Waiting on Life

by Parker Williams

  Pete flopped onto the couch and wrapped his hands behind his head. “So what are you going to do?” he asked, eyeing me.

  “I guess I’m going to sit up tonight until he gets home.”

  “So you’re going to stalk him?”

  “No, of course—wait, am I stalking him?”

  That made him chuckle. “No, what you’re doing is trying to make sure he wasn’t hurt or offended by what I said. As long as you don’t sit at the peephole and stare out it while waiting, I don’t see a problem.” Pete gave a slight downturn of his lips. “Though maybe it would be better if you left a note on his door and let him know you’d like to talk to him? That way it’s not going to be creepy when you yank the door open and shock him.”

  Okay, that made sense. “Thanks. I wouldn’t have thought of it.”

  Pete mocked a punch to my arm. “You would have, but you’re not thinking clearly right now. This guy’s in your head, isn’t he?”

  “Yeah, maybe. I mean, I want to strip him down and lick him, but I also want to sit down and have a meal together, you know? Maybe I’m getting old, because my first thought isn’t to jump his bones.”

  “Or maybe you’ve finally met someone that you hope will see you for who you are.” Pete stretched and yawned. “I’m going to bed. Unless you want me to wait up with you.”

  “Nah, I’ll leave the note, then crash out on the couch. Go to sleep.”

  We stood and he hugged me tight. “Night.”

  I hastily scribbled a note, found a roll of scotch tape, and applied it to Toby’s door. Inside, I could hear mewing and a bit of whining. Another win for Toby. I adored cats. I went back into our place and closed the door, where I stretched out on the couch and hoped Toby would be willing to hear me out when he got home.

  Chapter Three

  Toby

  “Maybe if I go in and get down on the floor, Waldo will pounce and finish me off,” I muttered as I entered the vestibule of our building. It had been an ugly, ugly day, and I was exhausted. I tried to blot it out, but that wasn’t working. The guys missed Cary, that much was obvious. I fielded as many questions about why he wasn’t there as I did complaints about service. At least now I was home. Fourteen hours on my feet, followed by another four balancing the spreadsheets. Lucky me, I had to be up again in a few hours to start the whole process over. Worse still, I hadn’t had time to put any kind of feelers out there for workers, which meant more of the same until I had someone in and trained.

  My stack of mail held nothing but fliers and bills, so I left them in the mailbox, because I was too tired to worry about them right now. I dragged myself up the short flight of stairs that led to the elevator and pressed the button. As I waited for it to come down, I thought about my confrontation with my two wayward—and now one former—employees.

  Two days after they’d called off, leaving us in the shits, Scott and Donnie walked in, holding hands, laughing, and having a good time. They came around the side of the bar and headed toward the back.

  I stepped out and barred their path, my arms crossed over my chest. “Can I help you?”

  “I need to grab my apron,” Donnie said, his head cocked as he looked at me like I was stupid.

  “And I have to stock the bar.”

  “The bar is done, and your apron isn’t back there anymore. I’ve got your termination paperwork ready to be signed, and once that’s done, you’re out of here and not welcome on the premises anymore.”

  It was worth the price of admission to watch their expressions change. Scott’s was disbelieving. Donnie’s was just this side of pissed.

  Scott’s eyes went wide. “What? Why?”

  I’d heard stupid questions in the past, but this one? Oh, save me from people who think they know it all. “Seriously? You blew off a shift, the both of you, and left Cary to deal with the mess. What the hell did you think would happen when you came back?”

  They shared a look, and then Donnie glared at me. “We called.”

  “Five minutes before you were supposed to clock in. I get that emergencies happen, but five fucking minutes before you’re both supposed to start? Hell, you should have already been on the floor doing your prep work. No more. I can’t have the two of you working here, because you’re screwing up things for me.”

  “This is some bullshit,” Donnie muttered. “No big deal—this job sucked anyway.”

  “But….” Scott’s gaze darted from Donnie to me. His voice grew soft as a whisper. “I need this job.”

  “We’ll find another one.”

  “You might,” I admitted, turning my attention to Scott. “But he’s going to drag you down there too. You were a good server. The people here liked you. But as soon as you met—” I waved a hand, because really, I couldn’t even figure out what to call Donnie. “—this, you changed.”

  Donnie stormed over to me and stood with his face level with my chest, then reached out and locked his hand around my wrist. I had to hand it to him, he had balls. Pity he was about to lose them. I was grateful there wasn’t anyone in the bar yet, because shit was about to get ugly. Figuring Donnie had given me permission to retaliate, I grabbed him by the front of his shirt, spun him, and shoved him against the bar.

  “I get that you think you’re a big man. I understand that all the attention Scott pays you is heady, because you like that power over him. Guess what? When it comes to me, you got jack, little boy. You’re a scared child who needs to get his head out of his ass. Until you do, you’re always going to be a useless piece of shit, dragging down anyone who is in your orbit. Now I want you to turn your ass around and get the hell out of here.”

  I let him go and stifled a chuckle when he all but collapsed onto the floor. He got up, doing his best to show he wasn’t afraid of me, but after years of dealing with people, you learn to spot the tic in the eye, the lick of a tongue over dry lips, the catch of a breath. He was fucking terrified.

  “Go on now before you piss your pants. I don’t feel like cleaning up any more of your messes.”

  “C’mon, Scott. Let’s go.”

  Scott’s gaze stayed locked on mine. He was trying to make a decision, and he was silently pleading with me to make it for him. I hadn’t lied. Scott was great as a server, even the times when he’d been behind the bar. He’d just gotten mixed up with this dung heap of a boyfriend.

  “You dump him, you stay. You keep him, you go. The choice is that simple. You need to know, though, you’re going to have to get back into my good graces, and that’s not going to be easy.”

  Donnie snorted. “What? You gonna make him suck your dick?”

  I leveled a glare at the little bastard. I really wanted to throw him out, but I needed Scott to choose where his loyalties lay first. “Why are you still here?”

  “Scott?”

  “You go ahead, Donnie.” Scott sighed, and his gaze dropped to the floor. “I don’t think we should see each other anymore.”

  “What the fuck?” Donnie rounded on Scott. “You fucking suck, man. You’re a loser.”

  “Sticks and stones, little boy.” I stepped closer to Scott, because I knew what was about to happen. Donnie raised a fist and lashed out at Scott, but I grabbed Donnie’s arm and stopped him cold. Then, for emphasis, I squeezed it until he shrieked. He was lucky I didn’t grab my knife, because I would have gutted him and told the cops it was self-preservation. I shoved him back, grinning when he stumbled over a chair and slammed to the floor. He glared up at me, like I should be intimidated by someone eight inches shorter and sixty pounds lighter. Besides, if the knife didn’t work, I had the gun stashed by the register. “Now get out. Stay away from Scott and from the bar. The next time I see you, I won’t be so nice.”

  Donnie scrambled to his feet. “Useless faggot,” he snarled, his gaze locked on Scott.

  Scott shrunk in on himself. He wrapped his arms around his waist and rocked on his heels. It was then that I understood. Since I’d met him, I had known Scott wanted to be loved, and he was willi
ng to do what it took to find it. Apparently that even included being treated like crap by this degenerate. He’d been servicing Donnie, hoping that one day Donnie would turn around and say the words Scott had been desperate to hear. Instead, Donnie was using Scott for sex, and probably for money and a place to crash.

  I gripped Scott by the shoulder, forcing him to look up. The mocha depths of his eyes said more than any words Scott could ever speak. “You don’t live with Donnie anymore.” Fuck him if he thought he was going to hurt a sweet kid like Scott. I spun to face Donnie. “Have your shit out before he gets home.”

  “Fuck you! You don’t tell me what to do.”

  Oh yeah. I’d had it with this piece of garbage.

  I stomped toward him and grabbed the front of his shirt, then lifted him off his feet. I brought him up so we were eye level, and there was the tiniest bit of terror there. I liked it. “I do tell you what to do. You wanna stay safe and healthy, I strongly suggest you listen to my advice, because I got friends who know where to put bodies so they’ll never be found.”

  Donnie swallowed hard. “Fine.”

  I dropped him because I was an asshole and wanted to. He landed in a heap on the floor, but got to his feet quickly, probably expecting me to kick him while he was down. I chastised myself for not thinking about doing that.

  “I can’t believe you’re going to side with this fucker over me.” Then Donnie turned and stormed out the door.

  When I glanced at Scott, there were tears in his eyes.

  “I’m sorry.”

  I reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. “I know. You were caught up in a pretty man who said the right things to you. He made you feel special, but now you’ve realized he was using you. Right?”

  Scott gave a sharp nod. “I thought he cared about me.” His lip trembled. “Guess I’m just as stupid as he always said I was, huh?” He shuffled toward the door. “I’m sorry. I’ll get out of the way.”

  Oh, Scott. He reminded me of Cary. Both were great workers, but unlike Cary, Scott was desperate to find someone who would care for him. He wasn’t homely, but he wasn’t a stunning beauty. What he lacked in looks, he more than made up for in personality. He was way too sweet to just let walk off. Or maybe it was that I was too much of a sucker. Probably both.

  “We’re low on Miller. When you get a uniform from the storeroom, grab a case and bring it up front.”

  He stopped and turned to face me. There was hope there, and I wasn’t about to quash it. “But you said—”

  “That we’re low on Miller.”

  He gave a hesitant smile, and I had to make sure he got what I had to say to him.

  “I don’t give second chances, Scott. Do you understand what I’m telling you?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  I folded my arms over my chest. “Good. Now explain it to me.”

  His throat worked when he swallowed hard. He stood ramrod straight, his chin up. “I shouldn’t have done what I did. I wanted so bad for Donnie to like me, I let him pull me away from my responsibilities. You trusted me, and I broke that bond. I swear to you, I’ll work hard to prove that you can depend on me.”

  That was all I needed to hear. “Go get dressed. We’re going to be busy tonight.”

  His stony expression softened. “Toby, I… I’m sorry.”

  I did my best to give him a smile. “We’re good. But remember, I don’t do second chances. This is the only one I’m giving you.”

  “But… you just gave me a second chance.”

  I clapped him on the shoulder. “No, I didn’t. You earned it, and now it’s up to you if you’re going to be a man of your word.”

  “Are you going up?”

  I startled, which didn’t happen often. The woman standing there glaring at me was five feet nothing, and it amused me. Not enough to forego the apology she had coming.

  “Sorry. Long day, and I’m asleep on my feet.” I got in, and she let go of the door. I reached out and pressed the button. “Thank you for holding the elevator.”

  “No problem. I figured you needed it.”

  We said nothing else until the doors opened and I stepped out. “Thanks again.”

  She gave me a nod, then reached for the button. The door whooshed closed, and I turned back toward the long hall that would lead to my apartment. Normally it was just a few steps, but at this moment, it seemed like it was still miles away. Though I was only thirty-two, today my body ached enough to let me know what to expect when I hit sixty. My knees popped with each step, my feet protested, and my head throbbed. To make it even better, my stomach was growling, reminding me I hadn’t had time to eat.

  I stopped outside the apartment, listening for Waldo’s dissatisfaction, but I heard nothing. It worried me that I was more afraid of this Waldo than the one who was constantly nagging me for more food. Withdrawing my key from my pocket, I was ready to slip it into the lock when the piece of paper caught my attention. I pulled it down and had just started to read it when a voice from behind me scared the crap out of me.

  Kyle

  I’d been dozing on the couch when I heard the groan. I leaped up and jammed my eye against the peephole, hoping to hell that it was Toby. When I saw it was, my heart did a little flip. Just as quickly, though, it sank. He was exhausted, that much was easy to tell. He had his head against his door as he was trying to get his key into the lock, and he seemed to be in pain. I yanked open my door.

  “Toby!”

  He whirled around, his eyes wide, and I regretted my loudness, especially at almost four in the morning.

  “You scared the crap out of me,” he grumbled. “What do you want?”

  Okay, so he was pissed. I couldn’t blame him, I guess.

  “Pete’s sorry he was stupid when you talked. He was flustered and… are you hungry?”

  He scowled. “No, I’m tired. Gonna go in, feed my cat, and then crawl into a shower before I hit the pillow. See ya.”

  I knew if I let him go, I would regret it. Toby seemed the type who would hold a grudge and let it harden his heart. He turned back to the door and unlocked it. The moment he pushed it open, I made a decision. I followed him into the apartment.

  “What the fuck? Get out.”

  “No, because I think if I walk away now, you’re not going to listen to me the next time we see each other. Please, just give me five minutes, and I’ll get out of your… well, hair.”

  At that moment, a big cat appeared out of nowhere and plopped down in front of Toby, throwing its feet in the air.

  He bent down, groaning as he did, and stroked a hand over the cat’s belly. “I’m sorry, buddy. I did warn you it was going to be a long day. Until I find someone to serve at the bar, I’m going to be late every night.”

  He needed help? I needed a job! We were perfect for each other.

  “How about this. You go take a shower, and I’ll throw you together something to eat. If you tell me where the cat’s food is, I’ll get… what’s his name?”

  “Waldo, and I told you, get out.”

  The smart move would be to go, but Mama never once told me I was smart. In fact, she told me more than once it was a good thing I was pretty, because I would need to find a man who would take care of me. What did she know?

  “You’re dead on your feet, your cat needs food, and I can hear your stomach begging for something to eat.” I did my best to turn on the charm. “Let me help you, okay? Then, if you don’t want to talk to me, I’ll leave.”

  He was too tired to argue, I’m sure.

  “Fine, whatever. I need sleep, and I just can’t get into it right now. Food is in the cabinet above the refrigerator. I’ll be out in five or ten minutes.”

  “Make it ten. I’ll have you something ready when you come out, okay?”

  He grumbled and waved a dismissive hand before he headed toward the back of the apartment.

  As soon the soft snick of the door closing hit me, I got down to business. I had to show Toby that I was a good bet for the se
rver’s job. First thing I did was open the refrigerator, which turned out to be a big mistake. It was pretty much a barren wasteland, which wasn’t surprising if he was putting in a lot of hours. He had butter and some cool-looking bottles of craft beer. Hardly enough for a meal. I dashed across the hall and grabbed some of Pete’s vegan ham, eggs, cheese, and bread, then hurried back to Toby’s place. I found a pan and put a dollop of butter into it. While it melted, I whipped the eggs. Once that was done, I poured them in and let them snap, crackle, and pop in the hot butter. Then I smeared more on a couple slices of bread.

  While that was cooking, I found Waldo’s food and tugged the lid off the can, then poured it into the dish near the refrigerator. When I turned, he was staring up at me.

  “Hope you don’t mind that I’m not Toby.” I stood up as he dove into it. “Guess not.”

  The eggs were done, so I placed a few slices of sharp cheddar over them and let it melt a bit, then put the bread in another pan before I set the flame to medium to grill it. Meanwhile, I heated the ham in the egg pan, then slid it onto the bread and grilled it for a few moments. As soon as one side was done, I flipped it, added the eggs, and let it finish cooking.

  The door down the hall opened, and Toby came stumbling out. He saw me and groaned.

  When I looked up, I found him standing there, a big blue robe wrapped around his beefy goodness. His skin glowed in the light above the table. There was no doubt about it at all. Toby was a beautiful man.

  “Why are you still here?”

  And maybe a bit of a hard nut to crack. Instead of answering, I plated up his sandwich and put it on the table, then snagged a beer from the refrigerator and popped the top. I set that on the table beside his food.

  He eyed the plate curiously. “Unless you laid those yourself….”

  “I went to my place and grabbed them.” I took a deep breath. “Look, I know that Pete said something stupid, but—”