The Witchdoctor's Bones

by Lisa de Nikolits

  “Hmmm, ja, I get that much,” André said, “but if you ask me, it’s not a good idea for you to stay. Let’s think this through.”

  He massaged her shoulders while he thought out loud. “In terms of evidence, you have none and that makes it tough. It also explains why Jono let the wheels of this particular bus keep turning; he had no real reason to stop it and ditch the suspect player or players. He too had no facts. I mean, for sure, Rydell is one strange goofball, you can see that right off the bat, but what can you do? Arrest him for weird body twitches and a crazy look in his eye or the fact that he’s covered in clothes like an Arab?”

  “True,” Kate sighed.

  “What can you tell me about the others?” he asked.

  “Jasmine and Ellie are fine, Helen’s a moody man-eater, she’ll try to steal you out from under me and Sofie’s lovely, all she’ll do is talk your ear off.”

  “Ay yai yai, so I’m going to be under you, am I?” André clearly relished the idea.

  Kate smacked him lightly on the arm. “Isn’t there anything we can do?” she asked, “about the serial killer? Can’t we tell the police our suspicions?” She leaned back against him.

  “Kate, they’ll laugh at us,” he said thoughtfully, “They want DNA, a weapon, a missing body part in someone’s luggage, that kind of thing and that’s not going to happen. This Rydell guy may be one crazy oke but you can tell he’s clever, he’d never do something stupid. Everything you’ve told me points to how he does a neat job, tidy from start to finish. No sunshine, we cannot do anything, but what we can do is keep you safe, and that, for me is priority number one.”

  They could hear the yells and whoops of the Marula dancers.

  “Come back with me to Swakopmund,” he said again. “Just come back with me, we’ll leave in the morning. You deserve a real holiday and I can’t bear to think of you in danger.”

  She turned around to face him, hiked her skirt up her hips, and straddled him. She put her arms around his neck and leaned in close. “There’s only one thing I want right now,” she said. “And that’s you.”

  They kissed and he cupped her buttocks with his hands and held her tightly.

  André pulled away for a moment. “Let’s get ourselves inside your tent,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Before they all come back and find us naked in front of the campfire.”

  They unzipped her tent and climbed in hand in hand. André’s huge bulk proved a tight squeeze in the tiny tent.

  Kate pulled his T-shirt off him and she reached to unzip his trousers while he hurried to get pull her clothes off.

  “Murder and mayhem aside,” he whispered, “you have no idea how glad I am that I met you.”

  To Okaukuejo

  and the Etosha Pan

  KATE WOKE WITH HER ARM AROUND ANDRÉ’S NECK and her leg draped over his hip. She tucked herself closer into him and he wrapped his arm around her waist and held her tight.

  “Good thing it’s still early, né?” he whispered in her ear. “Time for a quickie, if you’re in the mood.”

  “I believe I’m in the mood,” Kate smiled, “but let’s not rush.”

  Later André groaned. “I don’t want to leave but I must to get my shop open on time. But I’ll see you when you get to Windhoek.”

  He looked at her, his hair sticking up in several directions. “You okay, bokkie?”

  “Fantastic.”

  They climbed out the tent and she waited for him at his car while he was in the washroom. She was filled with a sudden fear and she knelt down and was peering at the underbelly of the Porsche when she heard André laughing.

  “Are you going to give her a quick service before I go?” he joked.

  Kate got up and brushed the sand off her knees. “André,” she asked, “is there anyway you can check the brake line, stuff like that? You may think I’m paranoid but a lot of weird stuff’s gone on, and better safe than sorry.”

  “But why would someone harm me?” He was puzzled.

  “Who knows,” she said, “these people haven’t needed rational reasons to do anything, that’s for sure.”

  André considered what she’d said. “From what we saw and heard last night, they would have had difficulty finding their own tents, never mind a piece of my car in the dark. But I hear what you’re saying and it makes me ask you this: please, come away with me now, just come. You’re right, there’s danger here.”

  “I can’t, André, I must finish this. I know what you’re saying but I’ll be fine. Trust me, I’ll be careful. Please don’t worry and I’ll be in touch all the time.”

  “You’d better,” he said and he kissed her. “Well, I must away. See you soon, sunshine, but not soon enough.” He smiled at her, and spun down the road in a cloud of dust.

  Kate watched him leave and then she went back to pack up her tent and have a shower.

  “Happy, are we?” Stepfan’s tone was bitter, as he stepped into her path near the breakfast table. “You think it’s so easy, find a good-looking man and get him in your grip. You women are all the same, faithless, fickle, no morals.”

  “Whatever, Stepfan,” Kate said and she stepped around him and filled her bowl with cereal and milk.

  “A good night was had?” Jono enquired, trying to be casual. Seeing Kate so happy with André had hurt him deeply. He felt betrayed. She had dumped her boyfriend back home without a second thought; of course she had, for a white rugby player in his fancy Porsche, whereas he, Jono, had nothing to offer. He thought that she’d lied to him, lied to herself and a part of him hoped that André would break her heart, just as she had broken Jono’s.

  “Yes, very nice,” Kate replied, “did you stay and dance the Marula?” She was well aware of Jono’s thoughts and she felt bad for him but there was nothing she could say.

  “I watched for a little bit,” he said, “but then I came to bed. We have another long drive today and I wanted to be fresh and alert.”

  “Fresh and alart are very good characteristics, particularly in a driver,” Betty commented, “Are you trying to tell me there are times when you are not so fresh and alert? Franz, dear husband of mine, he has given me a bad scare more than once. He falls fast asleep behind the wheel and I have to hit him hard on the head and shout at him.”

  “So we’re in safe hands, thanks to you,” Richard said, taking a plate of fried eggs and bacon from her.

  “I am always fresh and alert,” protested Jono, “really, I am.”

  “Which is more than I can say for myself,” Helen walked up and groaned. “Oh, my head. I never drink like that. That Mia. I hope she’s suffering as much as I am.”

  “She is,” Richard assured her.

  “I couldn’t even wake Sofie up,” Helen said, “I’m sure she’s in an alcoholic coma. I shouted at her and she moaned a bit so at least I know she’s not dead. I can’t eat a thing this morning. I’m just going to have some coffee with a lots of sugar. Kate, where’s your gorgeous man, you sly thing? So, it’s a quick sayonara to the boyfriend back home, I take it?”

  Kate shrugged. “I’m going to hang out with André when we get to Windhoek,” she said, “and we’ll take it from there. Who knows.”

  Sofie staggered up at that moment, groaning. “Please somebody, get me a chair.”

  “Here,” Richard helped her sit.

  She put her head in her hands and gave a heartfelt groan.

  “You’re in your pajamas,” Helen pointed out to her.

  “I don’t care,” Sofie said. “I might stay in them all day. Jono, if the road’s a bad one, I might cry all the way too. Is it very bumpy?”

  “The usual,” Jono said.

  Sofie made a noise of pure agony.

  “Everybody, are we ready to hit the road? Where’s Rydell?” Jono asked but no one had seen him.

  Just then Rydell’s tent opened and one of the d
ancers from the night before clambered out, in none too graceful a fashion.

  “Knock me down with a feather,” Kate said, the others equally open-mouthed and all eyes fixed on the tent.

  Rydell emerged swathed in his usual copious layers of clothing. His bruises had deepened in colour and his entire face was a mottled patchwork of purple, red and blue.

  “I thought I didn’t hear him snoring last night,” Stepfan said. “How nice. Everyone was making whoopee except for me. This certainly is not how I imagined my holiday would be.”

  “A consequence of severe mismanagement by your own hand, I’m afraid,” Richard told him shortly. “I am going to see what my buttercup is doing. She went to the washroom a while back. I’m afraid she might have drowned in a toilet bowl.” He walked off and the rest of the group started packing up.

  Half an hour later, they were back on board, ready to bump and jolt their way to the Etosha pan.

  Sofie made a bed in the racks, double-mattressing. She curled up and quickly fell fast asleep, still in her pajamas and wrapped in her sleeping bag despite the heat.

  “I gave her a couple of strong painkillers,” Jasmine said, “I thought she needed to sleep off her hangover. Hola! Kate! I like the look of your new man. You lucky girl, where did you find him?”

  “In Swakopmund, in one of the stores,” Kate was evasive. She surreptitiously checked her phone and was delighted to find a message from André: hey sunshine, am back in Swkp, hope ur ok? Last nite was gr8t

  Kate smiled. It was fantastic! I am fine! Don’t worry!

  u be safe now. xoxo

  I promise. Will be in touch.

  In the front of the bus, Jono was still thinking about Kate and André and he was driving at breakneck speed.

  Betty glanced over at him. “What are you thinking?” she asked. “Are you sad because André arrived to court your girl?”

  “I am not sad,” Jono said through gritted teeth, “And she is not my girl. Whatever gave you that idea?”

  “Maybe the fact that you told Franz and me for hours when you came over after the big dinner? After many beers and a half a bottle of brandy you couldn’t stop talking. Don’t you remember?”

  He did, once she reminded him. “Ah,” he grimaced. “Well, look at her, she likes a flashy no-good gun dealer, what chance do I have?”

  “Oh, Jono,” Betty said softly, “I am so sorry your heart is sore.”

  “My heart will be fine,” Jono growled. “Enough of that conversation, if she wants a no-good loser man, then to hell with her.”

  At the back of the bus, Helen was deep in thought. She bit her lip and stared out the window, her face severe. She was furious with Mia for catching her off guard and getting her drunk like that. She had taken a couple of aspirins and was steadily drinking water to rehydrate her body.

  She was thinking about Kate and André and how life was so unfair; she should have been the one to meet him in Swakopmund. She reasoned that Kate would go back to her life in Canada and pick up where she had left off — she was hardly likely to stay in Swakopmund and Helen could not see André living away from Africa. Which meant that once Kate left, there would be a nice juicy romance left for her, ripe for the picking. She decided she would ask Betty and Jono about André and gather as much information about him as she could, and then, once the trip was over, she would go back to Swakopmund and find a way to hook up with him.

  She clenched her jaw tight, ignored her queasy stomach and throbbing head and pulled her hair into a tight ponytail. No way was she going back to her family; she would be happy to never see any of them again and all she had waiting for her in Canada were dismal gray days and an endless array of salt-covered winter boots. It was high time life served her up something good. Encouraged by the prospect of a romantic future with André, Helen fell asleep, with dreams of Porsches and flashing smiles playing in her mind while the hot African sun beat down on her head.

  Rydell was thinking about his African dancer and he smiled his twisted smile, licked his bruised lips and cocked his head to one side. He massaged the bites he’d had the dancer inflict into the tender soft skin of his inner upper arm. He thought how stupid he had been about Treasure; sure, she was beautiful but last night’s woman was much more to his liking — she had done exactly what he had wanted. He rubbed the bite marks even harder and chortled, causing Kate, sitting across from him, to glower at him suspiciously.

  She was badly in need of the washroom and the way Jono was flying along, like a bat out of hell, her discomfort was even more pronounced. As if reading her mind, Gisela got up. “I’m going to ask him to stop,” she said, as she stumbled toward the cab window. “Jono! We need to stop the bus for a toilet emergency.”

  Jono grunted and pulled over abruptly. Lena, Gisela, Kate and Helen piled off and squatted in a line behind the bus.

  “How far we’ve come in losing our manners,” Lena commented. “When we first started out, we would all disappear behind a bush, very self-conscious. Now we go right next to each other, in the middle of the road.”

  The others laughed. “Yes, one does adjust,” Helen agreed. “When in Namibia…”

  “Are we ready to go now?” Jono called out shortly.

  “A bear with a sore head today, are we?” Helen asked, climbing back on the bus.

  “I want to get us to Etosha, that’s all,” Jono said brusquely.

  “To see giraffes.” Gisela shouted.

  “Lion kill!” said Lena.

  “Elephants for me,” Ellie cried out.

  “Zebras,” Jasmine added.

  “What is all this yelling and screaming?” Sofie demanded, sticking her head out, high above the seats.

  “What animal do you want to see the most?” asked Jasmine.

  “I just want the blood to stop pounding behind my eyeballs,” Sofie said, vanishing back inside her sleeping bag.

  “Don’t drink if you can’t handle the day after,” Stepfan called out.

  “That’s a bit sanctimonious old chap,” Richard said. “At the rate you knocked it back yourself.”

  “Ah yes, but unlike others, I can handle my alcohol,” Stepfan was smug. “I’m always in full control of my physical, mental and emotional capacities.”

  “What emotional capacities?” Lena enquired.

  “It is due to my martial arts training,” Stepfan ignored Lena. “I’m a black belt in many kinds of martial arts, jiujutsu, wing chun, tai chi, karate, judo.”

  “You can’t be a black belt in tai chi,” Jasmine laughed at him. “Because if there’s one thing I’m an expert in, apart from yoga, it’s tai chi.”

  “I’m highly trained, that’s all I’m saying,” Stepfan continued, giving Jasmine a dismissive glance. “My body is a weapon, a finely-tuned machine. That is why I can handle my alcohol. I’m always in full control. Feel this arm,” he said to Ellie, offering her his flexed upper arm.

  “No thanks,” she said.

  “I’ll show you some moves,” Stepfan said. “A young girl like you needs to protect herself….”

  “…From men like you,” Lena interjected.

  “…in today’s world,” Stepfan continued.

  “We should do a yoga class tonight,” Helen interrupted him, “It will be good for us, detox.”

  “Yoga would be wonderful,” Jasmine agreed. “Stretch out our aching muscles.”

  “Jasmine, you could do with some high intensity fat-burning training,” Stepfan started. “I could show you…”

  “Stepfan, sit down and shut the fuck up,” Richard said. “You don’t want to get me started on you, so drop it. Sit down and look at the window. Lovely scenery, lots of rocks and sand, go on, admire it.”

  Stepfan sat down, his face black with anger. “I was only…”

  “I told you,” Richard said, evenly, “to shut it, and I mean it.”

>   “What’s going on down there?” Sofie stuck her head out. “I’m coming down, you are all making too much noise for me to sleep. Are we there yet? Where are we going and why is it taking so long? Oh, my head. Why didn’t anybody tell me I was in my pajamas. How embarrassing.”

  “I wish I’d stayed in my pajamas,” Mia said. “My whole body hurts today.” She had been silent all morning and was pale with dark shadows under her eyes. Her face was healing slowly but she still looked a mess.

  “We are stopping for lunch now,” Jono announced loudly and flatly through the cab window. “As you can see, we are at the gates of the Etosha National Park. Betty has gone to pay, then we will pull over and have lunch and go to our camp from there. Etosha is known as ‘the great white place of dry water,’ and it offers a large variety of wildlife. The waMbo name, eTosha, means ‘white place of mirages’.”

  He leaned closer to the cab window. “We will be staying at Okaukuejo which means ‘place of the fertile women.’ Okaukuejo started as a veterinary post in 1897, then later a small fort was built here as the military stronghold. There is a very high limestone tower which gives you excellent views of the camp and there is also the floodlit watering hole that is very nice at night.”

  He brought his emotionless recital to an end. “Ah, here is Betty, we are ready to go.”

  They drove inside the park.

  “I’m so excited.” Jasmine exclaimed as they got off the bus. “I’ve always wanted to come to Etosha. This is so cool.”

  “Actually, it’s mind-blowing hot,” Richard admitted, red-faced from the heat. “I don’t want to be naff or anything, but I’ve got to dunk my head under a tap and sit down in the shade. I don’t even know if I can eat anything.”

  “Come on, you naff old geezer, you,” Mia pulled out a chair for him. “I’ll pour some water on you if you like. You poor sod.”