Ice & Rapture

by Connie Mason

  "Why, I reckon her pa will take care of her," Rusty said, his voice tinged with amusement

  "If Gordon wanted his daughter, she'd be with him now," Chase muttered darkly "It's obvious Maggie and Gordon didn't love one another enough to many "

  "I ain't talkin' 'bout Gordon," Rusty hinted slyly "I never figured ya fer a dim-witted jackass "

  "Damnation, Rusty, what in the hell are youjawin' about1?"

  "A man what ain't got sense enough ta recognize his own youngun deserves ta be jawed at"

  Chase's blue eyes flew to Beth, searching her tiny face as if seeing her for the first time "This is no time for funrun "

  "Ain't funrun' Did Maggie ever say Beth was that Mountie's daughter1?"

  "No, but—"

  "But nothin' Beth is over five months old, you figure that one out"

  Chase's mind worked furiously Fourteen months ago he and Maggie had made love in Skagway Could it possibly be true1?

  Rusty saw doubt in Chase's eyes and upbraided him soundly "Hell's bells, son, we all know who Beth's father is Ifyahad an ounce of sense, ya'dknow it too "

  "What is this, some kind of conspiracy1? Why didn't someone tell me1?"

  "It was Maggie's place ta tell ya She had some damn fool notion that ya'd only want her fer yer child's sake if ya knew I reckon she'd a told ya sooner or later "

  "How much later1? Beth is already five months old "

  "Didn't ya suspect somethin' when Maggie turned up at the ranch with a baby1?'

  "Hell, no I Beth is such a tiny little mite, I figured her for a newborn, not a five-month-old infant I thought Maggie came to me because Gordon left her and she needed someone She had no family, no one to turn to, and we once meant everything to each other "

  "Well now ya know Let's hope it's not too late "

  "I reckon I got no one to blame but myself," Chase said deprecatingly "I reacted without thinkin' when I saw Maggie in Seattle, pregnant and with Gordon Naturally I assumed the worst Maggie looked pregnant, but not nine months pregnant Besides, it hurt like hell that she had deliberately lied to me about bein' unable to conceive It was a shock seem' her like that"

  "And ya hightailed it back to Montana without askin' fer an explanation "

  "I always was hotheaded. Rusty I wish I knew what Gordon was doin' with Maggie that day "

  "Maggie will have to answer that"

  "Lordy, I only hope her memory returns so she can answer it"

  "Mr McGarrett?"

  Chase whirled to face the doctor, who had just emerged from Maggie's room "How is she. Doc1?"

  "Gimme the baby. Chase, so ya can talk ta Doc Foster I'll find Spotted Deer," Rusty volunteered

  "Physically, your wife is fine," the doctor advised, assuming Maggie was Chase's wife "The bruises will heal in time and the swelling on her head is already receding, but—"

  "Giveittowestraight.Doc I know Maggie's memory is gone Is it permanent1?" Doctor Foster sighed tiredly It was difficult to

  predict what he didn't know himself A portly man with a ruddy complexion and receding hairline, he clapped Chase on the shoulder and led him off farther down the hall where Maggie couldn't overhear

  "A head injury such as this is difficult to diagnose I've seen cases where the memory loss lasts only a day But it could last a week, a month, or even a year You'll just have to be patient with your wife, Mr McGarrett Explain as clearly as possible when she asks questions, and I'm sure she will ask questions, many of them One day something will jog her memory, and it will be as if nothing has happened "

  Chase hung on the doctor's every word "Are there any instructions or precautions we should follow1?"

  "Nothing special Let her get out of bed whenever she feels strong enough, but don't push her to remember Your wife is confused right now and needs love and understanding Just see that she doesn't overdo things "

  "Much obliged. Doc," Chase said, pulling some bills out of his pocket and pressing them in the doctor's hand "Send for me if you need me I can find my way out—go to your wife She needs you "

  Maggie's eyes were wide and troubled when Chase entered the room "The doctor said I lost my memory " Her lower lip trembled and she looked like a lost little girl

  "It's only temporary, darfin' "

  "He—he called me Mrs McGarrett Are you my husband1?"

  Maggie's innocent question placed a terrible strain on Chase's drained emotions He'd give his fortune to be able to say he and Maggie were man and wife "No, I'm not your husband—not yet We're to be married soon, though "

  "The—the baby Is she ours?"

  "Yep," Chase answered proudly "Beth is our daughter, yours and mine "

  "I don't understand," Maggie said, frowning "If we have a child, why aren't we married1?"

  "It's a long story, Maggie girl, and I don't want to burden you with it now When you're feelin' better, I'll explain everythin' I want you well for our weddin' "

  "We're to be married1?" Maggie repeated numbly

  "It's about time, wouldn't you say1?" Chase hinted slyly "I'll leave you now to get some rest You scared the wits outta us last night"

  "Chase?"

  "Yeah?"

  "Our baby, how old is she1?"

  "Five months old"

  "She's still nursing, isn't she1? I ache and there's milk " Maggie flushed with embarrassment, but decided that if she had a baby with Chase they were intimate enough to discuss these things

  Chase didn't need a ton of bricks to fall on him to realize what Maggie was implying "Would you like Spotted Deer to bring the baby to you1? There's no hurry, she's bein' taken care of until you're able "

  "You don't understand. Chase, I need to nurse her " She looked down at herself and Chase followed her gaze, noting that the front of her chemise was already saturated with overflowing breast milk

  "You're right, darlin', I'll take care of it right away

  Maggie watched Chase stride from the room, wishing she could remember him Never had she seen such an attractive man He looked so strong, so masculine and virile, yet he had been so very gentle with her Just the thought that she had known him intimately set her atremble She couldn't remember his loving, but something deep and profound told her it had been very special

  But there were still so many unanswered questions, so much that needed explaining For instance, why weren't they already married1? Was something or someone preventing their union1? Then Spotted Deer entered the room with Beth

  Maggie was hesitant at first, but Beth was so happy to see her mother that Maggie soon lost her heart to the adorable little tyke It seemed only natural that she bare her breast and offer it to the child Beth did the rest, latching on to the nipple and suckling greedily The feeling was so familiar and rewarding that Maggie relaxed against the pillow, sighing contentedly Though she didn't remember her own child, she loved her already

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  "A weddin'I Is that wise. Chase1?" Kate criticized "Maggie don't even remember ya "

  Over a week had elapsed since Maggie's accident, and she showed no signs of regaining her memory She had been out of bed for several days now and appeared shy around everyone except Beth

  "Maggie believes what I told her," Chase said tersely "I said we were planning our weddin' when she had her accident I explained that we didn't many before Beth's birth 'cause I was in the Yukon and couldn't get back in time "

  "What if her memory returns and she hates ya fer lyin' ta her1?"

  "I'll cross that bridge when I come to it," Chase temporized "Maggie will be my wife even if I have to resort to trickery to accomplish it It's my decision, and if it backfires I've no one to blame but myself"

  Privately Kate thought Chase was making a mistake by marrying Maggie when she wasn't herself But she could understand his motives There was only one question that needed answering, and if Kate received the wrong reply, she'd put a stop to Chase's wedding plans

  "Do ya love Maggie, Chase1? Or are ya rnamn' her fer yer child's sake1? 'Pears ta me y
a woulda asked her weeks ago if ya loved her "

  "Call me a stubborn fool, Kate, or an idiot, but I never stopped lovin' Maggie I was all set to ask her to marry me the night of the fire, but all hell broke loose Afterwards, rebuildin' the stables took priority and I put my personal life on hold It didn't even matter to me if Beth wasn't mine," Chase admitted, "I grew to love that little girl like she was my own "

  "She is yer own," Kate reminded him

  "I know that now, but it wouldn't have mattered Maggie and I belong together Beth bein' mine makes everythin' perfect"

  Kate had no objection to Chase's sentiments Love was an emotion that knew no logic

  Virgie found Maggie alone She appeared to be in a pensive mood as she sat on the wide porch, staring off into the distance It was actually the first time since Maggie's accident that Virgie had the opportunity to speak privately with her Virgie deliberately pulled a chair close so they couldn't be overheard

  "It's good to see you up and around, Maggie "

  "I know you're Virgie, but I don't remember you," Maggie said, feeling vaguely on edge with this lovely brunette "Are we friends'?"

  "The best of friends," Virgie lied convincingly "We hit it off the moment you came to the ranch You told me all your secrets and I told you mine "

  "What kinds of secrets'?" Maggie asked, her interest piqued

  "For instance, I know why you went to town the day of your accident"

  "Was there some mystery about it1?"

  "No one knew you had even gone into town," Virgie revealed "You told me you wanted to purchase a train ticket to Seattle for you and Beth "

  "I wanted to leave the ranch1?" What Virgie said sounded incredible, yet what reason did she have to lie1? Why would Chase lie1?

  "Chase and I were to be married Why would I leave1?"

  "It's a lie, Maggie Chase never proposed to you You were living here as his—well, you're smart enough to figure it out"

  "No,it can't bel"Maggie protested "I'm not like that That is, I don't think I am "

  "Chase can be mighty persuasive "

  "What about Beth? We have a daughter together "

  "I hate to be the one to tell you this, Maggie, but Beth doesn't belong to Chase Her father is a man named Scott Gordon He's a Mountie you met in the Yukon and fell in love with " No one had actually discussed Scott with Virgie, but when Maggie first arrived she had overheard Chase and Rusly talking about the Mountie She couldn't hear everything, but she did hear Chase blurt out that Scott Gordon was Beth's father

  Maggie grew still, unwilling to believe Virgie's damning words "Why am I here if I love Scott Gordon1?" she asked quietly

  "I'm not sure," Virgie said truthfully "Evidently you and Chase were friends, and you turned to him in desperation when your lover refused to many you "

  Maggie's head spun craaly None of this made sense Yet it made as much sense as marrying Chase,

  for her past was a blank "If what you say is true, why does Chase want to many me1?"

  "He feels sorry for you You came to him for help and he's offering you his name out of pity and to save your reputation No mention of marriage was made until you lost your memory Ask Aunt Kate if you don't believe me Besides, I think Chase rather enjoys bedding you "

  Virgie's barbed words were nearly more than Maggie could bear All traces of color drained from her face and she sucked her breath in sharply Virgie certainly was being blunt for someone who professed to be her friend Was everyone on the ranch aware that she was Chase's—whore1? How could she bear the shame1? Why had Scott Gordon left her and their child1? Did pity for her provoke Chase into claiming Beth'? Maggie rose stiffly from her chair, moving off in jerking motions

  "Where are you going, Maggie1?" Virgie asked, smirking behind her back

  Maggie didn't answer as she walked off in a trance She had much to think about, many things to consider She hadn't counted on Kate intercepting her before she reached her room She attempted to brush past the kindly woman, but Kate sensed Maggie's distress and forestalled her

  "Maggie, what is it, honey, are ya sick1? Does yer head hurt1?"

  Maggie turned to Kate, her eyes blank, her mind in a turmoil Virgie's cruel words had pierced her heart like well-aimed arrows Chase had seemed so kind and loving Was pity all he felt for her1? Pity and friendship1? Kate would knowl Kate had known her since her days in the Yukon Or so she'd been informed Dear God, why couldn't she remember1? Did she have a lover named Scott Gordon1? Was he Beth's father1? There was only one way to find out

  "Kate, I need to know something and I want the truth "

  "Has someone been tellin'ya things'?" Kate asked, frightened by the utter dispair visible in Maggie's golden eyes

  "That's not important I want to know if Chase and I planned to marry before my accident All I know of my past life is what Chase told me I'm depending on you, Kate—please don't lie to me "

  Kate sat on the horns of a dilemma She hated to refute Chase's words, but neither did she want to deliberately lie to Maggie and lose her trust "Chase always wanted ya fer his wife "

  "That's not what I asked, Kate "

  "Chase wouldn't take ya fer his wife if he didn't love ya," Kate temporized

  "Chase is a good man What he feels is pity for me and Beth Obviously he proposed to save me from bearing the stigma of being an unwed mother " She couldn't bring herself to ask Kate if she and Chase were lovers

  "Maggie, it's not what ya think " Oh, Lordy, how was she going to get out of this one1?

  "Please answer my question Was our wedding already being planned when I lost my memory1?"

  "Not so far as I know," Kate finally admitted '"Course, I don't know everythin' Ya coulda made plans I knew nothin' about But the baby—"

  "Thank you, Kate," Maggie said in a strangled voice, "I've heard enough I know all about the baby and how she was conceived " Maggie had her answer and knew exactly what she had to do

  In her room, Maggie rummaged through her belongings, hoping to find something to spark her memory She came across a bankbook from a Seattle bank showing a substantial balance She examined carefully the writing she had been involved in prior to her accident and the letters in her suitcase There

  was one from her publisher, another from a man named Fred Grant All she experienced was a vague tug at her memory, but it was a start The doctor assured her she'd remember everything one day What truly frightened her were the terrible things she might learn about herself There was only one way to discover the truth, Maggie decided with grim determination She must return to Seattle and learn all she could about herself She pulled out her suitcase and began emptying her drawers of all their contents

  "Going somewhere1?" Not bothering to knock, Virgie stood in the doorway

  "I'm going back to Seattle "

  "So you took my advice and spoke with Aunt Kate "

  Maggie nodded "Yes, and I want to thank you for—for telling me the truth No one else cared enough about me to do so I don't want to be pitied, not by Chase, not by anyone I appreciate your candor "

  "We're friends, Maggie I'd hate for you to make a mistake you'd regret the rest of your life But I think it best if you don't tell Chase I told you all this He has a vile temper when crossed " Now that she'd accomplished what she set out to do, she had no wish to face Chase's wrath

  "I won't forget what you've done for me, Virgie, and I promise not to mention our conversation to anyone "

  Though Maggie felt gratitude toward Virgie, something about the beautiful brunette bothered her But without a memory Maggie felt she couldn't trust her own instincts

  Instinct had convinced her Chase loved her when it was merely pity he felt Leaving the ranch seemed the best thing for Maggie to do under the circumstances The one thing that puzzled her was her

  purpose in coming to Montana in the beginning Had she come seeking solace from Chase because her lover had deserted her, as Virgie said1? If only she could remember

  A knock on the door interrupted Maggie's reverie
"Maggie, I've just returned from town and can't wait to tell you the plans I made for us " "Come in. Chase," Maggie said She might as well tell him she was leaving now and get the unpleasantness over with

  "I've made all the arrangements," Chase said, bursting with excitement "The weddin' will be Saturday The preacher—" His sentence ended abruptly when he saw the open suitcase and clothes strewn haphazardly over the bed and chairs "What is this, Maggie1?"

  "I—I'm leaving. Chase"

  Chase's blue eyes darkened with shock and the thin line of his lips gave Maggie ample warning of his feelings on the subject "You're not goin' anywhere

  "You can't stop me "

  "You wanna bet1? What's this all about, Maggie1?" Chase asked, thoroughly confused "Has your memory returned1? If it has, you'll remember how much we love each other "

  "My memory hasn't returned I remember nothing of my past'

  "Talk to me, darlin', tell me what's bothenn' you "

  "Why did you lie to me. Chase1? Why did you tell me we had planned to marry before my accident when nothing could be further from the truth1?"

  "Darnnationl Has someone been tellin' you things'?"

  "It's not important, just answer my question "

  "If someone's been talkin' to you, I'll have their hide for causin' you distress You've enough problems right now "

  "I don't want your pity. Chase Before my accident I was living here as your whore You had no intention of changing the way things were between us I'm going back to Seattle I have enough money in the bank to support me and Beth "

  "You're not takin' my daughter anywhere, and you're certainly no whore I"

  Maggie flushed Did Chase actually believe Beth was his daughter1? Didn't he know about Scott Gordon1? Everyone else did "Beth doesn't bear your name and you have no say over what I do with her "