Except somehow, she didn’t. He carried her bag for her, hooked on the handlebars of the bike he’d retrieved from station bike racks. It seemed like a ridiculously old-fashioned gesture, yet quite nice at the same time. When they got to the top of the street in Jericho, where she lived, she paused and said, ‘This is me.’
He looked at the near identical row of front doors. ‘Okay,’ he said. ‘Well, it was very nice to meet you, Chaya.’
‘You too, Noah.’ She swung her bag onto her shoulder and turned to go.
He shifted his weight. ‘Um … would you… like to go out, some time?’ He looked up at her through the hair that was now dry, but still falling into his eyes. ‘Maybe to the cinema…’ His ears started to go red. ‘Or something.’
She had never been asked out before. Part of her was charmed. But no. Talking to a stranger on the train was bad enough. Letting him walk her home was probably worse. She didn’t normally do these things. No. She had to end this now, before she did something really stupid.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said. ‘I don’t date.’
The hope left his face and she felt terrible.
‘I see,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry. I… er… well anyway.’ He turned his bike around. ‘It was good to meet you. I’ll see you around.’
Before she could say anything in response, he swung his leg over to mount the bike and pedalled away down the street.
Chaya turned and walked down the side street to her house, feeling oddly bereft.
When she reached her door, she looked back up towards the main street. She wasn’t sure what she was hoping to see. Not Noah. But what she did see was her housemate Sara, practically running down the road towards her.
She unlocked the door, just as Sara got to the gate. ‘Who,’ said Sara, ‘was that?’
Chaya sighed. Oh dear. She wasn’t going to hear the end of this.
Chapter Five
Gimhana – London, 2004
‘So, Jim,’ said Barry. ‘Have you got a girlfriend?’
They were in a bar, after work. Barry was one of the partners in the firm. Gim had realised some time ago that being competent at this job was all well and good but if he was going to get anywhere he had to be better than anyone else there. And he had to schmooze the partners. He didn’t have the old school tie to help him make connections. Nor did he have an impressive alma mater. He needed people in power to notice him for all the right reasons and he needed them to like him enough that they saw past the colour of his skin.
He was a likeable guy, he knew that. He’d learned early on that people found it easier to like a person who was easy on the eye. So he worked on that too, until he had the grooming thing down pat. He knew how to flirt with people if he needed to, just enough to make them feel good. ‘Attractive’ was an appropriate word in every way.
Barry was still waiting for an answer, so Gim said, ‘I’m in between relationships at the moment. You know how it is.’ He laughed. ‘I guess you could say work is my mistress.’
‘Ah, and a saucy little minx she is too,’ said Barry.
He had been working with Barry’s team for about six months, assisting with the contracts and asset transfers of a complex merger. He’d done good work. He knew that.
Barry knew it too. In fact, he thought Barry was taking an interest in him, professionally speaking, giving him extra responsibility, providing the odd snippet of feedback. If he made this work, he would have someone who could mentor him and help him with his career.
‘Being married to your work doesn’t leave you much time for a social life,’ said Gim, ruefully. Not that he wanted one, particularly. He’d learned his lesson at nineteen. A social life was something to be carried out carefully, quietly and, these days, infrequently. He was yet to meet someone he wanted to see more than twice. Work really did take up a lot of his time.
‘Ah, you’ve got to be careful of that,’ said Barry. ‘At your age, you need to work hard, but you’ll want to think about settling down soon. At least, if you want to stay in the firm.’
Gim raised his eyebrows.
‘A man of a certain age,’ said Barry, leaning forward, ‘is better for having a wife and family. I know it’s very modern these days to share parental responsibilities, but really, if you make it to partner, you can afford to marry someone who will stay at home. Or, if she’s a career woman, you can hire a decent nanny to look after the kids.’ He met Gimhana’s eyes, his expression earnest. ‘The senior partners, they’re… old-fashioned in their outlook, if you see what I mean. They want a conventional sort of man, with a conventional sort of outlook to be part of the group. Not some young buck with strange ideas.’ He looked down at his pint and lifted it slowly. ‘You see what I’m saying?’
Not really. ‘Were you a young buck once?’ said Gimhana.
‘Heh.’ Barry pulled a face. ‘Not for very long. I know when to give up. I got married young, not long after leaving university. By the time I made it to partner, the boys had already been born. The oldest was already in school. It gave us stability and flexibility and the wife was very happy. So… you could say it was the best thing that could have happened to me.’
‘Was it, though?’ He watched the other man carefully.
Barry looked at the ceiling for a few seconds. ‘I think,’ he said. ‘That it was.’ He transferred his gaze back to Gim’s face. ‘You see, Jim, you need to decide what you want. If it’s the lonely bachelor life that allows you to work like a demon and rise to the top, then there are firms who would appreciate that. And starting afresh wouldn’t be a bad thing for you… give you a chance to squash certain rumours.’
He didn’t elaborate what the rumours could be. He didn’t have to. Gim was careful about what he said and did, but people still suspected. Probably because he didn’t date. On a day to day basis, he didn’t care so long as it didn’t affect his job. But if it did…
‘So my advice to you, Jim, is to find a nice girl. Get married. Show them you’re stable and steady.’ Barry nodded, slowly. ‘Yes. I like you. You’re an excellent lawyer and a conscientious worker. You’re a people person. The clients trust you, which goes a long way in this business.’
He had been waiting for an opening like this. ‘Would you put in a good word for me,’ he said, ‘with the other partners?’
‘Of course, of course. That goes without saying.’ Barry smiled at him. ‘I told you. I like you. Just get yourself sorted out.’
Right. Sorted out. Married. Gim nodded. ‘I’ll see what I can do.’
‘Don’t you people do arranged marriages? You could get one of those,’ said Barry. ‘I gather it’s not as horrific as it sounds.’
He chose to ignore the ‘you people’. It wasn’t intended as an insult, although it certainly sounded like one.
‘They’re not forced marriages. It’s more like a parent-organised dating service,’ Gim said. He’d had this conversation before with many different people. ‘All they do is introduce you to each other. Then, if you like each other, you meet a couple of times and… all being well, you get married.’
‘Sounds efficient,’ said Barry.
‘It is, actually. Because your parents are vetting the people you meet, you bypass the whole “will my parents approve of this person” nonsense.’ He smiled, as though he could ever reach the place where his parents would approve of his choices.
Barry chuckled. ‘My parents didn’t approve of my Rosie one bit. Especially when she got pregnant and we had to get married. But, as she rightly points out, she didn’t get pregnant by herself.’ He grinned happily. ‘Never regretted it for a minute.’ He looked at his watch and took a long drink. ‘Speaking of Rosie, I should get back soon. I haven’t seen much of her and the boys lately, what with all the stupid hours we’ve been working.’ He drained his drink. ‘It was good chatting to you, Jim. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.’
‘See you tomorrow, Barry.’ He raised his hand in farewell. Once Barry had left, he leaned back in his seat and stared co
ntemplatively into space. Since it was mid January, the bar wasn’t as busy as it had been before Christmas. Without the Christmas decorations and the crowds, it looked a little forlorn. He stretched out his legs under the table and tweaked the trouser crease. For the first time in weeks, he didn’t have to work late. He could go out, but he didn’t really enjoy going clubbing. It was too tense. He was always expecting something terrible to happen. Besides, he was knackered. No, what he really wanted was a decent takeaway and a movie. He had a couple of DVDs from LoveFilm. He could watch those. He pulled out his phone to check his personal email. Hmm. He really needed to call his mother.
Someone approached the table. Gim looked up and saw one of the other people on Barry’s team, Felicia. One of the bright young things that the company liked to bring in. He had been like that once. Full of optimism. He smiled at her.
‘Mind if I join you?’ she said. She was in her seat almost before he’d said yes. She sat sideways, with her shoulders angled slightly so that she had to twist a little to talk to him. It meant that if he wanted to, he could see down her top. He tried not to roll his eyes. Quite apart from not being his type, the kid was, what? Twenty-three?
‘So, we’re thinking of going to Chinatown and then on to a club. Want to come with us?’ she said.
Gimhana looked at the group of young people near the bar and felt old at thirty-three. They were all so young and full of energy. At least being over thirty had one great advantage. ‘You guys don’t want an oldie like me cramping your style,’ he said. ‘You go ahead. I’m going to finish my pint and head home.’
Felicia’s face fell. ‘I guess your girlfriend will be looking forward to seeing you.’
He thought of his empty flat. His nice, cosy, non-judgemental flat. ‘No girlfriend,’ he said. ‘But I do have a ton of laundry to sort.’ He used a laundry service. His shirts would be waiting for him, neatly stacked on his bed. All he had to do was put it in the right cupboard.
‘Don’t you get lonely?’ she said.
Gimhana admired her persistence. ‘I’d be lying if I said I didn’t,’ he said. ‘But today, I’m just completely wiped out after the week we’ve had. Thanks for asking me though. Maybe next time, huh?’
She made a sad face and left him to it.
They were still at the bar a few minutes later when he got up to leave. He gave them a friendly wave as he passed.
It was dark and cold outside, but it being London, there were people around. Gim dug his hands into his pockets and joined the flow. As he walked, he mulled over what Barry had said. Getting married was clearly the next thing he was supposed to do if he wanted to get on in his career. He could try and move firms. It was certainly an attractive option, but then he’d have to start again, earning trust, building credibility. These days there were firms which were far more open-minded than this one. But still. He was here. He could never be who he wanted to be, so maybe he could be what other people wanted him to be.
He got home to find his answerphone filled with a long rambling message from his mother. He listened to the monologue, smiling to himself. In the middle of it came the snippet, the real reason she’d been trying to get hold of him. ‘I was talking to Mrs Rajasinghe, and she was telling me that they’re looking for someone for their daughter. She lives in London. You could meet for a cup of tea and see how it goes.’
Gimhana stared at the phone, drumming his fingers against the table. Again with the wedding set-up. It was as though the world was pushing him towards looking for a wife. Could he do that?
He washed the smell of the pub off himself, put on jeans and a shirt and got himself a tumbler of whiskey. Could he cope with sharing his living space with someone? He looked round his flat. It was really just a place to keep his stuff and sleep in. He had no great attachment to it. He didn’t even have a huge amount of stuff. He spent most of his time at work. His main indulgence was a big TV screen and a subscription to LoveFilm. He checked the two DVDs he had waiting for him. Neither of them appealed right now. Tonight he needed comfort viewing. He dug around in the bottom of his magazine drawer and found the old VHS tape he’d had transferred to DVD. Jem and the Holograms.
He put it in the player. If he had a wife, how different would it be? He guessed it would depend on the woman. He couldn’t be a proper husband to a woman. He gave the matter some thought and shuddered. Nope. He took a gulp of whiskey before settling down on his sofa and pointing the remote at the telly.
The only way it would work would be if he found a nice lesbian who just wanted a marriage to hide behind in the same way he did. Gimhana liked women, in a general sense. He was comfortable in their presence. He’d even been known to flirt with them. It was fun. He never took it beyond a certain point, because, well, he wasn’t actually interested.
He didn’t know any suitable Sri Lankan women who were lesbians. Maybe there were some he didn’t know about. Thinking about it, he didn’t know any suitable single Sri Lankan women at all. Not ones he wasn’t related to in some way.
His mother was getting upset that he kept refusing her offer of help. He could just go along with the meeting women thing. Even if he did find someone to marry, the poor woman would want to have children. He took another sip. He couldn’t very well ask his parents to find a lesbian for him to marry.
A burst of noise and the Jem logo came on the screen. Ah. Finally. He settled down to watch, the familiar cheerful rock music wrapping around him. See now, if he got married, how would he get his Jem and the Holograms fix? He couldn’t see any women letting him indulge in that.
No, he was better off by himself.
Chapter Six
Chaya – Oxford, 1995
Although the sun was shining, the air was spiked with frost. Chaya trudged down the high street, satchel clutched to her chest. The cold nipped at her eyelids and the membranes of her nose. Despite this, she could appreciate that it was a beautiful day. Remnants of the previous week’s snow clung to rooftops and window ledges. Everything was rimed with white.
She crossed the road and started walking alongside the long wall, aiming towards the university parks. If she had to walk home, she may as well take the scenic route. The tutorial had been brutal and she could do with something nice to take her mind off the scathing criticism of her essay. What didn’t kill you made you stronger… but right now she was wondering what on earth she was doing here, pretending to be clever enough to keep up.
There was a squeal of brakes and she jumped instinctively out of the way. When she looked across to see if the cyclist was okay, he grinned at her. ‘Hi Chaya.’
‘Noah.’ Her heart rose. She should be polite and distant, so that she didn’t give him the wrong idea. Her head remembered this, but her face didn’t. She beamed at him. ‘How are you?’
‘I’m fine thanks, you?’
‘Just finished a tutorial. I’m heading back home.’
‘I’ll walk with you.’ He pushed his bike and fell into step alongside her. ‘So, how’ve you been?’
She glanced at him sideways. He had popped into her thoughts over the past few weeks, far more often than she’d liked. Thinking about him had been oddly exhilarating and seeing him again was making her feel fluttery and excited. Which was ridiculous.
They walked along in awkward silence for a few yards, when Noah suddenly said, ‘I was thinking about writing to you.’
‘Oh?’
‘I knew which college you were at… and…’ He cleared his throat. ‘I’ve thought about you a lot.’ He was looking straight ahead.
‘That’s nice,’ she said and cringed at the blandness of her reply.
Another awkward silence. Chaya cast about for a topic of conversation, something that didn’t take them anywhere contentious. ‘It’s a beautiful day,’ she said. The weather was always a nice, neutral topic. ‘The city looks like a postcard.’
‘Yes. It does.’ There was a hint of relief in his voice. ‘Do you get snow in Sri Lanka?’
She shot him a glan
ce. Was he being funny?
‘I meant, in the hills. They’re quite high mountains in the middle and I wondered…’
Ah. Okay. He’d taken the trouble to look it up. ‘No,’ she said. ‘I don’t think it snows, even up there.’ She couldn’t help but feel pleased that he’d looked stuff up about Sri Lanka.
‘What do you miss most about home?’ he said.
‘That’s easy! The sunshine.’ She laughed and so did he. The sound condensed into a cloud around their heads. They walked on, leaving their laughter to dissipate in the air.
By now they were almost at the parks. Ordinarily, Chaya would have gone straight across but today, she followed Noah when he turned to the right to take the longer route. They walked past skeletons of trees and evergreens edged with frost.
‘So, how come you decided to come here to study?’ he said, as they walked along by the river. A lone goose paddled on the water. She noticed that he was careful to keep himself between her and the river. Keeping her safe from the goose, presumably. How thoughtful.
‘Here as in England? Or here as in Oxford?’
‘Either.’
‘I won a scholarship,’ she said, simply.
He looked at her sideways, his eyes wider than before. ‘That’s impressive.’
She supposed it was. It was a means to an end, though. She had applied for so many scholarships, if she hadn’t won this one, she would have won something else. Less prestigious, but still good enough to get her closer to her goal. ‘My family helped,’ she said. When he continued looking quizzically at her, she added, ‘I couldn’t have done it without them.’
A Convenient Marriage Page 3
