Winner Takes All

by Katie Price

‘Gotcha. Wait there.’ Jas ran off and reappeared in an old Britney Spears t-shirt, a souvenir from seeing her play at the O2 with her sisters almost a decade ago. She busied herself making tea for Meg, talking about Ibiza and then doing her make-up while sitting on the sofa, using a hand-mirror.

  ‘Don’t you want to start getting ready? What are you wearing? Raid my wardrobe if you like. If you can find anything Lila hasn’t poached, that is. If she thinks for one second I’m going to forget that my Maje floral top is missing, she has another think coming!’

  ‘Actually, Jas, I’m absolutely exhausted. Do you mind if I don’t come tonight? I just don’t feel like myself. I don’t want to drag you down.’

  ‘Oh, babe, of course. Don’t come if you’re feeling rotten. I’ve got loads of time to catch up with you. Can I get you anything?’

  ‘Thanks, love. Just my luck to get sick before a much-needed night out. I think I just need to rest.’

  Jas gave her a hug. ‘You’re here, that’s the main thing. Now all we need is to get Lila out of her grotty squat. I’m going to go and throw my dress on.’

  Meg followed Jas and watched as she wriggled into her dress, did up her black strappy heels and finished her look with a slick of lipgloss.

  ‘Lila’s moved out of that flat, you know. She’s living back at Mum and Dad’s.’

  ‘Oh, is she?’ Jas was hurt that she didn’t even know where her sister was living. Then she smiled. ‘Wait, does that mean she’s not taking on the job at awful Richard’s office?’

  Meg sat down at the end of the bed. ‘Nope. Says she’s done with London now.’

  ‘Oh, for God’s sake.’ Jas thought her sister was just being dramatic again.

  ‘Richard tried it on with her a couple of weeks ago.’

  ‘What!’

  ‘Yep. Took her to some club, got completely shit-faced and tried to get her back to his flat. When she turned him down he launched into a massive tirade, slagging her off and saying we were all cheap money-grabbing whores. Then he buggered off and left her with a £200 bar tab.’

  Jas slumped down onto the bed next to Meg, shaking her head in disbelief. ‘What an utter arsehole.’

  ‘Yep. I went round to Mum and Dad’s and she told me all about it. She feels really scared by the whole thing, Jas. It’s made her want to leave London. Mum and Dad don’t know what’s really been going on, she just turned up there a couple of days ago with her bags, saying she was done with the place. She’s worried about seeing you, though. Thought you’d never forgive her for hanging out with him.’ Meg burst into tears. ‘God, what’s wrong with me? I’m an emotional wreck these days.’

  Jas gave her a hug. She was annoyed with Lila for hanging out with Richard. And not just that, but also siding with him against Jas. But while Lila was certainly old and bright enough to know better, picturing a drunk, sleazy Richard with his hands all over her little sister made Jas’s blood boil.

  ‘I mean, isn’t that like incest anyway, trying it on with her? Seriously, what is wrong with that guy?’

  ‘Lila reckons he’s unhinged. Says she’s never known anyone act so creepy and intense.’

  ‘I need to phone her.’ Jas dialled but Lila’s mobile went straight to answerphone. She dialled her parents’ landline next but no answer from there either. ‘Shit! Where are they?’ She paced furiously up and down the room.

  ‘Calm down. They’ve probably just popped to the pictures or out for dinner.’

  ‘How was she yesterday?’

  ‘Pleased to be home. She feels guilty and very silly. I think mainly she wants to forget about it. She’s worried about how you’re going to react. She asked me not to tell you, but how could I not?’

  It was true. Meg and Jas had never kept secrets from each other.

  Jas’s phone bleeped, alerting her that the Addison Lee car she’d ordered was here to collect her. ‘Well, I can’t go out now.’

  ‘Of course you can. It’s a big night for you and you deserve it.’

  ‘I’m not in the mood. I want to speak to Lila and I should look after you.’

  ‘I’m fine. Lila is fine. You staying home while I snooze in front of Coronation Street isn’t going to change anything. Call Lila again from the cab and if you don’t speak to her tonight, you will tomorrow.’

  The cab beeped angrily outside. Jas didn’t feel right about going out but Meg insisted she did and so, reluctantly, Jas got in the cab, promising she wouldn’t be late home. As the black SUV trawled though the London traffic, Jas impatiently tried to ring her younger sister, but continued to be put straight through to Lila’s voicemail. Then Jas’s phone rang with an incoming call and she answered immediately, hoping it would be Lila.

  ‘Jasmine, I’m sorry for ringing on a Saturday, but I’m on holiday at the start of next week, so wanted to give you the news as soon as possible.’

  ‘Oh, hello, Ralph. No worries. What’s up?’

  ‘Bad news, I’m afraid. Your court hearing has been postponed until November.’

  ‘What? How? Why? But … I’ve waited so long. They can’t do this!’

  ‘I’m afraid they can. It’s a judicial restriction. This is a very busy time of year and the judge had to go to another case. The next available date I could get was the twentieth of November. It’s only six weeks or so.’

  Easy for him to say. Six weeks felt like a lifetime to Jas. She felt sick to her stomach that she’d ever let Richard touch her; the fact she was still married to him made her feel physically ill.

  ‘As I’ve said before, this is low priority in terms of the family courts. It’s completely standard for a contested divorce hearing to take this long. I warned you, Jasmine.’

  ‘Twentieth of November,’ she said glumly, wondering how things could get any worse for her.

  At the party that night Jas stayed close to the bar, knocking back shots of tequila and ringing Lila incessantly, but each time it went to voicemail. Fortunately, the party was so lively no one seemed to notice how drunk she was getting. The entire entertainment floor of Channel 6 seemed to have shown up but Jas shied away from making small talk with anyone.

  She was in a foul mood. She felt helpless, useless and pathetic. She should have been there for Lila. Her own childish pride had stopped her from reaching out since their last argument. If she’d spoken to her sister sooner maybe none of this would have happened. How could Jas ever have married such a creep? She’d known Richard was a sleaze, but trying it on with her sister just to get at his wife seemed insane. She really hoped that he would be out of their lives before too long.

  Jas looked around. Her vision was decidedly blurry but there was no sign of Luke. Whatever logic was left in Jas’s head, it told her that phoning him was a good idea. It rang out. Jas phoned again. And again. After the fourth attempt she gave up, not wishing to embarrass herself any further. He obviously had no desire to speak to her. Just another thing in Jas’s life she’d messed up. She wobbled to the bar when she felt a familiar hand on the small of her back. She looked up to see Luke’s dark eyes staring down at her.

  ‘Whoa, you all right there? Looks like you’re struggling a bit, Whiteley.’

  ‘Luke! You’re here.’

  ‘I sure am. How about a strong black coffee for you, eh? Or a glass of water? I’m having a Diet Coke.’

  ‘White wine, please.’

  ‘Let’s start with water.’ Luke ordered from the bartender as Jas propped herself onto one of the stools. When the water came she turned her nose up and ordered a large white wine. Luke eyed her suspiciously.

  ‘Sorry I missed all your calls just now. I was parking the car. Figured you were here anyway.’

  ‘Parking the car? You’re not drinking?’

  ‘Nope. I’m playing rugby tomorrow with the lads so wanted to keep a clear head.’

  Jas rolled her eyes. Mr bloody Perfect.

  ‘I thought we should talk about what happened in Ibiza,’ started Luke. ‘I’m sorry for driving off like that but, as you
can imagine, it came as a shock. I needed some time to figure out how I felt about all this.’ Jas glugged her wine, half listening to him, half thinking how much she hated Richard. ‘Jas?’

  ‘Huh?’

  ‘Were you listening to me? I was saying we should grab a coffee and talk about all this. If you want to.’

  ‘Sure, let’s go.’ Jas knocked back almost a full glass of wine, after which she was so hammered she stood up only to fall directly back down again. Luke caught her.

  ‘I didn’t mean right now this second. Jesus, how much have you had to drink?’

  She pushed him aside. ‘Oh, piss off !’ This made a few heads turn.

  Monica appeared and quickly steadied her. ‘Babe, I think you should call it a night, yeah? Why don’t I ring for a cab?’

  ‘I’ll take her, I’ve got my car. I know her address.’

  ‘Thanks, Luke.’

  He led Jas outside. She shook her arm free. ‘Bloody men. You all think you know best.’

  ‘Okay,’ Luke said, patiently. ‘Come on, let’s get you home. My car’s just here.’

  The drive made Jas feel sick so she kept her eyes closed and they sat in silence until Luke pulled up outside her building.

  ‘Want to come inside for a coffee?’ she slurred.

  ‘I don’t think that’s the best idea.’

  Jas threw her hands in the air dramatically. ‘Fine, let’s talk here.’

  ‘Maybe tomorrow would be better, when you’ve slept this off ?’

  ‘Stop condescending me! That’s all you men do, isn’t it? If I’m not being patronised by you, it’s by Burrell. You want to control everything all the time, don’t you? You can’t stand it when things don’t go your way.’

  Luke looked at her in disbelief. ‘I don’t believe this. Look who’s throwing a tantrum about not getting her own way. Fine, let’s talk now. You should’ve told me you were married.’

  ‘No shit.’

  ‘It’s going to be like that, is it? God, you’re a nightmare. I thought we could try to sort things out but if this is what it’s like being with you, forget it. I’ve had enough crazy women in my time.’

  Jas was furious now. She knew she was throwing a full-on tantrum that she would no doubt regret tomorrow, but she’d never expected mild-mannered Luke to hit back with that. Her, crazy?

  ‘That’s your thing, isn’t it, Luke? I guess your ex and I have that in common. Crazy me, being married without telling you, and crazy her for aborting your baby. What a pair we are! I’m certainly more sympathetic to her now.’ She had no idea where that last sentence had come from but as soon as the words left her lips, Jas held her hand over her mouth in horror.

  ‘Get out.’

  ‘I didn’t mean that. I can’t believe I said that.’

  Luke looked straight ahead. ‘I said get out,’ he repeated.

  ‘I didn’t mean that. I’m drunk, I’m emotional, I found out something tonight that … well, come on, Luke.’

  ‘Jas, I can’t do this with you. The lies, the games, the tantrums. I’m not into all this drama.’

  ‘Neither am I!’

  ‘Really? I think you are. I don’t think we’re right for each other.’

  Jas didn’t know what to say to that. She glumly stepped out of the car, feeling disgusted by her own behaviour. What was wrong with her? No sooner had she closed the passenger door than Luke sped off. It was the second time that losing her temper had left her feeling wretched. But one thing was clear to her: this time she’d taken it too far.

  Chapter 35

  Jas was off work for the next few weeks while Mr Right was in deep editing mode. The last thing she needed was more time alone to spend moping around her flat, regretting her behaviour with Luke. The day after her blow-out argument with him she packed her bags and drove back up to Manchester with Meg, to stay with her parents and spend time with them, Meg and Lila. It had been months since Jas had been up there and all she wanted now was to see her family.

  Helen and Graham Whiteley had lived in the same house for over thirty years, ever since Helen was pregnant with Meg. It was in a quiet suburban street on the outskirts of the city. It wasn’t big; there were always two sisters sharing a room at one time, but it was home and always would be. Helen had decorated it beautifully and she and Graham kept the small garden immaculate.

  Meg pulled her Ford Ka into the driveway and Helen rushed out when she heard the sound of the engine.

  ‘Hello girls! Jas, come here and give your mum a big kiss. Graham, help Jas with her bags.’

  ‘I’ve got it Mum, it’s okay.’

  Graham, a sixty-six-year-old retired project manager for the local council, ushered Meg and Jas through into the living room, insisting he would take in any bags.

  ‘Hi, Dad.’

  ‘Hello, love. Come in, come in. Good to see you. Meg, is Oscar coming?’

  Having lived in a household of four women for twenty-five years, Graham was delighted when Meg married Oscar two years ago and had insisted they watch sport together every weekend. The girls always teased him.

  ‘He’s on his way, Dad, don’t worry. We know how much you love your favourite child!’

  Helen ordered Graham to go and make a pot of tea. ‘Jasmine, it has been months. Let me look at you. Oh, you look beautiful. Very tanned. I hope you were using sun lotion over in Ibiza? But you’re looking very skinny, too. We need to feed you.’

  ‘I’m fine, Mum.’

  ‘Meg, is your sister eating? She looks very skinny.’

  ‘Yes, Mum, she’s fine.’

  If there was one thing Helen loved, it was fussing over her family. She was an amazing cook and as soon as Jas walked through the house she was greeted with the sweet waft of something baking and her mouth watered.

  ‘What have you been making?’

  ‘Chocolate muffins. We thought as the whole family is here we could chill out for a bit together then go for a walk and after that I’ll do a nice roast chicken. How does that sound?’

  Jas felt instantly relaxed. Compared to her own flat, where there was generally nothing in the fridge except wine and cheese, coming to her parents’ house was like staying in a hotel. It was peaceful, cosy, and the supply of food was endless.

  ‘Meg, you look ever so pale, are you okay?’

  ‘To be honest, Mum, I’ve got a bit of a headache that hasn’t gone away. I feel utterly exhausted.’

  Jas looked at her sister with concern. ‘Still? You must be coming down with something. Why don’t you go and have a lie-down?’

  ‘A lie-down is a very good idea,’ put in Helen. ‘Go and lie down on our bed and I’ll come up with some peppermint tea. I wonder if it’s the same thing Lila has. She’s not been herself since she’s been back.’

  ‘I was just about to ask you,’ said Jas quickly. ‘What’s wrong with her? Is she okay?’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know,’ said Helen. ‘I think she’s exhausted, quite frankly. Living the big life in London, always out, never sleeping. It’s good for her to be home.’

  ‘Generation Snowflake!’ called Graham from the kitchen. ‘In my day we didn’t get exhaustion. They’re too entitled, this generation. You spoil them, Helen!’

  Helen batted this away as Meg and Jas smiled at each other. Nothing changed in this house. Jas got up. ‘I might go and check on Lila then, see how she’s doing.’

  ‘Tell her to get out of bed and come and say hello to her family!’ called Graham.

  Since the girls had moved out, Helen had redecorated their rooms. She loved having a project. Jas threw her bags into the room she’d shared with Meg for years. Long gone were the two single beds. In their place was a double bed with a turquoise quilt and matching cushions. Everything else was white.

  Jas gently knocked on Lila’s door and, not hearing an answer, let herself in. Lila’s room had been painted magnolia. The curtains were drawn and it smelt awfully musty. The window clearly hadn’t been opened in days. Jas could see a crumpled figure under
the bedsheets, snoring softly.

  ‘Lila?’ Jas rubbed her sister’s shoulders and waited for her to open her eyes before pulling open the curtains.

  ‘Ow!’ Lila squinted, pulling the pillow over her eyes.

  ‘Come on, little one, you need some light and fresh air in here. I brought you a cup of tea. And one of Mum’s muffins.’

  Lila removed the pillow and eyed her sister suspiciously. ‘Chocolate muffin?’

  ‘Uh-huh.’

  Lila sat up in bed and rubbed her eyes. She was so petite and looked so much younger than her twenty-five years.

  ‘Did Meg tell you?’ asked Lila, sheepishly.

  Jas nodded. ‘I’m so sorry for not being there for you, not listening to you … for everything. I feel responsible.’

  ‘You? I’m so, so sorry! I’m the awful one here. You’ve nothing to apologise for, this is all my stupid fault.’

  ‘No, this is all his fault, not ours,’ Jas corrected her. ‘But I feel responsible for letting him into our lives in the first place and then getting between us.’

  ‘You couldn’t have known what he’d turn out like. And you can’t be there for me all the time, Jas. As much as you want to protect me, I’m a grown woman and I need to make my own choices. I should have known better.’

  ‘Like I said, he is manipulative.’

  ‘You tried to warn me. You were only looking out for me and trying to protect me so please don’t feel bad about anything. All those terrible things I said to you …’

  ‘Forget about it.’

  ‘I didn’t mean any of it, sis. I was angry at the world. Richard made me think that I was entitled to all these things but it’s bullshit. I don’t deserve anything.’

  ‘But you’re okay, right? He didn’t hurt you, did he?’ ‘No, no, nothing like that.’ Lila went through her entire recent history with Richard, from bumping into him in Print Room to their heavy nights out. She even came clean about the after-party back at Jas’s flat, tearing up with shame as she did so.

  Jas rubbed Lila’s back softly. Her sister felt bad enough, and Jas knew she was sorry.

  Lila pulled her knees to her chest. ‘I just feel so stupid. I really fell for it. The glam treatment, the compliments. He made me feel so special and then, in the space of one night, so completely worthless. I guess it triggered some stuff in me. I started to reassess everything. The next day I knew I wanted to leave London and come home. I obviously couldn’t take that job at Curtis Stoddard if it meant I had to see Richard’s ugly mug every day.’