Ladies of Pagodaville

by Ellen Bennett

  Doreen asked Alice, “So, how did you get the nickname Lucky?”

  Alice had been sketching mindlessly in the semi-darkness. She closed her sketchpad. “My sister.”

  Lorna said, “Oh, older or younger?”

  “Um, younger. She passed away recently.”

  A silence befell the group.

  “Oh, my God. I am so sorry, Alice.” Lorna gently said.

  Alice brought her knees up to her chest and stared into the fire. “She died six months ago.”

  Lindy asked quietly, “Was she ill?”

  “She was born with Down Syndrome, but she also had heart issues. She was eight years younger than me.” She took in a deep breath, let it out, then continued. “See, Alice is really my middle name. My first name is Lucille. But Cora, that was my sister, couldn’t pronounce it so it came out as Lucky. To Cora, I was always Lucky. So it stuck.” She shifted her body to sit cross-legged. “Cora wanted to learn how to draw, so before I left for college, I taught her about colors and such. She had problems with space and dimension and point-of-view, but she loved to color and paint. Her stuff was cool, kind of like Dali. Rudimentary and without rules. She loved to come down to the pier and paint with me. It was our special time.” Alice bowed her head, tears collecting on her face.

  Doreen said gently, “I’d have to say she was pretty lucky herself to have a sister like you.”

  Alice sniffed and tossed a few small pieces of driftwood into the fire. “Yeah.”

  Lorna asked, “So, was coming down here hard for you? To leave your parents and home?”

  Alice shook her head. “No. It was a light in the tunnel. After Cora passed, I came to a complete standstill creatively. I couldn’t even be in the house. Cora’s spirit was everywhere. My parents were beside themselves. The three of us couldn’t even talk to one another. Cora’s passing left a hole in our lives. I was aimless. Then your ad came up in the Connection, and I was sure some …” She flailed her hand toward the sky. “Some higher power put it there. For me, anyhow.”

  Lorna put her hand on Alice’s knee. “This is a safe place, Alice.”

  Lindy said, “My mother died four years ago, and … and … there is still a big old empty space in my family, too.”

  “My God! I’m so sorry.” Lorna shook her head, adding quietly, “My father died late last year.”

  Alice sifted sand through her hands.

  Lindy said softly, “I am sorry, Lorna and Alice. You know, the years do not take away the pain. They just make it easier to contend with. Sometimes, anyhow.”

  Doreen added, “Well, my father died when I was fifteen.”

  They all looked at one another, then away at the dark ocean.

  Doreen put two more logs on the fire, stirred it up with a longer stick, and said, “I think another round is calling. Don’t you ladies think so?” She stood up and said, “I’ll be right back. I happen to have a six-pack cooling in my fridge.” She kissed Lorna on the lips and headed off the beach.

  Lorna watched her recede into the night, the moon showing only a quarter light. She found herself thinking of her father, as well as Lindy’s mom and Alice’s sister and Doreen’s dad. She thought it was interesting that the four of them decided to remain on the beach after the others left.

  When she turned back to face Alice and Lindy, Lindy was smiling. She said, “I like your woman, Lorna. She’s top-notch and, if you will, quite hot in the looks department. Those eyes …” Lindy did not reveal that she had a major crush on her.

  “Thank you, I rather like them myself.” Lorna noticed Lindy staring at the now empty trail up to the motel.

  Doreen jogged back to the fire area and put the six pack on top of the cooler. “Who’s ready?”

  As they all grabbed a cold one, Doreen settled back down next to Lorna.

  Alice said, “You know when Cora died, it didn’t seem real. I mean, we all knew she was going downhill quickly, but it just didn’t seem real, especially when we came home from the hospital on the night she died, without her. Nothing felt right.”

  Lindy set her beer can down in the sand. “I know. When my mother died—stage four ovarian that they didn’t catch in time—we knew. We were prepared. It was a slow awful drag downhill. Well, we thought we were prepared. She died at home you see.” She took in a deep breath. “We were all around her, twenty-four seven, taking turns at her side. She was never alone. When she took her last breath and the mortician came to take her away, there was this … this cavernous space, the empty hospital bed. It was like it didn’t belong in the house. We were all lost for so long, my brother, sister, dad and me. Just lost.”

  Lorna nodded. “Just awful. I’m so sorry.” She dug her toes deeper into the cool sand. “My father and I really didn’t see eye to eye until I graduated law school. I wished it hadn’t been that way, that we’d had the chance to get to know one another. Or rather, he had had the chance to get to know me. He was so healthy. He went so fast.”

  Alice asked, “Heart attack?”

  “Yeah. Right in the middle of a board meeting.” She snorted lightly. “They, the medical community, called it the widow-maker. Some strange anomaly he was born with. Hidden in the deep dark depths of the heart. He just … went.” Lorna rested her chin on her drawn-up knees.

  Alice asked Doreen, “How did your dad die? Heart attack, too?”

  Doreen looked at Lorna and slowly nodded her head. “You could say that.”

  The group was silent, lost in their own private heartache. Lorna stroked Doreen’s face in the dimming light of the fire.

  Alice sighed, stood up, and brushed off her jeans. “Well, I think it’s time for me to turn in.”

  Lindy followed suit. “Me, too.”

  Lorna said, “I hope you guys sleep well.”

  Lorna and Doreen waited until Alice and Lindy disappeared down the path.

  Lorna took a stick and shoved the embers around. “I wonder what everyone is going to do for Thanksgiving.” She turned and looked at Doreen over her shoulder. “Do you usually spend the time with Vinnie and his boys?”

  Doreen sighed. “Ach, I dunno this year. Last year I was at Bambi’s in Atlanta, and she had her usual cast of misfits over. It was all right but going to Vinnie’s is more fun.”

  “Bambi?”

  “My mother.”

  Lorna raised an eyebrow. “You call your mother Bambi?”

  Doreen chuckled, “Yeah, she always looks like a deer in the headlights. Especially since she decided to have surgery on her eyelids. They were drooping.”

  Lorna laughed, “Oh my God.”

  “What about you? You thinkin’ of headin’ up to Cleveland? See Avril and your mom and brothers and such?”

  “I don’t know either. I kind of want to stay down here with the family. Anya explained that they do a big feast over at Anita and Luis’s house. It sounds like fun. Cleveland is usually such a formal affair. And now with my dad gone …”

  “Sure, I get it. Come here.” Doreen opened her arms.

  Lorna situated herself so she could still feel the warmth of the fire but be close to Doreen. “Maybe we should open up the lobby and kitchen for the people who want to stay here,” she said. “Maybe have Anita and Luis and the family here instead.”

  “Sounds like a good idea. I think it would be fun. I’m not real interested in going to Atlanta, truth be known.”

  Lorna snuggled in closer. “Let’s make some traditions here right here this year.”

  Doreen held Lorna tighter. “What say you we make some history right now on this beach?”

  Lorna climbed on top of Doreen and kissed her. “Great minds ...”

  ELEVEN

  That Same Night

  Lindy tossed and turned and finally flicked on the clamp lamp attached to her drafting table. The clock on the nightstand said 3:22.

  “Crap.” She muttered as she made her way to the bathroom.

  After relieving herself, she went to the little fridge and pulled out a jug of wat
er. She was dehydrated with the remnant tastes of spicy Mexican food and beer lingering in her mouth.

  She quietly opened her screen door and sat down on the top step, sipping the cold water slowly so she wouldn’t get a headache. The night air was peaceful. The nocturnal animals chatted with one another, and insects fluttered around.

  She couldn’t stop thinking of her mother. After the conversation at the bonfire her heart became heavy. For some reason her new surroundings reminded her of Vera every day. Once she thought she smelled Vera’s unique perfume while walking towards the lobby.

  Lindy stood up and decided to walk down to the beach. She needed a good cry. There was something cathartic about crying with saltwater so close by.

  When she got to the water’s edge, she took off her flip-flops.

  Suddenly, something latched itself on to her pinky toe and she screamed out loud.

  “Ow, oh my God! What the hell—?” she shook her foot and backed up from the water. “Get the hell off my foot!” She jumped all over the place, eventually losing her balance and landing on her rear end.

  A voice came from behind her. “Hey, what’s going on? Is everything all right?”

  Lindy called out, “No! There’s something biting the hell out of my toe!”

  Alice approached Lindy. “Okay, hang on. Let me see if I can tell what it is. Hold still.”

  Lindy cried out, “Well, whatever it is, it won’t let go!”

  Alice reached down and grabbed Lindy’s foot. “Hang on, I think it’s a … hang on, try to hold still. I think I’ve got it.”

  Lindy screeched, “Oh my God! What is it?” She was starting to panic. Pain rushed up her leg and into her groin. “Get it off!”

  “It’s off.”

  Her foot burned. “What was it?” Her breath was ragged.

  Alice chuckled and tried to show Lindy what it was in the dark. All Lindy could see was something small dangling from Alice’s fingers. A little claw.

  Lindy sat up, “Jeez, what the hell?”

  “A little crab.” Alice tossed the freaked-out critter back into the water.

  Lindy tried to steady her breathing while rubbing her foot. Her pinky toe felt broken. Her calf ached.

  Alice said, “Can you stand up?”

  “I think so. Can you give me a hand?”

  Alice helped Lindy up, but Lindy could barely apply pressure to the foot. Lindy held onto Alice’s shoulder for support. “Thanks. I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t here.”

  Lindy tried to put her weight on her foot. It was touch and go for a moment, but as the pain subsided she was able to bear weight. “And what are you doing down here anyhow?”

  Alice helped Lindy walk. “I could ask the same.”

  They walked in silence for a few moments until Alice asked, “So, what are you doing down here?”

  “I couldn’t sleep. You?”

  “Yeah, couldn’t sleep.”

  They walked again in silence; then Lindy said, “I think the conversation at the bonfire was tough.”

  “Yes, very hard.”

  Lindy looked at Alice in the dark. “You doing all right? You wanna talk?”

  Alice sighed. “I feel so lost.”

  Lindy kept her arm around Alice’s shoulders. “I know, honey. I get it.”

  Alice stifled a sob.

  “It’s okay. Go ahead,” Lindy said. “It’s the reason I came down here just now. I needed a cry, and I didn’t want to wake anyone up in the compound. And then all my screaming. I’m surprised we don’t see flashlights bobbing on the path down here.”

  Alice started to laugh instead of cry.

  “What?” Lindy cocked her head and looked at Alice.

  Alice said, “You, jumping around.”

  “Wha … you’re laughing at—” Lindy started to chuckle because Alice’s laughter was so contagious.

  Alice could barely get the words out because she was laughing so hard. “I wish I could have videotaped you because …” she cackled and bent over, “it was just so dang unexpected and fuckin’ hysterical! I mean, here I am feeling like shit—” she cackled some more, “and then you come along and start screaming like a girl and hopping around and—” Alice fell onto the sand, holding her gut.

  Lindy plopped down next to her. “Oh, my Gawd. I must have looked like a complete spazz!”

  The two of them giggled into the quiet night, and after a while, they toned it down.

  Alice said, “Holy shit that was funny. I mean, not funny in that you were in pain, but if you could have seen what I saw while I was crying my eyes out.”

  Lindy caught her breath. “Well, didn’t Joni Mitchell sing something about laughing and crying was the same release?”

  “She did.”

  “Man, look at those stars.”

  Alice rolled onto her back. “Yeah. Sometimes I look for Cora in the stars, like maybe she’s up there hanging out, watching over me.”

  “She might just be.”

  Alice sighed. “Oh, what I wouldn’t give to see her right now.”

  Lindy sighed too. “I know.” She called out toward the sky, “Vera, where are you?”

  “Vera was your mom?”

  “Yeah.”

  Alice leaned up on one elbow, facing Lindy. She bent down and kissed Lindy on the lips.

  Lindy drew back, “Wait, whaa?”

  Alice put her fingers up to Lindy’s lips. “Shhh. Close those beautiful eyes and just go with it.”

  “But—”

  Alice silenced her with another kiss.

  TWELVE

  November 24, 1980

  Lorna sat at her desk in the office behind reception doing her bills when she heard the front door open. She listened for a moment, then stood up and entered the lobby. When she saw who stood at the threshold of the door, she froze.

  “Mother?” she gasped.

  “So, this is where you’ve been hiding?” With the sun behind her, Esther resembled a Rubenesque silhouette.

  Lorna couldn’t speak.

  “Well, aren’t you going to invite me in?” Her strong hefty voice rang out.

  Lorna shook herself out of her state. “Of course! Come in, mother, come in.” She moved forward and came around the desk. “How did you … why didn’t you call? I would have—"

  Esther strode into the lobby and looked around, waving Lorna off. “Isn’t this just quaint?” she remarked. She touched the furniture as she walked by, looking at the stereo, television console, and the front desk. “Look at this! How lovely!”

  “Mother, why didn’t you call? I would have picked you up at the airport, prepared the guest room.”

  Esther asked, “Who did this woodwork?”

  Lorna went up to her. “Mother!”

  “What? Oh.”

  Lorna went to hug her. “I’m just so shocked to see you.”

  Esther hugged her daughter with one arm and only for a moment. “Well, your brothers are busy for Thanksgiving. We are doing Christmas together, which I hope you’ll join us for, at the house. I’ve had several invitations from people, but I thought I would come down here and see if you wanted to have dinner with me.”

  Lorna thought about the Thanksgiving plans she had made with everyone. She was going to host a potluck at the motel since her tenants were not going to go home for the holiday. Lindy’s father was invited, due to arrive tomorrow.

  She said, “Well, of course you’re welcome here but I am hosting a potluck dinner …”

  Her mother looked at her, waiting for her to finish her sentence. “And?”

  “Where is your luggage? You’ll want to change out of that suit and into something more breezy. It’s unusually warm today.”

  Her mother’s suit—lightweight linen—looked as crisp as if she had just donned it. Lorna could never understand how her mother could pull things off like that after a long flight and drive.

  “In the trunk of the rental car.” Esther handed Lorna the keys to the car and surveyed the re
st of the lobby. “So very quaint.”

  Lorna ran out, grabbed her mother’s belongings, and zipped back into the lobby. “The guest room is upstairs. It’s small, though. Are you sure you don’t want me to book you a room on the mainland?”

  “Oh nooo! I’m fine, really.”

  “Well, I haven’t had the chance to dust up there. The last time someone was in it was months ago when Avril came down for a visit.”

  “Oh? How is the dear girl?”

  Lorna was still wondering how all this happened. Small talk was the last thing she could muster. She led her mother up the steep steps to the guest room.

  “Well, here you—”

  Esther exclaimed, “Pink! How delightful! Such a cute room, Lorna. A bit small, but I think I can manage.”

  Lorna pulled a portable luggage rack out of the hall closet and set her mother’s suitcase on it. “I know, that’s why I thought you’d be more comfortable at a motel on the—”

  “Babe?” A voice called from downstairs, “you in here, honey?”

  Lorna stood stock-still with her back to her mother. She could sense Esther’s eyebrows rise.

  “Um. Upstairs,” she called out weakly.

  “Honey, can you give me a hand with something. I’ve got grease all over the place, and I—”

  “I’ll be right down.” Lorna called out. She turned to face her mother but could not look her in the eye.

  Esther said quietly, “Go ahead. I’ll just unpack and freshen up a bit.”

  Lorna took in a very deep breath, nodded slightly, and bolted down the steps.

  When she saw Doreen, she ushered her quickly to the kitchen and then outside through the back door.

  “What the—,” Doreen said.

  “My mother just showed up!” Lorna hissed.

  “What? No fuckin’ way!” Doreen hissed back.

  They were outside behind the main building. Lorna paced. They kept their voices low.

  “Didn’t she call or anything?” Doreen watched Lorna make tracks in the hard-packed dirt and sand.