by Linda Ellen
“I ought to rip it off you – you think I don’t know he gave it to you?”
“So what if he did!” she sneered rashly.
“You think I don’t know about your ‘treasure box’ and all the junk you keep in there? That you take it out and drool over it every time I leave the apartment?” he snarled back. “Do you think I don’t know you’ve mooned over him all the time you’ve been married to me? I ain’t stupid!”
“So what if I do!” she erupted right back at him, bending her head and biting his hand, causing him to let go of the necklace with a shout of pain. “In my heart…in my heart I’m married to him! And I always will be!”
T.J. took his hands off the wheel and grabbed her arms to give her a good shaking, and she let out a piercing scream of terror as they nearly collided with a car going in the opposite direction, its panicked driver laying on the horn.
“That’s it! I’ve had it up to here with you!” he exploded once he got the car back in line, both of them quivering in reaction to the close call and the terrible argument. Louise wiped away tears and rubbed her bruised arms as he raised his hands to heaven and growled, “What was I thinking? Who could live with a shrew like you?”
Stung and shaken, Louise reached into the back where she had secured Tommy and hauled him forward over the seat, pressing him against her chest and pounding heart as he continued to scream and cry in fear and confusion.
Just up ahead, T.J. saw a cabbie waiting for a fare, and to his way of thinking, the timing couldn’t have been better. Making a quick decision, he hastily pulled over to the curb behind the cab.
Jumping out of the car, T.J. approached the driver and showed him a five-dollar bill. “Hey Mac, I’ll give you this five spot if you help me with the lady’s luggage and take her anywhere she wants to go, alright?” The man mumbled assent and climbed out, helping to transfer the items. In this way, T.J. made short work of ridding himself of Louise and the baby. Within a minute, he gunned the Phaeton’s motor and roared away.
Once again, Louise was left with a baby and nowhere to go.
In the back of the taxi, feeling déjà vu, she sat shaking with residual emotion and swiping at her tears with nervous fingers. The driver stared at her expectantly, waiting for instructions and wondering about the volatile couple’s story. Rummaging through her purse for a handkerchief, Louise came upon the note Irene had given to her on the bus weeks before.
Barely able to see through the torrent of tears, she opened it and read the hastily scrawled words:
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee, Psalms 56:3.
Irene Waller, 513 S. 6th, Apt 1
Deciding quickly, she handed the paper to the driver and sat back in the seat to rock her still trembling and crying son – hoping this time she would receive a sincere welcome when she arrived as an unexpected guest.
She was hanging on to the tiny bit of fringe at the end of her rope.
‡
CHAPTER 31
Pushing Away the Memories
Vic had settled in Evansville after he had finished his hitch in the CCC, staying for a while with his brother and sister-in-law until he had lucked into a good paying job driving a delivery van for Diamond Dry Cleaners, the largest dry cleaning service in town. Several months later, he had taken a room at Graham’s Rooms for Let, idly passing the days and weeks in a comfortable routine of work and relaxation.
Comfortable yes, albeit a tad lonely. He missed the camaraderie he’d had with the guys in the C’s – especially, of course, Floyd – and often wondered how his friend was getting along. He had tried writing several letters to the address Floyd had given him the day he boarded the bus for Alabama, but had never heard back. So, apart from an occasional date, or a night out shooting pool or maybe knocking down a few pins at the bowling alley with the guys he worked with at the plant, he spent most evenings whiling away the time listening to the radio in his room. He knew, however, that he needed to just move on with his life and try to find someone with whom he could share it.
One Friday night in May 1941, he found himself on a date at the Alhambra Theater with a lovely blue-eyed blonde by the name of Julie.
The small theater on Adams Avenue was packed with patrons giggling and erupting in guffaws over the antics of Bing Crosby, Bob Hope, and Dorothy Lamour, the popular trio in the movie Road to Singapore. Vic and his date had barely found seats near the back when they had arrived with mere minutes to spare before show time.
He reached over to grab another handful of popcorn from the bag she was holding, as yet another song began; this time a solo by Lamour.
Something about the actress, probably the dark eyes and dark hair, reminded Vic of Louise. Although Lamour’s singing voice was deeper, Vic wondered for a moment what the song would sound like if it were Louise singing…
Swearing under his breath, Vic impatiently upbraided himself as he realized his lost love had once again wormed her way into his thoughts. I’ll be glad when I’m finally free of her for good, he silently grumbled.
Just then, Vic’s date wrapped one hand around the generous bulk of his bicep and gave it a squeeze as she snuggled closer to him. He purposely turned his mind to concentrate on her and the film.
“I’m having such a good time,” Julie whispered near his ear. “I love the movie.”
“Yeah. It’s great,” he agreed, allowing his eyes to glide down from her neck to her chest, unable to help noticing the low-cut dress she had worn on their date. He had to admit, the girl was a looker, and she had made sure he knew she was keen on him. The pleasing fragrance of her perfume wafted up as she cuddled closer still. Crossing one leg over the other just then, she surreptitiously took his right hand and positioned it on her knee in a silent invitation for him to do whatever came to mind.
He thought about it. Julie was a good kisser and was known to be quite free with her favors. He had even come close to indulging on several of their dates, but something always stopped him. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on…it just didn’t seem right. Thinking of the occasional ribbing he took from the other fellows at work when the ‘guy talk’ turned risqué and he purposefully didn’t contribute, he gave a soft snort and short shake of his head. Maybe I should just take what she’s offerin’. A guy could do worse…
Once again, Dorothy Lamour’s image lit up the screen, and her dark beauty and sweet innocence immediately sidetracked his mind back to his long lost love. Louise, singing so beautifully as she lit up the stage… He unconsciously sighed in frustration. Why won’t she leave me alone? Silently he wondered why he felt so restless, and had been feeling like that for weeks, like some big, ominous unknown, unseen something was hanging over his head.
“Don’t you like the movie?” Julie asked, aware of her date’s obvious preoccupation and silently acknowledging the fact that when they were out together, Vic was often distracted and quiet. Many times he just stared into space, the quintessential ‘strong and silent type’.
Julie was a popular girl, and knew she was pretty – all the young men told her so. But she had set her sights on Vic Matthews from the moment he had first come to work, driving a truck for Diamond Dry Cleaners, where she was employed as one of the steam pressers. All the girls thought Vic was just the ‘bee’s knees’ and vied for his attention. Yet, it was Julie who had finagled a date with him by pretending to be stranded at work one day and had appealed to the gentleman in him to take her home in his car. That had led to them going on a date…several, in fact. So far though, she hadn’t been able to start his engines. Among themselves, the gals at Diamond’s figured he was carrying a torch for some girl who broke his heart. None of them, however, had had the nerve to come right out and ask him.
“Yeah, it’s fine,” he murmured, striving to focus on the action.
“We can go see something else if you want…” she offered.
“No, really, it’s fine…” he replied back, prompting their fellow moviegoers nearby to react with a chorus of,
“Ssshhh!”
Embarrassed, they glanced around before settling down again to finish watching the film. It truly was funny, and Vic enjoyed himself. Then, he was the perfect gentleman to Julie on the way to take her home. He opened doors for her, made sure he was on the outside nearest traffic as they walked to the car, and made polite conversation all along the way.
Evansville wasn’t a very large town, and it didn’t take all that long to traverse the darkened streets to her apartment. Julie didn’t want the night to be over, but she had a feeling this date would end like the others, chaste and sweet. This time, she decided to take the bull by the horns. When they reached her door, she turned, throwing herself into his arms. As guys would say, she ‘really laid one on him.’
Encouraged that he was participating in the kiss, when she finally pulled back, she murmured languidly, “My roommates are both away for the weekend…you want to come in for some coffee…or a sandwich?”
This threw Vic into a quandary. In the soft glow of her porch light, he gazed down at her, contemplating how truly gorgeous she was. He knew any red-blooded male with even a spark of fire still left in the furnace would jump at the chance to take her up on her offer. Oh yes, he knew what she was really offering – and it was a heck of a lot more than coffee and a sandwich. He opened his mouth to agree, but at the last second, he stopped and closed his lips again, unable to take that final step. I’m just…not ready. I’ll know when it’s the right time, he assured himself, inwardly resenting the ever-present ‘presence’ of the girl back in Louisville.
Smiling softly, he reached up, gently grasping Julie’s hands from either side of his head, and brought them down to cradle against his chest. “Not tonight, I’m…kinda tired. Been a long week,” he murmured. “Thanks, anyway.”
Searching his shadowed eyes for a long minute, weighing her options, Julie finally shrugged as she strove to hide her disappointment, and then whispered, “Sure.”
“Goodnight,” he mumbled with a relieved smile as he leaned in to give her one last, slow kiss before he turned to walk back to his car.
“She really hurt you…didn’t she,” Julie softly called to his back. He stopped, and then turned around slowly, meeting her eyes. His heart was suddenly thumping as if he had been caught with his hand in the till.
“Who?”
They stared at one another for a moment. Vic was uncomfortable, and felt as if he had suddenly been forced under the beam of a microscope.
“Whoever it was that ripped part of your heart out and left you bleeding.”
He visibly winced, her words coming too close to the truth. Swallowing, he answered just above a whisper, “I guess you could say that. But it was a long time ago.”
Julie took a step toward him, holding out her hand, palm up. “I’ve got bandages inside…and iodine…I’m a good nurse…I could fix what ails you, if you just give me a chance…”
Vic clamped his lips together in a pout, wishing it were that simple. If it were, he would have surgically removed Louise from his heart years before. In answer, he shook his head slowly from side to side.
“Thanks,” he mumbled. “But… if it’s okay…I’d like to have a rain check…”
She smiled gently, thinking he really was a sweetheart – and the girl that broke his heart must not have a brain in her head. “Sure Vic. The offer’ll always be open.”
Then, inclining his head with a tiny smile, he turned to make his way back to the car, wondering if he needed to have his head examined.
*
The next evening, Vic lay on his bed listening to a baseball game on the radio. The announcer’s rich baritone voice expertly described a line drive straight down center field, allowing his listeners to truly picture the players running at top speed around the bases. Vic shut his eyes for a moment as he ‘watched’ in his mind.
It was a warm evening, the kind that leant to being lazy. With one hand behind his head, and the other holding a cigarette to his lips, Vic took a long draw and then opened his mouth in the form of an O to allow the smoke to escape. Moderately pleased with his ‘skill’, he watched as lazy circles floated smoothly forward.
Just as he was wondering if his landlady had finished preparing supper for her boarders yet, a knock suddenly sounded at his door.
Turning his head, he blew the rest of the smoke from his mouth. “Yeah?” he called through the closed portal.
“Matthews, you have a long distance call downstairs,” the proprietor’s voice informed him through the wooden panel.
Long distance? Vic pondered, wondering who would be telephoning him, and hoping it didn’t spell some kind of trouble.
“Be right there,” he called, turning to snuff the cigarette out in the ashtray on the nightstand. Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, he located his shoes and quickly stamped into them. Then pulling the door shut behind him, he made his way down the steps to the foyer where the telephone was situated on a table. The landlady, Althea Graham – a middle-aged widow who reminded him of an older version of Liz, his sister-in-law – stood holding the receiver, her face wearing her customary ‘been sucking on a dill pickle’ expression.
“They called collect,” she announced without preamble, and without covering the mouthpiece. “I’m not running free long distance telephone service for my tenants…” she began, but he stopped her with a hand upraised. “I’ll pay, Ms. Graham.”
“Just see that you do,” she grumbled as she handed him the weighty black handset.
He waited for her to go on about her business, before he put the receiver up to his ear. “Hello?”
“Victor Matthews?” an operator’s nasally voice answered.
“Yeah, that’s me.”
“I have a collect call from a Mr. Alec Alder. Will you accept the charges?”
“Yeah sure. Alec?” Vic spoke a bit louder into the phone, unconsciously making up for the distance between he and his friend on the other end of the line.
“Hey old man, how you been?” Alec crooned, emitting his trademark snicker.
Vic smiled at hearing the friendly, familiar voice and eased himself down in the chair next to the table. “Aw, fair to middlin’. Can’t complain, you know. How ‘bout you?”
“Same.”
“Fleet okay? She popped that baby out yet?” Vic asked, figuring that was what the price of a phone call would be about.
“No, she’s got a few weeks to go, yet,” Alec informed, then laughed again, adding, “But she wishes it was out. Man, you should see her, she’s big as the backend of the Idlewild.”
Vic laughed. “Man, she hears you she’ll skin you alive, you better watch out.”
“Don’t I know it!”
The long time friends laughed together and then paused, causing Vic to suddenly get the feeling that there was something else…some other reason for Alec to call; something that couldn’t wait for the delay of a letter. His pulse started to speed up.
After another few moments, he heard Alec clear his throat. “Uh, Pal? I, uh…that is Fleet’s been badgering me to…what I mean is…aaaah,” Vic heard his friend swear under his breath and then come out with, “There’s somethin’ you might wanna know…”
Vic’s heart jumped like a racehorse and he knew the subject was about to turn to Louise. He swallowed and moistened suddenly dry lips, managing to croak out, “What’s that?”
“It’s Louise. She…well her and her old man split up and believe it or not, she’s staying with your friend Irene.”
Vic drew in a deep breath, his brow furrowing as he thought about this development. Irene? He hadn’t been aware that Miss Irene and Louise had ever actually met and he wondered what could have happened to orchestrate such an event. Clearing his throat, he murmured, “What brought this on?”
“I don’t know for sure, man, but…that guy Lou’s married to…word has it that he stepped out on her, and even bought some other dame a diamond ring with a stone big enough to choke a horse, and mink to boot. Fleet said L
ou told her the jerk kicked her out of the car down on Main – with her little boy in her arms – and she had to take a cab.” Swearing again, he added, “Always knew that joker was a no-good son of a…”
“Kicked her outta the car? Is she all right? And the baby?” Vic interrupted, instantly sitting forward on the chair and picturing the worst, that the guy opened the door and booted her out.
“Yeah, they’re fine. But she’s sayin’…she’s not goin’ back to him anymore…”
Vic lapsed into silence, realizing what Alec was saying. Louise was planning on getting a divorce…she would be free… However, he knew that she and her husband had broken up before and gotten back together again. Through Fleet and Alec, he had kept tabs on her over the months and years. Now, the wheels of his mind were spinning a hundred miles an hour.
Is this for real? Does this mean… Could it mean… Would she want to see me? Remembering the heavy feeling he had been experiencing of late, a cold chill passed through him as he realized he must have been tapping into her emotions over the last few weeks. The thought made him shake his head in awe. How is that possible?
“You there, Chief?” Alec murmured, knowing this information had probably just twisted his best friend up in knots.
“Yeah…I, uh…” he paused again, tossing ideas around in his head. Finally he asked, “Ya think you could put up with a border for a few days?”
“I figured you’d say that,” Alec answered. “Couch is plenty big. Comfy, too. I oughta know, slept on it more than a few nights when Fleet kicked me outta the bed,” he added with a chuckle.
Vic nodded, his mind made up. “See ya in a few days…soon as I can make arrangements.”
“Okay, man.”
“And Alec…don’t tell her I’m comin’… I mean…you know…just in case…”
“Gotcha. And hey…if we ain’t home when you get here, the key’s under the mat.”
