Steel Resolve

by B. J Daniels

  * * *

  CHANCE HAD BEEN parked down the street, waiting for Mary to return home. He needed to talk to her about earlier. Since getting the box his mother had left for him, he’d been so focused on finding his father that he wanted to apologize. She’d offered to help. He wanted to get it over with as soon as possible since he’d managed to narrow it down to three names.

  It wasn’t until he saw the pickup stop in front of her building that he realized she had been on a date with that deputy.

  He growled under his breath. There was something about that guy that he didn’t like. And it wasn’t just that he was going out with Mary, he told himself.

  Now he mentally kicked himself for sitting down the street watching her place. If she saw him, she’d think he was spying on her. He reached to key the ignition and leave when he saw the passenger door of the deputy’s rig open. From where he sat, he couldn’t miss the deputy grabbing Mary as she tried to get out. What the hell?

  He was already opening his door and heading toward her building when he saw Dillon get out and go after her. He could tell by her body language that she wasn’t happy. What had the deputy done to upset her?

  Chase saw that Dillon had pinned her against the side of her building. Mary appeared to be trying to get her keys out and go inside.

  “Let her go!” he yelled as he advanced on the man.

  Both Mary and Dillon turned at the sound of his voice. Both looked surprised, then angry.

  “This is none of your business,” the two almost said in unison.

  “Let go of her,” he said again to the deputy.

  Mary pushed free of Dillon’s arms and, keys palmed, turned to face Chase as he approached. “What are you doing here?”

  “I needed to talk to you, but I’m glad I was here to run interference for you. If he’s giving you trouble—”

  “I can handle this,” she said.

  Chase could see how upset she was at Dillon and now him. “Date’s over. You should go,” he said to the deputy.

  Dillon started to come at him. Chase was ready, knowing he could take him in a fair fight. He just doubted the man had ever fought fair. Dillon threw the first punch and charged. Chase took only a glancing blow before he slugged the deputy square in the face, driving him back, but only for a moment.

  The man charged again, leading with a right and then a quick left that caught Chase on the cheek. He hit Dillon hard in the stomach, doubling him over before shoving him back. The deputy sprawled on the ground, but was scrambling to his feet reaching for something in his boot when Chase heard Mary screaming for them to stop.

  “Stop it!” Mary cried. “Both of you need to leave. Now.”

  Dillon slowly slide the knife back into its scabbard, but not before Chase had seen it. He realized how quickly the fight could have gotten ugly if Mary hadn’t stopped it when she did.

  The deputy got up from the ground, cussing and spitting out blood. His lip was cut and bleeding. Chase’s jaw and cheek were tender. He suspected he’d have a black eye by morning.

  The look Dillon gave him made it clear that this wasn’t over. The next time they saw each other, if Mary wasn’t around, they would settle things. At least now Chase knew what he would be facing. A man who carried a blade in his boot.

  “Leave now,” Mary repeated.

  “We’ll finish our discussion some other time,” Dillon said to her pointedly, making Chase wish he knew what had been said before Mary had gotten upset and tried to go inside. Now, she said nothing as Dillon started toward his pickup.

  “That man is dangerous, Mary. If he—”

  She spun on him. “Are you spying on me, Chase?”

  “No, I needed to talk to you. I was just waiting...” He knew he sounded lame. It had been weak to wait down the street for her.

  She didn’t cut him any slack. “I’m sure whatever you need to talk to me about can wait until tomorrow.” She turned to open her door.

  “I’m sorry,” he said behind her, glad he’d been here, even though he’d made her angry. He hated to think what could have happened if he hadn’t intervened.

  Mary didn’t answer as she went inside and closed the door.

  As he walked back to his pickup, he knew he had only himself to blame for all of this. He’d made so many mistakes, and he could add tonight’s to the list.

  Still, he worried. Mary thought she could handle Dillon. But the deputy didn’t seem like a man who would take no for an answer.

  * * *

  TORN BETWEEN ANGER and fear, Mary closed and locked the door behind her with trembling fingers. What was wrong with her? Tears burned her eyes. She hadn’t wanted to go out with Dillon tonight. So why had she let him persuade her into it?

  And Chase. Parked down the street watching her, spying on her? She shook her head. If he thought he could come back after all this time and just walk in and start—

  “Is everything okay?” asked a voice behind her, making her jump. “I didn’t mean to startle you,” Lucy said, coming up beside her in the hallway of her building.

  Mary was actually glad to see Lucy. She’d had it with men tonight. She wiped her eyes, angry at herself on so many levels, but especially for shedding more tears over Chase. Her life had felt empty without him, before Dillon, but now she missed that simple world.

  Even as she told herself that, she knew she was lying. Chase was back. She loved him. She wanted him. So why did she keep pushing him away?

  “What was that about?” Lucy asked, wide-eyed as they both watched the two men leave, Dillon in a hail of gravel as he spun out, and Chase limping a little as he headed for his truck.

  “Nothing,” she said, and took a deep breath before letting it out. She was glad to have Lucy in the building tonight.

  Lucy laughed. “Nothing? They were fighting over you. Two men were just fighting over you.” She was looking at her with awe.

  Mary had to smile. “It had more to do with male ego than me, trust me.” She thought about saying something to Lucy about Dillon’s warning to Mary that he’d ask her out, but realized it was probably a hollow threat. Anyway, she was betting that Lucy could take care of herself.

  * * *

  LUCY TRIED TO keep the glee out of her voice. She’d witnessed the whole thing. Poor Chase. What struck her as ironic was that she’d had nothing to do with any of it. This was all Mary’s own doing.

  “Would you like to come up to my apartment for a drink? Sometimes I’ve found talking also helps.” She shrugged.

  Mary hesitated only a moment before she gave Lucy an embarrassed smile. “Do you have beer?”

  Lucy laughed. “Beer, vodka, ice cream. I’m prepared for every heartbreak.”

  They climbed the stairs, Lucy opened the door and they entered her apartment. “I haven’t done much with the space,” Lucy said as she retrieved two beers from the refrigerator and handed one to Mary. “But I’m excited to pick up a few things to make it more mine. It really doesn’t need anything. You’ve done such a good job of appointing it.”

  “Thank you,” Mary said, taking the chair in the living room. “I’m just glad you’re enjoying staying here. I’m happy to have you.” Mary took a sip of her beer, looking a little uneasy now that she was here.

  Lucy curled her legs under her on the couch, getting comfortable, and broke the ice, first talking about decorating and finally getting to the good part. “I had to laugh earlier. I once had two men fight over me. It was in high school at a dance. At the time I’d been mortified with embarrassment.” She chuckled. “But my friends all thought it was cool.”

  “That was high school. It’s different at this age,” Mary said, and took another drink of her beer.

  Lucy cocked her head at her as she licked beer foam from her lips and got up to get them another. “But I’m betting there was one of those men who you wanted to win the fight
for you.”

  Mary looked surprised, then embarrassed.

  “I wager it wasn’t the deputy.”

  “You’re right,” her landlady admitted as she took the second beer. “Chase was my first love since the age of fifteen when he came to Montana to work on the ranch. We became best friends before...” Mary mugged a face. “Before we fell in love.”

  “So what happened to your happy ending?” Lucy asked as she took her beer back to the couch. She leaned toward Mary expectantly.

  “I caught him kissing another woman. He swore the woman kissed him, but I guess I realized then that maybe what my parents had been saying was true. We were too young to be that in love. Only twenty-four. I let Chase go. He left Montana to...find himself,” Mary said, and took another sip.

  “Find himself? I’m guessing you didn’t know he was lost.”

  Mary shook her head with a laugh. “We were too young to make any big decisions until we’d lived more. My father said that I had to let Chase sow some wild oats. But I didn’t want him to leave.”

  Lucy groaned. “If he wanted to date other women, you didn’t really want him to do it here, did you?”

  “I wanted him to tell me that he didn’t need to go see what else was out there. That all he wanted was me. But he didn’t.”

  “And now it’s too late?”

  Mary shook her head. “I still love him.”

  Lucy traced her fingers around the top of her beer can for a moment. “Why do you think he came back now?”

  Mary shook her head. “It’s my fault.” She sighed. “Have you ever had a weak moment when you did something stupid?”

  She laughed. “Are you kidding? Especially when it comes to men.”

  “I found his address online since I didn’t have his cell phone number or email, and he wasn’t anywhere on social media. I wrote him a letter, late at night in a nostalgic mood.” Mary shook her head. “Even as I wrote it, I knew I’d never mail it.”

  This was news. “You didn’t mail it?”

  “I did put it in an envelope with his address on it. I was staying out at the ranch because my horse was due to have her colt that night. I forgot about the letter—until I realized it was gone. My aunt Stacy saw it and thought I meant to mail it, so she did it for me.”

  Lucy leaned back, almost too surprised to speak. “So if your aunt hadn’t done that...”

  Mary nodded. “None of this would have probably happened, although Chase says he was planning to come back anyway. But who knows?”

  The woman had no idea, Lucy thought. “So, he’s back and he’s ready to settle down finally?”

  “I guess.”

  She sipped her beer for a moment. “Is that what you want?”

  “Yes, I still love him. But...”

  “But there is that adorable deputy,” Lucy said with a laugh. “Sounds like a problem we should all have. And it’s driving Chase crazy with jealousy.”

  “You’re right about that. He can hardly be civil to Dillon when they cross paths. He says there’s something about the guy that he doesn’t trust.”

  “Obviously, he doesn’t want you dating the guy.”

  “I’m not going out with Dillon again, and it has nothing to do with what Chase wants. I didn’t date for a long time after Chase left. I was too heartbroken. I finally felt ready to move on, and I wrote that stupid letter.” She drained her beer, and Lucy got up to get her another.

  “What about you?” Mary asked, seeming more comfortable now that she’d gotten that off her chest and consumed two beers.

  “Me?” Lucy curled up on the couch again. “There was someone. I thought we were perfect for each other. But in the end, I was more serious than he was.” She shook her head. “You know what I think is wrong with men? They don’t know what they want. They want you one day, especially if there is another guy in the picture, but ultimately how can you trust them when the next minute they’re waffling again? Aren’t you afraid that could happen if Dillon is out of the picture?”

  Mary shook her head. “I’d rather find out now than later. Trust. That is what it comes down to. Chase broke my trust when he left, when he didn’t answer my letter right away or even bother to call.” She seemed to hesitate. “There was this woman he was seeing.”

  Her ears perked up. “He told you about her?”

  “He had to after I told him that she’d called me. Apparently, she’d read my letter to him. She called to tell me to leave him alone because they were engaged.”

  “Were they?”

  “No, he says that she’s delusional.”

  “Wow, it does sound like she was emotionally involved in a big way. He must have cared about her a little for her to react that way.”

  Mary shrugged. “I know he feels guilty. He certainly didn’t want her to die. He admitted that he slept with her one night. But that now just the sound of her name is like fingernails on a blackboard for me. Fiona.” She dragged out the pronunciation of the name.

  Lucy laughed. “He even told you her name? Men. Sometimes they aren’t very smart. Now you’ll always wonder about her and if there is more to the story.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Mary couldn’t remember the last time she’d drunk three beers. But as she’d taken the stairs to her third-floor apartment, she’d been smiling. She’d enjoyed the girl-time with Lucy. It made her realize how cut off she’d been from her friends.

  A lot of them had moved away after college, and not come back except for a week at Christmas or in the summer. They’d married, had children or careers that they had to get back to. Even though they often promised to stay in touch, they hadn’t. Life went on. People changed.

  Mary also knew that some of them thought staying in a place where they’d grown up had a stigma attached to it as if, like Chase, they thought the grass was greener away from Big Sky, away from Montana. They went to cities where there were more opportunities. They had wanted more. Just like Chase.

  They had wanted something Mary had never yearned for. Everything she needed was right here, she told herself as she drove out to the ranch. She’d wandered past the state line enough during her college days that she knew there was nothing better out there than what she had right here.

  So why hadn’t she been able to understand Chase’s need to leave? Why had she taken it so personally? He’d wanted her to go with him, she reminded herself. But she’d had no need to search for more, not realizing that losing Chase would make her question everything she held dear.

  Mary found her mother in the kitchen alone. The moment Dana saw her she said, “What’s wrong?”

  She and her mother had always been close. While her male siblings had left Montana, she’d been the one to stay. Probably since she’d been the one most like her mother and grandmother.

  “Nothing really,” she said as she poured herself a cup of coffee and dropped into a chair at the large kitchen table. Sunshine streamed in the open window along with the scent of pine and the river. “Can’t I just come by to see my mother?”

  Dana cocked an eyebrow at her.

  She sighed and said, “It’s everything. Chase’s mother left him this shoebox with diary pages from what appears to be the time she became pregnant with him.”

  “About his father? That’s why you called me and asked me if I knew. Isn’t his name in the diary pages?”

  She shook her head. “Muriel didn’t mention his name, just his initials, J.M. Does that ring any bells?”

  “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t know Muriel well. I’d see her at the grocery store. She came out to the ranch a couple of times. We went horseback riding. Then I heard that she’d left town. Fifteen years later, she contacted me, thanked me for my kindness back when she lived in Big Sky and asked for our help with Chase.”

  Mary nodded. “Well, we know why she left. It appears her lover might have been
married or otherwise unavailable.”

  “That would explain a lot,” Dana said. “How is Chase taking all of this?”

  Mary shook her head. “Not well. He’s determined to find him. But with only the man’s initials...”

  “That’s not much help I wouldn’t think.”

  “I’m afraid what he’ll do when he finds him,” Mary said. “He has such animosity toward him.”

  “It’s understandable. If the man knew Muriel was pregnant and didn’t step up, I can see how that has hurt Chase. But is that what happened?”

  “That’s just it. We don’t know. Either she didn’t include the diary pages at the end or she never wrote down what happened. The last page we found she was going to meet him at their special place and was very nervous about telling him the news. But that she believed their love could conquer anything.”

  Dana shook her head. “So Chase is assuming she told him and he turned her away.”

  Mary nodded. “It’s the obvious assumption given that his mother refused to tell him anything about his father.”

  Dana got up to refill her cup. When she returned to the table, she asked, “How was your date with Dillon last night?”

  Mary looked away. “I’m not going out with him again.”

  “Did something happen?” Dana sounded alarmed, and Mary knew if she didn’t downplay it, her mother would tell her father, and who knew what he would do. He already didn’t like Dillon.

  “It was fine, but that’s the problem. He’s not Chase.” Her mother was giving her the side-eye, clearly not believing any of it.

  She realized that she had to give her more or her mother would worry. “Dillon doesn’t like me seeing Chase.”

  “I see.” She probably did. “So that’s it?”

  She nodded. “Chase isn’t wild about me seeing Dillon, but he’s smart enough not to try to stop me.” Mary tried to laugh it all off as she got up to take her cup to the sink. “Kara says it’s a terrible problem to have, two men who both want me.”