baked him wid a lil stuffin an' such, so he'd keep.
MAYOR CLARKE
Didn't you know my wife knowed how to cook? Go fetch dat turkey here,
and don't let no dead lice fall off of you on de way.
LUM
(extremely embarrassed) I don't speck he's dere now, Mist' Clarke.
CLARKE
(ferociously) How come?
LUM
I passed by dere on Sunday and et a lil piece of shoulder offa him,
an' being everybody else was eatin' turkey too, I et some breast meat
an' uh mouf ful or two of stuffin' an' uh drum stick wid de ham part
of de leg hung on to it wid a lil gravy. (general laughter) I thought
I was doin' right cause [Note: corrected missing space] de turkey was
kilt for Daisy anyhow. So I jus' took it on to her. Dave was all hurt
up and Jim was locked up so--
CLARKE
Dat'll do! Dat'll do! Dry up, Suh! (turns to Dave) Stand up, Dave.
Since youse de one got hurted, you be de first witness and tell me
just whut went on out dere.
(Dave rises slowly.)
SISTER TAYLOR
Dat's right, Dave. Git up dere and lie lak de cross ties from New York
to Texas. You greasy rascal you! You better go wash yo'self before you
go testifying on people.
DAVE
I'm just as clean as you.
REV. SINGLETARY
(jumping to his feet) Wait a minute! Taint none of y'all got no call
to be throwin' off on dis boy. He come here to git justice, not to be
slurred and low-rated. He ain't 'ssaulted nobody. He ain't stole no
turkeys _nor_ chickens. He's a clean boy. He set at my feet in Sunday
school since he was so high, (measures knee height) and he come thru
religion under de sound of my voice an' I baptized him and I know he's
clean.
SISTER TAYLOR
It'll take more'n uh baptizin' to clean dat nigger.
DAVE
I goes in swimmin' nearly every day. I'm just as clean as anybody
else.
SISTER TAYLOR
(Mayor begins rapping for order. She shouts out) Swimmin! Dat ain't
gointer clean de crust offa _you_. You ain't had a good bath since de
devil was a hatchet. If you ain't been parboiled in de wash pot and
scoured wid Red Seal lye, don't bring de mess up.
CLARKE
I'm goin' to have order here or else! Gwan, Dave.
DAVE
It's just lak I tole you Sat'day night.
CLARKE
Yeah, but dat wuz at de store. Dis is in [Note: corrected missing
space] court and it's got to be tole agin.
ELDER SIMMS
Just uh minute, Brother Clarke, before we any further go I wants to
ast de witness uh question dat oughter be answered before he open his
mouf.
MAYOR CLARKE
Whut _kind_ of a question is dat?
SIMMS
Dave, tell de truth. Ain't yo' heart full of envy and malce 'gainst
dis chile? (Gestures towards Jim. Dave shakes his head and starts to
deny the charge but Simms hurries on.) Wait a minute now! Wait till I
git thru. Didn't y'all used to run around everywhere playin' and
singing andeverything till you got so full of envy and malce and
devilment till y'al broke up? Now, Brother Mayor, make him tell de
truth.
DAVE
Yeah, I useter be crazy bout Jim, and we was buddies till he tried to
back bite me wie, wid my girl.
JIM
Never _was_ yo girl. Nohow I ain't none of yo' buddy. I ain't got no
buddy. They kilt my buddy tryin' to raise me. But I did useter lak you
till you acted so low down tryin' to undermine me and root me out wid
my girl.
MAYOR
Aw, table dat business an' less open up new business. We ain't here to
find out whose girl it is. We wants to know 'bout dis fight and who
hit de first lick and how come. Go head on Dave and talk.
DAVE
Well, jus lak I tole yuh, Sat'day night, I been watchin' dat flock uh
wild turkeys ever since way last summer roostin' in de edge of dat
cypress swamp out by Howell Creek, where Brazzle's ole mule was
dragged out. It was a great, bit ole gobbler leadin' de flock. So last
time I seen him I said I was gointer git him for my girl if it taken
me uh year. So Sat'day, kinda late, I grabs ole Hannah, my gun, I
calls her Old Hannah, and come to de store to buy some shells. Y'all
know whut went on at de store. Well, it made me feel lak I wuz
gointergit dat ole gobbler if I had to follow him clean to Diddy war
Diddy or slap into Ginny-Gall. But I didn't have to do nothin'. When I
got out by de ole mule bones, I seen 'em flyin' round lak buzzards. So
I loaded both barrels, squatted down on uh log where I had dead aim on
dat big ole cypress pine where they roosts at. Sho nuff, soon's de sun
had done set, here dey come followin' de leader'. He lit way out on de
end of de limb kinda off from de rest and I eased ole Hannah up on
him. Man! I got so skeered I wuz gointer miss him till I got de all
overs. He gobbled two three times to see if all his fambly was safed
den he settled down and bam! I let him have it! He spread his wings
lak he wuz gointer fly on off an' I _cried_ lak a chile! But I got him
alright and down he come floppin, and me grabbin him before he quit
kickin. Gee, I was proud. He felt lak he weighed forty pounds. Whilst
I was kinda heftin him in my hands I heard uh rifle fire and I looked
and dere was Jim firin into de turkey flock dat was flyin round
skeered. He didn't hit a God's thing, but he seen me wid my gobbler
and come runnin up talking bout give him his turkey. I ast him "who
turkey you talkin bout?[Note: missing double quote?] He says dat one
of hisn I hed done grabbed. I tole him he must gone crazy in de head.
He says, I better give him his turkey before he beat my head off. I
tole him I wasn't gointer give nobody but Daisy Blunt dat turkey.
Otherwise, if he wanted to try my head, I wasn't runnin uh damn step.
Come on. So he jumped on me and tried to snatch de turkey. We fit all
over de place. First we was just tusslin for de bird, but when he
found out he couldn't take it he hit me wid his fist. Den I ups wid my
African soup bone and I bet I plowed up uh acre uh bushes wid his
head. He hit ker-bam! right in dat pack uh mule bones and I turnt and
started off, when lo and behold, he gits up wid dat hock bone and lams
me in de head and when I come to, him and my turkey was gone. So I
come swore out uh warrant aginst him cause didn't fight fair. I ain't
mad. I always lakted Jim, but he sho done dirty--lammin me wid uh mule
bone and takin' [Note: corrected missing space] my turkey.
(Dave resumes his seat and Jim drops his head for a moment, then
snatches it up arrogantly and glares at the Baptists. The whole place
is very silent for a moment. Then Mayor Clarke clears his throat, raps
with his gavel and looks sternly at Jim.)
CLARKE
Jim Weston, stand up suh! (Jim rises sullenly.) Youse charged wid
'saulting Dave Carter wid uh dangerous weapon and then stealin his
lawful turkey gobbler. You heard de charge--guilty or not guilty?
JIM
(arrogantly) Yeah, I hit him and I'll hit him agin if he crowd me. But
I ain't guilty uh no crime. (He hitches up his pants and sits down
arrogantly.)
CLARKE
(surprised) Whuts dat you say, Jim? (raps sharply) Git up from there
sir! Whuts dat you say?
JIM
(rising) I say, heah, I lammed ole Dave wid de mule bone, but I ain't
guilty uh nothin.
(There is a stark silence for a few seconds. Then Clarke raps
nervously.)
CLARKE
How come you ain't guilty?
(Jim sits down amid jubilant smiles of Methodists. Simms chuckles out
loud and wipes his face with his handkerchief. He gets to his feet
still gloating.)
SIMMS
(to Jim) Set down, Jim, and lemme show dese people dat walks in de
darkness wid sinners an' republicans de light.
SINGLETARY
You just as well tuh hush up befo' you start, then, Simms. You can't
show nobody uh light when you ain't got none tuh show.
HAMBO
Ain't dat de gospel?
NIXON
Aw, let de man talk. Y'all sound lak uh tree full uh blackbirds. Go
head on, Elder Simms.
WALTER
Yeah, you can't teach 'em nothin' but talk on. We know whut you
talkin' about.
CLARKE
(raps once or twice) I God, tell it. Whut ever tis you got tuh tell.
SISTER LEWIS
An yeah, hurry up and tell it. I know it ain't goin' tuh be nothin'
after you git it told but hurry up and say it so yo' egg-bag kin rest
easy.
WALTER
Aw shut up an' give de man uh chance.
SISTER LEWIS
My shetters ain't workin' good. Sposin' you come shet me up, Walter.
Den you'll know it's done right.
LIGE
Aw, whyn't y'all ack lak folks an' leave de man talk.
CLARKE
(rapping repeatedly) Order in dis court, I God, jus' like you was in
Orlando! (Silence falls.) Now, Simms, talk yo' chat.
SIMMS
(glances down into his open Bible then looks all around the room with
great deliberation. It is evident he enjoys being the center of
attraction. He smiles smugly as he turns his face towards the pulpit.
He speaks slowly and accents his words so that none will be lost on
his audience.) De Bible says, be sho' you're right, then go ahead. (He
looks all around to collect the admiration he feels he has earned.)
Now, we all done gethered and 'sembled here tuh law dis young lad of
uh boy on uh might serious charge. Uh whole passle of us is rarin tuh
drive him way from home lak you done done off his daddy an' his
brothers.
HAMBO
We never drove off his pappy. De white folks took an' hung him for
killin' dat man [Note: corrected missing space?] in Kissimmee for
nothin'.
SIMMS
Dat ain't de point, brother Hambo.
HAMBO
It's jes' as good uh point as any. If you gointer talk--tell de truth.
An if you can't tell de truth, set down an' leave Rev. Singletary
talk.
SIMMS
Brother Mayor, how come you let dese people run they mouf
lak uh passle uh cow-bells? Ain't I got de floor? I ain't no
breath-and-britches. I was _people_ in Middle Georgy befo' I ever come
to Floridy. Whut kind of Chairman is you, nohow?
CLARKE
(angrily) Heah! Heah! Don't you come tryin' show yo'self round me! I
God, I don't keer whut you wuz in Georgy. I God, I kin eat fried
chicken when you [Note: corrected missing spaces] caint git rain water
tuh drink. Hurry up an' say dat mess you got in yo' craw an' set down.
We needs yo' space more than we needs yo' comp'ny.
NIXON
Don't let him skeer you, Elder Sims. You got plenty shoulders tuh back
yo' fallin.
HAMBO
Well, each an' every shoulder kin hit de ground an' I'll git wid 'em.
Don't like it dontcher take, here my collar come an' shake it.
WALTER
Hambo, everybody in Orange County knows you love tuh fight. But dis is
uh law hearin'--not no wrassle.
HAMBO
Oh you Methdis' niggers wants tuh fight bad enough, but youse skeered.
Youse jus' as hot as Tucker when de mule kicked his mammy. But you
know you got plenty coolers.
SISTER TAYLOR
Aw, taint nobody skeered uh you half-pint Baptists. God knows Ahm
ready an' willin'. (She glares at Mrs. Lewis.)
(Sister Lewis jumps to her feet but is pulled back into her seat.
Mayor Clarke raps for order and the room gets quiet.)
CLARKE
Aw right now, Simms. I God, git through.
SIMMS
(pompously) Now, y'all done up an' took dis po' boy an' had him locked
up in uh barn ever since Sat'day night an' done got him 'coused uh
assault an' stealing uh turkey an' I don't know whut all an' you ain't
got no business wid yo' hands on him stell. He ain't done no crime,
an' if y'all knowed anything 'bout law, I wouldn't have tuh tell you so.
CLARKE
I God, he is done uh crime and he's gointer ketch it, too.
SIMMS
But not by law, Brother Mayor. You tryin' tuh lay uh hearin' on dis
boy an' you can't do it cause he ain't broke no law--I don't keer whut
he done so long as he don't break no law you can't tetch him.
SINGLETARY
He committed assault, didn't he? Dat sho is breakin' de law.
SIMMS
Naw, he ain't committed no 'sault. He jus' lammed Dave over de head
an' took his own turkey an' come on home, dat's all. (triumphantly)
Yuh see y'll don't knoww whut you talkin' 'bout. Now, I done set in de
court house an' heard de white folks law from mornin' till night. (He
flips his Bible shut.) I done read dis book from lid tuh lid an' I
knows de law. You got tuh have uh weepon tuh commit uh 'sault. An'
taint in no white folks law an taint in dis Bible dat no mule bone is
no weapon. I
CLARKE
(after a moment of dead silence) I God, whut's dat you say?
SIMMS
(sitting down and crossing his legs and folding his hands upon his
Bible) You heard me. I say you ain't got no case 'ginst dis boy an'
you got tuh turn him go.
SINGLETARY
(jumping up) Brother Chairman--
CLARKE
(raps once and nods recognition) You got de floor.
SINGLETARY
I ain't book-learnt an' I ain't rubbed de hair offen my head agin no
college wall, but I know when uh 'sault been committed. I says Jim
Weston did 'sault Davie. (He points at Dave's head.) An' steal his
turkey. Everybody knows Jim can't hunt wid Dave. An' he 'saulted Dave
too.
SIMMS
(arrogantly) Prove it!
(Singletary stands there silent and puzzled. The Methodist side breaks
into a triumphant shout of "Oh Mary, don't you weep, don't you moan,
Pharaoh's army got drownded." Singletary sinks into his seat. When
they have shouted out three choruses, Simms arises to speak.)
I move dat we sing doxology and bring dis meetin' to uh close. We'se
all workin' people, Brother Mayor. Dismiss us so we kin gwan back to
our work. De sun is two hours high yet. (looks towards the Methodist
side) I move dat we adjourn.
WALTER
I second de motion.
SINGLETARY
(arising slowly) Hold on there uh minute wid dat motion. Dis ain't no
lodge meetin'. Dis is uh court an' bofe sides got uh right tuh talk.
(motions towards Simms' Bible) Youse uh letter learnt man but I kin
read dat Bible some too. Lemme take it uh minute.
SIMMS
I ain't gointer do it. Any preacher dat amounts to uh hill uh beans
would have his own Bible.
CLARKE
I God, Singletary, you right here in yo' own church. Come on up here
an' read out yo' pulpit Bible. I God, don't mind me being up here.
Come on up.
(A great buzzing breaks out all over the church as Singletary mounts
the pulpit. Clarke raps for order. Simms begins to turn the leaves of
the Bible.)
SIMMS
Brother Mayor, you oughter let us outa here. You ain't got no case
'ginst dis boy. Don't waste our time for nothin'. Leave us go home.
CLARKE
Aw, dry up, Simms. You done talked yo' talk. I God, leave Singletary
talk his. (to Singletary) Step on out when you ready, Rev.
REV. SINGLETARY
(Reading) It says here in Judges 18:18 dat Samson slewed three
thousand [Note: corrected missing space] Philistines wid de jawbone of
an ass.
SIMMS
(on his feet) Yeah, but dis wasn't no ass. Dis was uh mule, Brother
Mayor. Dismiss dis meetin' and less all go home.
SINGLETARY
Yeah, but he was half-ass. A ass is uh mule's daddy and he's biggern
uh ass, too. (emphatic gestures) Everybody knows dat--even de lil
chillun.
SIMMS
(standing) Yeah, but we didn't come here to talk about no asses,
neither no half asses, nor no mule daddies. (laughter from de
Methodists) We come to law uh boy for 'sault an' larceny.
SINGLETARY
(very patiently) We'se comin' to dat pint now. Dat's de second claw uh
de sentence wese expoundin'. I say Jim Weston did have uh weepon in
his hand when he 'saulted Dave. Cause y'all knows if de daddy is
dangerous, den de son is dangerous too. An' y'all knows dat de further
back you gits on uh mule de more dangerous he gits an' if de jawbone
slewed three thousand people, by de time you gits back tuh his hocks,
its pizen enough tuh kill ten thousand. Taint no gun in de world ever
kilt dat many mens. Taint no knives nor no razors ever kilt no three
thousand people. Now, folkses, I ast y'all whut kin be mo' dangarous
dan uh mule bone? (to Clarke) Brother Mayor, Jim didn't jes' lam Dave
an walk off. (very emphatic) He 'saulted him wid de deadliest weepon
there is in de world an' while he was layin' unconscious, he stole his
turkey an' went. Brother Mayor, he's uh criminal an' oughter be run
outa dis peaceful town.
(Great chorus of approval from Baptist Clarke begins to rap for
order.)
SIMMS
(attending) Brother Mayor, I object. I have studied jury and I know
what I'm talkin' about.
CLARKE
Aw dry up, Simms. Youse entirely out of order. You may be slick, but
you kin stand another greasing. Rev. Singletary is right. I God, I
knows de law when I hear it. Stand up dere, Jim.
(Jim rises very slowly. Simms rises also.)
CLARKE
Set down, Simms. I God, I know where to find you when I want you.
(Simms sits.) Jim, I find you guilty as charged an' I wants you to git
outa my town and stay gone for two years. (to Lum) Brother Marshall,
you see dat he gits outa town befo' dark. An' you folks dats so
anxious to fight, git on off dis church grounds befo' you start. And
don't use no knives and no guns and no mule bones. Court's dismissed.
_CURTAIN_
ACT III
Scene I
SETTING: Curtain goes up on a stretch of railroad track with a
luxurious Florida forest on the backdrop. Entrances left and right. It
is near sundown.
ACTION: When the curtain goes up there is no one on the stage, but
there is a tremendous noise and hub-bub off stage right. There are
yells of derision, shouts of anger. Part of the mob is trying to keep
Jim in town and a part is driving him off. After a full minute of
this, Jim enters with his guitar hanging around his neck and his coat
De Turkey and De Law Page 6
