by Pip Bird
‘Woohoo, school trip!’ shouted Darcy, flinging her hands in the air.
Seb and his unicorn, Firework, started beatboxing while the class chanted, ‘School! Trip! School! Trip!’ except Flo, who was yelling, ‘Sloths, sloths, sloths!’
Miss Glitterhorn clapped her hands several times to get their attention. ‘Please stop cheering, so I can make the safety announcements!’ she shouted.
‘Yay!’ cheered Raheem.
‘Firstly, please stay seated on the bus at all times with your seatbelts on,’ Miss Glitterhorn said.
Darcy’s hand shot up. ‘But, miss, you’re standing,’ she said.
Miss Glitterhorn sighed. ‘I will sit as soon as I have completed the announcements, thank you, Darcy.’
‘Maybe you could hook your seatbelt round your leg?’ said Darcy, helpfully.
‘Thank you, Darcy. Anyway!’ said Miss Glitterhorn. ‘We are on our way to BARCC. This is a very important school trip to learn all about the animals in our world and how to take care of them –’
Both Jake and Darcy had their hands up.
‘What about the quest?’ said Jake.
‘Yes, there will be a quest,’ said Miss Glitterhorn. ‘This will be explained in more detail when we’re there. Mira, do you have a question?’
Mira had her hand up as far as it would go and was waving it around madly. ‘Are there kitticorns at BARCC?’ she blurted out.
An oooooooh rippled around the bus.
Miss Glitterhorn smiled. ‘Well, I believe that there currently are caticorns at BARCC, which means there might also be kitticorns! So, if we’re very lucky, we just might see them. BUT they are very shy animals, so don’t get your hopes up.’
Mira squealed and leaned forward to talk to Darcy. ‘Even Rani didn’t see any kitticorns when she went to BARCC. I can’t believe we might get to see some of the most awesome, cute creatures in the whole world!’
‘They can’t possibly be cuter than us, Star,’ said Darcy, and she took a quick selfie with her unicorn on her phone.
The road was getting a bit bumpy and Miss Glitterhorn gripped the seats in front of her to stay on her feet.
‘Oops!’ she said. ‘Where was I? So, what’s really important about this trip to BARCC is that we learn how to care for our animal friends and the world around us. So, pay attention at the centre and – whooooaaaa!’
The bus turned a sharp corner and Miss Glitterhorn tumbled on to the front seat.
Everyone giggled but Mira stared out of the window, lost in a daydream where she was cuddling lots of gorgeous, furry kitticorns . . .
Class Red had been on the bus for an hour already and were nearly at the top of the Crystal Mountains. Mira turned round to look through the back window of the bus. Behind them lay the Fearsome Forest. They’d never been this far away from Unicorn School before!
For the last twenty minutes they had been playing lots of fun games, including Burp Alphabet (which Miss Glitterhorn had quickly banned). Now they were playing a game called Would You Rather, which Mira’s sister had taught her.
‘Would you rather have a bum for a face or a face for a bum?’ said Darcy. Most people went for a bum face.
‘Would you rather have a pet sloth or a pet kitticorn?’ said Mira. Everyone except Flo said that one was really hard.
‘Would you rather eat a poo or wear a hat made of poo forever?’ said Darcy. Most people chose a poo hat.
‘Would you rather have a pet kitticorn or a UBFF ?’ said Freya, and all the unicorns snorted crossly. Everyone said UBFF, except Mira who said ‘Fluff ’ because she was daydreaming about what she would call her pet kitticorn.
‘Would you rather eat a poo or have Dave as your UBFF ?’ said Jake, with a mean grin.
Everyone gasped and looked at Mira and Dave.
‘Actually maybe Scamp . . . what?’ said Mira, still in her daydream.
‘I would rather eat a poo than sit next to Jake !’ said Darcy, defending Mira and Dave.
‘Well I would rather LIVE in a poo than sit next to you!’ Jake called back.
‘Well I would rather be MADE OF poo than have to sit next to YOU!’ shouted Darcy.
Then Miss Glitterhorn said that all games mentioning poo were banned and why didn’t they play something nice like I Spy.
‘I spy something beginning with P,’ said Darcy.
Miss Glitterhorn gave her a warning look.
Soon it was Mira’s turn.
‘I spy . . .’ said Mira, ‘something beginning with . . . S.’
‘Sloths?’ guessed Flo.
‘No.’
‘Spiders?’ Freya called out. Brave, Raheem’s unicorn, whimpered. He was just a teensy little bit scared of spiders.
‘Nope!’ said Mira.
Freya tried again. ‘Snow-capped mountain?’
Raheem tutted. ‘That doesn’t count as an “s”, because “mountain” begins with a –’
‘Yes, that’s right!’ said Mira quickly. ‘Your turn!’
The bus started going down the other side of the Crystal Mountains. The road was steep and very twisty.
Freya thought for a minute. ‘I spy . . . something beginning with . . .’
‘Sssssss,’ said Tamsin.
‘It’s MY turn!’ said Freya with a frown.
‘Can’t we have another letter?’ said Raheem.
‘Ssssick!’ Tamsin was groaning and looked rather green. She was clutching her tummy. ‘I feel sick. Miss! I feel sick.’
Miss Glitterhorn quickly ushered Tamsin to the front and gave her a bag to be sick in. ‘Will someone please swap seats with Tamsin?’ she asked.
Dave was already moving back to sit in Tamsin’s seat. Mira quickly followed him.
Jake grumbled as he moved to let them sit down. ‘Make sure your unicorn doesn’t fart near Pegasus,’ he said. ‘It upsets him.’
Mira gave Dave a protective pat, and Dave let out a gigantic fart. Pegasus turned to face the window. Then Flo popped her head over the seat in front, quickly followed by her unicorn, Sparkles. Flo started asking Mira a million questions about the kitticorns.
‘What do they eat? Where do they sleep? Which eats more, a kitticorn or a puppicorn? What do they like to play with?’
Mira took a deep breath and answered. ‘Kitticorn treats, somewhere warm and smelly, a puppicorn and balls of rainbow wool. Kitticorns can bounce the balls on their noses!’
Flo squeaked. ‘Sooo adorable!’
‘Yup,’ agreed Mira with an enormous grin. ‘I have a book called Kitticornucopia. I can’t believe we are going to get to snuggle and cuddle them and kiss their little kitticorny faces!’
Something suddenly hit the side of Mira’s head. It was her apple. She turned to see Dave had opened her lunchbox. Dave picked up the apple again and threw it in the air, trying to bounce it on his nose. This time it flew across the back seats and landed on Pegasus’s horn. Mira leaned over, pulled the apple free and put it back in her lunchbox.
‘Psst,’ Raheem whispered to get Mira’s attention. ‘What do you think the quest is? Miss Glitterhorn didn’t really say anything. Do you think it’s a test?’
‘I don’t know. I’m sure it will be fine, Raheem,’ said Mira.
Darcy waved her hand in the air. ‘Miss, are we nearly there yet?’
Miss Glitterhorn sighed. ‘No, Darcy. We’re about halfway. Look, here’s the map of BARCC to be looking at in the meantime.’
Mira spotted BARCC first. Sunlight was glinting off the gold-rimmed rainbow sign on the gates.
‘We’re here! We’re here!’ she cried.
The rest of Class Red stood up to see, and Miss Glitterhorn had to ask them to sit down again. Colin the Caretaker tooted the Rainbow Bus horn as they passed through the farm gates and everybody cheered. As soon as the bus stopped, all the pupils and unicorns scrambled off the bus.
‘Come back, class!’ Miss Glitterhorn was trying to get everyone to line up back at the bus. ‘Mira, stop jumping up and down.’
‘WHERE ARE THE KITTICORNS?!’ Mira yelled.
‘And also calm down, please,’ said the teacher.
‘Well, hello there kids, you must be Class Red from Unicorn School!’ said a voice.
‘What is THAT?’ Darcy looked appalled as she wheeled off the ramp.
A muddy green tractor, pulling a large trailer, tooted its horn and pulled to a stop next to the Rainbow Bus. Out jumped a short, wide man with large socks rolled over his hiking boots, long straggly hair and a wiry grey beard. He had his hands on his hips and lots of things sticking out of pockets all over his shirt and shorts.
‘Good morning, everyone! I’m Bruce Hasslehoof, chief warden here at the Baby Animal Rainbow Care Centre. Let’s get ready to rumble!’
Raheem shivered and nudged Mira. ‘I don’t want to rumble.’
Mira tried to give him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, but she couldn’t stop grinning at the thought of kitticorns being somewhere nearby!
‘We have a super-exciting day planned for you all. We’re going to take a tour round the farm in this tractor trailer, stop off for the morning’s awesome activity, then have lunch, then enjoy this afternoon’s awesome activity,’ Bruce explained.
Darcy’s hand shot up. ‘What are the awesome activities?’
‘It’s a surprise!’ said Bruce, winking at Darcy.
‘Is it really true that there are kitticorns here?’ Mira asked. She had stopped jumping but was now hopping from foot to foot.
Bruce smiled. ‘Yes! There is a caticorn here with her kitticorns. But they’re tucked away somewhere, safe in their nest. Caticorns are easily scared, you know!’ He clapped his hands. ‘Come on into the yard, kids, and get some wellies on you and your unicorns. There’s a lot of mud around!’
Bruce and Miss Glitterhorn started ushering the children past the tractor and over to the welly station.
Dave sniffed loudly and started trotting in the opposite direction, towards the Visitor Centre and café. Mira gave him some crisps to tempt him back to the wellies. After wrestling with his hooves for quite some time, she decided that three out of four wellies wasn’t too bad and gave up on the last one.
Everyone else had already gathered by the tractor trailers, where Bruce was splitting Class Red into groups of four and handing out clipboards. Raheem hugged his clipboard to his chest like it was a comfort blanket.
Bruce ushered the children and unicorns into the tractor trailers. Mira was in a group with Darcy, Raheem and Jake. Darcy and Jake pulled faces at each other.
‘Right!’ called Bruce with a great big smile. ‘So, you can use your clipboard to jot down stuff you see and draw pictures – whatever you like. Awesome activity number one, here we come!’
‘What about the health and safety briefing?’ asked Raheem.
‘Oh! Yes,’ said Bruce. ‘Well, the first rule at BARCC is to stay where I can see you at all times.’
Raheem happily wrote down the rule down on his clipboard.
Bruce carried on. ‘And the second rule at BARCC is do NOT take the baby animals home. No matter how cute they are, BARCC is the best place for them!’
‘What about the quest?’ asked Jake. ‘Can I be leader?’
Bruce laughed. ‘You’re a keen bean, I like you,’ he said. Mira rolled her eyes at Darcy. ‘Well, there is a quest, but we don’t need a leader. And anyway, no one has completed it since I did, back when I was at Unicorn School!’
Darcy gasped. ‘What, not in a million years?’
Bruce frowned. ‘I’m not quite that old, young lady.’ He dug out a stack of cards from one of his many pockets and started handing them out. ‘You can attach this to your clipboards. Don’t worry if you don’t have time to complete it. You’ll probably be having too much fun learning all about the baby animals here at BARCC!’
‘Ooh! I love riddles,’ said Mira.
‘This makes literally no sense,’ said Darcy.
‘I thought nothing was going to bark at me,’ muttered Raheem.
‘And, finally, the third rule at BARCC is no eating anything anywhere except the picnic meadow,’ said Bruce. ‘The baby animals here are on very specific diets, and we don’t want to make them poorly.’
There was a loud neigh from Dave that sounded a bit like ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOO!’
‘Good luck, children,’ said Miss Glitterhorn. ‘Now, since you’ll be doing self-directed work on this trip, I’ll just stay behind in the café and look after the shoes. Have fun!’
Mira was trying to get comfortable in the tractor trailer when she felt something tugging at her backpack. She looked around and saw Dave was nibbling on her bag strap. She quietly snuck him a biscuit, hoping Bruce wouldn’t notice. Even though the third rule at BARCC was no eating except in the picnic meadow, she thought one tiny custard cream couldn’t hurt. And Dave NEVER left behind any crumbs.
The tractor started up with a loud rev and Bruce rubbed his hands together. ‘Right-o, kids! This is the exciting bit. You can see on your right there is the sparklecorn field, which is at the centre of the farm. As you know, this crop is turned into hay for unicorns and other animals, but it has many other amazing uses. As well as unicorn feed, it is used for unicorn bedding, arts and crafts materials and even unicorn toilets!’
Raheem was taking notes on everything Bruce said. Nobody else was, although Flo had drawn a picture of a sloth climbing up the sparklecorn.
‘Goats! Look! Left!’ shouted Flo.
Everyone scooted over to the left-hand side of the trailer, making it lean dangerously on two wheels. They waved to the goats and baby goats in small fields.
Darcy giggled. ‘That goat is eating a welly.’ She pointed to a BARCC warden who was hopping on one foot, chasing a baby goat around a field. The baby did indeed have a welly in its mouth.
‘It’s a goaticorn,’ said Raheem, making a note of it on his clipboard. ‘And, yes, a goaticorn will eat anything if it’s hungry enough.’
‘Just like you, Dave!’ said Darcy.
Mira was about to defend her unicorn when she was distracted by Dave trying to get another biscuit by opening the zip of her rucksack with his teeth.
‘Now we are passing the sheepicorn station,’ Bruce continued. ‘You can see the wardens feeding the baby lambicorns with extra milk from a bottle.’
‘Toooooo cuuuuuute!’ Flo gasped.
Bruce pointed out the cowicorns and pigicorns in the farm zone. They also passed a sign for the Cuddle Corner.
‘What’s that?’ asked Flo.
‘Oh, that’s just the llamacorns, slothicorns and koalacorns,’ said Bruce. ‘Not as awesome as our first awesome activity.’
There was only one thing cuter than koalacorns, Mira thought. MAYBE they were going to find and play with the kitticorns as their first activity! That really would be awesome.
‘Here we are!’ announced Bruce.
The tractors pulled up at two red barns and the children excitedly helped their unicorns out of the trailers. There were flecks of rainbow straw lying around the door of one barn. Raheem immediately started sketching the barn on the piece of paper on his clipboard.
Bruce strode to the front of the group, unlatched the door and pulled back the barn door to reveal . . .
‘It’s just full of dirt,’ said Mira. ‘Where are the animals?’
Bruce laughed. ‘There are LOT of tiny animals in here, but they’re just too small to see. This is the Soil Barn! Awesome activity number one is . . . soil sieving! We’re going to look very carefully at what the soil is made of and how it supports life on the farm.’
‘Are you joking?’ asked Darcy.
Cheep cheep!
‘What was that?’ asked Mira.
‘Oh that’s just the chickicorn hatching barn next door,’ said Bruce. ‘Now, my favourite thing about soil –’
Bruce didn’t have time to finish as Class Red stampeded over to the chickicorn barn. He only just made it to the doors before them.
‘STOP! Stay with the soil!’ he
screeched.
Rainbow-coloured straw fluttered out into the farmyard with a chorus of cheep-cheeping. Class Red surged forward again.
‘Well, I suppose we can have a quick look before we start soil sieving,’ said Bruce with a sigh. ‘So this is the chickicorn hatching barn.’
There were bales of rainbow straw piled up on each side of the barn, and different-coloured henicorns sitting on eggs in nests. At the far end there were two long tables with rows of lights dangling above them. Under each light was a carefully made rainbow nest with one or two eggs inside.
‘Chickicorns hatch when their eggs are warm and cosy. Now, some of our henicorns lay so many eggs they can’t sit on them all. That’s why we have these hot lights over some nests. It’s called incubating,’ explained Bruce. ‘And it’s very important that no one disturbs the incubating process. Otherwise the chickicorns could hatch and become confused. So don’t touch anything!’
Class Red gathered round the hatching tables.
‘Is anything actually going to happen?’ asked Darcy.
‘Shh,’ said Bruce. ‘Yes, if we’re quiet, we just might hear an egg cracking.’
The children waited.
The eggs stayed very still.
‘I don’t hear anything,’ said Darcy again.
‘SHH!’ said Bruce again. ‘The conditions for hatching need to be just right.’
As all the Class Red pupils stood quietly, Mira heard Dave’s tummy rumble. Then, before she could stop him, he quickly licked one of the multi-coloured eggs!
‘Dave, no!’ Mira hissed. ‘It’s an egg, not a sweet!’
Tap tap tap.
‘What’s THAT?’ asked Darcy.
‘That’s a hatching sound, SHHHH EVERYONE!’
Mira thought Bruce’s shushing was louder than Darcy’s talking, but then there was another
. . .
Tap tap tap – crack!
A small hole appeared in the top of the egg in front of Dave.
