How NOT to Summon a Demon Lord: Volume 1

by Yukiya Murasaki

As a Sorcerer, it seemed like he wasn’t able to dish out enough damage to knock someone unconscious with just a normal attack.

  If he was going to come back at him with a flurry of consecutive attacks, then he would not have as many openings as before. It wouldn’t be possible for Diablo to win if he had to hold off using his magic for fear of damaging the building.

  —Could you back off already, man?

  Diablo let a sadistic smile creep across his face.

  “Heh heh heh... I won’t be able to hold back on the next one.”

  “Oh yeah? Well same here! I’m the Superhuman Warrior of the Adventurer’s Guild, Emile Bichelberger! For the sake of all oppressed women, I will take up my sword and fight until I die!”

  “...Emile.”

  Rem quietly called out to him.

  “Don’t worry, Rem! I’m going to set you free from this heinous Demon right now!”

  “...Please, just stop. Let me say this clearly: the reason I am wearing this collar is because of a failure of my own design.”

  “Huh? ...Wh-What...are you talking about?”

  “...I do not want to go into detail... But because Shera and I failed, we were the ones who received the collar that should have gone on our Summon instead.”

  Rem bit her lip.

  Shera’s cheeks were red, and looked like she was about to cry.

  —So, she said it...

  She had stepped in to make sure Diablo and Emile’s fight would not get any more intense.

  “...He has promised to help us remove these collars.”

  “Wh-What did you say!?”

  “...We don’t know how to take off the collars ourselves, and we have Miss Celestine helping us search for a way to remove them.”

  Emile’s voice was frail.

  “Was I, maybe...”

  “...Getting ahead of yourself, yes. Please put away your sword.”

  A chill ran throughout the room.

  After staying silent for awhile—Emile laughed.

  “Heh... Ha ha ha! Great! So there weren’t any girls being forced to wear collars, then!”

  —He wrapped everything up like it was the ending to some kind of touching story. What the hell.

  He was beaming an invigorated smile.

  “Hey, Demon! What’s your name?”

  “Diablo.”

  “My name is Emile Bichelberger! I’m an ally to all women, and an ally to those allied to women! So that means if you’re helping Rem and Shera to get those collars off, then I’m your ally too!”

  “That so.”

  “Sorry for trying to cut you down out of the blue like that! Anytime you need a Warrior’s power, feel free to ask the great Emile! That said, you weren’t so bad yourself!”

  “Heh...”

  Diablo let out a chuckle.

  —He wasn’t such a bad guy after all.

  Not only that, but unlike with Salamander, which Diablo had defeated with one shot, this guy was still raring to go. Looks like him being a level 50 Warrior wasn’t for nothing.

  Emile stepped out of the way of the staircase.

  “Sorry for getting in your way. You’re going to do your Adventurer registration, right? If you’re looking to be a Warrior, then I’ll rank you based off that last shot you got on me. Hmm... As a Warrior, I’d say you’re about level 40!”

  There were murmurs from the crowd around them. Looks like being rated a level 40 Warrior was pretty substantial.

  —Wait, are all these guys lower levels than that? This ain’t the first town of the game or anything, come on!

  Diablo shook his head.

  “I am a Sorcerer.”

  “What!? That’s really too bad... Well, that’s just how it goes, I guess. Diablo, come find me after you finish your first job as an Adventurer! I’ll treat you something to celebrate!”

  “Hmph, if I feel like it.”

  Emile seeing them off, Diablo and company started up the staircase to the second floor.

  Rem, who was right next to him, spoke out.

  “...Emile is not a bad person, and his abilities are certainly the real deal.”

  “But he’s pretty much a big idiot, right!” Shera chimed in.

  “...That is true.”

  He could tell exactly how Rem felt by the way she said that.

  They had run into a bit of trouble they weren’t expecting, but they were finally on their way to do their Adventurer’s registration.

  —He did say we’d celebrate once our first job was over. Let’s give it our best, then.

  Just like when he had started Cross Reverie for the first time, his excitement levels were shooting through the roof.

  †

  Climbing the wide and rickety wooden staircase, they arrived at the second floor. It was just like Diablo remembered in the game.

  The second floor was like a loft, and overlooked the bar on the first floor. Here, you could find the counter for the Adventurer’s Guild.

  It was his first time seeing it, but he was still overcome with a sense of nostalgia.

  The layout of the place was built kind of like what you would find at the bank or post office. Behind the wooden counter sat three girls who served as receptionists.

  If this was the same as the game, then starting in order from right to left, they would introduce Adventurers to 《Beginner’s Quests》, 《Advanced Quests》, and 《Story Quests》.

  The three girls all had the same face.

  If they hadn’t been wearing different colored clothes, then you would not be able to tell them apart. From right to left, it went blue, yellow, then red. It was just like a traffic light.

  Back in the game, they were made to be triplets as well.

  The girls were all Dwarves.

  Dwarf girls would always stay short, no matter how much they matured. However, unlike the childlike Grasswalkers, their chests were not held to the same restrictions. It was true what they said: “Big things come in small packages.”

  They also had dog ears, and the tails to match. The three girls’ ears drooped down, just like a Labrador’s.

  Diablo naturally came to stand in front of the receptionist in the yellow outfit.

  Rem tugged on his sleeves.

  “...That is the request counter for experienced Adventurers. Registration is done with the person in blue on the right.”

  “I see. That was just a force of habit.”

  Story quests weren’t added all that often, and it had been over two years since he had last taken on a Beginner quest.

  —Man, this takes me back. It’s been so long since I’ve talked with Bleu here.

  Players took to calling the receptionist on the right “Bleu.” Whenever someone finished all the Beginner quests, it was common for them to say, “I’ve graduated from Bleu!”

  Coming this far made it feel like the second coming of his game. He was starting to get pumped up.

  Diablo stood before the receptionist in blue clothing.

  In the game, these girls would not even move in the slightest until you came to talk to them.

  But in this world, they were actual, real, living beings.

  Bleu started to panic a little, and when she went to gather up the documents she had spread out on the desk, she ended up dropping them on the floor.

  “Awa, awawawawa...”

  “I’ve come to register as an Adventurer.”

  “Ah, Y-Y-Yesshir! Adventurer’s registration, yes! Welcome! I-I’ll do my best!”

  Rem came from the side to vouch for him.

  “...This person is an acquaintance of mine.”

  “Oh! You know him, Rem? I see... Well, that should be fine then! Phew... I was wondering what I was going to do if he was a scary person.”

  “...He is quite scary, though.”

  Rem scratched the girl’s ears with her fingertips. Her face started to flush red.

  Diablo cleared his throat.

  “Hurry it up.”

  In the game, this is the part where
you would enter your name, pick your gender and race, choose a job class, then adjust your initial stats. However, he had most of those things taken care of already.

  The game also had an event where they would tell you your level.

  It was a rite of passage for all players to be told, “Looks like you’re still level 1... B-But you should be able to get stronger right away!”

  Bleu started to explain while she picked up her documents.

  “Well, if I could get your name—”

  Shera stuck her face out from Diablo’s side.

  “Finally, our Adventurer registration! Hey, can I go first? Pleeease?”

  She looked positively over the moon about all this.

  Her eyes were practically sparkling.

  Besides his knowledge of the game, Diablo knew too little about this world. All he was sure of was that the higher his level, the better. Guess I’ll go after watching Shera first—he thought.

  He nodded.

  “I do not mind. Register yourself first.”

  “Yay!”

  Shera happily threw her hands in the air.

  Looking at her carefree smile just made him want to give up on his own selfish ways.

  This could be dangerous.

  —Was I always an accommodating kind of guy? Nah, can’t be.

  Diablo stood with Rem behind Shera, watching to see how the process worked.

  The receptionist for Beginner quests, also known as “Bleu,” pulled out a piece of paper from the pile of documents she had scattered earlier.

  “Well then, if you could please give me your name and the country you are from.”

  She brought out a quill pen and ink pot.

  Taking them, Shera started to write down some symbols.

  —Even though I can understand what everyone’s saying, looks like I can’t read anything.

  Diablo decided to himself that he would have Shera do his part of the paperwork for him, too.

  Shera talked out loud as she filled in the necessary information.

  “Okay! Let’s see... Shera L. Greenwood... Place of birth, the Kingdom of Greenwood...”

  The receptionist made a strange face.

  “...Miss Greenwood, from the Kingdom of Greenwood?”

  “Yup!”

  The worker tilted her head curiously.

  —Does Shera really have ties that powerful?

  Diablo and Rem reflexively exchanged glances.

  Bleu went to check over the documents.

  “Um, okay then... Yes, there don’t appear to be any problems here. Now I will measure your job class compatibility. If you have any particular class in mind that you would like to take, then please say so. If not, I will have you take all the tests for the Warrior, Archer, and Sorcerer classes.”

  “Summoner!”

  “All right, a Sorcerer it is then. After checking the specifics of the contract here, please give your signature and seal of blood in the bottom-right corner.”

  “You need a seal of blood!?”

  “Y-Yes. After all, it’s a contract stating you won’t sue the Adventurer’s Guild, even if you die...”

  Bleu placed a small knife on top of the counter.

  Diablo started to shake a little.

  Shera, on the other hand, picked up the knife like it was nothing.

  “Blood seals do kinda hurt, don’t they.”

  She then proceeded to lightly cut her thumb.

  After a bead of blood had formed from the wound, she pressed it against the bottom-right corner of the paper.

  Sticking her cut thumb in her mouth, Shera turned around to face Diablo and Rem.

  “All that’s left is the aptitude test! I’m definitely gonna get a higher level than you, Rem!”

  “...That would be impossible.”

  “Ah, fix the cut on my thumb! You must have a Summon that can do healing or something, right?”

  “...Just put some spit on it.”

  “Mean!”

  They made a small ruckus.

  —I get it now. I thought she never listened to other people because she wasn’t that bright... But maybe it was because of her upbringing?

  Bleu began to speak to Diablo.

  “U-Um... If you would like to, please go ahead and fill out the forms... I-If you are an acquaintance of Rem and Shera, taking the aptitude test at the same time should make things go faster, and, um... I-I’m sorry for saying something so forward!”

  “No, you haven’t said anything wrong.”

  Shera held out the pen to Diablo

  “All right, your turn next!”

  “Hmph, I am not partial to these kinds of trivial tasks. You do it.”

  “What, really!? Yay! That makes me kind of like your Summoner, then!”

  Rem was glaring at her, but didn’t start fighting over who would be Diablo’s secretary.

  Bleu pointed to the paper.

  “U-Um... The signature and blood seal can’t be done by a representative...”

  “I know.”

  —Though I really don’t like pain...

  If he was dead then he wouldn’t be able to sue them, so he wished they would make an exception for him there.

  Shera was quickly filling out the information on the new sheet of paper.

  “Name, Diablo... What’s your last name?”

  “I do not have such a thing. I am...an absolute and solitary existence. Do I need to have one?”

  “What do you think?”

  Bleu’s face turned into an expression of slight shock in response to Shera’s inquiry.

  “N-No! Well... Demons have their own fair share of hardships... U-Um, it’s all right to leave the country of origin blank as well!”

  It seemed like she was misunderstanding something. But it was a misunderstanding that worked out well for him, so he decided to just keep going like this.

  His preferred class: “Sorcerer,” of course.

  Shera moved away from the counter.

  “Now all that’s left is your signature and your blood seal!”

  “Hm.”

  Before he did so, he made Shera read him the terms of the contract.

  He wasn’t the kind of guy who would read every single detail of the Terms of Service when making an account or anything, but this was a world where things such as Enslavement Collars existed. He couldn’t be too careful.

  The terms were mostly things about how the Guild took no responsibilities for death or injuries, and for members to follow the laws and regulations of the country or town before the Guild’s. Even listed was how stealing would disqualify you as an Adventurer.

  —OK, doesn’t seem like anything unreasonable here.

  Satisfied, he took up the pen and signed his name.

  Since a signature was more of a symbol rather than something that used actual letters, he decided to write it out in cursive. Who would have thought his days of secretly practicing writing his character’s name would come in handy here!

  Rem and Shera both looked on with interest at the unfamiliar looking signature.

  “Now then...”

  Diablo took the knife that was laying on the counter.

  Doing this was just like getting a shot, and the more he hesitated, the more scared he was going to be. It’s not gonna hurt... It’s not gonna hurt... Even Shera made it look like it was nothing!

  Squeezing his eyes shut, he dragged the blade across his thumb.

  —It actually hurts a lot!!

  Red blood gushed from his fingertip.

  And I mean gushed.

  —I made the cut too deep!

  —Seems like when I go to hurt myself, the defense from my Curtain of Dark Clouds or magic barrier won’t activate.

  —But now’s not the time to just leisurely think over this kind of stuff!

  Blood was spilling onto the counter.

  Rem and the others looked on in horror, their pupils shrinking to the size of peas.

  It would be embarrassing to say he had cut himself
more than he wanted. While he kept an expression on his face like he had meant to do this, blood still dribbling from his thumb, he pressed it down on the paper across from his signature. It looked more like a bloodstain than a seal.

  There was still a stinging pain left over. However, his wound had already started to heal. The flow of blood was quickly stopping, and the deep cut he had made was closing itself up.

  —This must be from the HP regen effect of the Distorted Crown.

  Though it was in a place he never expected it to happen, he had managed to confirm another one of his equipment’s abilities.

  “Will this do?”

  Bleu’s face turned the same color as her uniform as she went to check Diablo’s registration form.

  “...Y-Yes, no problems here... Probably... U-Um, since everyone has chosen Sorcerer, I’ll take you over here for the aptitude test and determine your levels.”

  She guided Diablo and the others to a mirror off to the side of the counter, having them stand in front of it.

  It was a full-length mirror.

  —Was there even a mirror here back in the game?

  He couldn’t remember anymore. At the very least, nothing like this had happened in-game.

  The mirror was bordered with gold, giving it an ornate appearance.

  The surface of the mirror looked cloudy, as if it had not been polished. It did not reflect much of the their appearances.

  Shera blinked in surprise.

  “What’s this?”

  “...A mirror that measures the strength of your magic. This is how you use it.”

  Standing directly in front of it, Rem reached out and touched the mirror with her fingers.

  The surface of the mirror started to glow.

  The cloudiness of the glass started to clear, and Rem’s reflection was shown. It was only her upper half, but it was a distinct and vivid image.

  “...By sending a steady stream of magic into it, you change the clouded glass into that of a mirror.”

  Bleu gave Rem a small round of applause.

  “Just as you would expect from Rem! You are level 40 or above, without a doubt! It seems like your magic has gotten stronger from last time, too!”

  “...Thank you.”

  When Rem removed her hands, the cloudiness returned to the mirror.

  Shera raised both her hands.

  “Got it! Alllllrighty, I’m gonna do my best!”

  She pressed her hands against the mirror.

  While scrunching up her face, she made some grunting noises.