by Jahquel J
“Excuse me, I’m on lunch.”
“Excuse me, I’m ten minutes from fucking you up,” I mocked and stared at him with menacing eyes.
“Woah, woah, what is going on here? Katherine?” he called his assistant, who slowly walked inside the office. I could tell Katherine didn’t want none of the smoke this pink looking muthafucka was about to receive.
“He just came in, Sir,” she explained and then closed the door behind us.
“Can this be scheduled at a later date? I’m having lunch right now,” he sat back down and cut into his steak.
I took my hand and brushed the whole meal onto the floor, sending his papers, phone and computer mouse with it. “Katherine, please call security.”
“Katherine, call security and I’ll fuck you up my damn self,” I pressed the same button he had pressed seconds before. “My niece attempted suicide on this campus and you’re enjoying a fucking steak lunch.”
“Kiki Mooney?” he asked, like he didn’t already know.
“She came to you weeks before and told you about the fucking inbred ass munchers by the lunchroom. There was video showing her body and neither of you done nothing about it.”
“She willingly participated in relationship with one of the students.”
“Doesn’t mean she wanted to be fucking recorded!” I barked at him and he damn near jumped back into the window behind him.
“We spoke to the students and they said there was no video. What else did you want me to do? It seemed like a petty adolescent fight.”
“Did Kiki hanging herself in the fucking boy’s bathroom sound like a petty adolescent fight? I pay out the ass to make sure my kid not only receives good education but is protected and you failed her.”
“We followed all the protocol.”
“So, in that protocol, was there something that said to call the parent? You all failed to let me know what was going on.”
“Yes, we failed to bring this to your attention. We figured she would fill you in at home.”
I paced the floor. “I’m ten minutes from breaking your fucking jaw.”
“Sir, I understand you’re upset, but violence isn’t the answer.”
“But, posting child porn on the internet is?” I sat in the chair in front of him. My hand was itching to pull the gun out and pop one right in his head. With Kiki standing here, I didn’t want to put her through any more traumatic shit.
“If she chooses to return next year, we’ll do a better job.”
“Nah. She not coming back, and neither are those little assholes.”
“Excuse me?”
“You’re going to expel them, and…” I grabbed his phone and opened it. “If you so happen to accept them back next year, I’ll put a bullet in her head. It takes nothing to make it up to Yale,” I showed him the picture of his screensaver of a girl in a Yale sweatshirt.
He gulped hard. “It’s not easy. Their family has been donating to this school for years,” he stammered.
“Okay,” I walked to the door and opened it. “Pick out a pink casket, she looks like the type to like some dramatic shit like that. Want me to tell her anything before I do it? Nah, nah, I’ll just do it quick and easy,” I laughed and headed out the door.
We were almost down the hall when I heard my name being called. “Mr. Mooney! I…I’ll do...I’ll draw up the papers today!” he hollered down the hallway.
“I’ll be back to check this week,” I winked.
Me and Kiki got into the car and I took her to grab something to eat before we headed home. “Why did you do all of that?” she wondered out loud.
“For you and your sisters, I’ll air this entire world out. You mean the world to me and when someone hurts you, they hurt me… I don’t know about you, but I don’t like being hurt.”
“Thank you, Ro,” she leaned her head on my shoulder as I drove us home. Kiki had been my baby girl for a long time, so whenever someone fucked with her, I had to step in and make sure that she was good. When I think about how I could have been burying her, my mind went dark and I wanted to kill everyone who was involved. She was my angel and I would always protect her.
“Always and forever.”
We need to talk. Justice sent me a text message and I sighed. Whenever she initiated a talk, I knew the shit wouldn’t be good.
“You feel like going to see Yasmine?”
“Yeah, we can,” she said, not taking her head up from my shoulder.
I headed to Justice’s crib and smiled when I saw her new whip parked out front. There were a few people snapping pictures in front of it. Justice deserved everything that I was planning on giving her. When I sat back and thought about how I did her, I was fucking disgusted with myself. How could I allow myself to slip back into something with Lavern, especially when I had a woman like Justice waiting for me? Show me a perfect man and I’ll show you a liar. I’m not perfect and I never pretended to be. I make mistakes and I happened to make one that messed up my life and a chance with the love of my life. Justice didn’t deserve the shit I did to her and I beat myself up every day because of that shit. Even if we never got back together, I would always make sure she was good and that I supported her and Yasmine in whatever they both wanted to do. She did so much to bring our baby into this world and how did I repay her? By showing up with lipstick on me from another woman.
I knocked on the door and it took a minute for her to answer. When she did, she had a maxi dress that dusted the floor, and her hair was pulled up in a ponytail. “Hey Kiki!” she hugged Kiki tightly.
“Hey Jus, I missed you.”
“I missed you so much. How are you?”
“Better,” Kiki smiled.
“Let me tell you something, the next time you try and leave us, me and you are going to have a problem. I should have been there for you and I’m sorry that I wasn’t,” she apologized and hugged her again.
“Thank you,” Kiki said. “Is Yasmine sleep?”
“Girl, no. She in that crib making noise because it’s food time. Take the bottle on that table and you can feed her. Be careful.”
“Okay,” she said and went to the back to feed Yasmine.
“Damn, you look good,” I licked my lips and looked at her up and down. “Ass poking out, shit, Yasmine just added to your beautiful curves.”
“I need to lose some weight, she gave me too much booty and breast,” she laughed. This was good. She shared a laugh with me. “Anyway, what are these keys?” she held up the keys to her condo.
The condo was near the house in a community called the Yacht Club; it was a ten-minute walk from my house. As much as she wanted to be independent, I couldn’t sleep knowing she wasn’t protected. Since she didn’t want to sleep under my roof, it brought me comfort to know that she was sleeping in a gated community with my daughter every night. I put everything in her name, so even if we didn’t get back together, the place was hers and I paid for it in cash.
“I got you a new place. I know you wanted to be independent, but you have to be smart.”
“I am smart. My neighborhood is safe and you’re the one who got that elaborate ass car. I was good with a damn Nissan,” she huffed.
“This place is safe and is in a gated community. You mentioned putting roots down for Yasmine, and this is the place you can do it at.”
“Priest, I don’t want to live in a house that you own. Even if I don’t own this place, the rental agreement is in my name.”
“I put everything in your name. Did you even look at the folder she handed you?”
She grew quiet. “Why would you do that?”
“Because I support you wanting to be independent and wanting to do it on your own. I just want to make sure that while you’re being independent, you’re being safe too,” I walked closer to her. “I know when we got together everything moved so fast, so we didn’t get that chance to actually feel what it felt like to be together, but not live together. This condo is yours forever. If we don’t work out, I don’t wan
t you to feel like you have to move, it’s yours. Because, the next time you move out, you’ll be moving into a bigger crib and you’ll be my wife.”
“You sound so sure of yourself.”
“I know what I did, and I know what I have to do to get back what I lost.”
She walked over to the couch and sat down, crossing her legs. “About what you did… the calls and messages are getting out of hand,” she spoke about Lavern.
Lavern must have got her number out of my phone when I was asleep. Even if, I didn’t see what her reason was for contacting Justice. She had nothing to do with what we had going on. If Lavern was mad with anyone, she should have been angry with me, not Justice.
“I’m gonna meet up with her and tell her to stop contacting you. This shit is crazy that she’s even reaching out to you.”
“No, I want to meet with her. There’s obviously a reason she keeps calling me, and not you.”
I understood that Justice wanted to put an end to all of this, but meeting with Lavern wasn’t a good idea. If her ass kept calling and contacting her, then that meant that she was tripping and I didn’t want anything to happen to Justice because of it. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if something happened to her because of some shit that I dragged her into.
“Nah, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“I don’t care what you think. This woman has harassed me for weeks and you don’t think I have nothing to say to her?”
“I’m not saying that. I just can’t risk something happening to you.”
“She’s not dangerous. Your dick is good, but not good enough to go to prison over,” she side eyed me.
“Word? That’s how you feeling?” I laughed.
She chuckled, then messed with the ends of her ponytail. “In all seriousness, she needs to stop contacting me and if that means I need to go and sit down with her to see why, then it’s something that I’m willing to do.”
“Then, I’m going to come with you.”
“Nope.”
“Justice?”
“Priest?” she countered.
“You need someone to come with you.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m a grown ass woman. Watch your daughter. That’s all I need you to do right now.”
I sighed and leaned back on the couch. “When you gonna move into your new place?”
“How do you know I’m gonna like it? I haven’t even seen the place yet.”
I looked around her apartment. “No offense, that shit nicer than this.”
She hit me on the shoulder. “Excuse you? My apartment is cozy and it’s mine.”
“That condo is yours too and hella cozy.”
“I’ll go this week and see if I like it or not.”
It felt nice seeing her being able to crack a smile. Since everything happened, she wore this stone face and if it wasn’t the stone face, she had this look like she was about to cry if one thing went wrong. The fact that she let me sit back on her couch and hold a conversation longer than five minutes told me that we were making baby steps.
“Ight. Let me know how you like it.”
“Uh huh. I have a question,” she asked and turned to look me in the eyes. I sat up and gave her my undivided attention.
“What’s up?”
“Was I not enough? What was I lacking that you found in Lavern?”
I dropped my head because I never wanted her to feel like it was her fault. At first, I blamed our argument and the foul shit she said, but I knew that wasn’t the reason for me doing what I did. It was nothing that Justice did that made me do the shit that I did to her.
“Ma, you were more than enough. Shit probably more than I was used to. You bring so much to the table and maybe a piece of me got scared. Then, Lavern popped back up and I found comfort in having someone that knew me back them. I don’t know, I’m rambling,” I took a breath. “Truth is, Lavern was a small piece of my sister. Yes, the girls are too, but when I saw her, I thought back to all the times we would kick it in our old apartment with Sandy. A nigga would give up anything to be that teenager who had the world at his fingertips. It’s not an excuse, but it’s the reason that I gravitated toward Lavern. I also learned, that as much as I would give up being that teenager again, I’m not him anymore. I have grown and experienced shit and Lavern is just that… the past.”
“I hear all that you’re saying, but how can I believe you? How can I believe that she won’t be a problem down the line? You did something so heart-breaking to me and I’m trying hard to forgive and not let the hate take over my heart.”
I reached out and grabbed her hand. “My word doesn’t mean much right now. I put it on our daughter’s life that if you give us a fighting chance, I’ll never do no shit like that again. Me and Lavern are done, and I put that on my own life. I just want to make you happy and raise our daughter together.”
“It’s some things I have to think about. In the meantime, just be there for your daughter. She needs you more than anything else.”
“You already know I’m gonna be there for her. I want to be there for the both of you,” I kissed her hand.
She smiled and looked away. “Just fix it,” was all she said before she got up from the couch and went into Yasmine’s nursery.
I nodded my head. If she said that I needed to fix it, then I was going to fix it. Justice and Yasmine meant everything to me, and I had finally got what I wanted. Us, niggas were stupid. We could get the best woman in the world and our stupid asses would fuck up because we were scared. Men were macho and felt like we could take over the world. When it came to women, especially one that had her shit together, we were scared shitless. A woman that had her shit together and didn’t need you, was a woman that we wanted, yet feared. Why? Because she didn’t have to put up with our bullshit. She had options and as quick as her stilettos walked into our lives, she’d walk right back out. Justice had a degree, her own business and had her future ahead of her. She didn’t need me and made that clear when she moved out of my house and never looked back. It took one thing for me to do for her to toss her bags over her shoulder and build a life without me. If my woman told me to fix it, then I was going to fix it and make it work.
We need to talk, I sent Lavern a text message.
You know my address.
Bet.
I let two days slip by before I found the courage to bring myself back to Lavern’s apartment. The other day was nice and peaceful. It was exactly what me and Kiki both needed. Justice cooked dinner, we watched movies and I got to put my daughter to sleep without having to knock on the door and being let in. On the ride home, I could tell that Kiki missed Justice. Her own mood changed, and she seemed to be in better spirits since we spent the day with her. Justice didn’t know the hold she had over me and the girls. She was that sparkle that we needed in our lives since Sandy left. Everything in my spirit told me that I shouldn’t have come to Lavern’s apartment. I had this feeling and I tried to shake it off since I woke up this morning on Justice’s couch. I came over to put Yasmine to sleep and I ended up falling asleep with her on my chest while sitting on the couch.
When I woke up this morning, she put a blanket over me. I peeked into her room and saw she and Yasmine were still asleep, so I took her spare key and dipped out to head home to shower and get ready to meet with Lavern. She had to know that what we had was years ago and that we couldn’t continue that shit. We both had changed and had things going on in our lives. She was getting divorced and I wanted to eventually marry Justice. Not to mention, we both had kids that we had to take into consideration. As much as I made her remember the old days, we had to be smart and realize that our young years wasn’t who we were now. We were two different people and outside of sex, we had nothing in common anymore.
I knocked on her door and stood back. She turned the locks and the door opened. “Hey,” she greeted and held the door opened.
I walked in and looked around. “Your daughter here?”
“No
, she’s with her father,” I found it weird that her ass never had her daughter. She was here that one time and I had never saw her again. “You can take a seat in the living room. Want some water?”
“Yeah. I’ll take some,” I replied and sat down on the couch. She returned with two bottles of water and sat on the opposite couch.
“What did you want to talk about?”
“Why do you keep hitting up Justice?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “Because I can,” I thought she would deny the shit. It was the complete opposite. Her ass was sitting here looking like she was proud of doing the shit.
“How old are we? You playing on her phone as a grown woman is corny, Lavern.”
She took a few gulps of her water and stared at me briefly before she spoke. “Corny? What’s corny is how she ends things with you and you get scared and stop messing with me. How can you break off what we had?”
“What we fucking had was years ago, Lavern!” I hollered. “I was a fool to even think that I could get back what we used to have.”
“No, you weren’t. We could. Ro, we were so good together.”
“Were.”
“You are choosing her because she has your child. If you loved her, you wouldn’t have come running to me every chance you got.”
I laughed. “Vern, every time we linked was because you hit me up. You wanna repaint what happened, but you called me each time your husband pissed you off. Stop making it what it wasn’t.”
“I’ll continue to play on her phone.”
“When did you become this fucking petty?”
“The moment I was in a fucking psyche ward because of the shit you did to me. You broke up with me and that shit broke my heart. I couldn’t eat, sleep or do anything. My life felt like it had no purpose. Then, you have the nerve to have this bitch and make her happy.”
“Nah, you tripping. This happened years ago, Lavern. How the fuck are you blaming her for what happened between us more than ten years ago?”
