Plays 6

by Tom Murphy

  Anna Grandma? I heard you shouting.

  Arina I have another visitor.

  The car has arrived. There is a silence. Arina isn’t going to be the one to break the silence. Eventually:

  Peter (off) Now! Muhammad had to come to the mountain! . . . Bearing gifts! . . . A few gifts for his dear friend Mama! . . . And we are dear to each other, aren’t we? . . .

  Arina We are in need of nothing today!

  Peter (off) But wait’ll you see!

  Anthony comes in with a sack, puts it down, nods a self-conscious greeting, and goes out again.

  Peter (off) Oh, I’m a bad, bad boy! . . . But you are a bad, bad girl! How we’ve let time pass! And didn’t we promise – how long ago was that? – to call on each other?! . . . And look what else I brought you! I’ve a maid for you!

  Arina We have just acquired a maid, thank you! All vacant posts are now filled! (She winks her control of the situation at Anna.) Peter (off) But wait’ll you see!

  Anna retreats to the bedroom, off. And Vera comes in. She, too, is now fully grown. She is wearing some kind of loose overcoat. She bows shyly, and whispers:

  Vera Ma’am.

  Arina . . . Turn around. (And when Vera obeys:) What a back!

  Vera Always on about my back, what has it done on you?

  Arina (takes her hands) You’ve grown. You look well. (And now a discovery.) And what is this? Is this something else? What wind brought you this? (Vera is pregnant.)

  Vera It’s nothing to do with me.

  Arina It’s what?

  Vera It’s as Peter pleases.

  Arina Who?

  Vera The master.

  Arina Well, well!

  Peter (off) And it isn’t as though a continent divided us!

  Arina This is our Christian monk! (But something in the situation pleases her.)

  Anthony comes in, immediately preceding Peter. Peter, obviously, has aged too. He’s nervous. Arina is offering no greetings, so no greetings are exchanged. Anthony has a chicken, which he holds up.

  Peter I thought to bring you a turkey.

  Arina Did you?

  Peter But it would be no use to you because of its dimensions and your circumscribed cooking facilities . . . And your modest requirements, now that you live alone.

  Arina Yes.

  Peter (producing items from the sack) Cheese. Cucumbers. Apples. You never tasted sweeter.

  Arina I planted the trees.

  Peter Eternal gratitude to you.

  She has her back to him: a movement towards her – or he only considers it – to put his hands on her waist, as was his habit.

  So this is how it is, this is how it is . . . (He has baulked at the idea of touching her.) And longing to kiss my dear mama . . . Not a lot of growth up here, let alone apple trees. But maybe that will change. Well, please God. (Producing other items from the sack.) Pickles. Sausage. Vegetables. What’s this? Oh yes. Not that we ever indulged in those days, but once in a blue moon there were certain bought articles from the town, one in particular that you liked, wasn’t there?

  Arina Rum.

  Peter No.

  Arina Marzipan.

  Peter Marzipan.

  Arina . . . And you are well?

  Peter I’m sad. But allow me to ask, how are the grasshoppers, our young proprietresses? Do you hear from them?

  Arina You didn’t notice the hackney car drive across the plain yesterday and come up here? – You didn’t notice it?

  Peter Was that what that motor car was about? So they’re here?

  Arina Anna is here. ‘Grandma, may I stay for a while?’ You see: asking my permission! She and her sister own the place.

  Peter (to Anthony) Take that idle creature into the kitchen and do something with it!

  Anthony goes off with the chicken, the ‘idle creature’.

  Arina You see: ‘May I stay for a while’!

  Peter But strange of her to arrive out of the blue like that.

  Arina Oh, they’ve always kept in touch. Anna writes.

  Peter Looking for money.

  Arina No! I account to them – as I should – for running the place, and now and again I’d find something to send them. Then the letters: ‘Don’t send us any more money’ – They’re on the stage. ‘Don’t send us any more of anything’, they didn’t need anything, they were having a great time. ‘We’re given presents, we’re wonderfully happy’, parties, restaurants, champagne, ‘And we don’t have to pay for anything.’

  Peter Tsssssss! (To Vera.) Go out! You might find something in there too to occupy you.

  Vera goes off to the kitchen.

  Peter They can’t be keeping themselves straight.

  Arina What does that mean?

  Peter Anna was always giddy.

  Arina No! –

  Peter You wouldn’t know what –

  Arina No! –

  Peter You wouldn’t know what goes on in the other one’s head.

  Arina Anna, yes, is soft, but I’d still have hopes of her.

  Peter She’ll hook up with a ne’er-do-well stranger – A soldier? And what will that mean then for this place?

  Arina (which gives her pause; then, angrily) What will it mean?

  Peter And what will that mean then for you? It bears thinking about, that’s all I’m saying. There’s no sin for girls that go on the stage. They lose their treasure and – (he blows a short, tuneless whistle) – that’s all they care about it.

  Vera comes in to select something from the sack or box. She has removed her loose coat and the evidence of her pregnancy is clearly evident; imminent. She goes out again.

  Arina (as though to no one) Oh, nowadays it appears they don’t even have to go on the stage.

  Peter Even saints sinned, Mama.

  Arina Did they?

  Peter When driven to it.

  Arina Hard pressed, they say, a magpie will sing like a nightingale. What brought you up here?

  Peter What brought me up?!

  Arina Yes!

  Peter What brought me up here?!

  Arina If it’s to do with Vera, you’re not leaving her here.

  Peter That never crossed my! – I never thought of! – Tsssssss, I! Vera is my – I made Vera my housekeeper.

  Arina And you made her something else!

  Peter I, tsssssss! Well, you always handled such matters.

  Arina ‘Such matters’?

  Peter I know nothing about it! It’s got nothing to do with me! Arina And it’s got nothing to do with her!

  Peter (starts to cry) I value my name . . . No mud will stick to me.

  Arina (viewing his tearfulness suspiciously; she is, though, working out something. To herself) ‘Such matters’ . . . Would such a matter be such a bad thing? Would an heir be such a bad thing? . . . But what could I do about such matters up here? Up here, what can a person do for anyone, that’s all I’m saying. What?

  Peter The other matter then that we were talking about.

  Arina What other matter then?

  Peter I don’t know.

  Arina You don’t know.

  Peter The other matter!

  Arina (to herself) Christ! (Can he talk straight?!)

  Peter This place then – the other matter we were talking about – this place! You should have control of it. You should have them have a deed of trust drawn up for it in your favour.

  Arina I’ve one already for running it.

  Peter I know you have for ‘running’ it, but one for protecting it, for yourself. Or mortgaging it if you wished to? Or stitching it back on to the rest like you had it one time? The latest, it’s rumoured: talks of afforestation for places like this from the government. Well, please God. Trees look nice on the mountainside. And there’ll be grants going for those able to fill in the forms. It bears thinking about, that’s all I’m saying.

  Anna comes in. She has dressed. There is something very vulnerable about her. And there’s something touching about her costume: perhaps the innocen
ce of high-heel shoes. Peter is taken with her – a degree of leery senescence. Anthony and Vera return from the kitchen during the following.

  Anna Hello, Uncle Peter!

  Peter Who is this?

  Anna I’m afraid it’s only me, Uncle Peter.

  Peter Who-is-this-big-woman!

  Anna Anna, Uncle Peter.

  Peter Anna-Uncle-Peter!

  He kisses her, forehead, cheeks, presses her to him, rubs her back . . .

  None of you knows what I’m going to say to you now, do you? People nowadays like to go round a subject because they don’t know what they’re going to say next, but that’s not my way. I’m not like that. I don’t like it. It’s trying to be too clever, that’s what I think it is. And the thing I’m going to say to you now – and the thing that brought me up here is: ‘What can a person do for anyone up here?’ – I agree with you – so would you consider coming down for a visit, stay for a while? settle those couple of outstanding matters we were talking about while you were about it, stay for as long as you like? forever if you like, including this big grown-up lady here (Anna). Would you consider that, Mama?

  Arina I would.

  Scene Two

  We are back in the location of Act One, once Arina’s now Peter’s place. It is night.

  N.B. The following is an optional scene.

  Ulita spreads a baize cloth on a table, sets chairs and a pack of cards.

  Anna and Vera come in. Anna’s sashaying and singing to herself are not what they seem; they are a cover for something she can’t face up to or reveal to others. Also, she would like to convince herself that safety lies here in this place. Vera, never a knowing person, who is quite simple really, has grown brighter: satisfaction in her pregnancy and impending motherhood. She now has her own part of life.

  Anna (singing) Ah! Ah! ‘Que j’aime, que j’aime! Que j’aime les mili-mili-mili-taires!’ Uncle is a good man, isn’t he? Isn’t he very Anna understanding? Isn’t he a very caring person, Ulita, Vera?

  Ulita leaves. Vera’s smiling moon face. As in adolescence, Anna steals a drink for herself and Vera.

  Anna Life – everything – is so simple to him! It’s – enviable. He’s funny. (A toast.) À votre bonne santé! Everything with chic, you see!

  Vera Here goes! (The toast from adolescence.)

  Anna He’s very caring of Grandma. And, after everything, she’s very happy with him. She’s funny. She wants the farm back to give to him, I think – I don’t care! He wants me to stay, live here.

  Vera He fairly licks his mouth when he looks at you.

  Anna (twirls, laughs) But what do you do here, aren’t you bored?

  Vera I’m not a lady.

  Anna Does he ever stop talking?

  Vera No. He’s getting worse! That’s the reason, Ivan says, it’s so hard to get anyone to work here. But I have a trick. I don’t listen.

  Anna Doesn’t he notice?

  Vera How can he tell? I keep looking at him while he’s talking, but I amn’t here.

  Anna Where are you?

  Vera I think a lot about potatoes. Your sister? (Meaning ‘How is she?’ )

  Momentarily, a startled look, fear, on Anna’s face.

  Vera (repeating her question) Lena?

  Anna Tell you some other time – (singing:) Que j’aime, que j’aime! Que j’aime, les mili-mili-mili-taires!

  Arina (off and as she comes in) ‘Que j’aime, que j’aime, que j’aime, que j’aime! Les mili-mili-mili-mili-mili-mili –’ Whatever that means!

  Arina, Priest, Peter and Ivan come in. Ulita is in attendance. Something of a festive spirit – though not from Ivan. Arina seems to have taken Vera under her wing.

  Peter (to Anna) Miss Madam! Running away from the dinner table without my permission!

  Anna (giggling) Sorry, Uncle!

  Peter ‘Sorry Uncle!’

  Arina (of and aside to Vera) And this Miss Madam! You’d think it might be a prince she’s expecting! (Seating Vera.) Come, my beauty!

  Priest So unexpected: Again, so kind of you to have me here?!

  Peter has a whispered word with Ulita, who leaves; while Arina continues to Vera, kindly:

  Arina And maybe it will be a prince! But the place is quiet, Ivan, even during the day? (Why is that?)

  Ivan (non-committal) Oh! (He’s unhappy and he’s removing himself.) Goodnight!

  Peter Aren’t you going to play cards with us?

  Ivan No.

  Peter No? No? Come over here and sit in this chair beside Vera. (He would like to set up Ivan with Vera.)

  Ivan No, thank you! There are things to be seen to, and I think a storm is coming on.

  Peter And we’ve just got up from a nice stuffed big roast turkey dinner!

  Laughter. He is great fun.

  With glazed accompaniments!

  Laughter.

  Arina Well, let a storm come on, Ivan!

  Peter Let it! Mama will deal with it for us! We’re in here nice and snug, Little Miss Madam, aren’t we?

  Anna (giggling) Yes, Uncle!

  Peter ‘Yes Uncle!’

  Ivan Goodnight! (He leaves.)

  The others call ‘Goodnight’. Peter, though, has now become pensive.

  Peter (as if to himself) Ivan. (And shakes his head.)

  Arina Ivan is a good worker.

  Peter Oh, we cannot fault a good worker as a worker, but what if that worker’s intelligence quotient is lacking?

  Arina Ivan’s? Ivan is loyal, Ivan is.

  Peter I once read a book – Excuse me, Mama, while I tell you about the book I once read. It said that the intellect is not to be despised if it be directed by faith. For a man without intelligence soon becomes a plaything of his passions. Wasn’t that book in this house, Mama?

  Arina I expect it was if you think it was!

  Peter Would you agree, Father?

  Priest I? (He doesn’t know what answer is expected of him.)

  Peter Oh, yes!

  Arina Theologians! Are we going to play cards?

  Peter Little Miss Madam, you come over here and sit next to me.

  Anna I’ll watch, uncle.

  Arina (to Peter) Not in that one (chair), I don’t want you on that side of me.

  Priest Madam? (Asking her where he should sit.)

  Arina There!

  Priest Madam (Thank you.)

  Peter Mama is the boss, Mama is the dealer.

  Arina (announcing the name of the game and dealing the cards) ‘Fools’!

  Priest Again so kind, Sir, the invitation, unexpected.

  The cards are being dealt. The rhythm of the speeches often come from how the cards are dealt out, gathered, sorted, played. Anna, whether hovering in the background, approaching or withdrawing from the table is a study in herself. The serenity of Vera’s trust, too, is marked.

  Anna May I, uncle, have a glass of this?

  Peter Order what you like, Miss! We haven’t seen this lady in years, suddenly she arrives out of the blue, the farm, (on) the mountainside: ‘Oh, Grandma, may I stay for a little?’ Next she’s down here, can’t put up with us past a week: ‘Oh, uncle, I must go, it’s so dull here.’

  Anna Well, let’s see how it goes!

  Peter But I’m going to make her my prisoner.

  Arina And we haven’t talked about your sister.

  Peter The sullen Lena.

  Arina How is she?

  Anna Yes, well, she’s! (A private moment of fear and confusion for her.)

  Arina She was prone to colds and flus, as I remember it.

  Anna (Singing to herself) ‘Que j’aime, que j’aime, que j’aime les mili-mili-mili-taires! ’

  Arina (to herself) ‘Mili-mili-mili-militaires’.

  Peter (as to himself) Mama always handled things. Settled everything for the best.

  Arina I’ll take care of things, my good son . . . The things that happened here. Love intrigues? No end of them. They’d try to carry them off, hide the results of their jiggery-pokery, but th
ere was no taking me in. Every time I tracked them down and dealt with them. Better than in a book.

  Peter (cueing her) ‘Those weren’t meant to know?’

  Arina Those who weren’t meant to know were kept in the dark.

  Peter Never a hint of scandal.

  Arina And it wasn’t always to do with the servants. My sister-in-law came running.

  Peter ‘Arina, Arina’ – listen to this, Father.

  Arina ‘Arina, Arina, help me, save me.’ I did. With the Church at my elbow. And I never liked her. Got herself into trouble while her husband was away. I was present at the birth. A healthy baby boy. Her husband in the next room. Never knew a thing about it for as long as he lived. Now! Men! ‘Fools’!

  She laughs. She’s won the first game.

  Peter She’s too clever for us, Father!

  Priest Madam! (Which is his applause.)

  Vera She’s too clever for us!

  Arina (to Vera) Deal. (Meaning ‘Deal the cards.’ To herself .) I didn’t always do the right thing. A healthy baby boy.

  Peter Always settled everything for the best, Father, the Church at her elbow, assisting and making all the necessary arrangements.

  Vera (paused in dealing the cards, listening to the storm; and whispers in her superstitious manner) Ivan was right about the storm.

  They listen to the storm for a moment or two.

  Peter Ivan, tsssssss! No, we can’t fault a worker for his good work, no more than we can fault a beast of burden for carrying a good load. But we can fault that worker for other things, can’t we, Father?

  Priest I?

  Peter If the intelligence quotient is lacking?

  Priest I don’t quite follow where you’re going, Sir.

  Peter I like to speak my mind. No shilly-shallying. Beasts nor reptiles nor fish have intelligence. Nor birds. Hens? They have temptations but no one expects them to resist them. Hens don’t take vows, do they? Everything is natural to them. But we? Supposing you, Father, were to feel a bodily temptation, now, this minute, what would you call on for help?

  Priest My faith.

  Peter No, your intelligence. We were given intelligence, not for probing the unknown, but to refrain from sin including bodily passions. So a servant may be loyal – like Ivan – but if intelligence isn’t that servant’s strong point? Now you follow?

  Priest Yes!

  Peter Mama?

  Arina (ordering her hand of cards) Yes! Hens! They have to answer to no one, neither God nor the authorities. They have only one superior. And who is that? Who is that? The cock! (And she laughs.) The cock, the cock! ‘Fools’! He’s like the Turkish sultan to them!