Nothing Remotely Familiar (My Crazy Alien Romance Book 5)

by Donna McDonald

  “Hush for a minute, please,” Lacey sighed. “I’m trying to figure out what they have done and your growling and snapping is not helping.” Lacey snapped her fingers and turned back with a large grin. “I know! Reverse the spell that has been done to change the shape to the original one.”

  Lacey held her breath as the simple but powerful spell slipped from her lips. Sometimes, simple was better. There was always a catch with the more complicated spells and the boys surely had to use a whopping one to get Larry this big!

  A dark scowl crossed her face when nothing happened again. In aggravation, she glared down at Alfred who was swimming around in circles in his plain, clear bowl. With a click, fresh gravel, plants and a miniature castle appeared in the bowl.

  “Well, it isn’t my magic,” she grumbled in frustration, looking back at the large green, leathery back of the lizard as he turned and walked into her kitchen. “Hey, where are you going?” Scrambling over the broken bits of coffee table, Lacey hurried after him.

  *.*.*

  Frost rose from where he had been kneeling. Taar’s footprints led to the small set of buildings. He knew there was trouble when three large mammals raced by him ten minutes before. He could practically smell the fear rolling off their hair-covered bodies. Tightening his hand on the small explosive charges, he stepped out of the shadows of the trees heading toward the large brown building first.

  He stopped when a furry creature poked its head out of the rectangular hole cut into the bottom of the set of large, double doors. A moment later, the small round bundle of golden fur fell face first into the dirt before scrambling up on short legs to charge at him.

  Frost bent and scooped the round ball of wiggling fur up with his free hand when it started making whining noises. He quickly had to use his other arm to contain it as it tried to lick his face. A grimace of distaste and a twinge of amusement went through him at the determination of the little mammal to mark him with its tongue.

  He glanced at the closed door and deduced that if Taar had made his way into it, this creature wouldn’t have survived the first minute. Turning in a half-circle, his eyes swept the immediate area. He froze, his arms tightening on the creature in his arms, as he spied the drinking cup on the ground.

  “Quiet, beast,” he murmured. “This is not a good place for you. Go back into your brown building until I have taken care of the situation.”

  The small bundle wiggled again, but was quiet at least. Frost carefully set the creature back down on the ground and pushed it towards the barn. He walked over to the cup and picked it up, noting the dark stain in the soil and small footsteps mixed with Taar’s larger ones. The tracks led to the white building. His face darkened when he noticed the door to the front of it had been smashed in.

  He sprinted toward the building, only slowing when he heard Taar’s sharp snarl followed by a soft, annoyed voice. He caught himself as he stumbled in surprise. It was not Taar that caused him to be startled, but the annoyance in the voice of the native inhabitant. It was obvious from the soft, lilting voice that it belonged to a female. A female that should have been screaming in terror.

  Frost cursed when a tiny streak of golden fur flashed past him into the dwelling. He had been distracted by the cup and tracks and didn’t realize the small mammal hadn’t gone into the building as he ordered. He watched as it slid on the slick floor before bouncing off to the left. He was sure that was where he would find Taar.

  *.*.*

  “Hey! Stop that! Bad Larry. Very, very bad, lizard,” Lacey scolded as the door to her refrigerator was ripped off its hinges. “I swear the boys are going to get an ugly old toad back if you don’t behave.”

  Lacey threw her hands up to protect her face as a jar of pickles flew over one leathery shoulder. She gasped as another container, this time of yogurt, sailed past as well to splatter against the wall. Her cry of rage went unanswered as the green menace turned its attack to her freezer when it didn’t find anything it wanted in the refrigerator.

  “No!” Lacey wailed in dismay as ‘Larry’ scooped out a pile of her Rocky Road ice cream with one claw before it tossed the container to the floor. “That is my favorite de-stressor! That does it,” she snarled. “I’m going to… to…”

  Lacey fell back as the monster lizard turned. This time, it held a very long and very sharp knife in its claw. She had forgotten to take it out after chipping the ice when the power went out after the storm last night. By the time she discovered the breaker had also tripped, the freezer had begun to defrost, leaving the ice in the ice tray all stuck together.

  “Larry, put the knife down now,” Lacey whispered in a soft, desperate voice as she raised her hands. “Lizards shouldn’t play with knives.”

  *.*.*

  Taar’s lips curled back. Nothing! There was nothing worth eating in the food preparation area. His mouth still burned from the bitterness and his stomach cramped from the rocks and water he had swallowed. Fury burned through him. There was no meat in the cold container. The only satisfaction so far was that he had found a primitive weapon. A weapon that finally brought the look of fear to the female’s eyes.

  “Finally,” he growled. “Perhaps if I cut you up I’ll be able to eat on your flesh without you poisoning me. If not, at least it will shut you up.”

  A rumble of pleasure escaped him when she stumbled backwards as he stepped closer. He would bury the sharp blade through the female’s heart and cut it out. Gripping the wooden handle of the long, thin blade in his right claw, he started to swing the blade when something grabbed the end of his tail.

  Pain exploded through him as a series of sharp teeth sunk deep into the tip of his tail just short of the short, poisonous spikes near the end. The very tip of his tail was the only vulnerable area of his body. The flesh was softer and unprotected by the hard, leathery scales that covered the rest of him. Most adversaries avoided that part of his body because of the poison contained in the rigid spikes, unaware of the sensitivity in the lower tip.

  A howl of pain and rage shook the kitchen as he lifted his tail in an attempt to shake off whatever was biting him. His eyes widened when he saw a miniature replica of the furry creature from earlier hanging on to the end. Only this one had a massive head filled with teeth attached to an extremely small body.

  “Let go of me!” Taar roared, swinging his tail frantically as the creature continued to hang on to the end with its foot-long teeth. “Release me.”

  With a snap of his tail, the creature flew through the air. Nausea and pain flared as the tip of his tail went with it. The loud cry of the female mixed with his as she grabbed the flying furry mass in midair, twirling on her heels to keep her balance as she caught it. Taar stepped forward, the blade clenched tightly in his hand. Now, it was time to kill.

  Chapter Five

  Frost stood in the doorway of the dwelling staring in shock at the female. He blinked several times to clear his eyes. Nothing else seemed to register in his mind except that she was glowing… with the bright, soft light of the early morning sun reflecting across a fresh snowfall. The brilliant colors swirling around her settled on her skin like the first touch of frost against the petals of the snow flowers.

  He watched the patterns settle around her. As the twinkling faded, the delicate patterns caressed her skin dancing for him. Patterns only he could see. Patterns showing that she was his chosen one.

  Time suddenly fast forwarded as he realized that she was in mortal danger. Panic and fear, two emotions that he refused to acknowledge, ricocheted through him as he caught the glint of cold metal and Taar’s massive form behind her.

  “Taar!” Frost yelled, throwing his right hand up. “Freeze.”

  The dark brown eyes of the female jerked up to his in shock. Her lips parted to form a small, delectable circle as she stared back at him. He barely registered that she had her arms wrapped protectively around the body of the golden-haired mammal. He did look twice when the tiny creature suddenly let go of the tip of Taar’s tail
and grinned up at him.

  “Move,” Frost snarled as he continued to shoot bursts of ice outward toward Taar.

  A confused frown crossed the lovely face of the female as she tilted sideways away from where the icy stream was pulsing. She gasped as she saw the ice-covered mask of the lizard behind her. She stumbled against a chair that had fallen. The movement, combined with the extra weight in her arms, caused her to move backwards instead of toward him. At the same time, Taar’s enraged roar and the sound of shattering ice echoed through the room.

  “What is going on? Who are you?” the female shouted in exasperation. “Larry, let… me… go!”

  Frost clenched his fingers into a tight fist as Taar wrapped one of his hands in the female’s long dark brown hair while the other raised the sharp blade to her throat. The sound of the Learian’s loud hisses rubbed against his senses like sand against glass.

  “Star Ranger!” Taar hissed, ignoring the sharp stinging in his tail and the pulsing shocks burning the palm of his hand where he gripped the female. “I should have known that Passion would send you. This is going to make my escape even sweeter knowing I’ve killed yet another one of you.”

  “Let her go, Taar,” Frost responded in a cold, hard voice. “This is between you and I.”

  “Not any longer,” Taar sneered. “This one is going to die.”

  Frost’s mind worked frantically at a way to get the female away from Taar. Fear and rage burned inside him as the blade in Taar’s fisted claw rested against the pale skin of the female. He fingered the explosives in his other hand. They would stun Taar briefly, but they might kill the woman.

  His eyes moved to the slender figure that had become very still. The look of uncertainty and confusion was still in her eyes, but there was something else as well, as if she was trying to understand what they were saying. Her eyes locked with his and he saw she was studying him with a frown. He rolled the small explosives in his left hand. Her eyes moved to his hand before rising to look at him again, this time with disapproval. She gave a tiny shake of her head.

  Frost couldn’t hold back his growl of frustration. The stupid female had no idea of the danger she was in! Stiffening his shoulders, he slipped the explosives into the pocket of his trousers. The likelihood of him surviving a hand-to-hand combat with the Learian was slim, but he had no choice. He could not let Taar kill his female.

  “Fight me,” Frost demanded in desperation. “Hand to hand, no weapons, just you and me.”

  Taar’s bark of harsh laughter resounded through the room at Frost’s challenge. Frost took a step forward when Taar jerked on the female’s hair instead, pulling her back a step and drawing a cry of pain from her. His hands instinctively tried to reach for her before his mouth dropped open as she suddenly turned around in fury and pressed one hand against Taar’s chest. The blade Taar held against her throat vanished into a puff of smoke as she twirled to face the Learian.

  He fell back a step when her voice rose in a commanding tone. He didn’t understand a word she was saying, but whatever it was had a profound effect on Taar. The Learian’s eyes widened in shock before he began to shimmer. One second the huge reptilian species stood in front of the female, the next he was gone.

  Frost stood frozen in disbelief watching as the woman lowered the golden mammal in her arms to the ground before she grabbed a small, clear container off the floor. With another series of mumbled words, the contents of the container disappeared. When she finally stood straight again, she was holding the container between the palms of her hands with a look of disgust on her face. Inside was a miniature replica of Taar, now only about five inches high.

  His throat worked up and down as the female turned her heated gaze on him. He started to stumble backwards when she took a step toward him, her eyes glittering in determination. His vision blurred as she waved her hand at him. Panic gripped him as the world began to grow around him. He tried to turn on his heel, but found he was unable to move as trillions of sparkling lights danced around him for several long, eternal seconds.

  His eyes closed as he fought with his frozen muscles, trying to get them to obey him. When he opened his eyes, the golden mammal was looking at him, nose to nose. He grimaced when a pink tongue swept out to lick the fur covering his face.

  Fur! I don’t have… Frost thought for a brief moment before his eyes lit on the reflection in the smoky glass of what looked like a cooking device. With a tentative hop forward, he gazed at his reflection. I… I… His brain rebelled at the same time as he felt a firm, but gentle hand, grab him by the back of his neck and lift him. I have long ears! He thought before his mind shut down and he slipped into an exhausted slumber as soothing words washed over him.

  — END OF EXCERPT —

  See the original Magic, New Mexico series

  by SE Smith at

  www.sesmithfl.com/book-series/magic-new-mexico-series/

  Want to see all the books in the

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  Also By This Author

  My Crazy Alien Romance

  Tangling With Topper

  Touching Topper

  Timeless Topper

  Topper’s Magical Christmas

  Nothing Remotely Familiar

  Aliens In Kilts

  Matchmaker Abduction

  Nate’s Fated Mate

  Shades Of Darcone

  Cyborgs: Mankind Redefined

  Peyton 313

  Kingston 691

  Marcus 583

  Eric 754

  William 874X

  Nero 1000

  Nano Wolves

  Ariel

  Brandi

  Heidi

  Reed (Coming Soon)

  About the Author

  USA Today Bestselling Author, Donna McDonald, published her first novel in March of 2011. Many multi-genre novels later, she admits to living her own happily ever after as a full-time author. Addicted to making readers laugh, she includes a good dose of romantic comedy in every book.

  Contact Donna…

  www.donnamcdonaldauthor.com

  email@donnamcdonaldauthor.com