To Find a God

by Mary Hamilton

  Virgil smirked. “I don’t know, this one seemed to die easily enough.”

  “Yes. I suppose so. But likely he wasn’t expecting an interruption. He came for me in the middle of the night. There should have been no reason for him to anticipate resistance, especially from someone like Jarek.” CeCe turned to the Azyrean. “I mean no offense. It’s just that you don’t appear especially threatening.”

  Commander West stood and strode to the door, turning to face the gathering. “This changes things. I knew that Wyndred would not be happy with your failure. But to send an assassin into our camp to kill you, that signals that you are somehow more important to him than I thought.” She narrowed her eyes and rubbed her chin. “This also puts all of our band at risk. You no longer have the option of remaining silent. I must insist that you take a more active role in our opposition to the king.”

  “I accept that he is not my friend or benefactor. I will help you as I can.” She stood and strode over, her face less than a half meter from West’s. “But let us be honest. He is my enemy and he is your enemy. And I will do my part. But don’t delude yourself that the enemy of my enemy is necessarily my friend. There remains blood between us. I will never forget that.”

  It was the commander’s turn to shrug. “The future will bring what it brings. I’m not asking you to like me. We share a common foe. Each of us does what we must in that regard.”

  CeCe nodded. “What do you wish of me?”

  West smiled. “As you may have noticed, Jarek is with us. You can probably guess, I didn’t ask him here as a formality. He has questions, the answers to which I believe can help us bring an end to Wyndred’s evil. It may well be that these answers lie outside the camp, in which case I will have to send Master Whit out into the world again, risking both his life and the lives of my people. But maybe you can fill in a few blanks for us before we take that step.”

  CeCe turned to Jarek. “Okay. What is it you want to know?”

  Chapter 19: Jarek

  The commander’s words caught Jarek off guard. In fact, he assumed that his being there was more or less a formality—kind of a reward for his role in the fight. Still, he did have questions. “I guess, first… do you know anything about the king looking for crystals? Exactly what is he looking for and why?”

  CeCe considered the Azyrean for a moment. “As for the why, I couldn’t say. I actually heard more from you and Burns than I ever heard from any of the king’s men. As to ‘what’ he’s looking for—you said it yourself—he’s searching for crystals and information about crystals. That’s all we were told.”

  Jarek’s mind raced. “Okay then. I assume that he’s interested in red crystals, right?” It only made sense. After all, the red moonbeams held the key to moving into this human realm. So, it seemed logical that they would enable one to move outside the area as well.”

  “No. I don’t recall any specific interest in red crystals. For a while, we were trying to locate a source of green ones. And we found a mine to the west that had some, but nothing that seemed large enough, or at least that was the objection I heard. Then, after a while, everything was about blue crystals. And we needed to find really big ones. Again, the reasons were not given to me.”

  And then, there it was, as clear as day. Jarek stood and began pacing. “Of course. I should have seen it all along. The red beams lead to this land. But the king and his men are already here. They have no need of red crystals. The color of crystal is related to the destination. So, a green beam leads to some other place. And the same for blue. Well, a different place.” He turned to CeCe. “Where do the blue beams go?”

  She smirked. “How should I know? I just looked for the crystals. I don’t know for sure that the beams, if there are any, go anywhere.”

  Jarek shook his head. “That has to be it. The color of the beams, hence the color of the crystal that produces it, relates to where the user wants to go. So, we need to find out where the blue and the green beams lead.”

  West, silent until now, weighed in. “That doesn’t make any sense. A beam doesn’t go anywhere. I mean, we could create a beam in here and it would end at the wall. There has to be more to it than that.”

  Jarek reached up and scratched an ear. This was a puzzlement. “True. But on Pangrove, we rode the beams and we ended up here. A beam is what brought me.”

  Silence—all eyes were on Jarek.

  “Wait a minute. Maybe… it could be that when we got on a moonbeam, it somehow interacted with something else that transported us.” He recalled the portals that formed at the base of the hill—the ones that the kids took to get back to the top. “What if a beam of light, say white light, is passed through a colored crystal, creating a colored beam that ends up making a portal. But that would require a really large crystal.”

  CeCe responded, “And that’s what the king was looking for.”

  Jarek grew excited. “Yes, that’s it. He needs large blue crystals to create the blue portals that will allow people to enter and be transported to… uh… we still don’t know where, though.”

  “I can’t help you there.”

  “I know. Maybe Doc can help us. Perhaps something in the lore or stories will give us a clue as to where the blue portals might lead.” Jarek’s mind raced. He would talk to the medic as soon as he left this meeting. He started to excuse himself but thought of something else. “What do you know of Aristan?”

  He watched CeCe wince at the mention of the name. It had struck a nerve.

  West prodded, “CeCe?”

  “That name is not spoken aloud in this realm.”

  Virgil rejoined the conversation, “Why not?”

  “Because the king wills it so. I don’t know the reason. But I witnessed, one day, a young man preaching about Aristan in the city square, right in the center of Ebon Lake. That was in the morning. By afternoon, he was nowhere to be found. To my knowledge, the preacher was never seen again.”

  Jarek said, “But, have you ever heard of Aristan, other than the prohibition?”

  CeCe answered tentatively, softly, “I heard the tales as a child—the god of the humans.”

  “Do you know anything about a group of priests or something like that?”

  “Not directly. But we were ordered to be always alert to anyone speaking about Aristan. Oh, one other thing—the old monastery you visited, it is forbidden for humans to go there. Patrols roam that area from time to time and are under orders to capture anyone in the area and return them to the castle.”

  Virgil winced at the news. “They ever capture anyone?”

  “Don’t know. I never heard of any.”

  More silence, broken by Commander West. “Anything else, Jarek?”

  The Azyrean thought through what he had heard. “Not right now.”

  “Very well. Master Whit, I do want to impress upon you, though, things have become more urgent. We need those answers, sooner rather than later.”

  Jarek nodded and was about to leave, when CeCe addressed him. “Jarek, I again thank you for your actions. I am in your debt.” She paused and lowered her gaze. “I also wanted you to know that, what I did before—I never meant for you to be harmed. I really thought that the king would treat you well. I am sorry.”

  Chapter 20: Marzi

  Marzi found herself once again seated across the table from Ariessa and the High Council. This time, Saryn and Arien sat to her right. She had never realized that silence could be so thundering, so overpowering. At least she had learned to remain silent during these episodes.

  Finally, Ariessa cleared her throat and spoke, her gaze slowly shifting between the three guests. “You’ve returned. I am grateful that you had a safe journey.” Her gaze rested briefly on her daughter and she appeared ready to say something personal. But after a moment, she turned her attention to Saryn.

  “Welcome to the Bough.” A hint of a sad smile touched her lips. “I see much of your mother in you.”

  The comment took Marzi aback. Who was his mother? />
  “Thank you.” He bowed his head in obvious respect. “She sends her regards and regrets that she could not attend.”

  Ariessa returned his gesture and continued, “I understand that you intend to journey to the frost elves. Saige has agreed to this?” She arched the brow over her right eye.

  “Not exactly, but these are extraordinary times, Empress, and I believe that she will come around.”

  “Indeed.” Ariessa glanced at Arien, but she returned her attention to Saryn. “I trust that you will remain with us here for a few days—an opportunity to gather supplies and rest. You are extended every courtesy. If there is something specific you need, please ask.” She lowered her head for a moment. “You must be weary from your journey.”

  “Yes, we are, and thank you. We happily accept your kind generosity.” Arien nodded her assent. She seeemd unable to take her eyes from her mother.

  Marzi suddenly realized that this was a mother-daughter reunion ten years in the making. And yet, nothing had passed between the two, at least nothing that the Azyrean could discern. How could Ariessa just sit there and say nothing? Do nothing? This was her only child. She hadn’t seen Arien since….

  Ariessa said, “Thank you all, I would ask for a few minutes before we reconvene please.” She stood, her eyes glistening.

  Everyone else in the room stood as well. Marzi and Saryn turned to leave, but Arien remained still, facing her mother. The council members found their way around the table and moved discreetly out the door. Marzi expected the mother and daughter to embrace, to show some joy, something. When I get home… if I get home, it’s not going to be like this. She so wanted her mother to hold her tightly, to caress her face, and to kiss her head. Tears came but Marzi wiped them away with her sleeve. Just before she tore her gaze away from the reunion, Marzi saw Ariessa put her arms out toward her daughter. “Come on, Saryn, let’s go.”

  As they moved out onto the outside platform, they found the council members, along with Ryshara, Ellemareth, and Ran waiting. Marzi knew what came next. Her three friends would be called to account for their actions. Presumably, this would occur after Ariessa and Arien were finished.

  Lothran touched Marzi’s shoulder. “It is good to see you again, truly. You know where our home is. Make yourselves comfortable.” He gestured with his head inside toward Arien, then continued, “Ryshara and I will be there shortly.”

  “Thank you.” It felt surprisingly good, almost like a homecoming. And it was good to hear Lothran’s voice. She wondered whether this would be the closest thing she ever had to a family again.

  Saryn’s voice interrupted her reflection. “And I also offer my gratitude, Lord Lothran.” He nodded in respect, a gesture returned by Ryshara’s father.

  From inside, Ariessa’s voice rang out, “Please, let us reconvene.”

  Marzi started across the skybridge, calling over her shoulder, “This way. We can get something to eat at Lord Lothran’s while we wait for him and Rys.”

  ◆◆◆

  “What was the Empress talking about earlier? Who is your mother?” Marzi had waited until she and Saryn were inside Lothran’s home.

  “I’m surprised that you had not deduced that. Saige is my mother.”

  And suddenly, it was clear as day. The bond between the two had been obvious. But more importantly, Saryn had been the only one who seemed capable of standing his ground with the leader of the cliff cave elves. Everyone else seemed to defer without question. And, when Saige backed out of her agreement, Saryn dropped into her place, seemingly without effort. Of course. I should have seen that. “Is that why you are here? She wouldn’t come, and it fell to you?” But why would he have kept it a secret? “And why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Why didn’t I tell you? Mostly because I have a role to fill at the cliffs. I cannot be seen as taking advantage of my relationship with my mother. I must make my own way. As for why I’m here, it is complicated, Marzi. You see only what you have dropped into the middle of. We at the cliffs, as well as those in the Bough, look at these things with the perspective of time and past events. Both sides feel as though they were betrayed by the other. Neither is particularly trusting. If we are to weather the coming darkness, some of us must step up and build bridges. I fear, Marzi, that you have a long road ahead of you.”

  Marzi shrugged. “At least I won’t be traveling it alone.” She offered a terse chuckle.

  “That you will not, my friend. That you will not.”

  Marzi pulled out some bread and jam, along with a pitcher of freshly made talonberry nectar, and the two ate in relative silence. The enormity of the task ahead of her was only then beginning to register. Mindlessly focusing on the food in front of her seemed the best way to deal with it, at least for the moment.

  Lothran and Ryshara arrived about an hour later. Lothran’s face was lined with worry and offered little more than a nod as he entered the space. Ryshara followed him in, downcast and silent as well.

  Marzi sprang up and went over to greet her friend. “What happened? What did they say?”

  Rys smiled weakly. “We can talk later. I need to prepare dinner.”

  “Where are Ran and Elle?”

  “They are at their own homes.” Marzi noticed a sadness in Ryshara’s eyes, but it was with a resignation that said, “We will speak of this later.”

  Chapter 21: Marzi

  “What happened? What did Ariessa say?” Marzi had struggled through dinner to contain her curiosity and honor Ryshara’s desire to avoid the conversation. But once they were alone on the sky terrace, the Azyrean could wait no longer.

  “Nothing unexpected.” Rys sat in the hanging chair, gazing out at the plant lights that shone with soft blue and white.

  Marzi planted herself in front of her friend and pleaded. “But what? Everything’s going to be all right, isn’t it?”

  Sadness tinged her smile and her brilliant blue eyes sparkled in the dim light. “You must understand, we—Elle, Ran, and I—we made a decision. And I believe, as do my friends, that it was a good decision. But we live in a world of rules and we knew that. Part of growing up is learning to accept responsibility. So, we can say that we accomplished what we set out to do. And now it is time to face what comes of that decision.”

  “But it’s not fair!” And, in that instant, Marzi remembered that she’d uttered those same words to her mother that last night in Pangrove. It had been a childish argument. And, after all she’d experienced, here she was resorting to the same approach. She lowered her head. “I’m sorry. I know it’s more complicated than that. And I know you’re trying to do the right thing.” And then it dawned on her that Rys still hadn’t related the actual consequences. “But what happened?”

  “In accordance with our laws, we are banished.”

  Marzi started to explode once again but checked herself. “What does that mean? You are gone forever, from your home and father, just like that?”

  Rys offered a laugh that seemed genuine in its mirth. “No. Nothing is forever. We are dark elves and absent something far more serious, we would never be separated permanently.” The chuckle became a warm smile. “We are banished to the north for a period of three years—one year for each of us in the party. After that, we will return to the Bough and rejoin life here.”

  “Three years? That’s so long.” Marzi struggled to accept that the council would go along with that. After all, Lothran, her father, was a part of it. Did he agree with the sentence?

  “In the life of an elf, three years is not so long. And we will not be alone. They are my best friends. And, if you recall, Lord Rintaur is also somewhere to the north.” The laugh returned. “It will be like a small elven community up there. It will also be a chance for us to reflect and grow. I do not see this as punishment, but rather an opportunity to experience something else.”

  Marzi started to ask if she would be allowed to go along and stay with them. But things were indeed complicated. She had her own task set before her. And after t
hat, home is where she needed to be. But what about her friends? Why did she keep losing those she cared about? “How long before you have to leave?”

  “Three days. We are allowed that much to gather our belongings and say our goodbyes. Things are not always as bad as they may seem. Sometimes, in the deep of night, life seems impossible. But when the sun rises, hope returns.”

  The Azyrean gazed in wonderment at her friend. Rys wasn’t that much older than she was. And yet, she seemed.... Marzi struggled for the right word. How did Ryshara seem? Noble, good, wise, and, yes, at peace. I want to be like that.

  “Marzi, I have been meaning to ask you what has become of your predicament? What consequences has the empress passed down?”

  “I will tell you later.”

  A voice from the doorway had interrupted them. Marzi was secretly happy when she saw Lothran walk in. “Marzi, I needed to tell you before I retire, Ariessa would like to speak with you in the morning.”

  “Okay. What’s it about?”

  “I do not know.” He paused and gazed at his daughter. “Good night to both of you.”

  “Wait.” Ryshara stood, walked over, and put her arms around his neck, holding him tightly. Marzi watched the scene with a strange mix of joy and sadness. Lothran’s arms wrapped around his daughter and together they stood in the soft blue light. “Father, please do not be troubled. You did what you had to do; all will be fine.”

  ◆◆◆

  “I do not know. It does not seem like such a big deal to me.” Ran passed the sharpening stone repeatedly over his sword’s edge. “It is not like we have not spent time away from the Bough. And I hear that hunting is good up north. They have huge stags and tundra boars there. None of these puny forest deer.”

  Marzi had taken an early morning walk in the forest beneath the Bough and encountered the young warrior beside a stream. “But won’t you miss everyone in the Bough?”