Perfect Harmony

by Cee, DW

  “Ali. Come eat your breakfast.” Ben called out to her.

  “No!” was what she called out to her father.

  “She’s so sassy. I love it.” Ben was in for a long, difficult road if he didn’t change his ways.

  “Come here now, Ali. It’s breakfast time.” I commanded.

  “OK Mama.” She waddled in and her father picked her up for a thousand kisses.

  “I love you my sassy redhead. You remind me of your mother when she was little.”

  “Yeah, like you really remember what I was like when I was little,” I commented and pointed to the high chair. “Let’s get breakfast done before it’s lunch time.”

  “Yes Ma’am.” Ben was in a good mood today.

  “So...?” Mom asked again to my chagrin. How was I to answer her—especially with Ben in the room? I gave her an exasperated look and the grandparents decided to sit and join Ali for breakfast.

  “What’s going on?” Ben whispered.

  “I’ve no idea,” I returned the whisper.

  “By the way, were you being serious about going to New York?”

  “Yeah. I have to be there for my review.”

  “Can I come with you?”

  I studied Ben’s face hoping for some understanding on what was really happening here. “Do you want to come with me?”

  “Yes. I, too, have some business in New York. It’d be nice to get a little work and play in. So, is that a yes?”

  “I guess...” What else could I say?

  “Can you three watch Ali while Mar and I head to New York for a few days?”

  “What?” The grandparents and I asked simultaneously.

  “It’s a work-related trip for both of us. It would be easier not to have Ali there.”

  “Sure!” Mom answered first.

  “We’d love it!” Shea answered next.

  “Stay as long as you like. Ali will be well cared for,” Benjamin had that same grin as earlier.

  “That settles it, then,” Ben confirmed.

  “Can we talk?” This conversation was crazy necessary because I had no idea why Ben was scheduling a trip for just the two of us.

  “Sure. I’m done. Walk me out?” Ben proceeded to say good-bye to a daughter who could care less where her father was going. She was focused—holding the jack-in-the-box in one hand and attempting to shove some food in her mouth with the other. “Bye Princess.”

  “Bye” she grunted and went back to her new toy.

  When we were out of earshot of the parents, I asked, “What was that?”

  “What?” he feigned innocence.

  “Why are you planning a trip for the two of us to New York?”

  “Do you have time to hang out with our daughter when you’re there?”

  “No.”

  “Neither do I. There are meetings I can attend as well as new connections I can make. With a baby, nothing gets accomplished. Plus, I’d like to go somewhere and not have to bring everything and the kitchen sink. A carry-on for each of us, dinners on the town, and maybe even a show? Doesn’t that sound good?”

  He wasn’t wrong. That sounded heavenly. “But Ali—”

  “Will be in good care with her grandparents,” Ben interrupted my complaint. “Let’s go get some work done. We can probably be back in three days, four tops. Can you handle being away from our daughter for that many days?”

  “I guess I don’t have a choice.”

  “Good thinking. I have to run. See you tonight?”

  “Yeah. See you.”

  Absentmindedly, Ben gave me a one-armed hug and kiss on the forehead before leaving for work. It shocked the both of us.

  Walking into the house I could still feel his hand around my shoulder and his lips pressed against my face. I didn’t know what was happening to us. We were moving in a direction guided by no one.

  “Ben leave?” Mom asked.

  “Yes.”

  “So please explain what’s going on,” Shea wanted to know.

  “Honestly, I’ve no idea what’s happening, if anything. I did spend the night here but that was because Ali wet her bed. From there, one action led to another and the three of us found ourselves asleep on the same bed. If it were up to me, I would not have shared Ben and Melody’s bed—daughter between us or not.”

  “What about New York?” Mom persisted.

  “We both have meetings to attend. I think Ben asked you to babysit just so we wouldn’t have to worry about a stranger watching our daughter. No ulterior motive, no secret liaison—nothing is happening between us. We are just co-parenting this little girl.” I tousled my daughter’s hair and kissed her chubby cheeks. My daughter granted me a luscious smile.

  “Didn’t you ever wonder what it would be like to be married to our son?” Shea joined Mom in the tenacious interrogation. “With Melody no longer with us, there has to be some small part of you that wants to be reunited with our son. You two can parent Ali and give her siblings. Don’t you want that?—a husband, more children, a happily ever after?”

  “Shea, I think you three are creating your own fantasies. Your son and I are friends. Our relationship is unusual, yes, but it’s not headed in the direction you’re sending us. Ben loves my sister and that won’t ever change. I didn’t want to fight her when she was alive. It’s impossible to fight her now that she’s dead. She’ll be immortalized in his heart forever.”

  “Ben did love you in his own immature way.”

  “I know, Shea. I’m not discounting his once-feelings for me. That was long ago and there was a wife of ten years in between. I hurt profoundly when Ben and my sister became a couple. I believed I would be a Howard, not my sister. At this point in my life, I don’t want to hurt again. There’s too much at stake to risk a possibility with Ben.”

  “You don’t think Ben sees you in a different light?” His father asked.

  “He sees me as the mother of his daughter and his once-good friend. He wants to find harmony for the three of us. I think the three of you see how well we get along and you think the next step is marriage. Ben doesn’t see it that way and it would be good for all of us to accept this unusual relationship as is.”

  I hoped that would solve this mystery. “But what about your kiss?” Mom blurted out.

  Ben’s mom practically hollered, “What? What kiss?” Obviously, the mystique would not be resolved any time soon. Shea and Benjamin wanted to know.

  Could I walk out of the house with my daughter without the three following us? Probably not. The choice to keep mum was not a reality. “Ben kissed me. He told me it was a mistake and that he still loved Melody. That’s the beginning and the end. Please don’t read any more into our non-relationship.”

  That was all I could stand. It hurt to accept, again, that Ben didn’t want me. I grabbed my daughter so I could change her and start our day.

  Chapter 20 - Ben

  Let It Be ~Beatles

  “How long will you and Marni be gone?”

  “I was thinking three days, Mom. I don’t know if Marni and Ali will stand to be apart from one another for longer than that.”

  “Would you be willing to tell your father and me what’s exactly happening with you and Marni?”

  “Nope.”

  “Ben!”

  “Listen, Mom. Right now, there are no words to explain what’s happening between us. I don’t know if anything is happening.”

  Mom and Dad came over after Ali had gone to bed and began grilling me about my life. It wasn’t that I was trying to be evasive. There were few definitive answers right now.

  Dad asked, “Are you open to a new relationship?”

  “Sure. I have to face the fact that I’m young and I’ll eventually marry again.”

  “Is Marni a possible candidate?” Dad continued.

  “Any woman is a possible candidate, Dad.”

  “Don’t be a smartass, Ben Howard.” Mom wasn’t in a kidding mood.

  “Sure,” I answered to get them off my back. Their grin
s were too wide for my liking. “Mar isn’t looking for a relationship. She told me she’s going to grow old by herself.”

  “You believe her?”

  “What else am I to believe, Mom? That’s what she said. She doesn’t ever want another man.”

  “Do you want more kids? Can we expect more grandchildren?”

  “Um, yeah? Hard to say no to that, but I can’t guarantee anything, Grandma. You might have to be content with your one grandchild.”

  “We adore Alice, but we want more grandchildren and soon. It’s not good to have just one child. She’ll get too spoiled.”

  “I’m an only child,” I reminded her. “I grew up all right.”

  “That’s because you had Marni keeping you in line since you were a little boy.”

  “Sure, credit Marni for all my good traits.” I kidded.

  “Can you promise us that you’ll work on changing Marni’s mind about the future? We really want more babies.”

  “Mother. I think this conversation is over. You are beyond the finish line when neither of us is at the starting blocks.”

  “Are you and Marni sharing a hotel room?”

  “OK. Good-bye, Mother.”

  I literally pushed them out of my house. I had to pack for our adults-only trip.

  “Are you sure she’ll be all right?”

  “Mar.” I unveiled reality to her. “Once the three grandparents had our daughter in the car and they mentioned Disneyland, she didn’t even look back at you. She waved bye-bye with the biggest grin.”

  “You think Ali will ask for me when it’s bedtime?”

  “Seriously? They’re staying in a palatial two-bedroom suite at the Grand California Hotel at Disneyland for the next three days. Our daughter will be dining with princesses, going down fun slides with Grandpa, and riding Dumbo without a grumbling Dad. Are you nuts? She won’t even remember you the next three days.” Marni wasn’t convinced. “Come here.” I pulled her in for a hug in the middle of the airport terminal. “Our daughter will be fine. She’s strong like her mother, and she’ll probably have a lollipop a day with those naughty grandparents. If for some reason she can’t adjust without you, we’ll come home early. All right?”

  “I’m being silly, huh?”

  “You’re a caring, loving, perfect mother. I couldn’t have asked for a better one than you, Mar. I’m thankful you’re here.” That did it for the time being. It could be a different story once we land in New York.

  “How was your meeting?” I asked a pre-occupied woman who barely noticed I’d joined her on the park bench.

  “Not good. How was yours?”

  “Mine went well. I have another Hollywood contract. What happened with your evaluation?”

  “The eval was fine. It’s the news that came after that’s bothering me.”

  “Tell me, Mar. I’m here to help.”

  We had arrived late last night and went straight to bed. After a quick breakfast, we went our separate ways promising to meet at Bryant Park once we were done. I didn’t expect to find my friend so down.

  “My company wants me physically in the LA office.”

  “Oh…” Shit. That wasn’t good news. That would mean we’d need a new caretaker for Ali. “So what did you tell them?”

  “I told them I’d have to quit if they expected me to be there daily. I’d be willing to go in once a week, but no more than that.”

  Damn. This woman was the perfect mother for my child. “Are you upset you’re forced to stay home? I’m not quite getting what’s bringing you down.”

  She looked at me as though I was stupid. “Um…I have no job…no income…no way of supporting myself, my mother, and my daughter.” I finally got it. “I guess I’ll have to job hunt. I haven’t done that in so long, I don’t even know where to begin.”

  “Do you have to work?” She gave me that same are you stupid or something glare. Before she answered, I said, “Tell me about your finances. Let’s figure this out together.”

  “Every last dime I had went into purchasing the house. My savings, coupled with the sale of Mom’s San Diego house, paid for the one we’re living in, but there are monthly expenses like insurance, utilities, and an occasional meal out.”

  “How’s Jackie doing financially?”

  “Between retirement funds, social security, and alimony, she’s flush with cash. However, I don’t want her supporting Ali and me. As it was, the house wouldn’t have been possible without Mom’s help.”

  “All right. So Jackie is fine where cash flow is concerned. I’d like to think Ali is well taken care of by her father. It’s just you we need to worry about.”

  “It would be nice to have some money to buy Ali an outfit, or some toys. How sad would it be if Ali wanted something and I didn’t have the means to do anything about it?”

  “How about if I paid you—” Ugly Marni was about to rear her feisty red head until I put out my hand and said, “Just hear me out before you protest.” That calmed her down for now. “If you weren’t around, I’d have to pay for childcare. Since you are my childcare, can I pay you instead?” By the growl, I guessed she didn’t like my idea. I pressed on. “I make a decent living and incur practically no living expenses: house—long ago paid for by my parents, insurance—paid for by the university. All I’m responsible for are the measly utilities, food, and whatever Ali needs. Even that, you end up covering food and Ali. I don’t know the last time I purchased groceries or clothes and diapers for my daughter. I could have an issue with you usurping my right to provide for my daughter, you know.” Marni understood I was kidding. But, the expected smile didn’t manifest itself. “Just think about it.”

  “All right. I’ll think it over. I suppose if I don’t find a job soon, I’ll have to rely on both you and Mom regardless of my protest.”

  “I always knew you were a smart girl. It will all work out, Mar. It always does.” I placed my arm around her and tugged her closer to me. “How about we go out for a nice meal and maybe a show?”

  “I need to stop by Cece’s house in a little bit. Can we do a late dinner? I don’t know how long this will take.”

  “Cece—as in Noah’s mom?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Why?” I thought Noah was out of her life for good.

  “Noah and I ended, but there was no closure with his parents. All three of them were very good to me. I feel the need to pay my respects, explain why I rejected their son, and to say good-bye.”

  I didn’t really have a say in whether she went to visit Noah’s parents or not. Marni was a grown woman who had a fiancé just a few months ago. Hopefully talking to Cece would allow Mar to find closure with that chapter of her life.

  “All right. There is another meeting I rescheduled for tomorrow. Maybe I can meet with them today and you and I can have some fun tomorrow. Deal?”

  “Since I’ve no more job, my schedule is yours to command.” The smile I was hoping for finally surfaced. It was gorgeous.

  Chapter 20 - Marni

  Let It Be ~Beatles

  “Marni! It’s wonderful to see you. I didn’t think we’d ever see you again.”

  “Hi Cece. Thank you for opening your home to me. I didn’t think you’d ever want to see me again.”

  “Nonsense. You’re always welcome in this home. I just wish you’d brought that redheaded daughter of yours. I miss her.”

  “Ben and I both had work meetings in New York, so she’s at Disneyland right now with my mom and Ben’s parents.”

  “So...Ben? He’s Ali’s father and your ex?” This question was inevitable.

  “Yeah. He’s also just a friend.” I wanted to reassure the Bergstrom/Hanover family that I didn’t refuse their son because of Ben.

  “I promised Carson I wouldn’t grill you about your relationship with your daughter’s father, but I can’t help my curiosity. Will you explain? Do you mind?”

  “I don’t mind at all. But before I explain, I wondered how Noah was doing?”

 
“He’s in South America with his father. He’ll be gone for at least six months, I’m told.”

  “I’m sorry, Cece. I feel responsible for his departure.”

  “Explain everything to me. We didn’t get much out of Noah before he left. Still, he’s keeping mum, according to Eli.”

  Where to begin...

  “I loved Noah and wanted to live a lifetime with him.” I felt that needed to be said.

  “I know, Marni. None of us doubted your love for him.”

  “When Noah broke off the engagement and walked out on me when I thought my daughter was dying, I realized he would never understand nor accept my situation with Ali and Ben. I know now it was wrong of me to think he should understand, but I hoped. Noah’s accepted too much of my crazy life already; Ali’s revelation was too much.”

  “Didn’t he come back and tell you he wanted to try again?”

  “He did. He tried very hard to change my mind. However, I had already decided I wanted a life with my daughter and my mother, only. I don’t think I’m meant to have a man in my life. Noah was sweet to think we could work again. I told him I wanted to live my life as a mother and a daughter.”

  “So you refused my son because you believed you would be single the rest of your life?”

  “I see doubt on your face. You don’t think so?”

  “No way, Marni. You’ll be married before my son, I predict.” I had no idea where that came from.

  “I don’t think so, but I do hope you’ll convince Noah that it wasn’t him I was rejecting. In the end, he’ll be glad he got rid of me when he did.” I spoke with a smile.

  “I know you were disappointed when Noah walked out on you the day of your wedding. Eli, Carson, and I had a serious pow-wow with him and straightened him out. I could see why you’d be disappointed in my son and why you wouldn’t trust him with your daughter.”

  Was that how I portrayed our relationship? “It’s not Noah’s fault. If we needed to blame someone, it would be me. I kept the knowledge of Ali to myself. Everyone’s been very generous with their forgiveness.”