by B. V. Larson
“Damnation…” I said. “That is bad. Real bad.”
“Yes, it is,” Galina said. “Is there anything you could say or do that might be remotely helpful?”
“Hmm… I’ve got just one question: Why do you think they’re making such a big stink out of this? I mean, I thought the Mogwa and the Skay had signed a treaty concerning Province 921.”
“Treaties are meant to be broken, McGill,” Graves said.
“Yeah, but… this could mean a whole new war between them.”
“It may come to that,” Galina said. “We shall see.”
“How long do we have? Before the Nairbs get here, I mean?”
“The Nairbs?” Graves asked. “Don’t you mean the Galactics themselves?”
“Oh well,” I said, “I figure they might send a few representatives, but the Mogwa don’t like to leave the center of the galaxy. They’ll send the Nairbs to do most of the investigating.”
Galina lit up the wall by running a finger across it. A map of the galaxy glowed into life. It only showed our local region, from the Orion Arm of the Milky Way to the center. Trantor, the Mogwa homeworld, was clearly marked in red like a gleaming eye.
Between the blue dot that was Earth and the gleaming eye that represented Trantor was a single contact. It shined with a golden hue. Galina tapped that fleck of gold. “This is the investigation team, as far as we can determine.”
I whistled long and low. The golden dot was maybe a third of the way out toward Earth already.
“As you can see,” Galina said, “we have only a few more days.”
“Jeez… I had no idea our sensors were this good. A few years back, we could hardly tell what was coming at us.”
Graves and Turov glanced at one another. Turov cleared her throat, and Graves turned toward me.
“That’s an inappropriate observation, McGill,” he said.
“Inappropriate? How so? It’s as plain as day, Primus. Anyone with half a brain—”
“Anyone with half a brain would know when to shut up!” Galina interrupted.
I gawked at her for a moment in surprise, but then I nodded. “Right. Sorry. Hush-hush and all that. Don’t worry, I’m not the kind of clod-hopper to go blabbing about us having illegal long-ranged sensors—leastwise, not in front of the Galactics.”
“Good. You’ll need to keep your brain turned on throughout the coming ordeal.”
“Uh…” I said, eying her. I couldn’t see how asking for a clarification could be considered “inappropriate” so I continued. “How am I involved in all this—exactly?”
“You’re the only one who’s actually been down there,” Grave explained, “down inside the dead Skay, that is. You’re our only witness, and Central has decided not to send anyone else inside after the debacle concerning the SOS signal you somehow triggered.”
“You think they’re going to want to talk to me then?”
“Absolutely. It’s keeping me from sleeping at night.”
“Huh…”
They fell to talking about strategies and what should and should not be said aloud during the investigation. I stopped listening after a while, as I found their ideas impractical.
I knew from long experience with the Nairbs and Mogwa that you couldn’t really predict how such conversations were going to go. To do so was to risk getting surprised and tongue-tied. I preferred to wing-it—that was both a lifelong goal and a firmly held belief for me.
“McGill?” Graves barked at me.
“Huh?”
“What do you plan to tell them? We have to give them something, and now that you’ve heard our prepared statements, we’d like to hear yours, if it’s not too much to ask.”
I looked at them both. My lower jaw sagged open, but I snapped it shut again. For a few seconds I was a blank—but then I had it.
“I’m going to tell them about the pitched battle down there. The battle I saw was full of heroes from both sides, locked in combat for all time. I’m going to suggest that they make a memorial out of this hallowed ground—a place dedicated to the bravery of those long lost souls.”
They blinked at me for a second, but Galina caught on first.
“You mean… to make our Moon some kind of monument? To their battle?”
“Exactly that, sirs.”
They chewed that over for a few moments, and at last Galina nodded. “I like it. If they go for it, they won’t try to steal our Moon.”
“You’ve got the idea, Tribune.”
The corners of her mouth tugged upward. It was almost a smile, almost an expression of hope, but it didn’t last long. And as for Graves, I could tell he wasn’t buying it at all.
“The Skay are machines. The Mogwa are heartless bastards. I’m not expecting much in the way of romantic notions from either of them—or from the Nairbs.”
“We’ll see, sir. We’ll see.”
-15-
The time passed quickly as the alien investigation team drew closer. Each day, Galina held a long meeting in her office. I was bored stupid during these events, but I couldn’t think of a way to get out of them.
In the evenings, however, I found Dawn was very relaxing to spend time with. She wasn’t like a legionnaire woman. Not at all. Not once, for example, did she attempt to murder me. It was like a breath of fresh sweet air just to share her company.
Galina, however, didn’t seem to be as taken with the girl as I was. She kept coming up with reasons why I should be doing something else.
“McGill,” she said out of my tapper, calling at ten-thirty one night. “I think we need you to come up to the observatory.”
I sighed, and Dawn rolled her eyes. She and I were having a nice glass of wine together. I hated wine, but for Dawn I sipped and pretended.
“Uh… Tribune? Can’t that wait until morning?”
Galina became instantly annoyed, no doubt divining my reasons for the delay. “No. Get up here now.”
Shrugging, I gave Dawn a kiss goodbye and left her with her hands on her hips. Suddenly, she moved to the doorway and blocked my exit.
“Hold on,” she said. “I know what this is. You’re going to her, aren’t you?”
“Uh… yeah. That’s what she said.”
Dawn narrowed her eyes. It was one of the first times I’d ever seen her with a pissed look on her face. Galina really was working her magic. Could that be intentional? I wasn’t sure.
“I mean,” she said, “I know about you and the tribune.”
“Are you crazy? Don’t go listening to rumors and idle gossip.”
“Every woman in your legion told me about it. They made a point of it.”
“Well… damn.”
“So, it is true? Is she making up reasons to order you to the observation deck at midnight?”
“It’s only about ten… and besides, lots of people go up there after hours. We did one night, remember?”
“People don’t go up there anymore. Everyone is afraid after Graves and his team got fried.”
I scratched at my ear. “Yeah, well… I’ve got to be going. If this meeting doesn’t run too late, how about I come back here and—”
“Forget it.”
That was that. I was all but kicked out of Dawn’s apartment.
Annoyed and stomping my feet a little, I headed up to see what the hell was so damned important. To my surprise, Galina actually did have a reason to talk to me.
“The expedition is arriving early,” she said, displaying their status.
I stared at the star maps, dumbfounded. “How did they jump like—what? Five thousand extra lightyears?”
“I don’t know, but we’ve seen Galactics do this sort of thing now and then. Central suspects they have highways, of a sort. Something like our gateway posts, but larger, able to transmit an entire spaceship over great distances.”
“Why don’t they just set up posts like that out here in our province? They could be here in minutes instead of days.”
Galina made a pffing sound.
“Because such contrivances are expensive. There’s nothing they want out here, nothing worth trading for. Who would bother to build infrastructure out to Earth? It would be like building a bridge from New York to Antarctica. Pointless and expensive.”
“Oh…”
“Anyway, they will be here about lunchtime tomorrow. I want to go over our script with you one more time. You must have the limits of what you can say, and what you can’t say, clearly in mind.”
I groaned aloud.
She took out a scrap of plastic computer paper and shook it at me. I took the document and pecked at it with my finger. It scrolled and listed countless things. Overall, the list was almost insulting. For instance, I was to make no mention of having killed various Mogwa in the past—as if I was that stupid.
There were a few things, however, that stood out from the rest.
“This is mostly made up of things I can’t say.”
“Of course.”
“Like… I can’t talk about our casting device? Really?”
“No. Absolutely not. Imagine if there is another planet somewhere we are unaware of that has developed such technology. Perhaps they have a Galaxy-wide monopoly on it. Do you want to explain to Nairbs why we’re indiscriminately violating their patent laws?”
“But we don’t know of any such race.”
“So what? For the Nairbs, ignorance of the law is no excuse.”
“Yeah, but we’re not ignorant of the law, we’re ignorant as to whether someone else has invented such a system.”
Galina rolled her eyes at me. Women did that a lot when they spoke to old James McGill.
“Listen,” she said, “they don’t care. There’s nothing fair about it, naturally. They don’t care about that, either.”
I nodded, knowing she was right. I hadn’t laid eyes on a Nairb in years, and I really wasn’t looking forward to this occasion.
“Okay… So the story is we used LIDAR and a very accurate jumpsuit to get me into the Skay’s mouth. That’s all I know.”
“Good. Let’s move on to item forty-six.”
The briefing went on like that until midnight. At that point, I began to get antsy. If I could slip away from my tribune, I might still be able to talk my way back into Dawn’s place for the night.
But Turov was just getting started. I could tell she was full of energy, mostly out of desperation. The big bad Galactics were coming, and it was the last minute to cram session for our coming exam.
“Are you really falling asleep?” she demanded after a trip to the canteen downstairs.
“What? No, no,” I lied.
“Here’s a beer. Wake up.”
I drank my beer, and I did perk up. We talked a bit more. Finally, she noticed I was stargazing again and not listening to her. She kicked me, and I grunted.
“I need more beer.”
“You’ll get none. You’ll pass out if I give you another. I know you.”
“It sure is a wonderful view. Too bad most of these Moonies are too scared to come up here anymore and enjoy it.”
“Yes,” she said softly, sitting nearby. “It is nice.”
She was close. Within grabbing range. Frowning at her, I began to hold suspicions again. “Why is it just you and me up here?”
She shrugged and smiled. “Don’t you like it that way?”
I stood up, aghast. “Dammit! I knew it! You’re just jealous of Dawn and fooling around with me.”
“All right, fine,” she snapped. “Get out of here. Go back to your childish tramp.”
Muttering, I went downstairs. I gave Dawn a try, but she wouldn’t open the door. It was about one-thirty a.m., so I couldn’t really blame her.
I slept alone, and I slept angry. Galina had done it again. She’d made a play for me, and in doing so, she’d scooted another girl out of the way. She’d made sure I wasn’t getting anywhere tonight.
I thought about storming over to her quarters and yelling at her—but I didn’t dare. She was a tricksey woman. I knew if I went to her, she’d pout or walk around half-dressed or something. Knowing myself equally well, I realized I couldn’t chance it.
With a final, irritated sigh, I fell asleep.
-16-
At something like four-thirty in the morning, the whole Moon base went crazy. The Nairbs had jumped closer to Earth again, and they were arriving way ahead of schedule.
“McGill!” Graves shouted through my tapper. “Get out of bed, man! They’re here!”
My eyes snapped open. They were bloodshot and dazed—but I was awake in an instant.
They were here.
That could only mean one thing: the Galactics had come to town. But which ones, exactly, had arrived? I had no idea, but a visit from our alien overlords was never a good thing. It was always like the pope had decided to come to dinner, and you were passed out naked when he showed up.
I skipped my shower, figuring I’d smell a dirty ape to any Galactic whether I scrubbed or not. Scrambling to get my suit on, I rush out the doorway and down the passage beyond. Spacers dodged, cursing, when I charged right through them to get to the dockyard.
“There you are,” Graves said, shaking his head like it was noon or something. “Always a day late and a dollar short, aren’t you McGill?”
“That’s my creedo, sir.”
“Well, shut up and stand still. With any luck they won’t even ask about you. Sateekas didn’t come—neither did Xlur or any of the others we know of.”
My lips clamped together tightly, keeping myself from blurting facts. Sateekas had been more or less deposed the last time he’d come out here as governor. Xlur, on the other hand… well, I’d permed him. I wasn’t proud of it, but there it was. Not everyone knew or acknowledged that dangerous bit of history, so I tried to keep it as forgotten as possible.
Instead of a wobbly Mogwa, a pompous Nairb was the first thing to pop out of the docking chute. Like all his kind, he resembled a seal with partly transparent skin. You could see his organs in there, pumping and oozing around. It was just as disgusting as it sounds, too. He was essentially a green blob of snot.
As Tribune Galina Turov was our most senior officer present, she stepped forward to greet the Nairb. The slime-ball backed up and reared a little, as if alarmed by her approach.
“Hello Inspector,” she said, sounding like she were greeting a long-lost friend. “So magnificent of you to come all the way out here from the Core Worlds. Province 921 is at your service.”
The Nairb eyed her coldly. I don’t think I’d ever seen them eye anyone in any other manner—except maybe when they’d been angry with me.
“You are the ape-creature labeled ‘Turov?’”
“Yes, that’s me. I’m sorry, but our full delegation isn’t scheduled to arrive from Earth until tomorrow. You surprised us with the speed of your ships.”
“That is by design, human. No inspector should arrive when expected. Violations are often covered up if the suspect is given advanced warning.”
Turov blinked twice, but she managed to hold her hands clasped to her belly and her face was locked in a grin. “Of course, of course. Tell me, what can I do for you while we wait for the arrival of the Earth officials from Central?”
“Wait? There will be no waiting. These proceedings will commence immediately.”
“But, ah, sir… I don’t have the authority to—”
“I possess all required authority. Are you refusing to answer my questions?”
“Not at all, Inspector! Not at all!”
Whoa! This Nairb was loaded for bear. I was taken aback, and Galina was too, I could tell. I’d never seen one of these green pukes so angry right out of the gate. Usually, it took a half hour of talking to me to get them into such a state.
“My prosecution probe will wait for no one,” the Nairb continued. “Any Earth official will suffice for my purposes—you’re all equally guilty in any case.”
“I was only suggesting that—”
“Cease offering suggesti
ons. To save time, you can consider them all to be rejected in advance.”
Turov blinked again. I could tell her hands, which were still clasped against her belly, were starting to squeeze together and press against her gut with tension. With an effort, she drew a breath and spoke again.
“In that case, Inspector, tell me what you wish me to do.”
“Finally, you respond with proper subservience! Your reluctance to submit to my authority up until this moment has been noted, Turov. Although such behavior is technically not a crime, it is frowned upon, and it may distort my judgment if you don’t discontinue your attempts at obfuscation.”
As she hadn’t been given a command yet, Galina just stood there staring and gulping in shallow breaths of air. I didn’t envy her. I knew she had a temper, and she had to be visualizing a ritual slaughter of this nasty alien even now. The good Lord knew I was.
The Nairb humped forward a few slappy steps. Behind him, a couple more Nairb underlings followed. They looked around at us warily. Maybe they’d heard a few things about us vicious border-aliens.
“I am the new acting prefect of this Province,” the Inspector said. “My Mogwa mistress is waiting in the ship until I’ve cleared some formalities.”
Galina nodded, but she still didn’t speak as no one had asked a question. Believe me, that’s hard to do when you’re tense. Just try it sometime.
“First question:” the Nairb said, “are any of the humans in this chamber armed? If so, this is unacceptable.”
We glanced around at each other. We were pretty much all armed, naturally. We were military, after all.
“We can and will disarm all our personnel,” Galina answered, “if it will make our new lord more comfortable.”
“That will suffice. We will wait and observe.”
Galina made frantic gestures to Graves and I. Stiffly and with plenty of shaking heads and big frowns, we all passed our service pistols out into the passageway and ditched them.
“Make sure you don’t drop mine,” I warned. “It’s got a hair-trigger. I shaved it down some.”
“That’s against regs, McGill,” Graves grumbled, but I ignored him.
