Love, Honor, and Betray

by Roby, Kimberla Lawson

  “Well, if there are no more questions,” Elder Jamison said, after another hour had passed, “then I think we can adjourn.”

  Soon after, everyone slid out of the pews, shook hands with each other, and headed out of the sanctuary.

  “Pastor, are you feeling any better?” Anise asked him. She normally called him Curtis, but whenever they were at church and around other members, she used his given title.

  “I’ll be fine.”

  “Well, if you’re not feeling well, maybe you should call Mom and just ask her to keep Curtina overnight for you.”

  “No, I’m good.”

  “Okay, but I know Mom would be fine with doing it.”

  “I know she would. But by the time I pick Curtina up and get her home, she’ll be ready for bed, anyway.”

  “All right, well, I’m heading out, and you take care of yourself,” she said, hugging him.

  “I will, and you, too.”

  Curtis watched as Anise walked away and couldn’t help wondering how she and Charlotte could be first cousins yet be so very different. He wondered why Charlotte didn’t have the same kind of heart Anise had or care about others the way Anise did.

  “Pastor, I know you’re not feeling well,” Raven said, now standing before him, “and I’m really sorry to have to bother you with this. But if you don’t mind, I need you to sign a couple of documents.”

  “Sure, let’s head up to my study now.”

  “I’ll stop by my office to get the file and will be right in.”

  Curtis shook a few more hands, said a few more good-byes, and then met Raven in his office.

  “These aren’t anything major,” she said. “Just the normal monthly authorizations for a few special items a couple of the departments are in need of.”

  Curtis skimmed the sheets in front of him, and she was right. They weren’t anything out of the ordinary or overly important, so he wondered why his signature couldn’t wait until tomorrow. Still, he went ahead and signed them.

  “Here you go,” he said, closing the folder and passing it back to her.

  “Thanks. And if you don’t mind, I’d like to talk to you about something personal. I know you’re not feeling well, so this won’t take very long.”

  “Sure. Go ahead.”

  Raven inhaled and exhaled audibly. “Okay, the deal is this. For some time now, I’ve tried my best to ignore my attraction to you, but it’s now to the point where it’s unbearable.”

  Curtis leaned back in his chair. He was shocked, to say the least, but he let her continue.

  “I know you’re married and that you’re a wonderful man of God, but I can’t help the way I feel.”

  “You’re right,” Curtis said. “I’m married, and I want to remain that way.”

  “I understand that, but I just couldn’t keep this to myself any longer. I’ve been struggling with the idea of whether I should tell you, but today after I left your office, I decided I had to. Especially when everything in me says that you’re not happy at home. I don’t know what’s going on, but I just have this feeling that you deserve someone so much better than a woman like Charlotte.”

  Curtis wanted to tell her that she was out of line, but the sad thing about her comments was that he had to agree with her. He said nothing, though, and his silence must have made Raven uncomfortable because she quickly stood up.

  “I’m really sorry, Pastor. I’m so sorry, and I hope you’ll somehow be able to forgive me.”

  She backed away from his desk and then left altogether.

  Curtis watched her every move and finally had to admit something to himself. He was attracted to her, too. He’d known it ever since this morning when she’d come into his office, but he’d thought about her even more ever since that big blowup between him and Charlotte this afternoon. He’d had all kinds of thoughts. Sinful thoughts and the kind he wasn’t very proud of.

  Thing was, though, he really did love his wife and wanted to remain faithful to her. He wanted them to be happy and enjoy their life to the fullest, and he wasn’t ready to give up on that happening. He’d been more upset with Charlotte today than he’d been in a long time, but during the business meeting he’d reminisced on all the good times they’d shared. He’d thought about all the laughs, all the fun, and all the joy they’d given each other, and while she’d said some pretty harsh things to him earlier, he still wanted to keep trying. He told himself that Charlotte loved him as much as he loved her, and that she would come around. Eventually, anyway. His prayer was that she would suddenly wake up one day, that she would realize how wrong she’d been about Curtina, that she would learn to love her, and that their problems as a whole would be solved. Curtis believed all of this and more—because if he didn’t, he knew they were doomed.

  Chapter 11

  It was shortly after eight p.m., and Charlotte was glad she no longer felt hung over. She’d taken a very long nap, and now she was signed onto Facebook and loving every moment of it. She’d made the decision to join this particular social network not even two months ago, but she was certainly very glad she had. For a long time, she hadn’t seen what all the raves were about, not until her stepdaughter, Alicia, had insisted it was the best thing since the introduction of the Internet. She’d told her how wonderful it was reconnecting with childhood friends and schoolmates, and how convenient it was being able to communicate with anyone you wanted to on a regular basis.

  Still, for a matter of months Charlotte hadn’t thought it was for her, but as of late, she’d found she could barely do without it. She wasn’t addicted per se, but she was on for at least sixty minutes or so every single day—and this evening she’d already been on for nearly four hours. She’d been making and accepting friend requests, commenting on a number of different status updates, and searching for other family and friends who might be members as well.

  Charlotte continued browsing for folks she knew, including mere acquaintances, but smiled when she came across her cousin Dooney’s name. Of all people. Drug-dealing, hustling Dooney. She was actually pleasantly surprised, because even though Dooney lived a life she would never live, he was one of her favorite family members, and she loved him. He was loyal, too. And she would always be indebted to him for vandalizing Tabitha’s house. He’d risked being caught and arrested, all because he wanted to help save Charlotte’s marriage to Curtis, and Charlotte didn’t know many people who would be willing to do that. Charlotte clicked on the Friend Request link on Dooney’s page, but then she couldn’t help searching for Michael Porter, a guy she’d dated just before getting back together with Curtis. At the time, Matthew had only been seven, so she hadn’t spent nearly as much time with Michael as she would have liked, but she’d never forgotten about him.

  She wondered how he was doing these days, so when the search engine listed a number of members with his exact same name, she scrolled through all the photos until she found his. The man still looked just as good as ever, and it only took her seconds to remember how intense their lovemaking had been. She remembered how they hadn’t been able to get enough of each other whenever they’d been together. The only problem was, he’d been married and unwilling to get a divorce; thus she’d moved on with Curtis without any regrets.

  Now, though, she could barely click on the link to his Facebook page fast enough. She wanted to see if he had his privacy options set in a way where only his current Facebook friends could read his wall postings or if basically anyone could view them. She smiled when she saw that she could in fact read some of his most recent updates, then clicked on his Info tab to see what personal information she could find out. Interestingly enough, not much had changed. He still resided in the Chicago area, still worked in investment brokering; he loved watching old movies, loved golfing, and, yes, he was still very married.

  Charlotte read as much as she could about him, but when she could no longer fight her desire to contact him directly, she clicked on the link that would allow her to send him a private message—a behind t
he wall sort of way of communicating with Facebook members when you didn’t want anyone else seeing what you had to say.

  When the window opened, Charlotte began typing her note.

  Hey Michael,

  How are you? I’m sure my contacting you will come as a huge surprise, but I do hope you are doing well. It’s been a long time, but since I came across your name here on Facebook, I thought I’d send you a quick hello.

  Take care and hope to hear back from you soon.

  Charlotte

  Charlotte reread her message, checking for any typos, and hit the Send button. Then she returned to her home page and browsed the comments of friends who had also posted new statuses. She immediately saw one from Alicia that said, “God has given me a second chance with the best man in the whole wide world, so life truly doesn’t get any better than this.” Charlotte smiled because she knew Alicia was talking about her first husband, Phillip, and the fact that they’d been seeing each other again exclusively. They’d had a very painful breakup, which had all been because Alicia had started sleeping with a successful drug dealer named Levi Cunningham. But now she and Phillip were working on a brand-new relationship with each other. After her divorce from Phillip, however, things had only gotten worse because she’d quickly married that horrible JT. The man had been the biggest whoremonger on this side of hell, even worse than Curtis had been at one time. So everyone had been thrilled when Alicia’s marriage to him had only lasted a few months, and she’d been able to walk away without children or any other JT Valentine connection.

  Charlotte clicked on the Comment button and typed a response:

  You couldn’t have said it better, Alicia, and I’m so happy for you and Phillip!

  Alicia answered right away, thanking her. Just then, though, Charlotte saw that she had a new message in her inbox, so she clicked on the icon. It was from Michael, and she couldn’t believe he’d responded so quickly. Strangely, she felt a little nervous but opened his note so she could see what he had to say.

  Hey you,

  This really is a very pleasant surprise, and I’m so glad you made the effort to contact me. I still think about you from time to time, and I’ve always wondered how things were going with you.

  Charlotte knew Michael was only trying to be kind, because there was no doubt that, like most other people, he surely knew about the many public scandals she and Curtis had found themselves involved in.

  Well, I won’t keep you, but I do hope we can catch

  up and try to stay in touch. I mean, isn’t Facebook

  amazing?

  Michael

  Charlotte hit the Reply button and typed another note.

  Yes, Facebook is wonderful, and I really would like to stay in touch with you, Michael.

  A minute or so passed, and Charlotte saw yet another message from him.

  So if you don’t mind my asking, how’s married life treating you? And yes, before you ask, I am still married to Sybil but we’re basically only going through the motions.

  Charlotte wasn’t sure how to respond to his question. Part of her wanted to bare her soul and tell him how miserable she’d been lately with Curtis, but instead, all she said was:

  I’m sorry to hear that and hope things get better for the two of you.

  She waited for Michael’s response.

  I appreciate your well wishes, but you still haven’t answered my question.

  Charlotte hesitated but knew she had to type something.

  You know how it is. Marriage can be great on certain days and not so great on others.

  She thought about how much easier this would have been had she sent him a friend request right from the start, because then they’d simply be able to chat in real time by instant message.

  Michael’s next note said:

  I’m sorry to hear that, and I may as well admit that I have heard rumors and know things haven’t always gone so well between you and your husband. But I was hoping maybe you were happy now.

  Charlotte heard Curtis’s truck entering the garage and knew it was time to end her conversation.

  Thanks so much. But hey, it was really great chatting with you, however, I have to get going now. We’ll connect again soon, though, okay?

  Michael told her yes in another message and to have a good evening.

  Charlotte signed off of Facebook altogether but then sat wondering how her life might have turned out had she continued dating Michael and not married Curtis. She wondered if maybe Michael would have eventually left his wife. Probably not, at least not back then, anyway, but she couldn’t help wondering if he would have the courage to leave her now. Charlotte wondered if maybe he’d had enough and couldn’t wait to get away from her.

  More than that, though, she wondered what it would feel like seeing him again. She knew it was wrong for her to even consider the idea of getting together with any of her ex-boyfriends, but she needed someone to talk to besides her best friend, Janine, or her mom. She needed to talk to someone she felt comfortable with. Not someone like that guy Tom from last night, but someone like Michael. Someone who knew her from back in the day. At least as far back as eleven years ago, anyway.

  And she would see him, too—that was, if Curtis didn’t do something about this Curtina situation. Charlotte would live like a single woman if Curtis didn’t man up and do the right thing.

  He would man up or deal with the consequences.

  Chapter 12

  Curtis unlocked the door and carried Curtina into the house, and Matthew walked into the kitchen, greeting them.

  “Maaattt,” Curtina said, smiling.

  Matthew took her into his arms. “Hey, little girl. So how was your day today?”

  Curtina spoke in her own little language, and while she probably knew what she was saying, Curtis certainly didn’t and he knew Matthew didn’t either.

  “Is that right? Well, good for you,” Matthew told her, pretending that he understood every word she’d just said. Then he put her down, unzipped her hot pink coat, removed it, and picked her back up.

  “So how was school?” Curtis asked him.

  “Good. I had a really hard chemistry test, but I’m pretty sure I got an A. I did some mad studying for it, though.”

  “I’m sure you did fine, and having good study habits is why you’ve always gotten such excellent grades. Those study habits are also going to be of great help to you when you’re at Harvard a year and a half from now.”

  “I hope so. I also have this English project that I have to turn in on Friday, so I need to work on that every night until then. Oh and there is something else, Dad. There’s a rumor going around about one of the history teachers and one of his female students. Kids were saying that they’ve been sleeping together, and that Mr. Rush is going to be suspended until further notice. There were detec­tives inside the building and everything.”

  “That’s really too bad, Matt. But if the rumor is true, Mr. Rush deserves to lose his job and get jail time. The whole idea of a grown man doing something like that is beyond my understanding, and it’s just plain perverse.”

  “I don’t know why any girl would even take a second look at him, anyway. He’s always been a very nice man, but he’s pretty decrepit-looking.”

  “Nonetheless, that man has no business being with a minor. Period. And chances are, he probably figured out some way to manipulate her. It could have been something as easy as him threatening to give her a failing grade if she wouldn’t be with him. Men like that are sly and conniving, and there are women out there like that, too. There have been a good number of stories about female teachers and teenage boys as well.”

  “I know. Mom was telling me the same thing when I told her earlier. I just hope it’s not true about Mr. Rush, but if it is then you’re right, Dad, he should go straight to jail. And for a long time.”

  “Mommy up,” Curtina chimed in, pointing toward the ceiling.

  Matthew looked at her. “What? You wanna go up to see Mom?”


  Curtina nodded, so Matthew started upstairs, and Curtis followed behind them. He loved the way Matthew treated his sister, but he could only imagine the drama that was about to ensue once Charlotte saw her. Especially since Curtis and Charlotte had argued so intensely this afternoon about her mysterious night out drinking.

  When they entered the room, Matthew called out to his mother.

  “I’m in here, Matt,” she said from the bathroom.

  Curtis shed his suit jacket and tie. Matthew walked around the corner and past their closets, and Curtis could see Charlotte washing her face.

  “Mommyyyy!” Curtina said.

  She called out to Charlotte over and over, but Charlotte acted as though she didn’t see her.

  Curtina wiggled to get down, so Matthew lowered her onto the floor, and Curtina ran as fast as she could to Curtis—with a pitiful look on her face.

  Curtis grabbed her up. “It’s okay. Daddy loves you,” he said, but it was all he could do not to go off on Charlotte. To his surprise, though, when Matthew and Charlotte moved closer to where they were standing, Curtina made another sad attempt at trying to get Charlotte to notice her. Still, Charlotte ignored her again.

  This time, however, Matthew called her on it. “Mom, why do you keep acting like you don’t hear Curtina?”

  “No reason,” she said, barely able to look at Matthew.

  “But Mom, she keeps trying to talk to you, and I think you’re hurting her feelings.”

  “That’s exactly what she’s doing,” Curtis couldn’t re­sist saying, but Charlotte never as much as looked in his direction.

  “I don’t understand, Mom,” Matthew said, looking at her in amazement. He then took Curtina from his dad.