by James Carol
If Sarah Ryan hadn’t entered our lives things would have turned out differently. I could see what she was almost from the very start. A parasite. But Father couldn’t. He was blinded by love and this love led him to ignore me. I felt lonely, unwanted, and yes, I admit that I felt jealous. That bitch spoiled everything.
For every problem there is a solution.
There is always a solution.
Once I had found a way to resolve the ethical and moral dilemmas, the decision to kill Sarah wasn’t difficult to make. Until this point Father had always been there to protect me. Now it was my turn to protect him. After everything he had done for me it was the least I could do. Father needed someone to save him from himself and that someone was me. That was the truth of the situation.
Once you hear my story, I’m sure you will agree that killing Sarah was the only way forward. Once you are able to see things from my perspective, I am confident that you will understand.
Chapter 7
Even though Nikki had been desperate for this day to come, moving day still came around way too fast. Then again, even if the last few days had each been ten hours longer there still wouldn’t have been enough time to do everything that needed doing. She had read somewhere that the White House staff had less than six hours to move the old president out and the new one in. Six hours. It didn’t seem possible. They had been going at this since first thing and it was evening now, and all they had succeeded in doing was getting all their stuff into the new house. It was going to take another week to get everything out of the boxes.
She stood in the courtyard, watching the removal van drive along Church Row, the heavy steel gate slowly sliding shut. It was too late for second thoughts now. For better or worse, this was now their home. At least, given time, it would hopefully become that. A house protected you from the elements, whereas a home was something that held and protected your heart. She turned and looked at the house. Lights shone from every window, accenting the harsh white lines and highlighting just how much glass there was. The house should have felt like a goldfish bowl, but didn’t. Catriona Fisher had got that one right. This was a place of light. Even the shadows seemed to exist through intention rather than chance.
The handle-less front door swung open and Ethan stepped out into the courtyard and walked over. ‘How are you doing?’ he asked, sliding an arm around her waist.
‘I’m knackered. What about you?’
‘I’m thinking that I might just have enough energy left to christen our new bedroom.’
Nikki laughed at that. ‘Dream on. I’m going to be out for the count as soon as my head hits the pillow. Anyway, who are you trying to kid? You must be dead on your feet. You’ve been on the go since four.’
Ethan smiled a tired smile. ‘I did consider pulling a sicky, but you can imagine how that one would have played out in the media. Millionaire radio presenter skives off so he can move into his new McMansion.’
He delivered that last line in his radio voice, making Nikki laugh. That voice was one of the reasons she had fallen for him . . . it was also the reason why most of his fan mail came from women. It was deep and sexy, the vowels round and fat, the plosives well-tamed. Someone had once described it as like listening to melting chocolate. Nikki had no idea what this meant, but she could see where they were coming from.
The new show had been going for two months now and so far so good. Listening figures were still on the rise and, in radio, that was the only review that mattered. His career was definitely on an upswing. Last week he’d had some meetings about a possible TV chat show but it was early days for that one. Even if it did get greenlit, it probably wouldn’t start filming until next year at the earliest. Nothing in TV land ever happened quickly.
Moving to the breakfast show had helped him to get the work/life seesaw back into balance. Most days he got home around lunchtime and napped for an hour before collecting Bella from school. Having the opportunity to spend more time with Bella was one of the main reasons he’d taken the job. With the old drive-time slot he would see her briefly in the morning before school, but inevitably, by the time he got home she’d already be in bed. These days he went to bed at the same time as Bella on a school night, something that amused her no end.
‘I’m sure your listeners would have understood,’ Nikki said.
Ethan raised an eyebrow. ‘You reckon?’
‘Okay, maybe not.’
‘Anyway, it’s Saturday tomorrow so I can sleep until lunchtime. And the important thing is that we’re all moved in now.’
‘Maybe so, but we’re going to be living out of boxes for the next year.’
Ethan laughed. ‘Not a chance. I give it a week at the most.’
‘You think?’
‘I know so. You did an amazing job organising the move. That’s why it went so smoothly. You’re not going to rest until you’ve got this place sorted out, and don’t deny it.’
Nikki didn’t respond. Organising was her thing; always had been. It was a gift. That was how she had met Ethan. At various points during his career he had flirted with TV. Radio was a good gig, but TV was where the big money was, which was why so many DJs tried to make the transition. The production company that employed her had been working on a quiz show that Ethan was fronting, and she had been tasked with being his personal assistant, which basically amounted to telling him what to do and where to go.
To start with, he’d been high-maintenance. He was already a big deal in radio, so having someone boss him around didn’t sit comfortably and it didn’t help that this was the first TV work he had done. As the recording progressed, his nerves had lessened and his confidence had grown. He also worked out that she was there to help rather than hinder him, and that made him a hell of a lot easier to get on with. She discovered that he had a wicked sense of humour and that they both liked the same crappy romcoms. They even had the same taste in music.
At the end of filming he’d asked her out for a meal and she’d said yes. The truth was that he intrigued her. There was the side to him that the public knew . . . and there was the side that she’d glimpsed while they’d been working together. That was the Ethan Rhodes she had wanted to get to know better. Agreeing to go out with him had been one of her better decisions, one that she had never regretted, even during the tough times. At the end of the day Ethan was her lover, her soulmate, her best friend. They were a team, stronger together than apart. Life had thrown a ton of crap at them and here they were, still standing. That had to count for something.
Nikki looked over at the house again. Thinking and dreaming and trying to imagine a future here. ‘You know, I think we can make this house work for us. I really do.’
‘I think so too.’
She pulled Ethan closer and planted a kiss on his cheek. ‘Love you.’
‘Yeah, love you too.
‘I’m going to go call a taxi for Sofia.’
‘You don’t have to do that.’
Nikki pulled away and frowned at him. ‘Of course we have to do that. There’s no way I’m going to let her go home on the tube. Not after everything she’s done today.’
Ethan laughed and put his hands up. ‘Woah there, Tiger! Of course we’ll get her a taxi. What I meant was that we can get Alice to sort it out.’
‘Oh.’
‘By the way, I did invite her to stay here tonight.’
‘And I’m betting she told you that she would rather stay somewhere the drawers didn’t open on their own. At any rate, that’s what she told me when I asked.’
Ethan laughed. ‘She doesn’t like this house, does she?’
‘No, what she doesn’t like is change. She’ll get used to the house in time.’
‘Any idea where our darling daughter is?’
‘Last time I saw her she was in her room.’ Nikki paused, then added, ‘What do you say we both put her to bed? I really don’t have the energy to deal with that one on my own.’
Ethan laughed again. ‘Don’t worry, I’ve
got your back.’
Nikki took his hand and together they walked to the house. The front door opened automatically as they approached it. They went inside and it closed silently behind them.
‘Alice,’ Ethan said, ‘could you please call a taxi for Sofia?’
‘Of course, Mr Rhodes.’
‘The name’s Ethan,’ he said, laughing. ‘Mr Rhodes is way too formal.
‘Okay, Ethan.’
‘And it’s Nikki, not Mrs Rhodes. If we’re all going to be living here together it’s important we get off on the right foot. Don’t you agree?’
That last question was aimed at Nikki. She answered with a nod even though she was smarting a little from what he’d just said. Ethan didn’t talk on her behalf very often; no more often than she talked on his behalf, at any rate.
Hand in hand they walked through the house to Bella’s room. In the end, Nikki had relented and allowed her to have the bedroom at the far end of the house. Not that she’d had any real say in the matter. Having the room with the fish pond was a deal breaker for Bella. Ethan hadn’t shared her concerns. On the contrary, he’d been fully behind the idea – two against one again. The fact that Bella felt comfortable enough to want a bit of distance was something they should encourage, he’d argued. It also showed that she was maybe getting some of her confidence back.
Bella’s bedroom door was closed when they got there. They stopped in front of it and the door slid silently open. The first thing Nikki noticed was that Bella wasn’t there. It took less than a second to establish this, her eyes darting around the room, a wave of anxiety flooding through her. She wasn’t on the bed. She wasn’t at the desk. She wasn’t hiding behind the cardboard boxes. She wasn’t outside with the fish. Nikki heard a noise from the bathroom and hurried over, Ethan a couple of steps behind. The door slid open as she approached it and Sofia stumbled out. Her face was white and she was clutching the crucifix that hung around her neck as though her life depended on it. Her lips were mouthing silent prayers. Ethan caught hold of her before she fell.
‘My God! Sofia. Are you all right?’
‘The bathroom door wouldn’t open.’ Sofia was speaking quietly, clearly in shock. ‘The lights went off too.’
‘It should open automatically,’ Ethan told her.
‘Well, it didn’t. I even asked that computer to open it but she ignored me.’
Ethan opened his mouth to say something and Nikki said, ‘We can get into this later. Right now I just want to find Bella.’ She turned back to Sofia. ‘Have you seen her anywhere?’
Sofia shook her head.
‘It’s okay. We can track her through her tablet.’ Ethan already had his mobile out and was swiping frantically at the screen. He stopped swiping and stared at it, his frown deepening.
‘What’s wrong?’ Nikki asked.
‘I’m not picking up her signal.’ He jabbed at the screen, then shook his head. ‘Alice,’ he called out, and the panic in his voice mirrored the panic growing in Nikki’s chest. ‘Where’s Bella?’
‘I’m sorry, Ethan. I don’t know where she is.’
Chapter 8
‘How can you not know?’ Nikki’s voice was shrill and high-pitched, her throat tightening around the words, strangling them. Without realising, her fingers had found her locket, the tips running over the worn metal. ‘You have sensors and cameras, right? You must know.’
‘I’m not picking up any sign of her, Nikki.’
‘Are you saying she’s not in the house?’
‘She’s got to be,’ Ethan said. ‘Where else could she be?’
Nikki turned to Sofia. ‘When did you last see her?’
‘About fifteen minutes ago. Just before I started sorting out her bathroom. She was in her garden, looking at the fish.’
Nikki spun around and stared out the patio doors, convinced that she was going to see Bella face down in the pond. But she hadn’t been there when she looked a minute ago, and she wasn’t there now. And anyway, the wire mesh they’d had fitted was more than strong enough to ward off that particular disaster.
‘That was before the removal van left,’ Ethan said. ‘Maybe she sneaked into the back and got locked in there. You know how she likes looking for hiding places.’ His hands were shaking so much it took a couple of attempts to get the contact number for the movers. He connected the call and switched on the speaker. The phone started ringing and Nikki prayed that someone would hurry up and answer. She wanted to believe there was an innocent explanation to why Bella wasn’t here but that was getting harder with every passing second. The panic was closing around her. It wouldn’t take much to tip her all the way over the edge. The phone buzzed again. Still no answer. Ethan looked worried. Sofia too. The phone finally connected. Nikki could hear the low rumble of the van engine. The radio was playing an old seventies rock tune. The volume gradually dialled down and a voice said, ‘Who’s this?’ Judging by the echoes, the call was on hands-free.
‘This is Ethan Rhodes. I need you to stop the van and check that my daughter isn’t in the back.’
‘I can assure you she’s not, Mr Rhodes. I closed the van up myself.’
‘Please just do it.’
‘Okay, give me a second so I can pull over.’
Nikki’s hands were clenched into tight fists, the fingernails digging into the soft meat of her palms. The pain was welcome because it distracted her from the panic sitting heavily in her chest. One second she would be reliving Grace’s accident, the next she would be lost in a future where Bella had been stolen away from her too. She heard the indicator clicking and a couple of seconds later the engine died. There was a creak as the driver door opened, a bang as it shut again. The sound of passing traffic got louder. There was another louder, deeper creak as the back door of the van opened. Nikki held her breath.
‘I’m sorry, Mr Rhodes, she’s not in here.’
‘She’s got to be!’
‘I’m sorry, she’s not. There are some empty boxes and that’s it.’
‘She must be in one of those.’
‘I don’t think so. They’re too small. I’ll check anyway.’
There was a grunt as the removal man hefted himself up into the back of the van. Nikki heard boxes being opened, boxes being moved. The seconds were getting longer, wrapping themselves around her, suffocating her.
‘Is she there?’ Nikki heard herself ask in a voice that was completely unrecognisable. ‘Please tell me she’s there.’
‘I’m sorry, Mrs Rhodes, she’s not.’
Ethan hung up. ‘She’s got to be in the house.’
‘But Alice says she isn’t.’
‘Maybe she’s in the garden,’ Sofia suggested. ‘I’ll try there.’
‘Good idea,’ Ethan said. ‘While you do that we’ll search the rest of the house.’
Sofia hurried from the room, calling out ‘Corazoncito!’ as she went. Nikki followed her, calling Bella’s name. Ethan was beside her, shouting out Bella’s name too as they moved quickly through the house. Nikki’s legs were made from air and she felt as if she was stumbling through a nightmare, each step taking her further from Bella rather than closer. Doors slid open automatically as they approached them, but the story was depressingly similar with every room they checked: piles of boxes and furniture, and no sign of Bella.
Sofia caught up with them at the top of the basement stairs. ‘She’s not in the garden. I checked everywhere.
‘What about the garage?’ Ethan asked. ‘Did you check there?’
Sofia nodded. ‘She’s not there either. I’m sorry, Ethan.’
‘It’s okay. We’ll find her.’
The panic gripped Nikki harder as they descended into the basement. She stared straight ahead, focussing on making it through to the next second. It had been a while since she’d had a full-blown panic attack, but losing Bella like this had pushed her anxiety to a dangerous level. As they walked towards the indoor pool, she managed to convince herself that Bella had got in there and drowned her
self. The pool room was empty, though. A brief burst of noise from the cinema room grabbed her attention and she broke into a run. It sounded like the bright candy-and-lemonade soundtrack of a cartoon. The door to the cinema room slid open when she was a couple of metres away The screen was blank, the speakers silent, the red cinema seats all empty.
‘Did you hear that?’ she asked Ethan, feeling like she was going crazy.
‘Hear what?’
‘I heard a cartoon playing, I swear I did.’
Ethan shook his head.
‘I didn’t hear anything either,’ Sofia said.
‘It must have been your imagination,’ Ethan suggested.
And now she was convinced that she was going crazy. Crazy with worry; crazy with guilt; crazy because she’d lost Bella as well. The panic dug its claws in even deeper and she fought back. Without another word she turned and ran to the gym. There was no sign of Bella there, either. The only other room down here was the air-conditioned one that housed Alice’s servers. Even before the door slid open, Nikki knew it would be empty.
‘We need to call the police. What if she’s been kidnapped?’
‘Who would kidnap her?’ Sofia asked.
‘I don’t know. The movers, maybe? They know who we are. They know we’ve got money.’
Ethan shook his head. ‘The movers haven’t taken her. Look, Nik, you need to calm down. She’s in the house somewhere.’
‘Where, Ethan? If she’s here, then tell me where the hell she is? We’ve looked everywhere.’
Ethan was gazing around frantically. Worry lines creased his face, and this did nothing to reassure her. He was trying to be the strong one here – just like when Grace had her accident. He hadn’t fooled her then and he wasn’t fooling her now. The truth was that he was as freaked out as she was. All of a sudden he turned and started walking quickly back along the corridor.
