Lessons in Love

by Kathryn R. Blake

  She leaned forward. "So, what can I do to reassure you?"

  With a shake of his head, he laughed and bent over to kiss her cheek just as Krista walked back into the room.

  "I've got your car…. Oh."

  "It's okay, Krista. The door's open. You may come in. Join us in the repast Pam ordered so I can stop existing on coffee fumes."

  Krista glanced inquiringly at Pam, who motioned toward the food. "I requested plenty, so help yourself."

  "Um, this is here for you, too, kitten. So, get up off your duff and start filling a plate."

  Pam suspected he would insist, and though her stomach was currently in knots, she got up and made a brave show of selecting some fruit and yogurt.

  Rob pulled out a chair for her at the table and motioned for Krista to take a seat as well. He'd made himself a roast beef sandwich, which Pam took to mean he doubted he’d get much chance to eat later, so he'd grab lunch while he could.

  "I reserved a rental car for you at O'Hare, sir. The same agency you normally use."

  "Thank you. As I was saying to Pam, Hemley's timing couldn't be more inconvenient. I wouldn’t be leaving if it wasn’t absolutely necessary."

  "We'll hold the office down for you, boss. You don't need to be concerned."

  He met Krista's gaze. "That's not what I'm concerned about."

  With a nod, she concentrated on the bowl of granola she chose.

  "I'm going to need your help, Krista."

  "Sure. I'll do everything I can."

  "I can help, too," Pam joined in, though she suspected they were obliquely referring to her. She wasn't a basket case. Okay, maybe she had been of late, but she was much more stable now.

  Rob squeezed her fingers. "I'll expect you to do your part. I'm going to leave a list of things I want you to get done while I'm gone."

  "No problem," she replied with a smile. "That's what I'm here for."

  "Good. Krista, could you make Pam an appointment at the Ladies First spa this afternoon?"

  "Wait! How is that helping you? Can't the Beautify Pam project be put on hold until you return?"

  "If you're uncomfortable about it, yes, we can postpone scheduling anything."

  "I'm not uncomfortable, it's just with you gone there'll be things we'll need to do in your stead, and I don't think a salon visit should reside at the top of the list."

  He regarded her silently.

  "All right. Perhaps I am a bit uncomfortable, but primarily because I think the entire project is a waste of time."

  One eyebrow rose. Yup, she was telling the CEO of Peterson Enterprises that his plan was irresponsible. Nice work, Weston.

  "I'd prefer to wait," she finished, hoping that would be the end of the discussion.

  "Fine. We'll wait. I have two other companies I'd like you to profile for me. However, I don’t want to pull you away if you think they’re a waste of time. Your time is clearly valuable, and I wouldn't want to inconvenience you with things I might consider important."

  Suppressing an urge to slam her head down, she sneaked him a look. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply your requests were unimportant. Of course, I'll work up any files you want."

  He nodded and returned his attention to Krista. "I expect things will turn a little dicey while I'm gone, so I need you to keep an eye out for extended bathroom breaks, missed lunches, and working after hours."

  Pam slammed her palm down on the table. "I'm not a child in need of constant monitoring. I'm fine."

  Though he didn't glance her way, Rob squeezed her fingers again. "Be cognizant of any unfavorable reactions, Krista, and report any unusual outbursts or work habits by texting me immediately."

  Pam shot to her feet, but Rob pulled her back down, this time on his lap. "Was I speaking to you?" he asked quietly.

  "No. Only about me as if I wasn't sitting right beside you. I don't want—"

  "I know what you don't want, kitten, and I also know what you need. Unfortunately, I won't be here to provide it."

  Her anger deflated, she asked, "How long will you be gone?"

  "A day. Two at the most, I'd say. Just do what I'd insist you do if I were here, and you'll be fine. I want you to take care of yourself, and I'm afraid you'll get too engrossed in your job to take the breaks I think you should."

  "It wouldn't kill me to do a little work," she groused.

  "No. But it will trigger the perfectionist in you, which in turn will goad your inner critic into action and before you realize it, you're caught in a panic loop with no exit."

  "I've been working here for six months, sir. I didn't start having panic attacks until you…."

  "Until I what?"

  She shook her head, realizing her first attack came as a result of him asking her to complete an assignment, which he later refused to let her finish. He was right. She would do anything he asked of her, even if it killed her, and that's what he didn't want. "Look, perhaps I'm not cut out for this job. Maybe you should find—"

  "Don't say it, Pam. You are my admin. You are the person I want. I don't have any doubt you can complete any project I give you. That's not where my concern lies. Do you understand?"

  She did, but she declined to admit it, because admitting it made her feel like an even worse failure. "No. No, I don't. Why should you be afraid of me doing what you hired me to do?"

  "I'm not. But I hired you for different reasons than the ones you assume I did."

  "Yeah. Fix the broken head case."

  A warning smack fell on her hip, hard enough to make her wince.

  Zero tolerance for put-downs. At least he didn't turn her over his knee and spank her in front of Krista, but if Pam continued to push him, he might. Not that she minded Krista knowing their relationship had moved a few more rungs up the ladder, but she didn't want him stripping off her skirt and panties before her new friend, either. Slippery slope.

  Gazing at him, Pam softly said, "Ow."

  Krista lurched to her feet. "I should go. I have things at my desk I need to finish up. Thanks for the breakfast, Pam." She turned and rushed out the door, shutting it as she left.

  "I’ll go see what’s bothering her," Pam suggested.

  "No. I'm the one she’s upset with. I'll speak with her later."

  Pam began to realize not all of Rob's concerns were of her making. He knew she admired Krista and took her friend’s advice seriously. If Krista showed disapproval of what she and Rob were doing, Pam would struggle with guilt, which was the opposite of what Rob wanted.

  "What if I assured her that—"

  Rob framed her face with his hands and kissed her. "Don't worry. Krista will be fine. I'll talk to her. You're my concern."

  "I know. I'll try not to let you down."

  He pressed his forehead to hers. "Sweetie, I'm not worried about you letting me down, I'm worried I will let you down. I'll call you as often as I can."

  Pam shook her head. "No. You don’t need to do that. I'll be hunky-dory."

  "I’m sure you will. That's not why I'm calling. This is a two-way street we're on, Pam. You may think I'm keeping a tight hold on the reins in order to check your behavior, but that's not it. Or that's not all of it. I'm keeping tabs because I want to hear your voice to be sure you're okay. I need the reassurance that I'm not doing us more harm by being away at this critical juncture. Yesterday was difficult for you. Don't deny it. I know it was. I even understood why you ran. But if I'm thousands of miles away, I can't catch you, and that worries me."

  "I won't run."

  He kissed her hard. "I'm holding you to that promise, young lady. And, thank you for insisting I take care of myself by eating something. You're good for me, too."

  Smiling, she wrapped her arms about his neck. "I'll miss you."

  He returned the hug and pushed her off his lap, keeping hold of her waist until she stood evenly on her own feet. Pam would have felt a little rejected if she hadn't noticed how tightly his jaw was set and the grimness in his eyes. This definitely was a two-way street fo
r them.

  "My flight leaves in four hours. I’ve got to wrap up things here, go home, pack, and be at the airport at least an hour before it departs."

  "What can I do to help?"

  "Finish your breakfast then take a look at the notes I left and let me know if you have any questions."

  "Can I take my yogurt out to my desk?"

  "Will you eat it there?"

  "Yes, sir."

  "Then you may. I'll check in with you before I leave."

  With a nod, Pam took her plate and carton back to her cubicle and was about to sit down when she realized Krista wasn't at her desk. Worried, she went searching for her.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Pam found Krista crying in the ladies' room.

  Stepping forward to wrap her arm around her friend’s shoulders, she asked, "What's wrong?"

  Krista smiled as she wiped her eyes. "Nothing. It's silly. I'm fine."

  "No, you're not. Let's go downstairs, or I can book a conference room for us to talk in."

  "It's not necessary. I just don't want to see you hurt."

  "He's not hurting me, Krista. In fact, he's taking better care of me than I ever could myself. I love that he worries about my welfare and wants me to be happy and safe."

  "Have you slept together, yet?"

  Pam inhaled sharply. "No. It's not like that. I mean, yeah, we've kissed a few times, but he hasn't shown the slightest indication he wishes to sleep with me." Not exactly true, but he wasn't beating down her door to get into her bed, either.

  Krista choked. "Are you blind, girl? What must he do to express his interest? Post a sign?"

  Pam blushed. "I think you misread him."

  Krista shook her head. "Nope. Been there, seen it before. He wants you, and not only as his executive admin. And, you've only been working for him, what for three days? That's fast, even for him."

  Pam closed her eyes. Krista meant well, but reminding her how quickly their relationship had blossomed, and that he'd done this many times before was not helpful. "So, what are you worried about? He'll toss me over for a new model?"

  "Yeah. I am. I'm worried he'll—"

  A knock at the door interrupted them. "Krista? I would like to speak with you, please."

  Krista rolled her eyes. "Now, I'm going to get the lecture. I don't know how you put up with his patronizing tone. I'd tell him to go stuff himself."

  Pam laughed. "I think you did that once already. Didn't change much, though, did it?"

  Krista shrugged. "Maybe. It eventually brought you into the fold. I'd better go. His patience seems to be in short supply today."

  "He's concerned about me."

  "Yeah. I sorta figured that one out for myself. Coming," she called out then added, for Pam's ears only. "Thanks. I'm okay. I'll catch you later, and we can chat."

  With a final brush to her hair, Krista strode out of the bathroom.

  "Go to my office. I'll be there shortly." Another knock at the door. "Pam? Are you all right?"

  "Yes. I'm fine."

  "Can you step out here for a moment, please?"

  She opened the door and stared at him. "I'm fine."

  After regarding her intently, he gave a single nod. "Just checking."

  She laughed. "Yeah. I got that."

  Then he bent forward to give her another kiss. "Brat."

  "Bully."

  Smiling, he turned and headed toward his office.

  When Pam returned to her desk, she found the two composition-style journals Rob wanted her to keep. The first one had a column header on the first page that said broken rule, date, time, reason. Self-explanatory. Bad little girls need to write down what they did wrong and why, so a proper punishment could be administered. The second notebook had a note. Use the first half of this journal to track everything you eat, and employ the calorie book to calculate your intake. I want you to consume 2,000 calories a day with a minimum of 1,750. Go below, and we talk. The other section can be used to jot down things you would like to say to me, but can't. Your thoughts, impressions, whatever you want. This part is for you. If you want to share it with me, fine. If you don't, that's okay, too.

  Pam flipped midway through the lined book and wrote, Thought for the day. Keeping a diary is a stupid idea and a waste of time. P. Weston. She closed the journal and put it in her top drawer.

  "So, did you add up your calories for today, yet?" a familiar male voice inquired from behind her.

  Giving a little jump of surprise, she turned back to glare at him in an attempt to mask her guilt. "No, sir."

  His smile didn't falter as he leaned an elbow against her low cubicle wall. "Get to it then. You still didn’t eat your yogurt, and the two slices of fruit you nibbled on earlier won't count for much. I expect to see your tally before I leave."

  "Understood. I'll get right on it, sir. Out of curiosity. Is there any actual work you'd like me to do, Mr. Peterson?"

  "I get the sense you aren't pleased with me, Miss Weston. Care to tell me why?"

  "No, sir. But I'll be sure to write my reasons down in the journal I’m supposed to keep."

  His lips twitched as he glanced at his watch. "I need to leave in about a half-hour, which gives me just enough time to see if I can improve your attitude a notch. Step into my office, please."

  Pam groaned. "No. That's not necessary. I—"

  "I disagree, Miss Weston. It is very necessary. Now, please."

  Certain she knew what would happen, Pam strode into his office with a grimace. He followed her in and shut the door.

  "Take a seat, please."

  She sat in one of the chairs in front of his desk and crossed her arms over her chest. Rather than assume a position of dominance, however, he took the chair beside hers.

  "What's wrong?"

  Pam blinked back the tears stinging her eyes. "I'm not useless."

  "No one said you were." He reached for some files on his blotter. "I took these while you were in the ladies' room to add a few notes to them. This one is a company I'm considering. I would like you to review their figures and draw up a health profile for them. Krista can show you how we put those together. All right?"

  Nodding, Pam accepted the file and glanced through it.

  "This one is a business I'm ready to turn down. I think they've already done too much damage to their bottom line to make them salvageable. Adam, however, thinks they still might be a good investment. I need another pro and con summary completed for them. Again, Krista understands the process and can help you."

  Pam took the second file from his hand and flipped through it as well, then she gazed at her boss.

  "Thank you. I'm sorry I've been so snippy. It's not too professional of me."

  "True. I should do something about your attitude, but I won’t want to leave if you're upset. So, even though I think you could benefit from a sound spanking, you're getting a temporary reprieve."

  She tilted her head to one side. "Only temporary?"

  "Yes. When I return, you and I are going to discuss why a positive attitude in the office is so important."

  "What if my attitude improves 200 percent by the time you get back? We wouldn't need the discussion then, would we?"

  "That remains to be seen." He reached out for her hand. "Come sit with me, kitten. I want to have a serious talk with you."

  She set the files back on his desk and placed her hand in his. He walked her around to his regular chair so their backs weren't to the door, and pulled her onto his lap.

  "I need you to be honest with me. Is there anything I can do to make you feel more at ease before I leave?"

  She considered his question for a moment before shaking her head. "You've done everything you can to make me feel comfortable and accepted, and—" A knock at the door cut her off.

  "Who is it?"

  "It's Adam, Rob. Can I grab a minute before you take off?"

  Pam started to get up, but Rob held her in place. "He's Krista's boss, and he's in the know. So, stay right where you are
."

  Rob waited for Pam’s agreement before he called out, "Come on in, Adam."

  A white-haired gentleman walked in. "Look, I know you don't—" He stopped. "Sorry, I didn't realize—"

  "Adam, have you met Pam, yet?"

  "Not officially." He extended his hand toward Pam. "Adam White."

  Accepting his gesture, they shook hands. "Pam Weston. I'm pleased to meet you, Mr. White."

  "Adam," he corrected. Then, he glanced over at Rob. "Krista said Pam agreed to your conditions."

  "She did. Pam, Adam is Robite Capital's financial whiz and co-founder. We count on him to run the figures and advise whether he considers a company worthy of the risk we would incur by taking them on."

  "True, which is why I feel so wretched about the Hemley deal going sour," Adam replied.

  "I think our client was conducting some private negotiations he neglected to disclose to us. Not your fault if you aren't given all the facts. Hemley was keeping secrets that backfired on him."

  "All the same, I wish you'd let me go instead."

  Rob smiled tiredly. "Unfortunately, if we're going to turn them down, I need to be the one to do it. I'm having Pam look over both the Bronson and Peacham deals. I agree with you that Bronson looks like a potential go. I'd like a pair of fresh eyes to attempt a health profile on them and have you review it with her afterward, simply to ensure we aren't making another mistake. As for Peacham, I don't like some things that showed up during our due diligence, so I asked her to do a pro and con sheet for them. I realize you consider them a good risk, but, frankly, I'm a little gun-shy."

  "I understand. Pam, please don't hesitate to come to either Krista or me with any questions."

  "Thank you, sir. I'll definitely keep your offer in mind."

  "Great."

  "Anything else, Adam?" Rob inquired politely.

  "No. I guess not. Call me when you make a firm decision."

  "I will."

  "Okay. I'll see you in a few days, then." He reached out to shake Rob's hand before he turned and left.

  "Well, that was awkward," Pam mumbled.

  "How so?"

  "If we want to keep a low profile, Mr. Peterson, sitting me on your lap is not the best way to go about it."