by Levine, Nina
“Cassia has caused issues for Lorelei and me, leaving Lorelei with the impression I’m going back to Cassia.”
Staring up at the ceiling, he says, “How bad is it?”
“Let’s just say I sat through five angry voicemails from Lorelei while she told me she hopes Cassia can give me what I’m looking for. She then refused to talk to me on the phone.”
He looks at me. “So, bad.”
I nod.
“When are you flying home to fix this with her?”
Frowning, I shake my head. “I’m not going home.”
He watches me silently for a few moments. “Don’t stay here on my account. I don’t want that shit on my conscience.” And here’s the moody bastard who always shows up in times like this. A little earlier than I’d expected.
A nurse interrupts us, and I leave the room so she can do what she needs to do. It’s perfect timing, because when he gets in this kind of mood, he goes looking for a fight. And as much as I try not to be provoked, Jack knows which buttons of mine to push.
I head down to the cafeteria and grab a coffee, trying to wake myself up. Lorelei’s on my mind, and although it’s barely nine in the morning in Sydney, I can’t stop myself from calling her. I need to have this conversation. I need her to know she’s misunderstood everything.
She answers on the third ring. “Ashton, it’s early.” Her tone is frosty, but I don’t blame her. I’d be furious if I was in her shoes.
However, I need to take charge of this conversation to ensure I get my point across. “I’m going to tell you what happened and you’re going to stay quiet and listen to every word I have to say. Are we clear?”
That gets her attention, and her frosty tone turns fiery. “You don’t get to boss me around anymore, so—”
“Lorelei,” I growl, “You need to stop fighting me and listen. There’s a hell of a lot more to this than you know.”
“I’ll tell you what I do know, Ashton. I know I’ve seen photos of you with Cassia. I know I’ve spoken with Cassia who you called while I was right there. And I also know your father announced his pleasure at the news. What could you possibly have to tell me that changes any of that?”
I’m both pissed off at what’s happened and turned on by her reaction to it. Lorelei has finally laid her cards on the table. She wants me and is willing to fight for me. And she’s jealous as hell over Cassia. While I don’t like the fact she’s hurt by that jealousy, it shows me she’s completely in this relationship with me. Now I just need to get her to listen to me.
“Jack has been admitted to hospital. I’ve flown to LA to be with him. That kiss you saw between Cassia and me? That was all her doing. I didn’t instigate it, and I sure as fuck didn’t want it. I have no idea who’s responsible for printing that story, but as soon as I find out, they won’t have a job. And as for me calling Cassia, that was bullshit. She was obviously trying to make you jealous.”
Silence. And then—“Oh… Oh God, I’m so sorry about Jack. Is he okay?”
This is one of the reasons why I love this woman. Although she’s upset and hurting, she’s more concerned about Jack than herself right now. I can’t name one woman I’ve dated who would have responded in this way.
“No, but we’re doing everything to help him be okay.”
She turns silent again, so I say, “I tried to call you before I left, and when I couldn’t get hold of you, I stopped by your place, but you weren’t home. I—”
“I dropped my phone in the toilet,” she blurts. “That’s why you couldn’t get hold of me. It wasn’t working. And I was at Sienna’s.” Her voice softens when she continues, “I’m sorry I left those voicemails. I honestly thought you’d chosen Cassia over me.”
“We need to get one thing straight, Lorelei. I will never choose Cassia again. Never. I love you. And if anything like this ever happens again, you need to wait until you’ve spoken with me before making any assumptions.”
“Well, you can see why I made those assumptions, right?” There’s the Lorelei I know—always arguing with me.
“Yes, but this could have all been avoided if you’d just waited for me to call.”
“I did wait. You didn’t call.”
“Are we going to sit here and spend the day arguing over this?”
“Could you maybe tell me you at least understand how I jumped to those conclusions?”
Truth be told, I could sit here and argue with her all day. I’d rather not, though, so I give her what she’s looking for. Hell, I’ll give her anything she needs at this point. “I understand how you jumped to those conclusions. I’m going to ensure Cassia never has the opportunity to put you in that position again. I promise you I will deal with her. And as for everything you said in your voicemails, you’ve got it right that I’m not used to dealing with women who don’t bend to my every demand. You challenge me some days, and you test the hell out of me. But if you ever change yourself for me, I will put you over my knee and spank that out of you. Any bending to be done in this relationship will be done by both of us. Not just by you. You will never have to fight for this relationship on your own. I will be right there with you fighting, because I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you. You are everything to me.”
Her response takes a moment. “You do realise I’m going to be challenging you forever, right? Like, if you think I’m ever going to take it easy on you, you’re dreaming. Although, this spanking thing you’ve threatened a couple of times now does sound good, so maybe I could be tempted to ease up a little until you take your hand to my ass.”
Fuck.
I’ve gone from tired to fully awake in less than a minute thanks to thoughts of my hand on her ass.
Before I have a chance to reply, she adds softly, “I love you, Ashton Scott, and I promise never to make assumptions again. And I’m going to fight for us, with you, forever.”
59
Lorelei
“I take it your day isn’t going so great,” Sienna says when she returns to our shared office on Monday afternoon. She’s been out with clients all day while I’ve been stuck in the office trying to put out fires. I’m annoyed because I’ve had to cancel my weekly beauty afternoon at the nursing home.
I drop my pen and lean back against my chair. Sighing, I shake my head. “Do I look that bad?”
She sits across from me, placing her laptop on the table. “Yeah, you really do. Is it Ashton again?”
At the mention of his name, I perk up a little. “No, he’s the one thing going right today. It’s everything else. Cranky tenants, my shitty insurance company, and Ryan Shandwick. Between them all, I just wanna go home and crawl into bed with chocolate.” I don’t see my Monday spin class happening today.
“What’s Ryan done? I thought you guys were working well together and that things were progressing nicely there?”
“He hasn’t done anything to me, but I found out this morning that one of the major investors pulled out over the weekend. It was Bob Darwin, who I kinda know through my grandmother. They used to do business together, and she always told me he was one of the good guys who could be trusted. Anyway, so I called him and asked why he pulled out. He told me he was bound by confidentiality clauses, but that I should tread carefully with this development. And now everything Ashton said is coming back to me, and I have a sick feeling in my stomach that somehow I missed something, and that I’ve made a really bad decision.”
“Are you thinking of pulling out of it, too?”
I swallow my uneasiness and shake my head again. “It’ll cost me so much to do that. I’m not sure if it’s the best course of action.” I want Ashton to look over this, and I wouldn’t hesitate to ask him if he wasn’t with Jack. But I don’t want to distract him from doing something far more important than looking over my business deal.
“So what’s the plan here?”
I stare at her in silence for a moment before placing my head on the table and saying, “I told you—bed and chocolate.”
&n
bsp; “Okay, so clearly we still need a plan for that. What’s going on with your tenant and insurance company? Have they stopped arguing with you over everything like toddlers?”
Lifting my head, I smile at her. “That’s exactly what this feels like. And no, they haven’t, but my tenant is coming around. There hasn’t been any graffiti for a while now, and no other problems, so she seems to have calmed down. Well, mostly. She’s still arguing for me to reimburse some of her rent because of the supposed disruption to her business.”
Sienna frowns. “Was there any disruption? I don’t recall you telling me about that.”
“Hardly any. She’s just playing hardball, so I’m playing it back. I’ve told her what I’m willing to give her, and if she wants to continue arguing, she can take it up with our lawyers. That’ll end up costing her more than she’ll get out of me.”
“I like it,” she says with a grin. “Changing the subject, I think we should go out tonight. We could have dinner at that little Italian place we love, and we could make plans for a girls’ weekend next month. It’s been too long since we’ve had one, and I’m in desperate need.”
“Me too,” I agree. “Italian sounds good. And I’m getting chocolate for later.” Ashton’s ringing me late tonight. Between him and chocolate, and time with Sienna, maybe I’ll feel less stressed over everything.
A knock on the glass wall of our office drags my attention from thoughts of chocolate. Turning, I find Boston entering.
“Hey,” he says. “Is now a good time?”
I hesitate with my answer, unsure how to proceed. The last time I saw him, he caused a huge divide between Ashton and me. And while I didn’t easily see it from Ashton’s point of view then, I do now. Ashton doesn’t want Boston in my life any more than I want Cassia in his, so I need to make my ex understand my future is not with him.
Walking towards him, I say, “Now is a very good time for us to talk.”
He reaches for me, his hand curling around my wrist. It’s a familiar move; this was how he used to greet me when we were together. That, and a kiss. “Yeah, I wanted to come over and make sure you’re okay.”
I pull my arm out of his hold. He’s obviously seen the papers over the weekend, and I’m getting the sense he’s maybe using this as a way to draw me closer to him. Whatever he’s doing, I’m not into it. “I’m fine, Boston. Don’t believe everything you read in the paper.”
My tone is cool, and he doesn’t miss the chill. His eyebrows pull together as he says, “I don’t, but I’m not sure how a kiss can be anything but a kiss, Lorelei.”
“Oh, with Cassia Brampton it can certainly be something other than a kiss. Trust me. But I don’t want to discuss that. I want to discuss what happened the last time we saw each other.”
He nods, and I’m struck by the expression on his face. It’s not the kind of expression a man wears when he knows he’s about to be given news he won’t like. No, Boston seems assured. Confident. He appears to truly believe it’s only a matter of time before we get back together. I’m going to have to be extremely firm with him today.
“Let’s go grab a coffee while we talk,” he suggests.
Sienna joins us, her purse in hand. “I’m gonna give you guys some space.” Eyeing me, she adds, “Just message me once you’re finished.”
As she exits the office, I give my full attention back to Boston. “We don’t need to grab a coffee to discuss this. There’s not much to say except that I don’t want to see you again.”
He looks at me with confusion. “You don’t mean that. We’ve got history that means something to both of us. I should never have left after that fight we had, but I think we both needed that time so we could realise we belong together.”
I don’t like hurting people, so it is hard for me to say what I need to say to him. But I have to do this for Ashton and me. “Boston, I don’t love you. I’m sorry if that hurts to hear, but it is the truth. I thought I said no to marrying you because I was afraid of losing you, and while that was true, I understand now that it wasn’t the full reason. I couldn’t marry you because you weren’t the right man for me. I know that now because I’ve met the right man. Being with him is completely different to being with you, and the reason for that is because I love him with every piece of myself. I’ve tried to hold some of myself back from him because that’s what I do with everyone, but the fact he’s managed to open me up in the way he has tells me everything I need to know. Ashton is my soul mate.”
Boston stares at me in silence for a long few, painful moments. I feel good that I’ve been honest, but at the same time, it’s painful for both of us. Finally, he says, “I knew you kept some parts of yourself closed off, but I also thought you loved me enough that you’d eventually share them with me. I guess I was wrong about that. You didn’t love me enough.”
The ache in his voice hits me in the gut. He’s not right, though. The problem wasn’t that I didn’t love him enough; the problem was we weren’t meant to be together. It doesn’t matter how much you try to love someone and make it work with them if they aren’t the one for you. Love is always hard, but with your soul mate, it’s the kind of hard that even when you’re exhausted by it, you still cling to each other in the dark of the night. Maybe not physically, but always emotionally. You don’t fight simply to prove a point; you fight to hold onto the love you share. And when you’re separated, your heart is unbearably heavy. The fact I never experienced these things with Boston is how I know I’m right.
There’s no point trying to explain all of that to him. He’s not in the right place to hear it now. My hope is that he finds his soul mate and comes to understand all this for himself.
“Goodbye, Boston,” I say, my voice choking up a little, because as right as this decision is, it’s still hard to close a chapter of my life.
His lips flatten as he watches me with disbelief. But he doesn’t fight me on this. Instead, he nods. “I hope he can give you what you want.”
Boston Haynes walks out of my life for the second time. This time, though, I know with every fibre of my being that it’s the right thing for us. For me. My future is with Ashton. I have never been surer of anything in my life.
“You’re awake early,” I say when Ashton calls me just after 9:00 p.m. “I wasn’t expecting you for another hour or so.” It’s four in the morning where he is.
“I didn’t sleep well. Jack wasn’t good last night, and it’s been playing on my mind. Tell me about your day.”
I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Jack, and I want to ask Ashton about him, but I get the feeling that’s not what he needs right now, so I leave that for another time. “Sienna and I went out for dinner. We planned a girls’ weekend next month. And then I came home and ate way too much chocolate.” I omit the part about Boston because I want to warm up to telling him that. We’ve only just gotten past the Cassia debacle, and while I know we still have things to discuss from our previous fight, I want to give us a little time and space to ease into that.
“Is there such a thing as too much chocolate?”
I smile. “This is why I love you. You understand chocolate the same way I do.”
“You only love me because of my chocolate addiction?”
My smile grows. I love it when Ashton is like this. “I didn’t know of this addiction of yours. I have to say I approve. What’s your favourite kind?”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
Leaning back against the pillows on my bed, I wiggle into a comfortable position. I’m hoping this is going to be a long conversation. “Well, there are a few other reasons why I love you, but chocolate has to move near the top of the list. I feel like you’ll understand and still love me when I’m older and my hips are carrying some of that chocolate.”
“Do you want to know what I love right now?”
“What?”
“The fact you’re already thinking about growing old with me.”
My tummy flutters. “I’m thinking about a
lot of things where you’re concerned.”
“Switch to FaceTime. I need to see you.” The fun, flirty tone disappears from his voice, replaced with that bossy tone of his I love.
I do as he says, and a second later, he appears on my screen. My tummy does a whole lot more than flutter at the sight. My man is hot. Between his bare chest and his sexy, messy bed hair, I wish he wasn’t a continent away.
His gaze moves over me. The heat in his eyes is undeniable even through the phone. “Fuck I miss you,” he growls, meeting my gaze again.
I’m fairly sure where this is going after those four words, but Ashton surprises me when he says, “I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did when I found out you’d gone to see Boston. And I sure as hell shouldn’t have told you I’d take care of him.”
I don’t for one second let go of his eyes. “I saw Boston today. I told him I’m in love with you and that I don’t want to see him again.” My voice grows more serious when I add, “And I made it clear, in no uncertain terms, that my future is with you.”
He takes all of that in, but he doesn’t comment on it. Instead, he says, “I don’t want to fight with you over Willow Street, but—”
I cut him off. “I was silly about that, Ashton. Of course Willow Street won’t remain the same forever. If it’s not you who develops it, it’ll just be someone else. So while I hate to see it change, I’m not going to argue with you anymore about it. And besides, I think my insecurities came into that far more than they should have.”
He frowns. “What insecurities?”
I feel stupid admitting all this to him, but I know that if we’ve got any hope of building a strong relationship, I have to share these parts of myself with him. The parts I’m not confident about. “I believe in allowing my emotions into my business decisions, but at the same time, I have a lot of self-doubt around that, because I don’t see many other successful business people do this. When we argued over your plans for Willow Street, you told me to take my emotions out of it, and that hit all my insecurities at once. I reacted to that more than anything.”
