Villains Deception
Page 29
“Oh, we add a pre-epilogue?” Wraith Knight said.
“Are you touched in the head?” Sophia asked.
I held out my hand. “No, he’s on to something. A prepilogue, I like it. We can even say up front that the contents of the prepilogue happens after the main story.”
“So in this prepilogue, we show both Wraith Knight and me alive?” Myst added.
“Exactly,” I said. “That way, the fault’s on the reader, not us, if they get mad at not seeing the twist coming.”
“People always forget what happens in the beginning of a book!” Sophia said. “That’s brilliant, sir!”
“Thank you.”
“It . . . it was my idea,” Wraith Knight said.
“Shut up, Wendell,” Sophia snapped. “No one likes a braggart.”
“Well, I think the whole thing sucked!” Randy yelled from his seat in the observation area. “You killed me in the first act. That is bullshit.”
“And I wasn’t even in the story,” my sister Paige pouted.
“That’s because no one likes you,” I called out to them. “Either of you. You are the least favorite characters in my adventures.”
“People like me,” Randy countered. “I’ve read a few reviews that said they liked me.”
“Those are probably the same assholes who claim the Star Wars prequels are good.”
“Well, folks are going to hate this one,” Randy declared. “You can’t just subvert people’s expectations over and over and think they’ll like it.”
Huh.
A thought occurred to me.
“Sophia, schedule a meeting with those studio execs. I have an idea for a movie.”
Epilogue . . . the Real one
. . . However long it takes to make a move after the prepilogue (which you should really have remembered)
“You ruined the franchise!” the voice on the other and of the phone said.
“And hello to you as well,” I said.
The voice sighed. “Have you seen the reviews?”
“Yes,” I said. “Most of them agree that it was a beautiful movie. Well acted, and it had amazing imagery. Well done.”
“But the nerds are saying I ruined their childhood!”
I waved a hand. “They say that about everything. Just call them all sexist man-babies. That should buy you, and me, enough time to cash the checks.”
“But they think it’s my fault! We were following the outline you gave the studio.”
“Hah hah . . . yeah.”
“You said that subverting the tropes would make for a great story!” the voice yelled.
“Heh, yeah, I did.”
“Thanks to you, I turned a beloved character from an icon into a crotchety old hermit milking space cows.”
“Yeah, I saw,” I said. “Boy, fans were not happy with that.”
“You said that by denying them what they wanted, they would appreciate the originality.”
I sighed. “No, I said that if you subvert their expectations, giving them something different, but with enough similarities, then they would follow your lead. And then, by knocking out the ending by returning to the familiar at the last moment, they would praise your genius.”
The voice sounded confused. “What’s the difference?”
“You dropped the ball. Especially in the ending.”
“Hey!” the voice said. “There are a lot of fans who think I’m a genius.”
“And there are people who think The Dark Knight is a great Batman movie. Truth is, they’re wrong. It was a great Joker movie. Batman was horrible and the most boring thing on the screen.”
“Oh, so you’re some kind of critic?” the voice asked.
“Don’t change the subject,” I sighed. “You denied the fans what they wanted at every opportunity. That one fellow, the nervous wreck in the first movie, well, you kept him exactly the same so that girl could be the brave and righteous one. You completely forgot that he was kidnapped and turned into a child slave and soldier. He should have had way more motivation than she had. Next, you got rid of the villain without so much as an afterthought or even a hint of an explanation of who he was.”
“The villain doesn’t matter.”
“You know who you’re talking to, right?”
“Okay, that’s fair.”
“And if nothing else,” I explained, “maybe you could have had the icon actually show up, defeat the young bad guy, but get wounded so the young bad guy escapes.”
“And then what? Hmm? Where does the story go next?”
“Off the top of my head, the royal woman tosses the keys to the famous ship to the new girl, then goes out to stand with the icon. The icon and the royal finish off the last of the foot soldiers. Knowing it’s not enough, together they reach out and pull down the flagship from space. As it’s crashing, have the icon look at twin suns, reflect, smile, then turn to her and say ‘I love you.’ Then she smiles back and says ‘I know.’ Boom. Nerd orgasms in every theater. The old characters die in a blaze of glory and set up the new cast. ”
There was silence at the other end of the phone. Again, I sighed.
“Look, just give the franchise back to the first guy and see if he can, for once, follow through with his mystery box bullshit.”
“You’ll be hearing from my lawyers,” the voice threatened.
“And I’ll bring the chainsaws,” I said.
“What?”
I hung up the phone and shook my head. “Some people just don’t understand the gifts I give them.”
Sophia smirked at me. “The movie was almost exactly the script you gave them, you know that.”
I giggled. “Yeah. I know.”
“Then why’d you do it? I thought you loved that franchise?”
“I do,” I told her, lighting a cigarette. “But I love my original trilogy. Everything after has been meh at best. And sabotaging it for future generations has been fun.”
“Agreed. But why?”
“Because they should be creating something new on their own. Something original instead of mining existing works for ideas.”
“You’ve read your own work, haven’t you, sir?” Sophia asked accusingly.
“Do as I say, not as I do.” I smiled.
“So you intentionally ruined the movie?”
“It’s the little things that make me smile,” I said with a shrug. “Besides, some weirdos actually liked it.”
“Why?”
“They’re idiots?” I offered. Reaching into my desk, I pulled out a large stack of bound papers.
“What’s that?”
“The real script,” I said. “The one I wrote with all the good ideas I just told him. I have the details programmed into the holo-bay. You want to go watch the good version?”
“What’s different?” Sophia asked.
“It doesn’t suck.”
“That’s all I needed to hear,” Sophia said as she stood. “I’ll make the popcorn with the fake butter.”
“So, how was this last adventure?” I asked, changing the subject.
“You know, better than it had any right to be,” she admitted.
“So, can I expect a five star from you?”
“Oh sir . . . no.”
I shrugged. “Worth a try.”
Sophia looked at her phone and her face darkened. “Oh, shit.”
“What’s the matter? Amazon won’t let you post your shit review without a verified purchase?”
“What? No. I wouldn’t do that two books in a row. No, this is serious.”
I narrowed my eyes. “What is it?”
“I just got an email from the primordial titan we lease the dimension from.”
“MKG? And?”
“We’re being evicted.”
The End
. . . Jackson Blackwell will return in Villains Defeat.
About the Author
M. K. Gibson is a husband, father, a retired USAF MSgt and a lifetime geek. Ever since he saw the Rankin-Bass The
Hobbit movie in 1980, all he ever wanted to do was create and tell fantastical stories.
M. K. Gibson lives in Mt. Airy, MD with his wife, and first-line editor, Valerie, their son Jack, their schnauzer Murphy, newfoundland Sully and their cat Mini.
Follow M. K. Gibson on Twitter at @GibsonMK1, Facebook author page and read updates and insane blogs at MKGibson.com.