Love on the Forbidden Side

by Mariah Ankenman

  Why the hell do people ride these things?

  The thought kept playing through his mind the few minutes it took for them to get back to Ryder’s place. Once Julie led them into the barn, another crack of thunder—much closer this time—disturbed the afternoon air. Wind Chaser made an awful whinnying. The animal sounded so upset Liam actually felt sorry for the big beast.

  “Dismount.”

  “What?”

  “Get off the horse, Liam.”

  At her no-nonsense tone, he—less than gracefully—slid out of the saddle onto terra firma again. Never had he been so happy to be standing on his own two feet. Julie made a very elegant exit off the horse’s back, stroking the animal’s neck and whispering soft words as its hooves stamped the ground and nostrils flared.

  “What’s wrong with her?”

  “Horses don’t like storms.” Though she spoke to him, all her attention was focused on Wind Chaser. “Most animals don’t, but horses can seriously freak out. I’m going to get her settled in her stall. You go on in and start dinner.”

  Since that was what he planned to do anyway, he didn’t argue.

  Hightailing it into the house, he headed to the kitchen and set about making their meal. The steaks were in the oven, potatoes and green beans on the stove when Julie came in.

  “Wind Chaser okay?”

  A soft smile curved her pink lips. “Why, Liam, don’t tell me you’re going soft on horses now?”

  He shook his head. Just because he didn’t like riding the animals didn’t mean he was indifferent to their suffering. “I just wanted to make sure the storm wasn’t bothering her.”

  The wind had picked up in the past few minutes. Raindrops began to fall, making a soft pitter patter sound on the roof. He loved the sound of rain. It soothed his ragged nerves.

  “She’s fine. I got her settled in her pen with some carrots. They’re her favorite.”

  The windows lit up from outside, and another peel of thunder cracked the darkening sky. The storm looked to be shaping up as a bad one. Good thing they’d headed home when they did.

  “So, what did you think of your first ride?” Julie sauntered over to the table, pulling out a chair and sinking into it.

  He grimaced, rubbing his backside. “I think my first and only ride was long. Very, very long.”

  Those beautiful brown eyes rolled skyward. “We were barely out for an hour you big sissy.”

  “Careful.” He waved the spoon he was using to stir the vegetables. “Insult me again and I’ll eat all this delicious steak myself.”

  “You wouldn’t.” Her gaze narrowed.

  He met her steely-eyed look with a glint of his own. “Try me.”

  “You are so mean.”

  “Says the woman who made me ride a giant beast ’til my ass went numb.”

  She leaned over the counter. “Looks fine from where I’m sitting.”

  He would not read into that, no matter how much it puffed up his ego to know Julie admired his butt. Best friend’s sister. Way too young for you. The excuses rang more empty each time.

  A chime interrupted his inner struggle. Julie pulled her phone from her pocket. Her brow furrowed.

  “Problem?”

  “Voicemail.” She touched the screen then put it to her ear. “Damn mountain reception. It’s so spotty. I never even heard it ring.”

  He went back to the dinner, checking to make sure everything was cooking properly. Mostly just a wait and check game at this point. From the corner of his eye he saw Julie tense. Her shoulders tightened, eyes widening, breath sucking in, all of it pointing to something bad.

  “Something wrong?” he asked when she placed her phone down on the kitchen counter.

  Her gaze rested on the cell, like the thing might come to life and take a bite out of her.

  “Julie?”

  “What?” She jumped, as if having forgotten he was there.

  Shit, that’s not good. Who the hell had called her?

  “The message?” He indicated her phone with a nod of his head. “Is everything all right?”

  “Hmm? Oh, yeah. Yes. Everything is…fine. Just a small problem at work. No big deal.”

  Bullshit. He could smell a lie a mile away, and Julie Ryder was full of it. Something happened, something bad, and she was keeping it from him. Why?

  “Is dinner ready yet? I’m starving,” she said with less enthusiasm than the words suggested.

  Judging by the green pallor of her face he’d say she was sick, or…afraid. In his many years as an agent, he’d learned to read facial expression, an important skill to have. It revealed when someone was lying, guilty, or afraid. And right now, Julie had the look of someone in distress. She had an air of fear about her, a tenseness that didn’t come with simple bad news. His teeth set on edge at the thought, but if she wanted to gloss over the issue who was he to argue? He wasn’t her brother, boyfriend, or keeper. Julie was free to do as she wished, including denying something was bothering her.

  He pulled the steaks from the oven as the buzzer chimed. They set the table in silence, serving up food without conversation.

  If she wanted to keep her problems to herself that was her business, he couldn’t force the issue. What he could do, though—and damned well would do—was protect her from any threat that came her way. No matter what the message was, who had called, Liam made a silent vow to do everything in his power to make sure Julie was safe.

  A dark surge of anger and protectiveness rose inside him. No one would ever hurt her again. Not on his watch.

  Chapter 14

  The much anticipated jerk steak tasted like sawdust on her tongue. How unfair for a meal she knew was delicious to be so unappetizing. She couldn’t blame it on the chef. Liam cooked the food to perfection. No, the unpalatable meal was entirely due to the voicemail she received from her boss. The message letting her know the body of Pamela Green had been found on the side of the highway, dumped and dead. Stabbed.

  Pam worked in the courthouse, one of the housekeeping staff. Julie never talked to the woman much, but she had always been pleasant, if a little quiet, did her job and didn’t cause any trouble. Apparently, there had been more to the woman than anyone saw—her boss stated in the voicemail that Pam had been questioned by the police just hours before her body had been found. They had suspicions she’d been the one to help Jason escape.

  And now she’s dead.

  A cold chill climbed up her spine. She wasn’t a detective, but she’d worked with law enforcement enough to know nothing about this situation looked good. It now appeared Jason didn’t skip town like she had hoped. The ugly threats he’d hurled in the courtroom the day he’d been sentenced were more than idle words. They were a promise he was now making good on, and it terrified her. The only consolation she had was Jason had no idea where she was. She hadn’t told anyone where she was going, not even her boss.

  Still, it wouldn’t be hard to find out she had a brother in Peak Town. A quick internet search could reveal a lot about a person, but if Jason was still hanging around she doubted he’d have much access to a computer. The guy was a wanted fugitive. His face had to be plastered all over. No way would he risk going to an internet café or the library just to dig into her life. He probably killed Pam to get rid of any witnesses who could rat him out to the cops.

  Yeah, sure, and my jeans from high school totally still fit, too.

  Okay, she was rationalizing to make herself feel better. Who wouldn’t in a situation like this?

  “Is everything okay?”

  She glanced up from her plate into Liam’s worried golden gaze. “Hmmm?”

  “You don’t seem to be enjoying your dinner.” He pointed to her plate where her steak lay, only two bites missing. “Did I burn it or something?”

  “No, I’m sorry. I think I’m just tired or something.”

  “Tired?” One blond brow rose.

  She shot him a defensive glare. “Yes, tired.”

  “And this sudden loss
in appetite wouldn’t have anything to do with that voicemail?”

  Damn nosy FBI agent. Couldn’t the guy leave his work at home?

  “I’m just tired, Liam. I swear.”

  His eyes narrowed, gaze burning into her. Nerves made her squirm in her seat, but her lips remained sealed. No way would she bring up Jason around Liam. The guy would go into full force protection mode. He’d probably call in some of his FBI buddies and force her into WITSEC. No way. She would not spend who knows how long hiding from her life and loved ones.

  “You’re a terrible liar, Jules.”

  Well, that was just insulting. “Oh really? Then how come I’m always beating you at cards?” Suck on that Mr. Smarty-pants.

  Pushing his plate to the side, he leaned forward. “Because you cheat.”

  She copied his movements, closing the distance until their faces were inches apart. “How many times do I have to tell you? It’s not cheating. It’s house rules.”

  “Call it what you want, I can still see through it.”

  “So, what then? You just let me win?”

  A small grin kicked up the corner of his mouth. “No, I just refuse to stoop to your level.”

  Stoop to my level! Of all the—“I could beat you blindfolded playing by any rules you want.”

  “How about we both retain our vision and just play by the rules on the game instructions?”

  “You’re on.”

  The spicy smell of the steak invaded her nostrils. Without thought, she reached over to her plate, popping a bite of the meat into her mouth. Delicious spice and flavor invaded her taste buds. She moaned in pleasure. Glancing up, she saw Liam with a satisfied smile on his face. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

  “What?”

  Not buying his innocent look, she pointed her fork at him. “You baited me with cards to make me forget about—” She caught herself before she revealed the troubles with Jason. “How…tired I am.”

  Broad shoulders lifted in a shrug. “Maybe.”

  And that right there was why Liam held such a big place in her heart. She sat back in her chair and picked up her fork. Not only was the guy smart and sexy as all get out, but he always tried to make people smile, ease their burdens. When their mother had died, it was Liam who came out to help Jake with the arrangements. When she was taken hostage and tortured a few months ago, it was Liam who came out to watch over her, playing cards—and losing on purpose she suspected—until the wee hours of the night just so she wouldn’t have to face the dark alone.

  If white knights still existed, Liam Graham would be one of them.

  “It worked.” He indicated to her plate where half of her steak had disappeared.

  Wow, she hadn’t even realized she’d eaten more. Her stomach now pleasantly full, she pushed thoughts of murder and Jason to the back of her mind. The man wasn’t going to make her run from her life, and he wasn’t going to ruin her night. Not when she had much more pleasant ideas in mind.

  “Well, thank you for the distraction and the offer to play cards.”

  “No house rule?”

  “No house rules.” Using a finger, she crossed her heart. “What are we wagering?”

  A groan left him as he sat back in his seat. “Can’t you ever just play for fun?”

  “Nope.” She tried to bite back the grin at his forlorn look. “Not in the Ryder DNA, I’m afraid. We must have stakes to make the game interesting.”

  “Fine. I guess we can play for…candy?”

  Candy? What were they, a couple of schoolyard kids? She didn’t stop the indelicate snort at his suggestion. “Boring.”

  “Then what do you suggest?”

  A wicked idea entered her head. Grabbing a lock of hair, she twirled it around her finger. As if she didn’t have a care either way, she offhandedly replied, “We could always play strip cards.”

  Liam’s entire body tensed right before her eyes. The fingers gripping his fork turned white as his grasp tightened on the poor metal utensil. His face became a hard, stone mask, devoid of any emotion. But his eyes…those golden irises burned with fire. A hot, angry fire. Desire appeared in its depths.

  He wanted her, she could see it, but he was still denying himself, denying them. So stupid—they were both consenting adults. There was no harm in exploring these feelings they obviously arose in each other. What did she have to do to get through to the big lug?

  “Is that a no?” She watched, fascinated, as he swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down.

  “That’s a hell no.”

  “Why? It’s not like you have anything I haven’t seen before.”

  A dark chuckle left his lips, causing heat to pool low in her belly.

  “Careful, little girl. You’re trying to play a game you don’t know the rules to.”

  This “little girl” nonsense needed to stop. Time to give Liam a taste of his own medicine. “I forgot how you old folks get so embarrassed by your aging, flabby bodies. Scared I’ll see a few gray hairs?”

  Gaze narrowing, he pushed up from the table and strode to her, every footstep sounding like the boom of a cannon in the quiet kitchen. When he reached her side, he placed one large palm on the table in front of her. Heart racing, palms sweaty, she held her breath when he leaned down, lips inches from hers. The spicy scent of dinner wafted from him, enveloping her in a cloud of hunger. Only she wasn’t hungry for food. Her body craved something else entirely. Something carnal.

  “Nothing on this body is gray or flabby.”

  Ooooh, defensive. Guess he didn’t like getting called out on his age. Well, don’t dish it if you can’t take it, pal.

  “Care to prove that?”

  His warm, honeyed gaze roamed over her face and down her body like a caress. Tingles of awareness lit up every inch of her like the fourth of July. She leaned closer, her body drawn to him like the pull of a magnet. His hot breath warmed her cheeks, lips centimeters away. They were finally going to—

  Abruptly, he stood, pulling away.

  Hiding her disappointment, she slouched back in her chair. Crap, we were so close. What the hell?

  “No.”

  The gruff, one word answer killed the mood better than that time her brother walked in on her making out with her prom date in high school.

  “Chicken.” She couldn’t help baiting him. Truthfully, his hot and cold routine wreaked havoc on her emotions…and pride. Putting up a front of nonchalance helped to soothe the sting.

  He shook his head, expression hard. “No. Smart. We’re going to go into the living room to play cards with standard rules and keep all our clothes on.”

  She wanted to scream, rage, throw the rest of the dinner in his face. Why was he being so damn stubborn about this? They had chemistry, it was there, he had to feel it, too. Unless…he didn’t. At that unwelcome thought, her stomach turned sour. Wouldn’t it be just her luck to discover she imagined all Liam’s hot looks, misinterpreted all his caring actions…?

  Could all this heat really be one-sided?

  Mortified at the possibility, she dipped her head, shame oozing out of every pore.

  How could I have been so stupid? Like he’d really want me when he could have any woman he wants. Look at the guy! He’s a god. Who the heck am I?

  A woman with scars that would never go away, inside and out.

  “I’m sorry, Liam. I didn’t mean to make you feel… We don’t have to play cards. I’ll just go to bed.” In a rush, she stood, intending to leave the room at superhuman speed.

  Before she made it two steps, he was in front of her, blocking her path. His strong arms wrapped around her, pulling her into his chest. She didn’t fight it, but went willingly into his warm embrace, inhaling deeply the rich musky scent that was distinctly Liam.

  “Aw, crap, Julie. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “You didn’t.” She upset herself by foolishly thinking he could be into her.

  “I did. You really are a terrible liar.”
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  He chuckled, and she found herself giggling along with him.

  “But, I am serious. We can’t…go beyond what we are now.”

  Pulling away from the warmth of his chest, she stared up at him, amazed that he was finally talking about it. “Why?”

  A tortured expression crossed his face. She hated seeing it there. Liam should never look like that. If it were up to her, he’d always walk around with a smile on his face.

  “It’s just better if we stay friends.”

  Recent events crowded her mind, creating diffidence. “Is it because of what happened with David? I know my scars are ugly—”

  “Stop.” The cold, harsh word left his downturned lips, halting anything she was about to say. “This has nothing to do with David or what he did to you. You’re amazing to survive that and come out so strong.”

  She didn’t feel strong. Most days, she felt seconds away from a massive panic attack.

  “You, Julie Ryder, are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on, and nothing that monster did to you could ever change that.”

  He thinks I’m beautiful? Her heart caught in her chest, beating a million miles an hour or stopping altogether, she couldn’t tell.

  “But, then, I don’t understand. We get along great. We have fun together. If you find me attractive then why can’t we…”

  Golden eyes turned sad. One hand reached out to stroke her cheek. “Let’s just play cards, okay? It’s getting late, we’re both tired. We can talk about this another time.”

  She didn’t want to talk about this another time, she wanted to get to the bottom of it now. But she found herself nodding in agreement because as much as she wanted to hear Liam’s excuses for not moving their friendship into a more physical relationship, they had gotten further tonight than ever before. At least he finally admitted there was something there.

  You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on.

  Her mind was still blown by the confession.

  So, instead of talking—or getting naked like she really wanted—they played cards, betting candy like grade-schoolers and playing by boring standard rules. Truthfully, the night wasn’t half-bad. Of course, that could have been the cloud she rode on from Liam’s revelation. It held her up and gave her hope that maybe, someday, something would cause him to drop that last bit of denial, and they could finally be together.