The Ravana Clan Vampires: a Young Adult Paranormal Romance (Complete Series)
Page 72
Heat clogged my throat and moved to the back of my eyes as I tried not to let my emotions show. My chin wobbled, the traitor that it was, and I blinked hard, trying to regain my composure. Stephan had hit the nail on the head. It’s what I’d always wanted. To love. To be loved. To know that somewhere out there there was someone who was thinking about me as much as I was thinking about them. To know that there was someone out there who would care if something happened to me. There were so many nights when in foster care, or in that small, crappy apartment on my own, that I’d wondered if I died—maybe mugged and beaten, maybe of starvation—would anyone even notice? And my funeral. Would anyone come? The truth would always hit me so hard it would bring me to my knees. I was no one to everyone. I walked through people’s lives, not into them. I observed people’s lives, not joined them.
Not anymore. I had them. And it was really all I ever wanted. More than I ever wanted. Who would’ve thought there would be not one person for me, but four? Instead of finding that special someone, I found four special someones to make up for the no ones I’d had.
Nicolai walked forward and Connor and Stephan backed off. “I know somewhere in your crazy big heart that you’re upset, Ri. Don’t be. I’m sure there’ll be plenty of other opportunities to fight for us. We’re just not that smart.”
He cracked a smile and I tried to follow suit, but my lips trembled instead. If Nicolai was trying to make me laugh, then he truly realized what a blow this was to me. Out of all of them, him and I had connected about this very thing. Both of us would do anything for our group. We were willing to make the ultimate sacrifice.
“They don’t need you, Ri. We need you.”
I nodded, his face becoming distorted by the hot tears now filling my eyes. Christian moved forward with vampire-like speed. He picked me up and held me to him. I gasped at the sudden contact, at the sudden raw outburst from him, and all it did was make him hold me closer. “I’m not even going to pretend. I couldn’t be more happy right now. I love you. To me, they did us the biggest favor in not choosing you. They solidified our future together. Soon, this will all be over and we can move forward. Together. Like it’s supposed to be.” His hands combed through my hair. “I know we’re not all out of danger yet and I should care for the fate of the rest of everyone out there, but inside, I’m really just rejoicing in what this means.” He took a deep breath, his chest knocking into mine like it was a surprise to him too. When he started to talk again, he fought for control. “You and I, and Nicolai and Stephan and Connor, will all be able to walk out of here after this. It may not be the way we all dreamed, staying in this house to start our lives, but the most important parts will be there. The five of us.”
A hand moved to rub my back. “You know he’s right, Ri.”
I wasn’t disputing that. At all. It was exactly how I felt. I nodded into Christian’s chest, and then breathed in deep, taking with it all the anxiety and agony of having your future up in the air and expelling it. I wanted a choice and I got one. We had a path we could follow. There were things to do now. Our remaining fighters would have to be coached by Soren in hopes there would only be two more matches. The least amount of fights the better because no matter what the princes said now about being happy we were going to stay in tact, if Gregor fell victim to this war, they’d be devastated.
Stepping back, I faced them all. “Okay.” One-by-one their expressions lifted. I cracked a smile, a very small smile. “Okay,” I repeated. Connor was the first to look fully relieved, and then narrowed his eyes when I spoke again. “We have a lot of things to do now.”
“Gregor still needs to be trained, in case,” Nicolai stated, his face all business now, the seeming threat of my impending meltdown gone.
“And Soren will need to be made aware about who was chosen and what their strengths are so we can compare them to his knowledge of their warriors. Who fights next?”
“Either Lex or Samuel,” Christian said. “Soren thinks they might send in their best guy to get a win so probably Lex. She’s taking their number one, but as you already know, we won’t know who it is they’ll actually send in to fight until a few minutes after the sun goes down.”
I started pacing as I took the information in, my thumb coming up to trace back and forth across my lower lip. Right. That made sense. Lex would fight their big guy and then Samuel— Samuel…? I stopped in my tracks. “Samuel’s going in?”
Stephan looked at the rest of them with me, curiosity in his eyes until Christian nodded once. “He was chosen.”
“Samuel Rajyvik? The Samuel?”
Nicolai cocked his head. “That surprises you?”
“It’s just…he’s a teacher, he’s not a guard. Sure, he runs the training facility, but does that really give him the knowledge to do this?”
“Princess…Honey…,” Connor started, a smile lighting his face. “Samuel doesn’t just coordinate the guard training facility. He’s one of the only vampires in our world who’s trained as a guard, and still has the superior abilities the rest of the vampire population does. How else could he run our training facility?”
“I guess I never thought about his abilities in real world fighting. No offense, but fighting for themselves isn’t something vampires do very well.”
“I take offense to that,” Nic said.
I rolled my eyes, and shrugged. It was the truth. I knew Nic wanted to train more, and he and Christian were about as trained as any vampire in their world could be, but to send one of the vampires into this very important, very dangerous match. It didn’t make senses. I stared back at Nic. “Just…can he win?”
“He wouldn’t be going out there if he couldn’t,” Christian said, his tone matter-of-fact. “He can win. He’ll be a better match physically than any of the guards, and he’s properly trained.”
“Okay,” I said, holding my hands up. “It’s just that he always stands there while we’re running.”
Connor spoke up, his tone light. “He just doesn’t want to make you look bad.” He took off into a blur, ran around me once—probably—and then returned to his spot, his arms crossed over his chest and his chin jutting into the air with a cocky smile tilted over his face.
Point taken.
“Fine. Soren already talking to them now then?”
“They went to the training rooms in the guard wing as soon as the meeting ended. They’ll train for a little while, talk with Soren, then get some sleep before they wake up and do it again tomorrow before the next fight.”
“Gregor is…?”
Nic pulled out his cell phone. “If he’s not down there already, I can get him down there and we can go through some things.”
I nodded, watching as we all spurred into action. Sure, they didn’t want me to fight, but that didn’t mean I was just going to sit around and let everyone else do the work. There were other things to be done. For one, I could be a sparring partner for our fighters. Soren could tell me how to move, how to act, pretending to be one of Dumont’s men for training purposes. Actually, that was exactly what I would do. “Alright, let’s go.” I turned to Stephan. “Would you mind coming down too? In case anyone gets injured in training. They’ll need to be mended right away.”
His emerald eyes sparkled. “Of course. I’ll just stop by the infirmary first and grab some things.”
The five of us moved through the estate again like one unit until Stephan broke off to head to the infirmary momentarily as we continued toward the guard training rooms. Inside, there were already sounds of training, metal clanking against metal and thuds against the mat. When I walked in, there were three separate training areas sectioned off for each of the fighters. Samuel worked weaponry, Lex worked takedowns and…and Zeke was working stakes with a propped up T.J..
I froze in place. I hadn’t even asked about the third fighter. They told me about Lex and Samuel, but I hadn’t even thought to ask about the third match. “Him?”
Him? Of all people. Zeke over me? Were they all out of
their damn minds?
Just as I thought that, Zeke rolled, sending a wooden stake flying into the body dummy across the room. I didn’t see where it landed, but I was guessing exactly where it should have because he stood up with that same cocky expression I was used to seeing on him.
Son of a bitch.
9
All around me, the training sounds still buzzed. I took a step forward, and a hand closed over my shoulder. “What are you doing?”
By this time, people noticed we’d walked in. I tried to school my face, but I couldn’t stop the anger from rising. Zeke? Zeke who trained for the recognition of it all. Zeke who trained only because he wanted the coveted spot, not because he actually wanted to save the Ravanas’ lives. Zeke who’d brought me nothing but misery since I came here.
I didn’t trust him. Would never trust him.
A body moved into view. I worked my way up his dark clothing, and settled on his shadowed face. “Don’t do this here.”
“Him?” I asked, my body already trembling as just the thought made me want to dispel it as a lie. They couldn’t do this. They couldn’t choose Zeke over me because that would mean… Well, it would mean a bunch of different things. That he had out-trained me at Rajyvik. That he’d outworked me, too. That they thought he was better. It didn’t matter that I’d received the Medal of Valor or was chosen to go out on missions when he hadn’t because when it really mattered most, they thought he was better than me.
My stomach lurched, but I steeled my fingers into fists.
I was second. I wouldn’t get the Ravanas placement. I—
Hands tugged on me from behind and within an instant, we were back out in the hallway again just outside the training room door. A hand waved in front of my face. “Snap out of it, Princess. You look like Nicolai.”
“Shut up,” a husky voice hissed.
“Well, it’s true,” Connor said over his shoulder.
“It’s Zeke she’s pissed about, genius. We should’ve told her in her room.”
That couldn’t be more obvious. I clenched my jaw together to keep those words in. “Why him?”
Christian moved into my line of sight, taking a peek at Nicolai before peering into my eyes again. “They didn’t really specify why, just made general comments. Bravery, skill…”
I shook my head. “He won’t do it. He won’t win.”
“Ri, they chose him,” Nicolai said from behind his brother.
“I don’t care if they did. They’re wrong. This is just a job to him.”
“But it doesn’t really matter, does it?” Christian asked, his voice hardening. “The decision’s already been made, and there’s nothing any of us can do.” He turned and started for the training room entrance again. Over his shoulder, he said, “All we can do is just help them before it’s their turn. Besides, he’ll probably fight last and if we win the next two, we won’t even need him.”
He didn’t spare me another glance before moving inside again and walking up to Soren to engage him in conversation. I stared two holes straight into his back. Nic walked by and bumped my shoulder. “He’s just so relieved you’re not going in that arena. Don’t take it personally.”
Right. Don’t take it personally. This was what I was brought here to do! To learn, to train, to beat out Zeke for the spot he thought was his so I could be with my princes. That was my goal from day one.
Connor slipped his hand around my middle and walked me forward. “Come on. Let’s play nice. You don’t have to work with him. You can just help Lex and Samuel right now,” he said, pointing in their direction.
I glared at them. Cold betrayal washed over me. Lex was my friend, my mentor, and Samuel, he was who I’d sought to impress from the beginning. He was the one who’d make the decision on my fate, and here he’d already made it. I was second. Still. Always.
I pushed Connor’s hand away and spun on my heel. “I need a second.” Or a minute. Or forever. What in the hell?
I walked from the room and then ran down the hallway. Outside, the spectators in this crazy war game were quiet and I wondered if the earlier fight had made this all real for them. There was no celebrating or shouts. It was as quiet as the night should be.
Footsteps sounded behind me. I slipped down a narrow stone hall that led to a circle-shaped room. There was an exterior door directly on the other side. My hand closed around the latch, but a voice rose up. “Where are you going?”
I whirled. It was those same piercing eyes that greeted me to this world. The one who took me from my front door. Why had he even bothered if he didn’t believe in me? I wanted to voice all this, but the only thing that would make it from my brain to my throat was “Why?”
Samuel straightened his shoulders. “You’re a guard-in-training, Ariana. I don’t have to answer to you.”
My mouth fell open and I laughed. It was a short, harsh sound I didn’t recognize. “A guard-in-training. Of course. That’s what I was when I was kidnapped, what I was when I snuck into the compound to save the guards, including your family, from Dumont’s men. That’s what I was when I went out on a scouting mission and—”
He crossed his hands over his chest. “Are you questioning my decision?”
“Yes!” My hands came up in frustration, but I forced them back down again. “You know no one will fight for them better than me. Especially not Zeke. Not him.”
“Your personal feelings are clouding your judgment. Zeke was, and continues to be, the best guard-in-training we have at Rajyvik.”
I shook my head, dismissing it for what it was. A lie. “You don’t mean that. When it comes down to them…,” I said, pointing at the space behind Samuel. No doubt they were all there somewhere listening in. “You know I would fight for them harder than anyone else here.”
“Better than T.J.? Better than Lex?”
“You know what I mean,” I said, my voice rising. “I have a reason behind the fight. He doesn’t. He never will. Sure, he’s good, but he doesn’t have the passion I have, especially in this situation. No one would fight harder and you know that. You know that.”
Samuel’s hands lowered and he grabbed his wrist in front of him, a true military stance. “His weapons skills are more advanced than yours. Don’t forget how short your time with us has been. Zeke has been training longer than you have.”
“Training doesn’t have anything to do with it. What about heart? What about having a purpose? You’ve heard those stories before about soccer moms lifting cars off their kids, right? All you need is will, a good enough reason, and you can do anything. I would never let anything hurt them or their family. If I needed it, I would rise to the occasion. It might be dirty, and raw, but I would do it. To send him in is…” I shook my head. …a mistake.
Samuel was finished with my outburst though. “To send him in is the decision that Lex and I made. Gregor has already approved them, and there’s nothing more to be said about it. Talking any more about it is hindering what everyone else is trying to do in there. You want to be worthy, you want to ‘rise to the occasion’ as you put it? Get in there and be whatever we need you to be, even if it means sucking up your pride and having to take one on the chin. You said you want to help? That is how you can do it.” He walked forward, his toes millimeters away from mine. “Or maybe I really was wrong about you after all.”
He glared at me before spinning and exiting the little stone alcove. My shoulders deflated as his steps retreated back down to the training room, back down to where the fights would be won. Competitions weren’t won in the matches themselves, they were won in practices and in training, through the blood and the sweat and the injuries. I’d heard him say that many times before. Him throwing it in my face now was just another blow.
Tears fell over this time. Shame. Confusion. And still, there was that betrayal rotting in my stomach underneath it all and souring everything. I let myself wallow in it for a few more seconds and then brushed the wetness away from my face as quick as they fell. I breathed out, my
cheeks filling and then deflating as I tried to calm myself. I closed my eyes. What had Samuel said that wasn’t true? Zeke was good. I couldn’t deny that. The decision had been made. There was nothing I could change. The only thing left was what I’d intended to do in the first place before I found out who they’d chosen over me. There was more work to do. I couldn’t just sit by. It wasn’t in my nature. Never had been even when I was Ariana Nobody from Calcutta and getting self defense advice from the homeless guy down the street.
I walked forward and fell back in step with my flanking princes just as seamlessly as when we walked down here the first time. “Is my face red?” I whispered.
Stephan answered. “A little. You could’ve just been overexerting yourself though.”
“Yeah,” Connor deadpanned. “Maybe we should get sweaty before we go back in there.”
Nicolai’s shoulders shook through his barely contained fit of laughter. “Can we just get through tonight?” he asked in exasperation. “You guys are killing me with the emotions all over the place.”
I heard all this like an outsider. I knew they were doing it for my benefit, but I couldn’t bring myself to be grateful, not when this was one of the biggest fails of my life.
“For the record—” Christian started.
“It doesn’t matter,” I finally said. “Let’s just go in there and do this.”
Without looking back, I moved toward Soren who was working with Lex on takedowns. “Diesel’s a beast,” I heard him say. “He’s big, but he’s also fast. He has the perfect mix of agility and strength that tears through his opponents.”
“Is that supposed to be a pep talk?” Lex quipped.
“It’s reality,” Soren said. His eyes moved around the room until they fell on me. His face pinched together as he regarded me, then he waved me forward. “Ariana can be your uke.”