The Right to Surrender

by H M Thomas

  “Because for me.” She fought the tears that fought to break free. “It kills me to think of you with someone else, to see them touch you.”

  She shook her head and stepped away. He’d only feed her more lies, and she didn’t want to hear them. She slung her bag over her shoulder and hurried from the room, not even hoping he’d follow. He’d disappointed her enough for one night.

  When she reached the bar, Amber had already placed a glass on the bar for her. She took it and turned in time to see Finn escort Ronnie from the club.

  ~ ~ ~

  “What’s the story with the dancer?” Ronnie asked Finn as they sat in the back of her town car on the way to her hotel. Despite the power Ronnie appeared to wield in the rest of the world, Carlisle insisted Finn escort her home each night. Carlisle liked to play with people’s lives as much as possible. He’d tried to do it earlier when he’d sent Gretchen to ask Finn what he wanted to drink. Gretchen hadn’t fallen for the bait though. Finn had been the one to forget the rules.

  “Not much of a story. I think she’s been there a couple of months,” he finally answered.

  “You two seemed friendly.” Ronnie slid across the seat and pressed against his side. She stretched up until her mouth feathered against his ear. “Did you fuck her tonight?”

  He shifted away, managing to stifle the anger piqued by her question. “I did not,” he lied smoothly.

  “So what did you do?” She took his hand and lifted it to her mouth. Her tongue swiped out and licked at his fingertips. “I can smell her on your fingers, Jay.”

  Finn jerked his hand back. “Don’t.”

  “I can share.” Leaning back against the seat, Ronnie pursed her lips in an imitation pout. “As long as I get to play too.”

  “I’m not yours to share,” he reminded her. “We’ve never been like that.”

  Ronnie’s sneer accused him of being a fool if he thought either of them believed what he said.

  “I may be around more often now.” She lifted a shoulder absently. “I thought that might change things for us.”

  His stomach twisted. “Why would you be around? I thought you liked Miami.”

  “I do, but there are certain perks here I enjoy.” She ran a hand over his thigh, between his legs and over his still-sensitive dick.

  “Raymond has his own hookers.” He gripped her wrist until her face twisted with pain.

  “He does.” Pulling away, she cradled her wrist to her chest. “But I have clients with very distinct and peculiar appetites. Raymond’s girls don’t sate that type of hunger.”

  “I suppose I can see how being legal and willing would be a turnoff for some of the men you deal with,” he spat.

  Ronnie laughed. “Don’t be so dramatic. It’s not like you haven’t broken the law a time or two.”

  Finn nodded. True. He’d broken the law more times than he could count, but he liked to think he’d never caused the innocent to suffer.

  “I draw the line at kidnapping and rape.” He hadn’t confirmed Gretchen’s suspicions when she’d asked about Ronnie at his apartment. He didn’t let himself know what Ronnie actually did, because in his gut he knew Gretchen had been right. As Ronnie turned her eyes away from his without comment, he had all the truth he needed.

  ~ ~ ~

  Gretchen’s cell phone shattered the silence of her bedroom, yanking her from sleep. She reached blindly for it, knocking several things from the bedside table.

  “Hello,” she managed.

  “Hey, are you asleep?”

  Finn. Despite herself, the familiar joy at hearing his voice swept through her. “I was.” She yawned.

  “So, I guess you wouldn’t want to spend the night at my place?”

  Was he kidding? “No, I’m asleep; call Ronnie.”

  “It’s not like that,” he tried.

  She didn’t even care. He’d fucked her and then left her to go home alone while he left with Ronnie. She let out a slow breath. “I’m exhausted, and I’m not interested in coming over.”

  “What if I came to you?”

  She listened for something to tell her he missed her and wanted to hold her and love her and not just use her body. Instead she only heard his steady breathing. “I’m not interested in her leftovers. Nor am I interested in satisfying whatever needs she left you with. I’m tired. Good night.”

  She ended the call before she lost her nerve. Despite how much she wanted him to come to her, she wouldn’t admit it to him. He’d had the chance to ask her to wait up for him earlier, instead, he’d gotten off and walked away. He didn’t get to change his mind now. The indifferent pole dancer was a fine role to play in public, but she’d be damned if she’d play it in private.

  Something rustled in the bush beneath her bedroom window, before she heard a low murmur. She closed her eyes before she slowly shook her head. Of course, Finn wouldn’t take a simple no. She hurried to the window and drew up the blinds.

  “Finn, I—” The rest of the sentence jammed in her throat at the sight of a man’s fleeing back.

  Rushing to her bedside table, she pulled out her gun, and sprinted into the night. By the time she reached the spot outside her window, whoever she’d heard had vanished.

  Under her window a glimmering object caught the light from the streetlamp. She plodded over and her bare feet sank into the damp soil behind two perfect boot prints. A dozen or so cigarette butts littered the ground, whoever she’d heard had watched her for a while. She bent and picked up the gold lighter from the dirt. She turned it over, hoping her suspicions were wrong.

  “Motherfucker,” she muttered when they weren’t.

  Chapter 10

  Gretchen entered the club like a tornado and scanned the room for Grant. She found him on the other side of the still-growing crowd and stomped her way to him.

  “Did you enjoy yourself last night?” She shoved him hard enough that she stumbled, but he stood there like an immovable mountain.

  He looked down at her with a shake of his head, a smile hid at the corners of his mouth. “I did, but unless my wife’s talked to you, I don’t know how you’d know. Why don’t you tell me what you mean?”

  Gretchen glared back at him. He had to be lying. She held up the lighter she’d found outside her bedroom window and watched his eyes narrow.

  “Where’d you find that?” His mood lightened, not what she’d expect from a man caught peeping.

  “Outside my bedroom window.” She jerked her hand and the lighter away as he reached for them. “Did you enjoy the view last night? I’m sorry you had nothing to report back to your boss, you bastard.” She spun away.

  Grant hurried in front of her, careful not to touch her. “I haven’t been anywhere near your place, Lilah.” He held his hands up in defense. “Jay only asked me to watch out for you here at the club.”

  “Don’t lie to me,” she yelled before reining in her temper. “I found your lighter, you don’t go anywhere without it.”

  “I know, I know.” He nodded and dug in the front pocket of his black slacks. “I lost my original a few months back, my wife got me another one.” He held up an identical lighter.

  Gretchen took it from him and ran her thumb over the replicated engraving.

  “You can ask her,” he offered. “Tell her what you found. I swear she’d have my balls if she thought I watched you. She wouldn’t cover for me.”

  Gretchen nodded and handed him back the lighter. She had to fight against the nerves suddenly attacking her. “Okay.”

  She liked Grant, even if she did get upset that he intervened every time someone showed interest in her. In her gut she’d known he wasn’t a voyeur, but now that meant she had no idea who’d been watching her.

  “You okay?” Grant bent slightly, forcing her to meet his eyes. />
  “Yeah,” she lied. “You mind if I hold on to the other lighter for a while?”

  “As long as you want.” His words were careful, his voice low.

  She nodded absently. Who the hell had been spying on her? She turned.

  Before she could walk away, Grant stepped close enough only she could hear what he said next. “I’m pretty sure I lost that lighter here, so whoever dropped it . . .” He didn’t have to finish. Whoever had dropped it had been at the club too.

  “I’ve got your back.” He waited for her to look up and meet his warm brown eyes. “Anyone messes with you, don’t hesitate.”

  Tears stung her eyes, and she nodded, not trusting her voice to reply.

  His stare bore down on her as she headed backstage. Normally, when she arrived before her first dance, she mingled with the crowd or other dancers, but she didn’t feel like it tonight. Someone, possibly someone here now, had followed her to her apartment the night before, stood outside her bedroom window and watched her sleep. She’d been aware of the possibility; it was why Carpenter had rented the apartment in the first place so as not to risk someone following her to her own home. Until now, she hadn’t believed anyone deemed her important enough to watch closely.

  Stilettos tapped out a rhythm on the concrete floor behind her. She glanced in the mirror to her left and found Ronnie Sinclair assessing her with a cool eye.

  She considered kissing the other woman’s ass, but decided she’d get a truer sense of a woman like Ronnie Sinclair if she pissed her off. “Something I can help you with?”

  Ronnie’s condescending grin reflected in the mirror.

  Gretchen clenched her fists and waited.

  “You’re excellent at what you do.” Ronnie ran her hand along the makeup table beside her as she came forward.

  “What do you want?” Gretchen turned, slamming her locker behind her.

  “Can’t I compliment a talented woman when I see one?” Ronnie’s hand went to her chest as her eyes opened wide in false surprise.

  “Last night you didn’t even want to meet me,” Gretchen reminded her. “Sorry if I’m not fooled by the let’s-be-girlfriends bullshit.”

  “You’re right.” Ronnie stopped and straightened. “Another thing for me to admire about you, Lilah Jennings.”

  It didn’t bother Gretchen that the other woman had checked up on her, she’d expected it. Ronnie wanted her to be upset by it though, so Gretchen glared at her.

  Ronnie’s lip curled in satisfaction. “Just so you know, I did not get your last name from Jay. He didn’t know it.”

  So that’s the game she wanted to play? Gretchen snickered. “Why would he? We don’t talk much when we’re together.”

  Another person may have missed the quick flare of jealousy in Ronnie’s cool blue eyes, but Gretchen didn’t.

  “I came to let you know I’m considering offering you a position within my organization.” Ronnie recovered. “It’s a bit more selective than the clubs. I cater to wealthy, cultured men, with distinct appetites.”

  Gretchen had to remind herself that Lilah would be expected to be flattered by the offer and disguise the fact that the idea of satisfying Ronnie’s clients’ appetites made her stomach turn.

  She slid atop the table behind her and leaned back on her arms as if unable to care less about the proposal. “And what am I supposed to do with that information?”

  “Consider it,” Ronnie replied. “And consider what you need to do to be successful with me. My men don’t like women who fall in love easily.”

  Gretchen raised a brow. “I’m sorry?”

  “You and Jay, that isn’t real, Lilah. You need to learn to recognize those things, or you won’t make it in this industry.”

  Gretchen’s body shook with laughter. “I assure you I have no delusions about what we are to each other. And I’m not a woman who falls in love easily.”

  “Hmmm.” Ronnie considered her for a moment before nodding. “Perhaps. Just know I’m watching, waiting to see if you’re worthy.”

  Gretchen nodded. She’d make herself worthy. Forget Raymond Carlisle, she’d bring this bitch to her knees.

  Ronnie eyed her for another moment before she turned and strutted back out into the club.

  Gretchen sat up, her body suddenly tense. She knew what Ronnie wanted and why she’d even consider offering her a job. It had nothing to do with what she thought Gretchen could do and everything to do with Finn. She wanted Gretchen to know she was nothing to him. Well, she didn’t need a damn news bulletin to figure that out.

  ~ ~ ~

  Finn tried to pretend Gretchen wasn’t purposely avoiding him like a fucking plague, but when two hours had passed, and she still hadn’t so much as glanced his way, he could no longer pretend. He stood from the table, determined to talk with her, when Grant appeared at his side.

  “Be easy on her.”

  Finn turned to him. “Excuse me?”

  Although he and Grant had become friendlier over the years, the other man still worked for him, and he didn’t take kindly to being given orders by anyone.

  Grant narrowed his eyes. “She’s had a rough day. She came in and laid into me. I think someone followed her home last night.”

  He had Finn’s full attention now. “What do you mean you think someone followed her home?”

  Fury, an emotion he grew more accustomed to the more he watched Gretchen in this damn club, seeped into his veins, as Grant filled him in on what he’d gathered from Gretchen.

  “She thought I sent you to make sure she went home alone.” He scrubbed a hand over his face before scanning the club.

  “Listen.” Grant stepped closer, and his voice dropped. “You can’t keep her safe. Your interest in her only makes it more dangerous for her.” He met Finn’s eyes. “Especially since Ronnie’s back.”

  He didn’t have to say what they both knew. No one could trust Ronnie, and she’d do anything to get what she wanted. What Grant didn’t leave out was true too. Finn couldn’t protect Gretchen, and he very well may have pointed a target right at her.

  “Ronnie followed her backstage earlier,” Grant informed him.

  Finn’s head snapped back to him. “What? Why?”

  Grant only shrugged and shook his head. “Your guess is as good as mine. Lilah won’t talk to me either.”

  Finn searched the crowd for her.

  “They’re watching how you play this, Jay.” Grant never stopped scanning the room.

  Finn clenched his jaw. “Take her home tonight. Check to see if you’re followed. Then check her apartment, make sure it’s clean and safe.”

  “I can do that.” He nodded. “You want me to stay with her?”

  If it were anyone else, Finn may have been suspicious of the offer, but he trusted Grant. The man had a wife and little girl at home, and he’d want to get home to them tonight. “No. Get her settled and then head home to your family.”

  “Will do.” Grant clasped a large hand on his shoulder then walked away.

  Finn pushed out a pent-up breath and found Gretchen on the other side of the club. She sat on a barstool, nursing a drink and watching the dance floor. He strolled to the vacant spot beside her. “You haven’t had much to say tonight.”

  “I prefer to wait until I have something worth saying.” She didn’t turn toward him. “So far, I’ve got nothing.”

  “You don’t think finding someone outside your bedroom window falls into that category?” He took his drink from the bartender and turned to lean against the bar beside her, following her gaze to the dance floor.

  “Nope.”

  “Don’t get pissed at me and get yourself hurt,” he chastised.

  She took a large gulp of her whiskey. “I can handle myself. You can release your bodyguards. It b
ecomes a bit boring to sit in a club and have nothing to do.”

  “I’ve told them no one—”

  “Yeah, I know. No one can touch me. Message. Received. By. Everyone.”

  Her lips curved, and she dipped a finger into her drink before she slowly sucked the liquid away. Finn’s dick twitched to life with the sudden memory of those lips wrapped around him.

  “You sure Grant can’t be persuaded though?”

  She wanted him to react, so he only shrugged. “I told him I’d kill him if he did.” He forced his voice to remain calm, steady.

  She rolled her eyes. “I’m sure he’s not worried about your empty threats.”

  Finn snickered. “He’s seen what I can do, baby.” He bent, letting his lips brush her ear. “There’s a reason no one’s touched you, and it’s not because they don’t want to. They know who I am. Perhaps you should do better research.”

  “Is that a threat?”

  He pulled away and met her fake blue eyes. “I’d never hurt you, never lay a hand on you. That’s one thing I can promise you.”

  “It’s about the only thing isn’t it, Jay?” She didn’t look away as she gave him time to think over her question. “I think your girlfriend warned me away from you tonight. She offered me a job—”

  “Don’t even think about it.”

  “She wanted to make sure I understood I wouldn’t do well in her line of work if I fell in love easily.” Her gaze bore into his, as she no doubt waited for his reaction. He didn’t give one. “I assured her that wouldn’t be a problem.”

  He nodded. He’d never expect Gretchen to fall in love lightly, but he’d still thought maybe she’d fallen in love with him. “She doesn’t know we’re sleeping together.”