Mended Hearts

by Tammi Lynn

  “Mmm, bacon.” I smack Jesse’s shoulder.

  “Eat the bacon on your plate. I’ll see you guys later.” I still can’t find my phone so grab my purse and head outside.

  Jayson’s waiting by his truck with the door open when I come out so I walk over. “You ready, Sweetheart?”

  “Yeah I’m-”

  “Baby Girl?”

  I was almost to the truck, about to let Jayson help me in his side when I’m stopped short, my heart giving a little spasm in my chest, when Cade calls out from my left. He looks terrible, like he hasn’t slept. His clothes are rumpled like he put them on the day before and there’s dark circles under his eyes.

  “Cade.” A flash of pain goes across them before he puts on his mask, trying to guard himself from me. I wait a moment to see if he is going to say something. Do something. I am not going to be the one to lead this conversation. Instead, he just stands there with a blank expression and clenched jaw. I can’t do this right now, this is going to be a good day. “Come on, let's go, Jayson.” My voice is quiet but I am positive Cade heard it.

  Cade stands up from leaning against the garage door, taking a step forward, and Jayson looks between the two of us. Once again, I wait to see if Cade does anything, but if anything he withdraws. His eyes dark and guarded. “You sure, Sweetheart?”

  “Yeah.” I whisper. He helps me in the truck and I look out the windshield to see Cade hasn’t moved his eyes from me and has walked closer to the truck. I know I should stay and talk it out with him, but at the same time he should have come to me that first night. In fact, I would have fucking taken yesterday or this morning. I’m done waiting for a man to come to me, if he wants to talk he’ll find a time, and I won’t be sitting on my ass, holding my breath waiting for it to happen anymore. I am not that woman anymore.

  When Jayson starts to reverse out of the driveway, Cades face gets harder. He’s mad. Yeah, well so am I. I don’t want to lose him to her, I just need to figure out what to say to him and figure out how to handle it if he decides to go back to her. This is not. I fucking repeat. This is not going to be a repeat of Dre.

  ∞∞∞

  “Mia come on, this way!” Holding Jayson’s hand we watch as Emma runs ahead of us in excitement.

  “The dome is her favorite.” We enter into a big glass dome room, water and sea life swimming everywhere. It’s amazing.

  “This is so beautiful.” Looking around in awe at everything he looks at me and smiles.

  “Daddy! Mia! Look I found Dory!” Emma’s hands are against the glass looking back at us.

  I walk over to her and kneel down to her height. “Where is she? I love Dory.”

  “See her right there?” Pointing with one hand she places her other tiny palm against my cheek and turns it towards a little blue and yellow fish.

  “I see her.”

  “Do you think she’s smiling? Dory always seems happy. Your like Dory, Mia. Your always happy and Daddy says your always forgetting things, like where your keys or phone are.” I hear Jayson chuckle from behind us and turn to see him snapping a quick pic of us.

  “Oh he did, did he?” I grin trying to think how I could get him back for that.

  “Yep, he also told me you were lost and that him and my uncles found you. Marlin and Nemo did that for Dory, they found her when she was lost.” My heart squeezes at the words that came from her mouth. What a beautiful way to explain it to her.

  “He’s right they did. They found me”

  “They’re your heroes! Their mine too.” She grabs my hand in one of hers then grabs her dads. “Come on, let’s go to the tide pools.” While she’s pulling us from the room I can feel Jayson’s eyes on me, searching my face. I smile back at him over the little blonde between us.

  When we get to the tide pool Emma runs around to find a sea slug and I sit at the edge of the pool and put a hand in, skimming it back and forth through the water. Jayson sits next to me and puts a hand on my turned knee. “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Nope, not today.” The smooth texture of a stingray slips under the tips of my fingers and I smile up at him. “I’m enjoying the day exactly how it is.”

  We stay and walk around the aquarium for about an hour more making sure to see the otters. It’s feeding time, so there’s a big crowd around, but we find a spot to watch.

  “Daddy, I can’t see.”

  “Here, I’ll pick you up.”

  Jayson reaches down for her but she turns to me. “No, I want Mia to.” My heart swells, this little girl is already wrapping me around her little finger. I pick her up and hold her to where she can see the otters and Jayson puts his arm around us both, giving my arms a squeeze.

  “You guys ready to go? We need to drop Emma home and get to the airport.”

  “Yeah, I’m tired. Will you carry me Mia? My feet hurt.” Miklo used to pull the same thing at her age to get me to carry him around. Not that I minded, I wanted to be able to hold him close for as long as I could.

  “Of course.” She lays her head on my shoulder and we start to walk out.

  “You okay with her? She can get heavy quick.”

  “I got her.”

  ∞∞∞

  Last night on the way home Miklo went on and on about his trip. He had a blast at the basketball game with his Dad and brothers. Said they even got to go down onto the court and meet some of the players. He was tired from the flight though and headed to bed straight after dinner. I didn’t know what to tell him when he asked where Cade was, his car hadn’t been home either.

  Jayson asked me if I wanted him to stay but I told him I wanted to starfish it out for the night and get some rest for work today. I dreamt of Cade the whole night, standing before me but just out of reach. I couldn’t touch him and he wouldn’t answer me when I spoke to him, like I wasn’t right in front of him. I swear I could even smell his cologne.

  Today dragged ass at work, the minutes ticking by and it’s finally over. Cassie, Felicia, and I are all walking out together and I’m digging in my purse to find my keys.

  “Holy shit, Mia.” Felicia grabs my arm to stop my searching and I lift my head to see what’s stopped her.

  “What. The. Fuck.” My truck is sitting on all four rims, each and every tire slashed. I can’t move, just stare at it for awhile before my feet can move again and I get closer. I walk around it to see one and a half inch slices in each tire. “Fuck.”

  “Who would do something like that to you?” Cassie walks around the truck with me and stops by the driver side window. “You make any enemies recently Mia? Look at this.”

  I stand next to her and see a kiss in bold red lipstick on the window. I know who did this. Nichoal was wearing that same shade of lipstick the other night. What a bitch. My anger flares and I feel my body heat up, who even does shit like this? A mean girl. A crazy ass fucking mean girl does shit like this. “Can one of you please call a tow truck for me?”

  “You don’t want me to call Cade? Or one of the other guys?” Felicia is looking at me shocked. She knows Cade’s the one who fixed and replaced my tire the last time it was flat.

  “No, that’s okay. Just a tow truck.” My teeth are grinding with tension, I can’t believe she pulled this. I haven’t done shit to her. I’m just going to handle this myself though, they don’t even have to know about it. No drama. I didn’t want Cade coming to the rescue. If that conversation was going to happen it was going to be because he started it and not because I have to get a fucking ride home from him.

  Felicia walks off to make the call and Cassie stands in front of me. “You okay? I mean this?” she throws her hand out towards the truck. “This is some bullshit.”

  “Yeah, maybe they thought my truck was someone else’s.” She eyes me, she knows I’m not telling her everything, but they learned months ago it’s not easy to get all the juicy gossip out of me.

  “Fine, keep it to yourself, we’re here if you need us. We’ll wait with you until the tow gets here.”

>   The tow truck only took ten minutes to get here but getting the truck on it with all the tires flat took the driver awhile. “Okay, I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

  “Are you sure you don’t want us to take you home and you can pick up your truck later? It’s probably going to take awhile.”

  “Nah, that’s okay, I’d rather just get it done and get it home.” If I go home and need a ride to pick it up the guys will wonder what happened. They reluctantly get in their car while I get into the truck and drive off with the driver to the tire shop.

  Chapter Nine

  It’s All Yours

  Cade

  “Dude, if you aren’t going to answer your fucking phone then put it on silent, it’s distracting me.” Trying to keep myself busy and my mind on anything but Mia and Nichoal, I got Jesse to come outside and shoot a few hoops with me. It’s freezing cold out here and the driveway’s icy but it only helps to clear my head. I also came out here to catch Mia when she gets home, actually... she’s really late now. Where is she?

  I don’t want to turn my phone off or silent in case Mia calls. I need to hear her voice. “It’s Nichoal. She keeps trying to get me to go over.” Jesse stops dribbling the ball and glares at me. “I don’t know what the fuck to do man.”

  “Well, figure it out quick, asshole cause your starting to piss me off. You can’t just stay undecided about something like this.” Of course we’ve had arguments and disagreed a lot in the past twenty years but his anger makes me feel guilty. I know what I do affects them all too with this.

  I hear a text come in and decide to check it, pulling my phone from my sweater pocket.

  Max: Hey man, just thought you’d like to know I just saw Mia pull up in a tow truck at the tire shop. Saw her from across the street at the gas station. Her trucks fucked man, all four tires flat.

  “What the fuck? Jesse call Mia, now, she hasn’t been answering when I call.” What the fuck happened? No way could her tires all go flat at once, I replaced them all myself a few months ago. Why didn’t she call me, or one of the guys? Fuck.

  “Why? What’s going on? I can’t call her, she lost her phone the other night, she doesn’t have it, goes straight to voicemail.” I turn fast to head towards my car. I gotta go get her, why the fuck wouldn’t she call me? I could have helped her out. It hurts to think she might not have trusted me to pick up or show up, and my anger deepens, but at myself. Jesse reaches out and grabs my arm to stop me. “Don’t do it Cade, calm down. Whatever it is let me handle it.”

  “No. I got it.”

  “Then I’m coming with you, at least tell me what happened. Fuck, if it’s Mia you better tell me.”

  Shrugging from his hold, I open my car door and get in. “I’ll be back.” I want to see her alone.

  “Fuck, Cade!” I can see him flip me off in the rearview, before pulling out his phone.

  I fly to the shop making it in ten minutes and storm through the door. I can feel the connection between us crackle when I enter. Her eyes turn to find me and widen. I know she can feel it too. Shit. She’s so fucking beautiful it actually hurts my chest.

  I snuck into her room last night to see her. I wanted to touch her, to curl up next to her and hold her but I didn’t want to wake her up, so I sat in the chair in the corner for awhile and just watched instead. She started the night spread out across the bed, only to end up curled up with an extra pillow in her arms. When her sleep became fitful as if she was having a nightmare I couldn’t stay any longer without scooping her up. So I took my sorry ass home and laid in bed thinking over everything.

  “Cade? What are you doing here?” She stands and I walk towards her.

  “Come on, I’m taking you home.” Grabbing her hand I start to pull her back towards the door.

  Her feet plant into the ground and she stops, taking her hand back. “Stop. I’m staying right here till my trucks done.” Stubborn ass.

  “We’re leaving.” Catching the shop owners attention, I yell out. “Mario, whatever it costs put it on my bike shop account, we’ll be back for the truck tomorrow.

  “You got it, Cade.”

  Reaching out I take hold of her hand again and pull her out the door towards my car. “What the fuck happened, Baby Girl?” I hear her inhale, her body tensing, and turn towards her when we get to the passenger side door.

  “At least I’m Baby Girl, again.” She said it under her breathe and I couldn’t make it out.

  “What?”

  “Nothing. Just let me go, call someone else to pick me up.” Ouch, that hurts.

  I release her hand and it falls to her side. She’s legitmately pissed at me.“I don’t want to ask again, what the fuck happened to your tires?”

  “They were all slashed.” She looks away from me, watching the traffic go down the street. What the hell? Who would slash her tires?

  “Who did it?”

  “You should know.” Why the fuck would I know? She doesn’t think I did it does she?

  “What the fucks that supposed to mean? Just get in the car, Baby Girl.”

  Her hands plant on her sides and she cocks her hip. “No.”

  “No?” Taking a step forward, she takes one back.

  “No.” I reach out to her and she takes off making me chase her. As if she could outrun me. I grab around her waist and hall her up and over my shoulder, her fists beating on my back. “Let me go, Cade.”

  With one hand I open the car door and place her inside. “Just stop, you’re going to sit right there and I’m taking you home. You will tell me what happened.” Crossing her arms she deflates into the seat and I close the door before going around and getting in the drivers side. “Just tell me, Baby Girl. Who did this?” Who do I need to fuck up?

  “Why don’t you ask your fiance?” What? Her words come out in a growl and I look over as I pull out onto the street to see her jaw clenched tight.

  “I don’t have a fiance. You mean Nichoal?” Why would Nichoal do something like that? “Nichoal wouldn’t slash your tires.”

  “So you’re defending her? Wonderful. And by the way, according to her she’s your fiance.” When did they even talk? Mia’s livid, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her this mad before. On cue my phone starts ringing in my pocket and she looks over at me. “Besides, her lipstick kiss to my window was pretty nice evidence.” I can’t believe this.

  “I just don’t understand why she would do this. She doesn’t even know you.”

  “Really Cade? You think that matters? Nichoal saw you dancing with me, that’s all the fuel she needed.” We both grow silent, and she doesn’t say anything again till we’re almost home. I can feel the tension growing and it was like the farther we got away from the situation, the harder it was to talk about.

  “Why, Cade?” My phone rings again and I look to see her eyes watching out her side window. “Why didn’t you come to bed the other night and at least talk to me?”

  Fuck. I hurt her. I never wanted to hurt her. I can hear it though, the pain in her voice. My head drops as I pull into her parking space. Neither of us get out. “I didn’t know what to say. I mean fuck, she was gone, missing, for three years! I loved her.” At least I think I had. Do I still? I haven’t been able to talk to her since the party when she told me where she’s been. I just needed to get my head on straight. Not that my drinking the past few days have helped with that.

  Mia’s small hand grips the door handle and I know she’s about to get out. I don’t want her to leave. She looks back at me and I can see that her dark eyes are glossy with the start of tears, “Do you want her back?” I know she is asking if I still love Nichoal.

  “I want you.” Can’t she see that? It’s taking all my restraint not to hall her into my lap.

  “That’s not what I asked, Cade.” The door opens. “Find out what it is exactly that you want and let me know. I know it sounds selfish of me, especially with all you guys have done for me and how you’ve been here for me, but I can’t do it again, Cade. I can’t wait on the s
idelines again while the guy I want to be with decides if they want to be with someone else. I won’t do it. I may be stronger now but I wouldn’t survive it. Not with you”

  She’s going to walk away again. She keeps running from me and it kills me every time. “Stop, don’t run from me, Baby Girl.” Not that I wouldn’t chase her again. I’ll always chase after her.

  “I’m not running, you know where to find me. Talk to her and let me know.” She gets out and the door shuts behind her.

  I sit there in the car as she walks into the house, my phone ringing again. I have to figure out what the fuck to do so I answer it. “Nichoal.”

  “Hey Valentino, you finally answered for me. I want to see you babe." her voice lowers seductively. "It’s been so long since we’ve spent any time together. We can have a little fun.”

  Where I would have wanted to hear her voice every day for so long, it doesn’t bring any of those strong feelings back to me now. I’m still pissed. “Meet me at Joker’s tomorrow around five after I get off work, we need to talk.”

  “Wow, Cade, I like when you get all bossy with me, this is a new side to you.” Yeah, a side I acquired because of her absence.

  “Just be there.” I hang up the phone and reverse back out of the driveway.

  I just cruise around for hours, running everything over and over in my head. I want Mia, I love her. But what do I do about Nichoal? I won’t put Mia through what Dre did. I’m glad she said she wouldn’t wait, she’s stronger now and I feel proud of her for standing her ground. Even if it was against me. I can totally spank her ass cherry red for it later, but still proud of her.

  It’s late when I finally get home and go up to my room. Laying down on top of the covers it takes me all of five minutes before I start fidgeting. I can’t sleep without her. The past few nights have been hell. I need her. To feel her next to me. I get up and head downstairs, all my brothers are in the living room watching tv.

  “Hey Bro, where’re you headed?”

  “Next door.”