Hating to Love You (Houston's Finest #1)

by Erin Rylie

  “All of that being said, I do want to be with you. We could do this separately, share custody and expenses, stay friends, and deny what we are feeling. I’m alright with that, but it isn’t what I want. You’re giving me a family no matter what, and I’m so incredibly grateful, but I don’t want to raise this child without you. I want to wake up with you in my arms; I want to be here to fulfill your insane cravings at all hours of the night; I want to make you smile and laugh. I’m falling for you, and I want this to be a relationship.”

  Rafe got out of his chair, abandoning his food completely to kneel in front of Sophie. “I’m all in, Sophie. It won’t always be easy, and building a relationship with a baby on the way is probably stupid, but I want this. I want you.”

  Tears were streaming steadily down Sophie’s face now. He honestly wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad sign, but he really hoped she’d take this leap with him. He’d meant what he said, though: if she didn’t want a relationship with him, he wouldn’t push it.

  Sophie wiped the tears from her eyes and placed her hand on Rafe’s cheek. “I’m scared, Rafe. Relationships have never gone well for me. I have a terrible track record with men. But, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have feelings for you too.”

  Rafe nodded, not quite sure what to say. His heart was pounding as he waited for her to say the words he wanted to hear.

  Sophie smiled, and it lit up the room. “This might be the dumbest thing I’ve ever done, but I’m all in too, Rafe.”

  His hands were in her hair and his lips were on hers before she could take her next breath. He hadn’t realized how terrified he was of her answer. Rafe had never been great at relationships, always hesitant to open up, always worried women would hear about his past and think of him as tainted goods. It hit him with a startling clarity how much he wanted to be with Sophie, how much this meant to him.

  He put as much reverence into his kisses as he could possibly manage, showing her without words how glad he was that she was taking a chance on them. Rafe kissed her slowly, softly tangling his tongue with hers as his hands massaged her scalp. When he finally pulled away, he leaned his forehead against hers and laughed.

  “I didn’t even need all three dates to convince you. Damn, I’m good.”

  Sophie slapped his chest lightly, pushing him away. “I take it all back, you cocky bastard.”

  Rafe lifted his eyebrows and winked at her. “Oh, am I cocky? Tell me, Soph, just how cocky am I?”

  Her lips twitched as she tried to hold in her laughter, and she returned to her meal, pointedly ignoring him now. That just wouldn’t do. Rafe stood up and leaned over her chair. He bent down and nipped at her earlobe before kissing his way down her neck. It had been three long weeks without her, and his dick was harder than rebar just thinking about sex with Sophie. She tilted her head, giving him more access as he continued to kiss and bite his way down her neck.

  Rafe grabbed Sophie’s hand and placed it over the bulge in his pants. “Cocky enough for you, babe?”

  Sophie groaned. “You fucking tease.” She began to stroke him through the thick material of his jeans, and he knew he could get off from that slight touch alone. He needed to be inside her as soon as possible. Fortunately, it appeared Sophie felt similarly. She stood up and took his hand, leading him into the bedroom where she closed and locked the door before dropping to her knees.

  The sight of her there, on her knees in front of him, made his dick twitch. He sucked in a harsh breath, but kept his hands at his sides, allowing her to take the lead. When Sophie looked up at him and licked her lips, reaching for the button of his jeans, he knew that he never wanted this to end.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Seventeen Weeks Pregnant

  Pregnancy brain was the literal worst. Sophie searched her room again for her purse. She could’ve sworn she’d brought it into her room last night after work, but it was nowhere to be found now. Her doctor’s appointment was in fifteen minutes and her fucking purse was missing. Thankfully, she had her phone so she called Rafe; maybe he could come pick her up.

  He answered on the second ring. “Hey, babe. Are you almost here?”

  Sophie tried to keep the hysterics out of her voice, but she knew she sounded panicked. “No, I’m not on my way. I can’t find my fucking purse, and my damn jeans don’t fit so I’m going to see my doctor in fucking yoga pants. I’m fat and forgetful and I can’t find anything in this stupid house.”

  “Whoa, slow down, Sophie. Take a breath for me, okay?”

  Sophie rolled her eyes. Taking a breath wasn’t going to help her find her fucking keys. She opened her mouth to tell him so, but he was already telling her to breathe in. Sophie took a deep breath and held it until he told her to release. She did this three more times at his urging and she slowly felt the panic begin to leave her body. She placed a hand on her continually growing belly.

  “Feeling better?”

  Sophie sighed. “Yes, that helped. But I still don’t know how I’m going to make it to our appointment, Rafe.”

  “Alright, one thing at a time. How’s our little avocado today?”

  She couldn’t stop the smile that overtook her face; every week Rafe referred to their baby by the fruit or vegetable he/she was closest in size to.

  “She’s fine. According to the book she might start kicking soon. And did you know that she can hear us now?”

  “Sounds like I’ll have to read him some books tonight so he can get used to the sound of my voice.”

  “You can read her Harry Potter. I’ve been wanting to reread anyway,” she said with a laugh.

  Sophie could hear the smile in Rafe’s voice when he replied, “You got it, babe. Our son will be a Harry Potter fan. Now, tell me what you did last night when you got home.”

  “I got home, grabbed some ice—fruit, some fruit from the fridge, and got into bed.”

  “Fruit, huh? What flavor was the ice cream? I’m betting you had Half Baked.”

  She sighed. “You know me too well.”

  Rafe laughed. “ You say that like it’s a bad thing. Go check the freezer for your purse.”

  There was no way she’d left her purse in the damn freezer. She was forgetful, not stupid. People only did that kind of shit in books or movies. Nevertheless, Sophie made her way to the kitchen, humoring him and checking inside the freezer.

  “It’s not—oh.”

  “Find it?”

  Sophie pulled her purse out of the freezer with a huff. “Nobody likes a know-it-all, Officer Pierce.”

  “You fucking love it. See you soon, Soph. I’ll tell the doctor you’re running a few minutes late.”

  She hung up the phone and shoved it into her ice-cold purse, pulling her car keys out and making her way out of the house. As she drove, she thought about the last few weeks with Rafe. They’d spent almost every night together since they’d decided to become a real couple three weeks ago. She’d given him a key to her house for the nights he got off work late, slipping into bed and wrapping himself around her. She loved falling asleep in his arms every night and waking up to his handsome face every morning.

  He’d taken her on a few more dates, each one more fun than the last. None of their dates were the standard fare—he took her to mini golf, to the Kemah Boardwalk (where he won her an embarrassingly large stuffed moose), and even to an evening of Shakespeare in the Park.

  When she pulled up to the doctor’s office ten minutes later, Rafe was standing outside waiting for her. He walked over to the car as she got out, taking her purse from her and helping her out of the car.

  She could get out of the car without help, of course, but Rafe had been treating her like breakable china since he’d found out how badly her back was hurting recently. Last week he’d surprised her with a hot bubble bath after work. The memory of his hot body behind hers, massaging her shoulders and gently washing her, brought a blush to her cheeks. They hadn’t even dried off completely before falling onto her bed, and she’d had to change the
sheets and comforter that night before they went to sleep.

  Rafe took in the heat in her face and tilted his head. “Now what are you thinking about that has you all red?”

  Sophie shrugged. “I was watching Thor last night before bed. I was just thinking about naked Hemsworth brothers.”

  He hummed, wrapping a hand around her waist and pulling her body into his. Her breasts met his chest and he placed a hand on her neck, gently tipping her face up. Rafe kissed her softly, his tongue caressing the seam of her lips, seeking entrance. When Sophie opened for him, Rafe swept his tongue into her mouth once before pulling back.

  “You’re a terrible liar, Soph. And your purse is fucking freezing.”

  She laughed, pushing him away. “Come on, you insufferable man. We have a doctor’s appointment to get to.”

  She’d called the office earlier this week and found out that if the baby was cooperating, they could determine the sex today. Sophie hadn’t told Rafe yet, wanting to surprise him. He thought this would be a standard checkup and ultrasound appointment. She couldn’t wait to find out what they were having and was looking forward to the look on Rafe’s face. He was so sure they were having a boy, but Sophie was hoping for a girl. It had become a running joke with them, arguing daily over the gender of their child.

  They’d been waiting in the exam room for a few minutes when the ultrasound technician walked in to greet them.

  “Are we ready to find out the sex of the baby today?”

  Rafe looked at the technician with wide eyes before turning to glance at Sophie. “Today? Did you know? We’re finding out today?”

  Sophie laughed at the excitement in his expression. He looked positively thrilled, and she was glad she’d kept this surprise from him.

  “Yep! Today our little avocado becomes a boy or a girl!”

  The tech looked between the two of them, a grin forming on his face. “Lie back for me, Sophie. We’ll get the ultrasound started now.”

  She leaned back against the exam table, paper crinkling loudly behind her. The tech rubbed cold gel on her stomach before placing the probe over her uterus. He moved it around for a few moments before an image formed clearly on the screen. Rafe reached down and squeezed Sophie’s hand as the sound of their baby’s heartbeat filled the room. It was one of the most perfect sounds Sophie had heard in her entire life.

  She looked at the ultrasound screen and was astounded to see a tiny human; there were little arms and legs, and she could even see the baby’s ears. Rafe leaned down and kissed her on the top of her head. When she glanced up to take him in, the love on his face as he looked at the screen took her breath away. Nobody deserved to be a father more than Rafe.

  The tech moved the wand around a bit more and then asked the big question. “Alright, are y’all ready?”

  “We have bets on this, buddy. Please tell me you see a little penis on that screen,” Rafe said with a smile at the tech.

  The tech laughed and winced. “Well, I hope you didn’t bet too much money, man. You’re having a girl.”

  Rafe sucked in a sharp breath, staring at the screen a few moments longer before turning to Sophie. There were tears in his eyes, matching the ones in hers. He leaned his forehead against hers, placing one hand on either side of her face.

  “A girl, Soph. We’re having a fucking daughter.”

  Sophie leaned in to kiss him softly. “You’re going to be wrapped around her tiny finger. I just know it.”

  He laughed, a breathy sound. “I think I’m already wrapped around her mother’s finger.”

  Looking into his blue eyes in that moment, bright with tears and so much hope, Sophie knew. She was head over heels in love with Rafe, and she never wanted this to end. It was the most terrifying thought she’d ever had.

  After an emotional day, Sophie couldn’t wait to spend a night in with her girls. Following their doctor’s appointment, Rafe had gone to work, leaving her evening free. It was cult classic night and 10 Things I Hate About You was the movie selection of the evening.

  She’d gone to the bakery after her doctor’s appointment and placed a rush order for a special cake to surprise her friends with. It had cost her a pretty penny at the last minute, but it would be so worth it. Though she couldn’t drink anymore, she’d also picked up a few bottles of wine for her girls, earning her a glare from the bag lady at the grocery store. Sophie had almost told the girl to fuck right off, but had instead smiled and wished her a nice day.

  Sophie had just set out the chips and queso she’d picked up from El Tiempo, their favorite Mexican restaurant in the area. She’d also gotten fajitas and, of course, guacamole. It had been a while since she’d had a cult classic night. Between her crazy work schedule, Kelsey’s messy divorce and custody issues, and Rafe, the timing just hadn’t been right in a while. Tonight though, Rafe was working, and James was with his father.

  She heard the front door open and peeked her head into the entry of the home she shared with Kelsey. Her two best friends were shucking their shoes and purses.

  “Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.”

  Becky looked around pointedly. “Umm, I see pussy, but there are no cats here.”

  Sophie let out a loud laugh before running to greet her friend. “Shit, I’ve missed you.”

  “Likewise, bitch. Look how big you’re getting! In a few months I will be the only person in our friend circle whose vagina hasn’t been stretched out by a baby.”

  Kelsey slapped Becky’s shoulder. “My vagina is not stretched out. Kegels are a wonderful thing, my friend.”

  Sophie shook her head and moved into the living room. She took a seat on the sectional, pulling the bowl of tortilla chips into her lap. She was starving, and had been craving chips and queso for days. At this point, she honestly wouldn’t mind just a straight spoonful of queso. Kelsey went to the kitchen to grab wine glasses for her and Becky while Becky opened one of the bottles of red Sophie had purchased. Kelsey handed her a glass of ice water, poured the wine, and sat in her usual chair. Becky plopped down on the couch next to Sophie, swiping a handful of chips to eat with the guacamole she’d pulled into her own lap.

  Sophie turned on the movie and waited for her friends to grill her. She knew it was coming; it was only a matter of time. Sure enough, before the opening credits had finished, Becky turned to face her on the couch.

  “So, what’s going on with you and Rafe?”

  Sophie shrugged, but couldn’t keep the dopey grin off of her face. “We’ve been dating for a few weeks now. He’s intimidatingly perfect, if I’m being honest.”

  Becky nodded seriously. “Ah, so he’s got the perfect cock.”

  Kelsey laughed, causing the first spit take of the evening. “Son of a bitch, Becky. I swear you wait until I have wine in my mouth.”

  “I’m here to ask the important questions! How many inches? Ten? Eleven?”

  Sophie looked at her friend in alarm. “Ten inches? Are you fucking kidding me? That just sounds painful. Like I’m pretty sure I’d take one look at a ten-inch cock and nope the fuck out.”

  Kelsey nodded in agreement. “I mean, can you imagine trying to give head to a guy with a dick that huge? I can just see my obituary ‘Death by Big Dick.’ It’s not how I want to go.”

  Becky shrugged. “You really just need to have lube and do some prep. As for blow jobs, use your hands ladies, use your hands.”

  Laughing, Sophie replied, “I think your sex life would kill me, woman.”

  “I have done some pretty fun shit. Oh, I was reading a romance book the other day, and the guy put grapes in the woman’s vagina. It kinda sounded fun; I’m curious about it.”

  Kelsey’s eyes widened comically. “I’m sorry, did you just say grapes? In her vagina?”

  “Yeah! He like rubbed them on her clit and then just slipped them in.”

  Sophie jumped in. “Please, please tell me he took them out? That just seems really unsanitary.”

  “He popped them and then fu
cked her.”

  Kelsey did another spit take, reaching for the paper towels on the table before speaking up. “That just can’t be safe. I don’t think I’d ever be able to do that. He’d put them in there and I’m pretty sure I’d tell him to put his damn hand in and pull them out.”

  Sophie nodded in agreement. “And then I’d kick his kinky ass out.”

  Shrugging again, Becky replied, “Y’all are missing out. Big dicks and food play are where it’s at.”

  “I’m not opposed to food play, actually. When Carlos and I—” Kelsey broke off the sentence, seeming to realize what she’d just admitted.

  Sophie hadn’t heard Kelsey talk about Carlos in weeks. She knew that he’d spent the night at their house a few months ago, but Kelsey rarely brought him up. “When you and Carlos did what?”

  Kelsey blushed and took a big gulp of wine, pointing at her cheeks to indicate she couldn’t speak with a full mouth.

  “You can’t hold that wine in your mouth all night. I’m sure you know the importance of swallowing.”

  Kelsey rolled her eyes and swallowed, a blush staining her cheeks as she slowly answered. “Okay, okay. We slept together once. There may have been some strategically placed whipped cream involved. No big deal.”

  “Now I bet he’s good in bed,” Becky replied. “I saw him dancing on my birthday. That man knows how to move his hips.”

  Kelsey clearly didn’t want to talk about Carlos anymore and changed the subject. “Did you know that in ancient Egypt, servants were slathered with honey to keep flies away from the pharaoh?”

  Sophie laughed at her friend’s diversion. Kelsey had a habit of spouting off history facts when she was nervous, something Sophie found both boring and endearing. At least this fact was interesting. Instead of responding, or pushing further, Sophie turned to Becky.

  “I have a follow-up question for you, Becky. Who the hell have you been with that had a ten-inch cock? I know for sure it wasn’t that asshole you dated last year. Ricky, or whatever his name was.”

  Becky’s face paled a bit and she took a steadying gulp of wine before responding. “Yeah, no. Ricky was good with his tongue, but he was disappointing downstairs. You guys remember, um, Reese?”