating a makeshift sleigh to carry the tree back to the truck. />
  He refused their assistance to pull the contraption up the hill, but he didn’t seem to struggle with the weight, only adjusting his gloved hands once. The trees fell behind them until they were a small line in the distance and the two vehicles were in view.

  “Do you want to come over to the house and help decorate?” January asked Samantha, but her friend politely declined as she had special plans to play out a mountain man fantasy with her beau.

  They hugged goodbye just as Deckard finished loading the tree in the back of his truck.

  “Ready?” she asked him as he closed the gate.

  “Yep. Let’s get out of the cold. Up you go,” he gestured as he moved to hold her door open.

  The ride to her house was quick, and though she knew that Deckard had been in her space before she nervously fidgeted in her seat, twisting her fingers and picking at the seam of her jeans.

  He must have noticed because his hand settled on top of hers after he turned off the truck.

  “Hey, what has you so worked up?”

  He moved her hands so that he could grasp the one closest to him, intertwining their fingers. Instantly she was soothed by his touch. It was a revelation to January that this man could calm her down in an on the spot.

  “I have no idea.”

  “Is it me coming inside your house? I’ve been here before.”

  “Uninvited, I might add.”

  Chuckling Deckard said, “But always welcome.” She joined him with a giggle and her nerves dissipated even more.

  “Do you want me to help bring the tree inside?”

  “If you can open the door, I think I can manage.”

  They both slipped out of the truck and January rushed up the stairs of her porch to open the door for Deckard, who had already lifted the tree and tarp free from the truck. Then she remembered the bucket and dirt they had picked up at the general store. Skipping back down to the vehicle, she grabbed the supplies and situated them in the house in the same spot her mother had placed the Christmas tree every year.

  Together Deckard and January positioned the tree in the large metal bucket and settled the soil around it, making sure to add some water when they were finished.

  Standing back to gaze at the flourishing addition, she noticed Deckard had a contemplative expression with pinched lips and narrowed eyes.

  “What?”

  “It’s nothing, but what if there are bugs?”

  It wasn’t what she had expected to hear, but now that the notion was out there, January was doing her best to keep from freaking out.

  “Um. . .”

  Breaking his façade Deckard laughed heartily, bending over with his chuckles. Once he seemed to calm down, he said, “I shook it outside and dusted it with powder we keep at the shop for plants brought indoors. I’m sorry, you should have seen your face.”

  Cocky bastard.

  “Yes, well, you should see your face.”

  January pretended to have her feelings hurt, crossing her arms against her chest and pouting her lips.

  “Aw, don’t be upset with me,” Deckard pleaded as he reached out and pulled her closer, even her stubbornness was no match for him.

  “I’m not,” she admitted with her body pressed against him, she could feel the steady beat of his heart against the palms of her hands as they rested on his chest.

  Something in the air shifted and neither January or Deckard seemed to be able to pull away from each other. There was an invisible force drawing them closer. Deckard’s strong hand moved up her arm until it rested on her cheek. She resisted from closing her eyes and relaxing into his touch even though every fiber of her body told her to do just that.

  “You do something to me. I’ve never met anyone like you before. You’re a complete surprise,” he whispered, his gaze never faltering.

  She wanted to tell him that she felt the same, that he completely flipped her world on its axis, but the words didn’t come. January was too lost in the blue of his eyes as they stared back at her.

  But it seemed that Deckard didn’t need to hear a reply, he simply bent his body forward until he could capture her lips with his. This kiss wasn’t soft and sweet. Instead, it was a continuation of their kiss in the forest. It was fueled with passion and need, and January knew that if she let it continue as fervently as it was, that they’d soon progress to another level that she wasn’t sure either of them was ready for. At least not mentally. Physically her body was cheering on the sidelines with pom-poms waving joyously in the air.

  Deckard’s hands trailed beneath her coat and silently urged her to discard it. She quickly shrugged it from her shoulders and it pooled on the floor at her boot-clad feet along with Deckard’s scarf that January slipped from around his neck.

  They couldn’t seem to keep their hands off of each other. Shivers quaked across January’s body when she felt his fingertips linger just under the hem of her sweater above the waistband of her jeans.

  “Deckard.” The name escaped her before she could rein it in. It was said in need, desire, and every ounce of lust in her body. He answered her call without words, but by sliding his hand across her skin to her stomach where his fingertips lingered on the button of her jeans silently asking for permission.

  January nibbled on his lip, giving him the answer they both were seeking, but just as the button flicked free from the loop, January’s cell phone rang in her purse. And she recognized the ringtone she wouldn’t be able to ignore. Both she and Deckard moaned in unison at the intrusion.

  “Sorry, it’s my mom,” January quickly apologized as she took a step back and began rifling through her bag on the small table, searching for her phone.

  “Where are you?” her mother shouted on the other end of the call just as January answered.

  “What?” glancing around the room, she tried to ignore the tent in Deckard’s pants. A few seconds passed before she remembered what she had been looking for. The calendar in the corner had a bright red circle over today’s date. Even with Christmas not in the picture her mother expected her to be at their house for Augustus’ arrival.

  “Shit,” she murmured in panic.

  “Language,” her mother scolded. “Can I expect you soon, January?”

  “Yes, I’m on my way. Time got away from me, that’s all. See you soon, Mom.”

  Ending the call, January ran her hand through her hair in exasperation. She was enjoying her time with Deckard and really hated to lose a moment with him, but she knew that neither of them was ready for him to meet her parents. And as she looked at him, she could see the disappointment oozing from him, but also understanding. He was close to his family and knew that there would be no backing out.

  “I’m sorry. Can we postpone for tomorrow? We can decorate and make some ornaments at the same time.”

  “Yeah, sure.” The letdown was evident in the tone of his voice. It was low and sullen, not his normal deep voice laced with sex. “I should probably go help my grandparents anyway.”

  “I’ll even make dinner tomorrow.”

  “It’s a date,” he said as he leaned down to pick up his scarf and her coat.

  As he handed her jacket over, January felt a distance between them that was new. And she really disliked it. “Deckard, I wanted to thank you for today. For, well, everything really and for believing me.” She could see that she was breaking through that steely wall he was erecting.

  Leaning down to press a kiss on her forehead, the same spot he had left a peck earlier, Deckard said, “You’re welcome. I’ll see you tomorrow. Text me when you want me to come over.”

  “Okay.”

  Snow had started to fall, and January watched from the picture window situated at the front of her house as Deckard backed his truck out of her driveway. It was silly to miss him already, but she did. She craved more time with him, more than the few hours they’ve had so far.

  With a heavy sigh, she slid her jacket back on, grabbed her purse, then headed out to her car, locking her front door behind he
r.

  January wasn’t sure how she was going to make it through the night without feeling the guilt weighing heavily on her. Not just the remorse of having to send Deckard away, but the responsibility for the reason Christmas was no longer in existence would be her burden to bare for years to come.

  Chapter Five

  Enjoyment at a family get-together around the holidays was uncommon for January. So, she was surprised at how much fun she had spending the previous evening with her family. The arrival of her brother made January want to appear putout that she had to suspend her plans, but as her niece’s swirled around her legs when January stepped through the door her chilled exterior began to thaw. Even Scrooge herself had a hard time staying angry when the cutest princesses wanted her attention.

  She barely thought about Deckard the entire time she was there until her mom brought up that one of the neighbors had seen them outside the general store yesterday in a compromising position.

  Her parents wanted to meet him even after she explained that Deckard wasn’t sticking around and had no intention to do so. Her mother huffed and scooped up the kids to make some clay stars for the solstice display on the mantle of their fireplace. Her father, on the other hand, had told her that she was worth sticking around for. January wasn’t sure how true that statement was, or if it was just her father letting her down gently, but it felt good just the same.

  When she arrived home later that evening after disappointing her mother again after clarifying that she would not be attending the solstice festival with them this year, January had considered messaging Deckard and asking if he could come back over and continue what they had begun earlier. But she didn’t want to become that needy woman.

  Raising her arms above her head January stretched then she sat her bag on the coffee table, taking a good look at the empty Christmas tree. It was a disappointing sight.

  Her phone rang as she was getting ready for bed and fear shot through her when her mother’s name flashed across the screen. In a rare moment that January was going to remember for the rest of her days, her mother had called to apologize for the way she acted about the festival. Her mother was also concerned about how January had acted. “Out of sorts,” her mother had claimed. With a deep breath, January let it all flow. The wish, Christmas, the guilt, all of it. And her mother listened. She didn’t judge, she didn’t scoff, she simply opened her mind to the possibilities.