Merrier With You

by Ellen Joy

  Elizabeth gave her a look.

  “What?”

  “Don’t.” Elizabeth could tell her warning meant nothing to her mother.

  “What do you mean?”

  Elizabeth dug her fork into more mac ‘n cheese. “Please, don’t start meddling in this. Whatever it is.”

  Sarah placed a hand on her chest. “Me? Meddle?”

  “Ha!” hooted John, from the other side of the room. This made Elizabeth snicker as well.

  “What are you two laughing at?” Sarah huffed. John began to cough. “I’m not going to meddle in Matt’s love life. I swear, the two of you are being ridiculous.”

  She picked up her mug and walked out of the room. Elizabeth guessed she was going to call Frank.

  SOMETHING HAPPENED to Katie on the boat. Matt could tell by the way she was leaning against the washboard. She stood up straight, her shoulders back, her chin held high. Her hair blew back away from her face. She seemed to be at ease, not troubled like the days before. The water worked wonders that way.

  When he first thought about taking her snowboarding, he did feel sorry for her. Here she was, all alone on Christmas. She still had the ring, so she wasn’t sure whether her engagement was completely off.

  Now her ring finger was bare.

  He also understood. He had been there. He had survived a very public break up. He knew how lonely and terrible it felt. Justine ripped his heart apart then stomped on it with Freddy.

  At one point, he may have fooled himself that Katie was an old friend in need. A smart, beautiful friend, and not feel anything more. He knew neither one of them was in a position to get involved in a relationship. Not to mention that she lived across the country. But the more time he spent with her, the more she was on his mind. If he was honest with himself, he wasn’t sure if he had ever stopped thinking about her. She had always been the girl that got away, and he hated the idea of her slipping away again. Whatever happened between her and her fiancé was none of his business. But it was hard to know that she was single, while also knowing her heart was with someone else.

  The summer with Katie was one of the best in his life. He had wanted things to work out between them so badly, but when life returned to normal and the summer heat disappeared like the leaves on the trees, she called him less and less. He wasn’t necessarily surprised when she stopped altogether.

  That’s when Justine came into the picture.

  Justine had always been the girl next door. A Camden Cove native like himself, Justine grew up on the harbor, at the beach, and was also from a family of local business owners. She was like her parents, his parents, and their parents before that. They both stuck around town after graduation, living at home. Justine commuted to Portland for school while Matt worked as a sternman on his grandfather’s boat during the day and cooked in the restaurant at night. It seemed they were a couple before he even realized what was happening.

  When they started dating, he had just started fishing full-time. At first, Matt could handle the schedule—waking up before four, out on the water for at least eight hours, then another eight at the restaurant. Justine seemed to understand in the beginning, but when his schedule didn’t change while he waited for his license, she became less so. He couldn’t blame her. He could only give her a night or two a week, and on those nights he was exhausted.

  They dated on and off through the years, but once she graduated, Justine started talking about marriage. To say that Matt wasn’t ready, was an understatement. He was still living under his parents’ roof. He only earned twenty percent of the daily catch as a sternman, and anything he made as a line cook, he stored away for his own boat. There was no way he could afford it, plus he wasn’t ready to be a husband. He wanted to go out with the boys, not settle down and play house.

  “Why don’t you just work at the restaurant like Jack?” Justine would often ask. “Why do you have to fish?”

  That was the first sign they were wrong for each other. Justine never liked the idea of him trying to get his own boat and crew. If he could have a job that was certain, in his family’s business, a restaurant that had been successful for years, why struggle in fishery? When Matt tried to explain how working on the water was a part of him and made him happy, Justine couldn’t understand.

  The second thing wrong about them was Freddy Harrington.

  Freddy was always on the fringes. Whenever they got into an argument, Freddy was there waiting, ready to swoop in and lend an ear or a shoulder to cry on.

  Somehow Freddy managed to get a license from the state, a boat from his dad, and packed the area with his traps everywhere, including Matt’s family’s territory.

  The third problem was that Justine got pregnant.

  The fourth... they got married.

  They didn’t even get engaged. They just eloped, driving down to city hall, a woman paying her dog’s license their witness. Soon, she became resentful of him working all the time. She wanted to try for another baby, and he didn’t even want to consider it. Their tiny two-bedroom house became smaller as time went on. One night, after a double shift, he found Justine crying at the kitchen table.

  “I want a husband.”

  “You have a husband.” Annoyance rang in his voice. Did she think he liked working all day and night?

  “Do you even know where I was last night?”

  Matt looked at her and realized he didn’t. He had come home and gone straight to bed after his shift. He figured she was out with friends.

  “A normal couple checks in, but you never do.” Justine stopped making eye contact. “I’m like a roommate.”

  If he had known Freddy was behind the scenes, lurking in the shadows, waiting for the right moment to sneak in, Matt might have worked harder on fixing things between them. He was just so tired all the time. He hadn’t really noticed her feelings. Life was hard, but wasn’t that the point of being married, sticking with it through the tough times?

  He didn’t know how bad it was until it was too late. He and Justine had been fighting a lot, but he figured it was a mixture of everything.

  It was Sarah who noticed Justine’s bracelet, gold, with a small charm dangling from her wrist. Matt wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but Sarah asked if he had given it to Justine.

  Justine had straightened up, but pulled her shirtsleeve down to cover the piece of jewelry. “A friend gave it to me.”

  “That’s an awfully nice friend.” Sarah’s tone was harsh, and Matt was annoyed that his mother had been so rude. He was going to say something, but something about the way Justine held her stare with Sarah made him hesitate. For the rest of the night, Justine hid the bracelet. When she went to bed, she kept it on as she slept. Once he knew she was asleep, he studied it.

  The charm was of an anchor. Anyone would have thought it was from Matt.

  He knew it was from Freddy.

  What Matt never understood, even to this day, was why she just didn’t have enough guts to come out and tell him. She just dangled it out there like bait, waiting for him to discover it. Or his brother Jack, considering he was the one who walked in on her and Freddy above the restaurant.

  The female Williamses cursed Justine when she moved Freddy directly into their house. Luckily the divorce was quick, and Matt heard that Freddy covered Justine’s lawyer’s fees.

  He figured that’s how life worked. Just when he hit rock bottom, something brought him back to the surface, so he could breathe again. And now, as he watched Katie standing there on the boat, he knew that life was giving him another shot. As he pulled into the harbor, watching the shoreline come into focus, he knew he’d be a fool to let her go again.

  Once he docked Maggie Mae into her slip, he closed everything up and they walked down the dock together.

  “Want to grab a coffee?” she asked. “My treat.”

  “Absolutely.”

  Maybe it was the energy from the sea or being around Katie again, but he didn’t want to their day to end. They talked as they cr
ossed Harbor Lane, then Matt suddenly stopped in the middle of the street.

  “What is my mother doing?” he said, looking inside the bakery. Sitting at the window with Frank and David, Sarah waved.

  “They’re up to something,” he said, stepping up onto the sidewalk and opening the door for her.

  “What do you mean, they’re up to something?” she asked as they walked inside.

  “How was the boat ride?!” all three asked in unison.

  Matt smirked as he said, “What a coincidence that you’re all here.”

  Matt saw his mom give Frank a nod, and as if reading from a script, Frank asked Katie, “How about a cup of coffee?”

  Sarah then proceeded with her part. “Why don’t you two join us?”

  Sarah gestured Matt and Katie to the two empty chairs that faced the harbor. She made a point to make eye contact with only Katie, because she knew that he knew what she was up to. Just as Matt was about to tease her, David slammed open the kitchen door with a plate of pastries in his hands.

  “Would you like to sample some of my buttery madeleines?” David pushed the plate closest to Matt and Katie. “I dipped them in chocolate ganache.”

  Frank nonchalantly said, “Matt, I forgot I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow morning. I won’t be able to do the delivery down to Boston. Do you mind going alone?”

  Matt shook his head. “No problem, I can go myself.”

  Sarah asked Katie, “Have you ever been to Quincy Market?”

  Katie finished chewing before she answered. “No, I’ve never been to Boston, other than the airport.”

  “It’s lovely this time of year.” Frank sounded casual, but Matt saw right through their act. “All the Christmas decorations and lights, and shopping around Faneuil Hall.”

  “The North End has so many great restaurants, and it’s all right there,” David said.

  Matt almost choked on his coffee, but smiled when Katie raised her eyebrow at him not in on the ruse.

  Undeterred, Frank soldiered on and suggested, “You should go down with Matt tomorrow. He’ll show you around.”

  Matt was amused by their instigating. Then, just as they hoped, he fell into step. “You should come with me. I can take you around the city.”

  Everyone turned their attention to Katie. She thought for a moment, making Matt slowly die inside, thinking she was going to say no.

  “I have no plans. That sounds wonderful.”

  Matt let out his held breath, hoping she didn’t hear. A single laugh escaped Sarah as Frank practically jumped out of his seat. He tried to cover his enthusiasm by grabbing the plates and rushing back to the kitchen. David continued to suggest places to visit. “You need to see the harbor, and stop in at Haymarket, then hit the commons...”

  A CUP OF COFFEE AND four pastries later, Kate walked with Matt down Harbor Lane to his truck.

  “You do realize that was a set-up, don’t you?” He pointed back toward the bakery with his thumb.

  Kate looked back. Sarah, Frank, and David all waved through the window, still watching them. She laughed. “I didn’t until now.” She paused then said, “Oh... you don’t have to take me.”

  “Are you kidding?” Matt stuffed his hands into his pockets. “I’m looking forward to it.”

  He pointed to the second-floor windows of The Fish Market. “That’s my place, above the restaurant.”

  The Fish Market sat at the mouth of the cove, overlooking the granite shore. She covered her eyes with her hand and studied it. “That’s an amazing view.”

  “It’s cozy.” He looked at the building. “It’s perfect for me.”

  Emotions suddenly bubbled up inside her. Matt lived exactly the way he said he would all those years ago. The way he had always dreamed. Out on the ocean, in control of his own boat, his own business, his own life.

  When did she stop believing in her dreams?

  Worse, when did she stop believing in herself?

  Eric leaving her didn’t mean her life was over. Her mother’s life may have fallen apart when her father left, but that didn’t mean hers had to, as well.

  Kate slowed at the end of the footbridge. “I think I’d like to walk back, if you don’t mind.”

  He shook his head and pulled his hood up. “See you tomorrow?”

  “Can’t wait.” Then she added, “Meet at the bakery?”

  He nodded and walked backwards, calling out, “Nine o’clock."

  The sun was setting as she arrived at Vivi’s. Streaks of pink and lavender met the ocean’s black edge. As she stepped inside, she looked for her phone, then remembered it plunging to the bottom of the ocean. She immediately regretted it.

  What if Eric had been the one who was calling? What if he was trying to get in touch with her?

  Vivi’s home phone rang.

  She ran to it and picked it up. “Hello?”

  She held her breath until her sister Jen said, “Where have you been all day?”

  Kate sat down on a kitchen stool and sighed audibly into the phone.

  “Nice to hear from you, too.” Her sister’s tone sounded annoyed.

  Kate rubbed her forehead. “No, it is, I’m sorry. I just thought you might be Eric.”

  Then it all came together. Jen was the one who had been calling her on the boat. The little hope she held out now faded away entirely. If he hadn’t even bothered to text Merry Christmas back to her, then he wasn’t ever going to reach out.

  She listened to her sister, who talked about Christmas and her family. She listened, but looked out at the harbor and the lights on above The Fish Market. After her sister started to complain about being so busy with her family, Kate said, “I got to go, Jen.”

  She hung up the phone and looked out the windows at the golden lights above the restaurant. Being at the helm of that boat had been the best thing she’s felt since leaving Minnesota. She’d give anything to be able to live life at the helm. Go after what she wanted, and not sit around feeling sorry for herself.

  She didn’t need Eric.

  She needed to dream again.

  Nine

  Kate woke with her journal lying on the other side of the bed, her computer screen opened and dead next to it. She must’ve fallen asleep at some point while she rested her eyes. Turning on her side, she peeked out the window. The sun’s rays blended like watercolors across the sky, deep purples melting into pink and finally baby blue. In the pale dawn light, she could see the tiny village square. She grabbed her journal and looked over her new list.

  Her list to start over, and start living.

  She stretched and got out of bed, then threw on her robe. She wedged her feet into slippers and headed downstairs. As she cracked open the sliding glass door, the crashing of waves immediately surrounded her.

  The air felt mild and a little humid. Perfect for running.

  She looked in the direction of The Fish Market and noticed she was getting into that habit, especially now that she knew Matt lived there.

  Thoughts of yesterday slipped in as she ate toast with peanut butter. Her goal was to run along the ocean’s frozen shore.

  Next was Quincy Market.

  Then, eating in the North End.

  And then hauling lobsters.

  All in that order.

  While she ran, she focused on another one of her lists. Her plans for when she returned to Minnesota. The first thing she had to do was move her things out of the house. The house was from another life, and she no longer wanted it. Eric hadn’t moved in yet, but the space was too big for just her. Hopefully the sale would happen quickly, and whatever came from it, she would save. All of it would go toward start-up costs for her new business venture—Kate O’Neil Design.

  Until she found a new place, she’d ask to stay with her mother, she couldn’t stay there. She found a couple of listings in the city and enquired by emailing the real estate agents. The idea of owning her own business brought a new excitement she hadn’t felt before. Throughout the night, she worked on
her mission statement and her personal brand. She researched what she could online about business start-ups. She found advice about what she needed to do before setting out on her own, the initial costs and fees, whether or not to hire an attorney for filing for a LLC, and the costs of outsourcing assistance from independent contractors.

  By the time Kate reached the beach, she realized she didn’t want to wait. When she’d return to work, she’d hand in her notice.

  She had worked in the industry for more than a decade, and had an extensive client list and more than a few who would recommend her work. She had kept detailed notes on all her accounts, and had a good rapport with her clients. For the first time in years, she could feel her dreams at her fingertips.

  By the time Kate reached the end of Perkin’s Beach, gray clouds covered the sun’s rays, but the snow still glowed against the dark granite bluffs. She stopped running and stood at the edge of the water, listening to the waves. Their roar against the rocky shores could be heard off in the distance, and had such an effect on her whole being. A day ago, she had felt the weight of the world on her shoulders. Now, as she stood at the mouth of the Atlantic she felt light, like a feather floating in the wind.

  MATT LISTENED AS THE meteorologist warned of a new nor’easter threatening to dump another twelve to eighteen inches on the East Coast. The unpredictability of these storms was usually what excited Matt the most, but the impending storm posed a problem for his and Katie’s day in the city.

  “This is going to be another big one, folks, so make sure you have extra food and water on hand. It’s always good to have a battery-powered radio in case of a power outage.”

  He grabbed his phone and wallet before heading out the door, hoping she wouldn’t cancel because of the snow. When he stepped inside the bakery, the crowd was a bit heavier than normal. He looked around, searching out Katie, reminded him that he needed to finally get her number.

  “Did you hear about the storm coming in?” Frank asked as he got to the front of the line.

  “I can’t believe another nor’easter.” They had been nailed this winter already, and it wasn’t even January. They had at least four more months to go.