A Staten Island Love Letter 5

by Jahquel J

  I gasped as I jumped out of my sleep. Holding my heart, I looked out the floor to ceiling window and noticed that it was now dark outside. Looking on the clock on the table, it was ten at night. My heart was still beating rapidly as I thought about the day Summer died and Staten had almost lost his life too. With my hands shaking, I sent Free a text message.

  Can you send me Staten’s new number? I texted her. Free had been working day and night on her work projects, so I knew that she would reply back. Just like I expected, she replied with his contact bubble in our text message thread.

  Thanks.

  She never replied and it was probably because she was still in her feelings about our argument earlier. I dialed his number and leaned up in the bed with my hand rested on my heart. It wouldn’t calm down until I heard his voice.

  “Yo, who this?” his groggy voice answered on the other line.

  “It’s Liberty. Hey,” I replied, feeling better that I had heard his voice.

  I could hear him sitting up from wherever he was laying. “What’s good? You alright?”

  “Yes, I’m fine. I had a dream about the night you crashed when I was working. Just wanted to make sure that you were alright.”

  “Yeah, I’m good. Just fell asleep reading over a contract.”

  “Contract?”

  “Yeah. I bought a barbershop and want to make sure everything good with it.”

  “Cool. I’m happy for you.”

  “I’m happy fo—”

  “Do you still love me?” I cut him off. I had to know if he still loved me the way I loved him. Yes, it was easier to hide it because I hated how he treated me, but I still loved this man and couldn’t act like I didn’t. Free had called me out at a lunch with Justice and I denied, even though I knew my sister knew what I was feeling. It was bad that I was lying in another man’s condo, wanting to be laid up in Staten’s arms.

  “I think you know the answer to that already.”

  “I want to hear you say it,” I needed to hear him tell me. I had to hear his voice when he said it.

  “I still love you; Liberty and I have never stopped loving you,” he admitted.

  I put the phone to my chest and leaned back in the bed with my eyes closed. “Babe? You sleep already?” I heard Ty’s voice.

  “I’ll call you back,” I told Staten.

  “Nah. Be happy, Lib. Take care,” he told me and ended the call.

  Ty came into the bedroom with roses and a Louis Vuitton gift bag. I offered him a weak smile. “I thought you were staying longer?”

  “I heard your voice and figured that I would come home and surprise you. I know it’s hard with me working all the time and I never want my future wife to feel neglected.”

  I had the perfect man standing in front of me, but all that was running through my mind was Shaliq Davis. He was who I wanted, and it was sad that a dream about him getting shot made me realize that.

  “I appreciate that.”

  “I have to fly out tomorrow morning to Milan for a few weeks. I’ll be back a day before the wedding,” he made sure to tell me.

  “Okay,” I replied.

  “I’m gonna go shower. Stay in that robe because I missed exploring that body,” he told me and loosened his tie on his way to the bathroom. I laid back and waited for my future husband to come back from the shower.

  Princeton, New Jersey

  The Davis’ Residence

  Ty had been in Milan for a week and was apparently living his best life. I was in meeting after meeting regarding the wedding. I was the one who had to deal with his mother wanting to pick things out. Ty was a mama’s boy and the more I was around his mother and him, I figured that out. He didn’t make moves unless his mother was involved in it. While I thought that him proposing to me was random and living on the edge, turns out that he spoke to his mother before doing it. She let that slip out when we were cake tasting. Ty did all that popping up to surprise me just to fly off and miss the cake tasting. I was tired of being alone and feeling like I was planning a wedding for me and his mother. Don’t get me wrong, she was a sweet woman and I would be lucky to have her as a mother in law. The fact remained that I had built a better relationship with her than her son.

  When I woke up this morning, I had roses waiting on the kitchen counter with a sweet letter from Ty. He had Kat run down the street to the flower stand and get it for me. He also had her sign the card. Then, he had breakfast sent upstairs to me to enjoy before booking me some time at the spa, then the hair salon. All of that was nice and appreciated. After I ate breakfast, I went into my closet to find something to wear and sobbed. I sobbed so hard that Kat knocked on the door a few times to get me to answer. I felt empty. Some women would kill for a man like Ty. A man that took care of his woman and didn’t have a problem with doing it. Me, I was different. I liked alone time, but I also wanted to feel like I was in a relationship too. I wanted to feel like I was a priority in your life, and with Ty I didn’t feel that. Waking up to flowers, breakfast and a day booked at the spa wasn’t the life that I wanted to live. It wasn’t who I was. I wanted to wake up in bed and have sex, crack jokes and then roll out the bed and go grab some breakfast from Denny’s.

  I sent Kat home early, packed up my bags and had the door man help me load it up into my truck. I took all my clothes and things that I needed, then left Ty a note on the counter. I doubted that he would ever find the note since he was barely home. I’m sure Kat would find it and call him tomorrow. I drove all the way to Free’s house and now I was sitting outside after being let into the gate an hour ago. Gathering the courage to crawl back to my sister who told me that I wasn’t happy was hard. Free called everything that I was feeling. She knew me and knew that I would never be happy living the life that Ty provided. I loved to work and quitting my job was probably one of the hardest things that I had to do.

  I didn’t even notice there were a bunch of cars everywhere. Ghost had a lot of cars, but not this damn many. Blue balloons littered the entrance to the house and that’s when I remembered that today was Maliah’s baby shower. Free had told me that Ghost volunteered to throw it for Staten, since everything happened with Chanel. I think he wanted to throw it more because he was not pleased at Chanel’s baby shower. I walked slowly into the house and declined the drink that was offered soon as I walked in. Everyone seemed to be enjoying everything. I slipped throughout the party looking for my sister. I spotted Maliah walking upstairs and followed her up there.

  “Liberty, Jesus, you scared the shit out of me,” she held her stomach and chest at the same time. “What are you doing here?”

  “I broke my engagement and have nowhere to live, so I came to talk to my sister. I had forgot your shower was today.”

  “Broke your engagement, huh?”

  “Yes, why you say it like that?”

  “You want Staten back.”

  “Are you asking me or telling me?”

  “I’m telling you. I know that the both of you crave each other. He doesn’t speak much on you, but I know he wants you more than anything, and I know you want him too.”

  “Don’t you have a little crush on him?”

  “Don’t do that, Liberty. I’m a grown woman carrying his baby. I know that you have his heart and no matter how cool, beautiful and how bomb sex is between us, I would never have his heart the way that you do.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “You’re fine. All I ask is that you respect me as his baby mother and love my son too. Me and Staten will remain friends while co-parenting our son.”

  “I can respect that.”

  “Go and get your man,” she smirked. “I have to pee so bad.”

  “Where is he?”

  “Should be downstairs in the theater room. The baby shower thing isn’t his thing, so he was watching Creed down there.”

  I jetted down the stairs and bumped into Free. She asked me something, but I was on a mission. She called behind me as I found the steps that led downstairs and to
ok them two at a time. I was quiet when I entered the theater. He was laid out in the middle chair with his hat pulled low over his eyes. I just knew he was asleep because he could never stay awake during a movie.

  “The fuck you standing over me for, Liberty?” I damn near jumped out my skin. Hell, I thought he was fast asleep.

  “I thought you were sleep.”

  “I was, but you breathing all fucking hard woke me up… What’s up?” he leaned up and removed his hat.

  “I don’t know how to say thi—”

  “Don’t start spilling your feelings like you did when you got out of rehab the first time. I don’t have time to deal with us getting back together, then you feeling a way and ending this. I’m tired of getting my heart broke, so if that’s what you on, go ahead and go back to your fiancé.”

  “I ended it with him. I wasn’t sure of anything in my entire life, but you, you make me feel so secure and sure of us. I push away because knowing how much I love you scares me. It’s easier to push you away and hide my feelings for you than to confront them head on,” I stopped and sat in the chair beside him. “I love you and I have never stopped loving you.”

  “You’re the most complicated, hard headed and weird ass person I have ever met,” he said and I dropped my head. “But, I think that’s the reason I love you. The way we vibe when we’re good is the reason I held out to hope that you would come back to me.”

  “I’m selfish, mean, distant and I’m a recovering drug addict. That’s enough to make any nigga go running, yet you always run toward me and choose me. I want to make this work. I want us to do this and grow from it.”

  “Lib, as much as I love you, I don’t want to jump into this with you again,” I put my head down, and he used his index finger to lift my head up. “Unless you’re all in with me. You gotta let me in. When you hide shit, I get suspicious and that’s when I act like your sober coach. I want to love you, not raise you or feel like I’m your father… feel me?”

  I nodded my head because I understood what he said. “I’m not perfect, but I promise that I’ll do better. I promise.”

  “And I’ll promise that I won’t be so hard on you. I’ll support, love and protect you with my heart, Liberty.”

  I climbed into the chair into his lap and he wrapped his arms around me. “I love you so much, Staten. I do.”

  “I love you too,” he kissed me on the forehead as we sat in the theater just taking in each other’s presence.

  Epilogue

  Six Months Later…

  Justice

  “Baby, look at the camera, look… okay, stand there… right there, right there, Gyson!” Free yelled as she directed him as she recorded a video.

  “Yo, ring that muthafucka to the bell drop on the floor. We’ll replace it!” Staten yelled, as we stood there waiting for Ghost to ring the remission bell. Everyone was here waiting to see what we all had been praying for.

  Ghost had taken his last round of chemo and was officially in remission. We all had tears in our eyes, but Staten had tears coming down his face as he cried and hung his arm around his brother. “Go uncle!” Kiki yelled as she clapped her hands.

  “Fuck that bitch ass cancer, thought he was going to take my brother, fuck that shit!” he sniffled.

  “I wanna thank you all for being there for me during this time. I know I couldn’t be the best brother, uncle, son or even husband because I was always sick, but y’all held it down for me and that’s what family is about. I’m happy to have all of you in my life and appreciate every one of you,” he said as he held onto the rope. “This is for you, Summer!” he looked up and rang the bell hard as fuck.

  Tears came down my eyes because we had prayed so hard for Ghost to beat this. These past few months had been hard as hell on all of us. Especially for Ghost and Free. Even with everything going on, he made sure he was there for everyone as much as he could. I loved how he loved my sister, and I loved how my sister loved him too. They weren’t perfect, lord knows they weren’t, still they were still worth it. I hugged Ghost as Free continued to record pictures.

  Me and Priest were still not together, but we were working on it. He was working hard as hell, as he should have. Priest wanted his family bad and I could tell from how hard he worked. I moved into the condo he bought me because whether I agreed with him or not, me and Yasmine needed to be safe. Priest didn’t spend the night or any of that. He came over to spend time with Yasmine if she wasn’t over his house. My education center opened, and all my time was spent there. It felt so good to teach again. I had been so occupied with other shit that I lost focus on my true love and that was teaching. I went to work every morning excited to help kids that needed it. Every day we had new parents signing their children up to come to our center. Even though I was single; I wasn’t looking or dating. I needed to fall in love with me again. Priest was still the love of my life and I was sure we would make it work down the line. Right now, I was focused on me and he understood that. Even though he didn’t spend the night, I did help myself to riding his dick after Yasmine went to bed. When Priest told me that he would never hurt me like that again, I believed him. Just because I believed he wouldn’t, didn’t mean that he still didn’t have to earn me back. All I could say, was pray for us. I was ready for baby two but wanted to wait until we were more stable before welcoming another baby into the mix.

  Lavern got back with her husband and made sure to send Priest a post card from Aruba. I was convinced that bitch was nuts. As much as Priest said she understood when they spoke, I don’t think it hit her. The only reason she got back with her husband was because she couldn’t have Priest. The phone calls did stop, and I was glad for that. She had been on my nerves with the damn phone calls and I was happy that Priest was able to get her to stop. Our daughter was so beautiful, healthy and sassy. She was the apple of our eyes and made me stop and thank God for such a precious gift. Her cute self was the reason I wanted a little brother or sister for her. Me and Priest made cute kids. Kiki ended up moving in with me. With Love running around loose and out of control, and Kiss trying to move in with Mirror, I needed to keep an eye on her. I homeschooled her at the center every day, and I had her back into dance along with therapy. Priest was happy that she moved with me because he just knew he was going to be next. And, boy was he wrong. If he wanted to move in together, I needed a commitment and a big ass house to match.

  Staten and Liberty were back together, and everyone was happy. Liberty was still clean. Liberty didn’t have anywhere to stay, so she was living with Free. Staten didn’t want to jump into living with each other right away, which I thought was smart. They didn’t need to be living together. Both of them were in couple’s therapy so they could learn how to deal with each other. Staten needed to learn how to be Liberty’s man and not her guardian, and Liberty had to learn how to be more opened and receptive to love when it was shown to her. Liberty eventually called Ty, and they were able to laugh about them getting married so soon. He wasn’t ready to be married and realized he loved being single and traveling the world. He even let her keep the ring and Staten took the shit and tossed it over a bridge when they drove to Brooklyn from Staten island. He replaced the ring with a promise ring. He told her he promised to love, protect and always honor her.

  Maliah had Shaolin Vero Davis. He was so handsome and this time he looked just like Staten. It was so weird how he had his same expressions and everything. You couldn’t tell Staten nothing about his son. Maliah, Liberty and Staten all had a good relationship. Liberty even picked Shaolin up when Maliah had to handle business. They all got along because they both knew their position. Maliah dropped that baby like it was nothing and got back to work. If possible, she was putting in more work than before she was pregnant. Messiah and Staten were back on speaking terms. As much as she hated their situation, she couldn’t ignore the fact that Staten was a good father and that he loved and cared for Maliah as his baby mother. As for Chanel, she got her wish… kinda.

  She
finally told Fat Tony that he was the father of Satin. He got a test and sure enough he was the father. He moved her out of her parent’s house into a townhouse she wanted, and then got her new jeep. She was rolling around in the same G wagon that Free was. The downside was that she was always second and so was Satin. Oh, and she had to fuck his fat greasy ass whenever he did come to visit her and their daughter. My hairstylist spilled all the tea on how Chanel hated being Fat Tony’s kept woman and that she didn’t want to fuck with him anymore but had nowhere to go. The dumb bunny quit her damn job, so she had to depend on his big ass. Staten hadn’t spoke to her since he left the restaurant. If it wasn’t about his son, Liberty or Maliah, he didn’t give a damn. Those three had built what Chanel couldn’t have had with Liberty. They actually co-existed and were able to have a healthy relationship with each other. It wasn’t for everybody, but it worked for them.

  Free and Ghost were planning baby number five sometime this year. Rain really wanted a baby sister, so they were going to try for a baby girl. Samoor’s heart condition was still something they battled, but baby boy was good. We would always worry about him because his heart condition was important. I was glad that some stress could finally come off of Free. She worried about Samoor and then Ghost. Now, she could focus strictly on Samoor and not stress herself out anymore. Our mama decided to sell her house and travel all over the world. It wasn’t a surprise because we knew she wasn’t happy just being a grandmother. Mama Rae had stepped in and became like a second mother for me. That woman didn’t know how much I appreciated her. As far as me and Liberty’s relationship, we were trying. That was all I could say. Not a day went by that I didn’t think about how I found her. We spoke more which was good. I saw her trying and I was proud of her. She volunteered down at the education center a few times a week. Staten told her she could go back to work, or she could work with him at the barbershop, and she chose to help him run the barbershop. I loved how patient and loving he was with her. It never changed, no matter how pissed she made him.