The Baby They Longed For

by Marion Lennox

  Unfortunately, her job as a child-care assistant in the staff nursery meant it wasn’t as easy to avoid Dr Valdez as she’d prefer when he was a reminder that, despite her vow, she wasn’t immune to handsome men. He was fit in more ways than one with the perfect body to match those dark good looks, honed by all the swimming, running and cycling around the island that had also earned him his sporty nickname. He was a perfect treat for the eyes but that was all he was to Summer, or ever could be. Even if he wasn’t a co-worker—she’d learned to avoid them at all costs in romantic notions, since she couldn’t keep moving after every failed relationship—he only had eyes for one girl around here.

  ‘It looks as though he has a fight on his hands this morning.’ Kaylee, her colleague, had apparently noticed the object of her attention too.

  The love of his life, his three-year-old daughter, Graciela, was one of Summer’s charges and the reason she got to spend more time with him than was good for her. Regardless of the physical attraction she might harbour towards him, they were often locked in battle over the best way to care for his child’s extra needs. There was a personality clash that cancelled out the allure of his outward appearance, even if his single-dad status hadn’t already put him at the top of her off-limits list.

  The last time she’d lost her heart to a father-and-child combo she’d mistaken her ex’s relationship of convenience for love. Whilst she had been throwing herself into that nurturing role to look after his son Leo, thinking it was leading up to a permanent arrangement for them as a family, Marc had been using her as a stop-gap until his baby mama came back on the scene.

  She wouldn’t make the mistake again of giving her trust, her future, to someone who didn’t appreciate her worth beyond her child-minding skills. Since she was already paid to do that for Rafael Valdez, she knew the score. If she let herself get drawn into the middle of another parent-and-child set-up she only had herself to blame this time around.

  She watched Gracie turning round and running off in the opposite direction for the umpteenth time, taking them twice as long to reach the nursery than usual. Instead of demonstrating more patience, her father simply swung her up into his arms and marched on despite her protests.

  Summer had witnessed her fair share of toddler tantrums but a child on the autism spectrum needed extra-careful handling and would have no concept of making her father late for work at any age.

  ‘Something must’ve happened this morning to make them late. He hasn’t even had time to dry his hair.’

  Even from this distance Summer could see his still-wet hair glistening in the sunlight. That wasn’t a big deal in itself, but whatever had caused this disruption to their routine had the potential to become an issue for Gracie. Summer loved working with the little girl but she had communication issues and learning difficulties that often led to these bursts of temper.

  She caught sight of Kaylee smirking at her. ‘What?’

  Okay, so she was imagining Rafael’s dark hair curling at the nape of his neck and soaking his collar. It didn’t mean anything other than she noticed the small details in other people’s lives. People-reading was part of her skill as a child life specialist, even if her job here required more of her child-care services for now.

  Alex Kirkland, the medical director and one of the clinic’s founders, had employed her with a view to eventually moving her into her preferred position. With the extension of the children’s ward in the future she would be needed more in her role as a child life specialist to help the young patients cope with their illnesses and prepare them for whatever medical procedures they faced.

  She was happy to wear either hat if she could stay here, leaving the mess of her personal life back in Boston. It wasn’t as if she was missed when Marc and Leo were back living as a family with his ex and her own mother had her second husband to support her instead of Summer.

  ‘Nothing,’ Kaylee replied, obviously meaning everything as she did a double take between Summer and the two figures she hadn’t been able to take her eyes off.

  ‘Oh, shut up!’ Summer hit her playfully over the head with a soft-bodied panda she’d been minding for one of the children.

  Not for the first time she wondered where the child’s mother was, or any other family for that matter. There was very little known about the spinal surgeon other than what a coup it was to have him on board here. Despite his sterling reputation as a surgeon, she’d found him difficult, stubborn and resistant to taking on any friendly advice. If he had that attitude to people other than her it could explain his single status, regardless of him being so smoulderingly attractive. Even she experienced that flutter in the pit of her stomach when he was near. She’d seen how loving he could be with his daughter so she knew there was a soft heart in there somewhere.

  It might come across as judgemental but sometimes she thought parents often didn’t try hard enough to salvage a relationship when children were involved. Broken families would always be a source of pain to her when they represented her own difficult background. The children suffered most when the parents decided they couldn’t live together and, in her case, not only had she lost her father but he’d taken her stepbrother too, severing all contact between them and leaving her feeling incomplete.

  Robbie may not have been her biological sibling but she’d grown up thinking of him as her big brother, someone she could turn to for advice or comfort, and losing him had been akin to having a limb cut off. Since then, she’d lived her life always feeling as though something was missing, and the loss of a mother had to be even more devastating to a child of Gracie’s young years.

  She never talked about her mom and she’d noticed Dr Valdez didn’t wear a wedding ring so there didn’t appear to be a significant other anywhere in the background. There was a chance he was nursing a broken heart, which would explain his defensive behaviour. It was the same reason Summer had come to Maple Island in much the same mood at first. Perhaps he was finding life as a single dad difficult. Given time, he might get back together with his ex again too, just as Marc had when he’d left Summer out in the cold over a year ago. Apparently, it was easier to share the parenting of a small child with their actual parent rather than someone who’d been learning on the job.

  Men with motherless children were double heartbreak waiting to happen because when things ended you lost them both. Regardless of the love and time given to help raise their offspring, when the relationship was over an ex-girlfriend didn’t have any right to remain in the child’s life. Losing Marc had been difficult, but having five-year-old Leo taken away from her too had been devastating when she’d come to think of him as her own. Until Marc had decided to forgive his ex for cheating on him when she’d asked to come back and, just like that, Summer had been surplus to requirements.

  That bitter taste of loss and betrayal tinged her objectivity. She knew nothing of the secrets the Valdezes might be hiding and she intended to keep it that way, having sworn not to get involved with another family outside the workplace again. If and when she decided to date again, her requirements for a suitor would include being single with no dependants or exes lurking in the background.

  She doubted Rafael had any desire to jump into the dating quagmire either. There certainly hadn’t been any talk of him seeing anyone since arriving on the island and his devotion to his patients, including the ten-year-old Walsh twins who’d suffered severe spinal injuries and were taking up a lot of his attention, didn’t leave him with much down time.

  She might not view him as relationship potential but she could see he was a good father, trying to give his daughter the best start in life and struggling with the demands of juggling his home and work life. It couldn’t be easy for a busy single dad contending with the special needs of an autistic daughter and Summer would never dare criticise his parenting skills but it wouldn’t hurt him to ask for or accept help once in a while.

  Her own mother had been equal
ly as pig-headed when they’d been left as half of a family when her father had taken off, refusing financial or emotional assistance from any quarter. As an adult she recognised how her mother must’ve been hurting badly to be so determined to do everything on her own and prove she didn’t need a man around. Except Summer had been the one to suffer, forced to grow up too quickly and dragged into the conflict between her parents by having to choose which one to live with. She hoped Gracie would never be subjected to that kind of stress when it could have such a devastating impact on her development.

  It hadn’t been fair to Summer as an eight-year-old to put her under that much pressure to pick sides, but emotions had been running high and she’d been compelled to stay with her mother since her father had been the one having an affair. Once she’d made her position known, her father had demanded custody of her stepbrother and moved abroad to start a new life with the woman he’d left them for.

  They’d all been devastated by the split but her parents had wanted a complete separation, things having been said and done that neither could apparently overlook in order to let the siblings maintain contact. Perhaps they’d imagined they had been young enough to forget and would get over it, but she hadn’t and now she didn’t even know where to start looking for Robbie.

  With hindsight she could understand why her mother had chosen never to rely on anyone else after that epic betrayal, but when her health had suffered, Summer had been the only one there to pick up the pieces.

  Unable to work full time, there had been no money to fund things every other child took for granted and it hadn’t been long before she’d been taking on after-school jobs to supplement their income at a time when her teenage peers had been going to parties or shopping for clothes. She’d never resented her mother for those sacrifices but when she had eventually married again Summer had gone a little wild, exploring her sudden freedom and leaving her responsibilities far behind. They hadn’t really been close since. She’d even been replaced at home.

  Summer had no wish to interfere in anyone else’s life but Dr Valdez didn’t have to be Gracie’s whole world. There were no parent-of-the-year prizes for running yourself into the ground, only more problems for the child when there was no one else around to lend a helping hand.

  She’d studied hard to enable her to work with vulnerable children and she knew how much time and patience it took to communicate effectively to make any progress in their development. If he would simply give her the chance, she was willing to share everything she’d learned to make their lives a little easier.

  ‘Hold this for me,’ she said, handing the plush toy to Kaylee, and left her vantage point to meet them in the corridor, persuading herself her actions were based purely on Graciela’s needs.

  When she reached Rafael, he’d changed tactics and was murmuring in soothing placatory Spanish to his daughter. Summer’s school-level Spanish was rusty but she recognised ‘Te amo, mija’, because he told Gracie he loved her each time he had to leave her in child-care to go to work. It melted her heart that he could be so curt with people at times yet wasn’t afraid to express his feelings for his daughter. She wouldn’t have been human if she didn’t wonder what it would be like to have him whisper sweet Spanish nothings into her ear too, or experience the delicious shivers up her neck when she imagined him there.

  ‘I can take her from here if you’d like?’ Graciela immediately stopped fidgeting once she took her hand.

  It had taken weeks to get her to this stage when she’d screamed the place down every time her father was out of sight at first. There were still problems with those who worked with her on late shifts when Rafael was on nights at the clinic, but she was lucky Gracie responded to her so positively.

  ‘We’re fine, thank you,’ he insisted, yet as she dropped Graciela’s hand, the little one began stamping her feet. The low whimpering in her throat began to build until it would soon become that ear-piercing shriek to let everyone know she wasn’t happy. It was difficult for children like Gracie to communicate their needs effectively and the tantrums were often born of frustration.

  Summer stood her ground before Rafael’s stubborn pride, or lack of faith in her ability to do her job effectively, distressed the child any further.

  ‘If she’s happy to come with me now, it means you can get to work quicker.’ It was logical to anyone who wasn’t a helicopter parent, who didn’t trust another soul with the care of their precious offspring, that she was offering him the perfect solution.

  ‘Graciela, would you like to come and have a teddy bears’ picnic with us this morning? You can pick any toy you want and we’ll spread out the tea set for the party.’ Addressing her directly didn’t always elicit a response but on this occasion Gracie made her preference known by clinging onto Summer’s forearm with both hands. Her triumphant smile was a victory for common sense and a sharp contrast to Rafael’s frown, but he didn’t try to sway his daughter any further in his direction.

  ‘Here are her things.’ Her papa shrugged the sparkly pink backpack down his arms to give it to her. As well as proving how comfortable he was in his own masculinity, the girly, child-sized bag he carried for his daughter emphasised the broadness of his shoulders and gave Summer a temporary moment of fancy. She’d seen his muscles ripple at the swimming pool as they powered him through the water at breakneck speed and could easily imagine the upper-body strength he possessed. One flex and he could probably burst the straps as if they were made of tissue paper.

  Simply thinking about that display of machismo awakened her girlish appreciation...and was it hot in here because she was in desperate need of a fan right now? Here was a man so strong in body yet he had no problem setting aside the discomfort many men would’ve shown with such a small act to make his child feel comfortable in her surroundings. He had a gentle way with his daughter she hadn’t fully grasped because he did it in such a quiet way without making a fuss or expecting ebullient praise, like Marc often had.

  Perhaps she’d merely convinced herself Rafael had an inflated opinion of himself because she’d pigeonholed him right along with the last single dad she’d known. There was also the possibility she was finding excuses not to like him because she knew she was developing quite a crush.

  Summer graciously accepted the handover and did her best to ignore the zing that came from the simple brush of their fingers during the exchange. The increased heart rate and tingling sensation where he’d touched her was nothing more than a sign that she knew she was playing with fire here. She shouldn’t be thinking of him as anything other than a parent at the day-care centre but forbidden fruit always seemed that much more tantalising.

  ‘She’ll be fine, Dr Valdez.’ It was her turn to dismiss him so she could get on with her job without having him distracting her with his muscles and sexy accent. She might also have to start wearing mittens if she was to prevent herself from going into raptures every time they came into brief physical contact.

  He bent down to kiss the top of his daughter’s head before walking away.

  ‘Thank you, Miss Ryan.’ He tossed a measure of gratitude back over his shoulder. It should have riled her when she was blatantly an afterthought but she drank it in like an eager-to-please lapdog, thirsty for praise. The only consolation she took from being such a slave to her hormones was that this exchange would probably stay with him for the remainder of the day too. If only because he’d been forced to accept her help in some small way.

  * * *

  Just breathe. Rafael did his best to keep walking and ignore the urge to look back. He didn’t think he’d be able to handle the sight of his daughter happier to co-operate with a member of staff than with him. The whole attraction of coming to Maple Island Clinic had been the idea of having Graciela close, and though he was relieved she’d stopped her theatrics this morning he hated the idea that someone could do a better job than him of looking after her.

  His career was a
lways going to keep him busy but he’d been sold on life here with the excellent child-care facilities Alex Kirkland and Cody Brennan had told him they provided on site when they’d lured him away from Boston Harbour Hospital. Although everything here on Maple Island had lived up to expectations, it hadn’t made the separation anxiety any easier. After his wife Christina had walked out on them he’d been doing the job of both parents and he was under pressure not to fail his daughter the way her mother had.

  So far, it didn’t seem as though he was making a great job of it. Summer made him feel inadequate when it came to looking after his daughter for the simple reason she was doing a better job of it than he was. Regardless of his workload, he always made time for a leisurely breakfast together before he dropped her off at nursery. It was the one meal he was guaranteed to spend with his daughter. He appreciated that quality time together and he was sure that on some level Gracie did too.

  Those rare family moments had been few and far between for him as a child. As Spanish nobility, his parents had always had more important business to attend to and had often dined elsewhere or at different times from their children. When they had been at home dinner had become an elaborate affair where he had been preened and polished before being allowed to dine with whatever dignitaries had been in residence. If at all.

  It was a small rebellion against that regime by making breakfast a casual occasion, eaten whilst wearing pyjamas and before a hair or a tooth had been brushed, but it was his and Gracie’s ritual. He’d slipped up this morning by oversleeping and thinking he could get away with a juice box and a cereal bar on the go. It was never going to be that easy when he’d ripped her from her usual morning routine.