“What? On The Strip?” Steve gave that vacant look.
Josh didn’t bother to explain. It wasn’t swimming nor the swimwear that mattered. In a town with many pools, public and private, one needn’t go to the Pyramid to swim. One went there to be seen and to see, not the new bathing suit but what was in it, likewise, to show off a new boyfriend or husband or maybe to find one.
“I can’t decide.” Josh fumbled through the stack.
Steve gave him that look again, not the vacant one, but the Tuesday face. Today was Sunday, tomorrow Monday, and the next day, Tuesday.
“What’s sexy?” Josh asked.
Steve wore lime green trunks with yellow seahorses. “For me, it’s this. For you, it could be just about anything.”
“A speedo of course. The polka dots?” Josh asked.
“The pink one?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Love it,” Steve said.
They took the car, because of the heat. As the saying went, you could fry an egg on the sidewalk. Steve cranked up the air conditioning as they rode down Paradise, not much traffic on a Sunday afternoon.
The valet took the keys by the hotel entrance, and Steve watched until the car disappeared. Josh scowled at him, and Steve didn’t notice. He must love that car. Must be nice to be the object of his affection.
Josh followed him through the lobby door on the way to the pool. Arriving guests stood in long lines at the front desk. Bellmen scurried with luggage-stacked carts.
In the wake of the bellmen’s burdens, crowds parted for Steve. He stood out in his flowered sarong. Josh wore one, too, to match, but a different top. He found it in his uncle’s drawer, while looking for the ring. It was an old-school tank top undershirt with light-weight ribbed fabric, almost sheer. Likely white when new, it aged to a subtle yellow. Steve looked at it askance.
Josh caught Steve’s disparaging glance and didn’t appreciate it. Steve had a lot of nerve, considering what he wore. A tank top, also, but too narrow to cover more than his navel. Like a thong for the chest, it made one wonder why Steve bothered with it, except to draw attention to what it poorly hid. One would think with his show he got enough of that kind of attention.
Maybe too old for this scene, Josh wished they’d stayed home, just the two of them, where they would wear something more comfortable. Well, what they wore now was comfortable, but it wasn’t what they wore around the house. At home they weren’t concerned about impressing strangers.
His reservations increased as they approached the cabana, a large bed surrounded by a canvas tent next to the pool. Steve pointed it out from across the water. A group of kids, barely drinking age, lounged on the mattress. “Who are they?” Josh asked. “Where are your friends?”
Steve didn’t hesitate. “That’s them.”
“Those are your friends?” Josh asked.
“Yeah, why?”
“They look young.”
“What’s wrong with that?” Steve asked.
“They’re kids.”
“Not much younger than you.”
This could have been a compliment for Josh, but he wasn’t sure. Just a few years, but important ones, made him old enough to call them kids.
He walked to the other side of the pool with Steve, who introduced him. Gregory was a stagehand at Steve’s show. His boyfriend just graduated from the university. Paul and Tony had office jobs in real estate, one with a title closer and the other with a mortgage company. That’s how Steve knew them. He didn’t say how he met Chris, the odd man out.
“When did you get in town?” Steve asked.
Chris smeared suntan lotion on his chest. “I missed you. Back please.” He handed Steve the tube, turned away from him, and peeked over a shoulder. Steve applied the lotion and took a little longer than necessary in the judgment of Josh, who gave an incredulous look. Steve ignored it, too busy.
When every inch was covered, Steve returned the tube, and Chris rambled on about a minor role in a film. He would wrap it up in Cabo next month. If Josh had to envision a movie star, it would be Chris, blond hair, bleached from the look of it, tall, almost taller than Steve, shoulders too broad and hips unnaturally thin. It was disgusting.
“Are you sure you didn’t miss a spot?” Chris asked.
Josh was quite sure that Steve didn’t.
Not enough room for everyone on this mattress, and all the other cabanas and lounge chairs occupied around the pool, Josh spread his towel on the deck beside the bed. At least the tent provided some shade. He sat and yanked at Steve’s trunks. “Sit with me.”
“I’m getting a drink. Rum and coke?” Steve asked.
“Water.” In this heat, Josh was parched.
Steve turned to Chris. “What do you want?”
“I’ll get it.” Chris sidled up much too close to Steve.
They ran off before Josh could suggest an alternative. He should have trusted his instincts and made Steve stay home. Now he sat on the ground alone next to Steve’s friends on the bed, who were little more conversant than four fresh-picked peaches.
It escaped him at first what exactly it was that clued him in to their age. Of the few words they spoke, he’d heard some of them before, while certain terms puzzled him. Though not his native language, he spoke English every day from childhood and had never encountered these expressions. To ask their meaning might appear obtuse and out of touch.
A lot happened in ten years or so. Josh admired their cheeks, both the ones above and below. Steve’s butt still had more lift than all of theirs combined, but their faces possessed that weightless quality of youth. The flesh floated in air, full and round, helium expanding upward. Not a fine line nor wrinkle in sight, he wished he could say that about himself and Steve, whose hairline receded a bit.
Steve’s lower eyelids hollowed a little and hinted at creases when he smiled. Minor changes but telling, and though in excellent shape, he’d lost that certain litheness of youth, which these boys exhibited.
Josh could use a drink of water now and wondered what took so long. Hot, he decided to get in the pool. Paul and Tony joined him. They asked about his show. Gregory and his boyfriend stayed behind on the bed, where they made out, perhaps another reason Paul and Tony left.
They got in the pool. It was packed. Rather than a soup, now it was more like a beef stew with dumplings. Standing shoulder to shoulder in the crowd, no swimming happened here, just mixing. They chatted as a cocktail waitress passed on the deck. “Can I have a sparkling water?” Josh asked. She made a note as she walked off.
“Was that really you?” Tony asked. He’d seen the show.
“I’m the only trapeze artist.”
“Wild. That flip in the air took my breath away.”
“That’s the idea.”
“You do it every day?” Paul asked.
“Except on Tuesdays.”
“What do you do on Tuesday?”
“Trade secret. Where’s Steve?” Josh looked around for him. “Do you see him?”
“He said he was getting a drink,” Tony said.
“Long line at the bar,” Paul said.
“How do you guys know Chris?” Josh asked.
“He’s Steve’s friend.”
“How did they meet?”
“Maybe The Pariah.”
The cocktail waitress came back. Josh pulled a credit card out of the pocket inside his speedo and handed it to her. With the tips of her long shiny nails, she shook the card, like she didn’t want to touch it, and in a moment, it dried in the torrid air.
The card slipped into the little machine. “Add a tip?” she asked. “I’d let you do it, but you’re wet.”
“Sure, twenty percent, thanks.” He was dehydrated.
She gave him back the card with a plastic cup of bubbly water. Josh sipped, and by contrast to his surroundings, it hit him like an arctic chill in those cold Canadian winters as a boy. Not so long ago, but he’d come far since Paul and Tony’s age. No wonder they seemed like kids to him.
A
tap on his shoulder, he turned around. Steve, in the pool, handed him another cup of water. Josh gulped the rest of the first cup and dropped the second cup inside it.
“Thanks. What took so long? Where’s Chris?”
Steve didn’t answer. The boys got out and went back to the bed, now empty. Maybe Gregory and his friend read their minds and got a room. Josh and Steve leaned against the side of the pool and put their drinks on the deck.
“Sorry it took so long,” Steve said. “Are you having fun?”
“Not so much since I was a kid. Where are your adult friends?”
“Huh?”
“Your friends our age?” Josh asked.
“They’re all at home, married, boring.”
“That’s the way I want to be.”
“There’s plenty of time for that later,” Steve said.
“Where’s Chris? Off to Cabo?”
“I don’t know. I can’t keep up with him.”
“Do you want to?”
“Not when I have you.”
Chapter 37
On Tuesday when the show was dark, Josh swung by his hands on the trapeze. It was just a warm-up, but he wore the safety harness anyway. Its rope suspended from the ceiling. If he fell, it would catch him.
At the top of the arc, he peeked down past his toes. Dr. Brinkwater, Steve, and Dan looked up at him. Descending again, he reached the bottom of his semi-circular path. There for a moment, the volume dialed up on the music. The melody changed key. It might have been his imagination, but gravity’s tug on him waned.
At that point on the arc where the descent ended and the rise began, time stopped, and the pull of gravity ceased. He entered an eternity, and when it passed, the anomaly faded.
His heart pounded. Motion had slowed there, not only the swing but his pulse. Though strong, the beats stretched out.
He rose and fell again. As the nadir reapproached, he recaptured the lost time. The swing hastened upward, and his heartbeat raced.
He landed on the platform, detached the safety rope, and climbed down the ladder. Dr. Brinkwater met him on stage and pulled him aside. From the front row, Steve and Dan looked on.
She touched his elbow. “How was it?”
“The deep breathing and meditation helped. I did the stretching exercises, but I do those anyway. I’m sure that helps too. I wasn’t afraid. Of course, I have the safety rope and can’t fall. The stagehand checked it out.”
Her eyebrows narrowed as she peered at him. “No anxiety at all? What about when you and Steve were together? None then?”
“No, I have the safety rope. What’s to worry about?”
“Josh, do you believe in the curse? What would your uncle say?”
“He’ll tell you. We can go back.” Just as Josh had feared, Alfonso hadn’t said a word that morning when Dr. Brinkwater was there.
“When was the last time he spoke to you?” She tilted her head. “He didn’t seem conversant.”
“I don’t really believe it. It’s just a phobia.”
“But you’re not afraid.”
“Not with the harness. Why should I be?”
“Were it a phobia, you would.”
He glanced back, and Steve smiled at him from the front row. Dr. Brinkwater cleared her throat.
Josh turned to her. “The relaxation worked. There was one point when I felt something strange. It might have been nerves or just my imagination.”
“Are you ready to go without the rope?”
His spine tightened. “No.”
“Then what do you want to do?”
“I love flying. With the harness, I’m safe. I want to go up again.”
Dr. Brinkwater turned to Dan. “Start the music from the beginning when he signals you?” Dan got up and walked to the back of the house.
On the way to the ladder, Josh took in Steve’s solemn expression and gave him a reassuring smile. There wasn’t anything to worry about, though it occurred to Josh the ladder rose forty feet, and the safety harness was at the top. He should be concerned, maybe, but he’d never heard of anyone falling on ascent. Nonetheless, he took care with every step and with each grip all the way up.
On the platform, he put on the harness, pulled the safety rope out of the way behind him, and waved at Dan to begin. The music pulsed. Trapeze in hand, he swung up to the top of the arc and back again.
Suspended from a mechanism overhead, the platform where he’d started lowered five feet. Josh could reach it now when he let loose of the bar and flew. Before that time came, he performed all the poses, stood on the trapeze, sat on it, hung by a knee, then two.
On the last swing, the platform approached. No longer level with him, he looked down on it. A rope that hung above it was his target. He freed his knees from the bar and did the Superman routine, for which he was famous.
Halfway there, in mid-air, the harness jolted him to a stop and swung him off course. It pinched his armpits and knocked the wind out of him. He fell, but it would catch him. One of the nets was near, no need to panic.
On the descent the mesh raced toward him within an arm’s reach to the right. Almost there, the harness jerked him to a hard stop with a loud snap. The fall resumed in an instant, and the net approached to his side. Before it passed, he stretched out an arm and grabbed the net’s edge with one hand, with which he held on and dangled.
Struggling to regain his breath, he looked down. Steve waited below on stage with arms outstretched, ready to catch him should he fall. Josh’s breathing calmed. He reached up with his free arm, grabbed the net with two hands now, and lifted himself onto it.
Chapter 38
Steve missed the comfy chair. It sat empty beside the sofa on account of Josh, whose arm draped around his shoulder. They lounged together on one side of the couch. While on the opposite end, Dan and Genie sat and watched TV, which was always turned on in their den. Difficult to talk, but after what had happened, Steve preferred it that way. He pressed the remote and surfed. Dan gave him the privilege.
“Why not?” Genie looked like she was about to pop, but her due date wasn’t for a few weeks yet. “Steve, what happened?”
Oh, no. He squirmed. Here came the twenty questions. Shouldn’t she have something else on her mind, given her condition? If anything, it made her snoopier, if that were possible. He had no answer for her but should say something. “I think they wanted a fresh look.”
A gentle squeeze on his shoulder from Josh’s hand, and their eyes connected. “You look fresh to me.”
It was nice Josh tried to cheer him up, even though it didn’t work. He leaned his head on Josh’s arm that held him tight. It soothed him. The surfing helped too. “Thanks, babe.”
“Didn’t you have a contract?” Genie asked.
Channels flipped. Steve’s finger clicked. “Not anymore.”
“Bummer,” Dan said. “Guess we’re getting old, buddy. No more screaming women.”
Genie got loud. “Since when did you have screaming women?”
“Before we met.” Dan spoke too fast. This was obvious from Steve’s point of view. Dan was going to get it now.
Genie huffed. “Probably screaming at you, not for you.”
Yep, he saw that one coming and couldn’t help but laugh. For once Genie was right. Thanks a lot, Dan. That crack about getting old didn’t help. Stick to football talk. You’re better off that way.
“It was just a gig. Right? Wasn’t it?” Genie asked. “Maybe you can find another one.”
He shrugged. “I’m no dancer. I’m a realtor. That show was just a phase for me. It was fun while it lasted.”
The arm behind his neck pulled him in, and Josh patted his chest. That was nice. While enjoying the attention, he came across a movie. “I love this.”
“Oh, what is it?” Genie asked.
“Diamonds Are Forever.”
“James Bond. You like that.” She wrinkled her nose. “Don’t you?”
“Yeah, it’s great.”
“You weren�
��t even born when this one came out,” she said. “Your father was a kid.”
“I like the new ones, so I watch the old ones.” No one was going to deny him this today. The TV was his. Dan let him have it.
“It’s not on the Bechdel List,” she said.
“Why not? It’s got female characters with names, plenty.”
Genie looked it up on her phone. “One of their names is Plenty, along with Bambi and Thumper. Needless to say, they’ve nothing to say.”
“It’s got gay guys,” Steve said. “Partners. They’re assassins. That’s cool, creepy, but cool.”
“Do they fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after?” she asked.
“No, this was the seventies. No on-screen romance. They just run around killing people.”
“Taco needs a walk.” The dog jumped to the ground and danced at Dan’s feet.
“How are things going, Josh?” Genie asked. “We have to do lunch and catch up.”
Josh took his arm back and stretched. “We’re planning a get-together at my house. I pushed the button on the invitation today. You didn’t get it?”
“No. Oh, here it is.” She fumbled with her phone. “How nice. What’s this about an announcement? How exciting! What is it? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“It’s a surprise,” Josh said. “Don’t even try. It’s not what you think.”
“Don’t make me guess. Someone lost their virginity?” She looked Steve’s way and winked at him.
He cringed. That was so crude. He didn’t understand why Josh insisted on talking to her about their personal business. And she always took Josh’s side on everything.
Genie must have seen his reaction. She stared at him, and he could tell she had something to say.
Dan got up. “Let’s find the leash, Taco.” The little dog pranced to the collar in the corner and picked it up with his teeth.
“You look tense,” Genie said. “What’s the matter? Got a problem, Steve?”
He knew he’d be sorry, but he couldn’t hold it in. She never sided with him, and Josh shouldn’t have talked to her about it. “At least it isn’t some crazy superstition.”
“Time to go. See you all.” Dan didn’t waste any time leaving. Taco’s wagging tail was the last thing out, and a little bark the last thing heard from the other room before the front door creaked and thudded shut.
The Curse of Flight Page 17
