The Deceiver's Heart

by Jennifer A. Nielsen

  An arm wrapped tightly around me, but I didn’t feel it. I only knew it was there.

  The arm was holding a body that might’ve been mine, once, whoever I was, whatever I was. I felt no connection to flesh anymore. I felt no connection to life.

  Downstream from the bridge, I was stationed in some thick brush beside the river. I doubted anyone would see me here, though I had a good view of both the bridge and the Coracks on the hillside. My heart was racing with anticipation, but so far, everything was going according to plan.

  Huge must have only been unconscious for a few minutes. Only moments ago, he’d raced past me on horseback headed farther downstream, nodding distinctly at me as he did. I hoped he’d already guessed my plans and intended to help.

  My plans … such as they were. I hadn’t had time to consider any details beyond where I now sat. After leaving Huge, my first stop had been the Ironheart Coracks, and it was a good thing I did because Sir Henry wasted no time in breaking his promise regarding them.

  Up on the bridge, I saw the Dominion soldiers grab Trina and then Henry shouted, “With my authority as Lord Endrick’s representative, I order your hearts to be crushed!”

  A gasp rang out through the assembled armies on our side of the river as one by one, the Coracks collapsed to the ground. A flawless performance. I’d gotten to them just in time.

  Before coming here, I’d restored Tenger and the other Coracks, borrowing the health of the few Dominion fighters who’d lain injured on the hillside nearby. The Coracks who’d fallen were very much alive, but for now, we wanted the Dominion to believe the rebellion had been crushed here.

  Yet, as smoothly as everything had happened up till this point, it all fell apart on the bridge. Immediately after the Coracks collapsed, Trina was tossed over the bridge, making the long drop into the water. I crouched forward, ready to pull her out if I could, but when her body drifted past me seconds later, she was out of reach and looked unconscious. It twisted my heart to sacrifice her while I waited to help Simon, but I hoped Huge would see her. Why had she come to the bridge anyway?

  On the bridge now, a Dominion officer pulled something from the left pocket of Simon’s longcoat. I squinted to see it, but only saw something that appeared to be a rock or some sort of dark-colored ball. Whatever it was, it clearly enraged Henry, who slammed his fist so hard into Simon’s stomach, he might’ve fallen without the officer still holding him from behind.

  Simon was bent over, so he didn’t see Henry’s gesture for the archer to take aim. But I saw it, and the white disk that was loaded into his bow. As soon as Simon straightened up, he was hit somewhere in the chest and fell backward into the water. I probably had thirty seconds before he’d drift down to where I was.

  A cheer went up on the Dominion side of the bridge when Simon fell, but my attention had shifted to movement on Reddengrad’s side. Harlyn Mindall stepped forward from the crowd with her own disk bow raised. She took aim at the bridge and fired.

  It hit directly on the ball that Henry had pulled from Simon’s coat, and in that instant, the entire bridge exploded. I leapt to my feet, stunned at what was happening. The center collapsed and fell into the river. No one on the bridge could have survived the initial explosion. Including Sir Henry.

  He couldn’t have survived that.

  Simon’s body rounded the bend in the river. I was still shaking when I dove in, catching the current barely in time to see him go completely underwater. The water was icy, stealing my breath, but it was nothing compared to what must be happening to Simon now, so I forced myself to keep swimming.

  By the time I grabbed hold of him, he was completely unresponsive, possibly already … whatever he would be once that disk took effect. I yanked the disk from his chest and blood spilled into the water, but I pressed my hand over the wound to slow the bleeding.

  I needed to get us out of the water, but I wasn’t sure how far we had to go before it was safe, and I wondered how I’d have the strength to do it. Simon was pulling life from me faster than I could keep us together.

  Once I was sure we’d be out of sight, we surfaced, but Simon wasn’t breathing and that sent waves of horror through me. Had he already passed the point where I could help him?

  Then, from nowhere, hands reached into the water, plucking both me and Simon out of the water. I looked up and saw Huge standing over us. “Two fish with one hook,” he said proudly, pulling us to shore. This was where he’d been in such a hurry to go. He must’ve guessed at my intentions.

  “I …” I couldn’t muster the words to explain myself and instead only managed, “I’m sorry … for before.” To which he nodded in reply.

  Trina was on the shoreline shivering, but on her feet with wide eyes and the same expression of panic as I felt. She cried, “Is he—”

  Huge lowered Simon to the ground first then I knelt beside him, rolling Simon’s lifeless face toward me. He was visibly shaking and his skin was draining of color. It terrified me to my core, and from that same place I yelled, “You are not leaving this way, do you hear me?”

  If he heard, he didn’t respond.

  I put my hand back on his chest, near where the disk blade had entered. The wound was slowly healing, but it didn’t matter because that wasn’t the true threat against him. Louder, I cried, “Simon, don’t you walk away without a fight!”

  His lashes fluttered, which I supposed was the best fight he could manage. I knew he’d disapprove of what was coming next, but I hardly cared. If he objected, he could wake up and tell me so.

  The white blade was stealing away his soul. The only cure would be to give him half of mine, half of everything I was to pull him back to himself. It wasn’t enough to give him from my strength. I had to give him a piece of me.

  With my other hand over my chest, I willed any power in me to transfer to him. Instantly, I felt a gathering of energy toward my hand, a swelling of something deeper than the beat of my heart or the blood in my veins. It was whatever force kept me alive, and I sent it to him through my hand.

  Emptying out so much of myself immediately took its toll. A wave of dizziness washed over me, but I kept my hand in place, holding on to him with only tendrils of hope to connect us.

  A piece of my own soul must have transferred too, because suddenly I was part of him. Whatever of Simon remained.

  How very empty he was, little more than a shell of who he had been. Hoping for anything I could latch on to, I dug deeper and through our connection, found remnants of his soul, scattered like leaves in the wind. His worries still remained, stronger now with no reason or thought to control them. No wonder he had been shaking. I felt those same emotions too, and they filled me with ice. I understood now why he didn’t want to take the throne, how he feared he’d be less than he should. Then I saw myself through his eyes. Not as I was now, but as he feared I might become with magic. Corrupted, vengeful, rotted from within. With gray scarred lines on my face, one for each death I had caused.

  Just like Endrick.

  I recoiled from that with so much force, so much terror, that I returned to myself beside the river. Nothing had changed. I leaned in closer, hoping he could sense that I was here with him, very much alive, and that I needed him to stay alive too.

  “Simon, you come back to me!” I shouted. “I can’t fight alone!”

  “His finger twitched!” Trina cried. “Kestra, keep going!”

  I wanted to, but there wasn’t much of me left either. Simon was borrowing more than half of my soul; he was feeding on my emotions, my physical strength. He was emptying me out just to keep a thread of himself connected to reality.

  But with that thread, he must have been aware of my presence inside him, for I felt his soul wrap around mine as if it were an object of curiosity. He needed to do this, but every piece of him that was being pulled away took more of me too.

  That piece of me entered the world of Endrick’s eternal punishment and it was worse than anything I could have imagined. Nothing was here
but a dark empty field, where hundreds of others who had been given similar fates wandered, forever restless. They were in a dense maze of trees, burned to nothing but blackened sticks in sterilized soil. Seeking to cure a hunger that could not be filled, searching for relief from pain that could not be healed. These were the souls who wandered All Spirits Forest. It was more than a prison for those who had tried to take shelter there during the War of Devastation, many of them Loelle’s people. It was also the worst sort of prison Lord Endrick could have created. Simon would go here too.

  “Kestra?” In this vision, I saw a man staring at me, familiar but part of a distant memory. He was clothed as I last remembered him, but entirely without color and with gray wisps fluttering from his body, each loss a slow deterioration of what it was to be him.

  “Darrow?” I blinked hard. “Father?”

  “This is no place for you,” he said. “Get out while you can!” And he interlocked his fingers, shoving a rush of energy toward me that thrust me back into my own reality, even as I clutched for one last glimpse of him and watched him vanish before my eyes.

  I was here again by the side of the river, kneeling over Simon and now fully aware of his destination if I could not pull him back.

  I shook Simon’s body, then put both hands on his chest again, willing to sacrifice my whole life if it saved him from that place, from that doomed forest. “Come back,” I ordered him. “Now!”

  And with a final burst of magic, something rushed into him with so much force that it knocked my hands from his chest and rolled me backward. When I opened my eyes, Simon was staring at me, confused, but slowly becoming aware of his surroundings. It was him.

  I sat up again and touched his face. He whispered my name, but I wasn’t finished. I couldn’t be finished because the wound in his chest was open again. I hadn’t pulled him back together only to lose him to physical injury now.

  My hand was shaking when I placed it near the wound. I tried to pull the injury to myself, but it wouldn’t come. I put one hand over the other, ignoring his whispers for me to stop, ignoring the warnings in my own head that I’d gone too far.

  “Enough!” From behind, Trina pulled me away from him. “Kestra, you’ve done enough.”

  I shook my head and tried to get back to his side, but I had no strength for it. When I looked at her, I realized we were no longer alone. It wasn’t only Huge and Trina here. A man on horseback in a brown uniform with a blue sash was here along with another dozen Halderians.

  I spoke to the man on horseback, assuming he was in charge. “You can bind his wound now—you can save him.”

  Trina addressed the same man. “Commander Mindall, he needs your help.”

  “I respect his courage, but fixing this injury would require too many of our supplies. We’ll use them on our own men.”

  Somehow, I found it in me to look up at the commander and say, “He is the most important of all your men.”

  “Kes, no,” Simon mumbled, though he was weaker than I was and could not stop me.

  Simon’s satchel was still around his shoulder. Trina dug through it to find his ring, then held it up as I said, “King Gareth chose this boy as his successor. Simon has the king’s ring and if you look closely, you will recognize the sword he wears. He is your king, and you will do everything in your power to save his life now.”

  All eyes turned to Mindall, who took a few deliberate breaths before saying, “Give this boy everything he needs to stay alive.”

  Simon’s eyes fluttered as he was carried away. I didn’t care if he was angry with me. He was alive.

  And only once he was gone did I collapse too.

  Soon after Simon was taken away, Huge leaned over me as I lay on the sand, struggling to remain conscious. “Take some strength from me, my lady. I’ve got plenty.”

  I shook my head, mumbling, “I already did that. I won’t do it again.”

  Trina knelt at my side. “Then use me.” She nudged my hand onto her arm. “Just don’t get greedy.”

  I didn’t want to, but the truth was that I had given too much to Simon and I was having trouble keeping my eyes open. The way I felt, if I closed them for too long, they might remain that way.

  “I’m sorry for this.” I tried to control the pull of Trina’s strength toward me, but even then, she gasped when she felt the tug of my magic.

  I took from her the least I needed to keep myself alive, and it lasted only a few seconds, but when I pulled my hand free, she was leaning heavily on one arm to prevent herself from falling to the ground.

  “Still a Dallisor, taking as much as you can,” she muttered, though I thought I saw a hint of a smile.

  “Let’s get you both to safety.” Huge lifted me first, lowering me into a wagon I hadn’t noticed before. Trina was laid beside me, and we were both fully covered in sheets as would be done for the dead. That seemed appropriate. Even if they were intended to prevent any Dominion soldiers from spotting us, I felt more dead than alive. Before the wagon’s first bump, I was asleep.

  After waking up, the first words I heard were a scolding.

  “You were never to use your skills beyond half of your own strength! That nearly killed you!”

  Loelle.

  I smiled weakly. “How will I know what half is if I don’t go beyond it?” With that, I opened my eyes. I didn’t recognize the tent where they were keeping me, but it was small and simple, and I was warm. Better still, I was alive.

  “Where are we?” I asked.

  “We’re in the Hiplands, just outside Nessel. I got here in time to save you from your own foolishness.”

  “Where’s Simon?”

  Loelle licked her lips and her eyes darted away from me. “Someone else should answer that question.” She stood and parted the tent flap. “She’s awake.”

  A moment later, Captain Tenger and Gabe walked in, surely noticing how my expression deflated. I’d hoped to see Simon.

  Gabe leaned against the door, his attempt at guard duty while Tenger took Loelle’s seat beside me. “Well, young lady, you have exceeded my expectations.”

  “How low were your expectations?” I smiled, but it hadn’t been a joke.

  “Whatever they were, we must ask greater things of you now.”

  “I’m ready. Just give me the Olden Blade.” When he didn’t move, my stomach twisted. “You don’t have it?”

  “Lonetree Camp was destroyed before I got Basil’s note. I was hoping he might’ve told you where it is or offered any clues.”

  “He didn’t. Can’t we just ask him now?” I sat up on my elbows, feeling short of breath and desperately worried. “Where’s Basil? Is he—”

  “Captured by the Dominion. We’ll do our best to get him back, Kestra, but if the Dominion realizes he holds the secret of the Olden Blade—”

  “Then we’re finished.” I lay back and closed my eyes, suddenly exhausted.

  Tenger patted my arm. “He should have a little extra time, thanks to Trina’s bravery.”

  With my eyes closed, it was far too easy to picture the sudden fire on the bridge, all the bodies that fell. “Trina was responsible for the bridge collapse?”

  “And Harlyn Mindall, one of the Halderians. We believe it led to the deaths of at least four senior officers in the Dominion army … as well as Sir Henry Dallisor, Lord Endrick’s second in command.”

  I appreciated that Tenger didn’t reference him as my father. He was only a name to me now.

  Yet, he was more than a name too, though I had no wish to dwell on that.

  When I opened my eyes again, Loelle was standing behind the captain, looking as if a terrible weight had settled on her shoulders. Tenger wasn’t smiling either. He said, “There is something else of great concern to us. An explosion that makes the bridge collapse look like child’s play.” He looked up at Loelle to continue.

  She said, “After Wynnow caught me with the necklace, she ordered my arrest, but I escaped. For your sake, I remained hidden near the Brillian palace
.” Loelle paused, possibly recalling the sounds and smells of that night, just as I had so often done. “I saw the explosion, Kestra. It must have destroyed half the capital city, including the entire palace. Seconds later, I saw you race down the hillside as fast as that horse could carry you.”

  “I didn’t cause that!” I said, realizing only after I spoke where this conversation was headed.

  “Of course not,” Tenger said. “Nothing could explain such extensive damage … outside of magic.”

  Loelle added, “We believe that Lord Endrick was there and that he now has the necklace. Is that true?”

  I lowered my eyes, letting my silence answer them. Confirming it aloud would invite more questions, none of which I wanted to revisit.

  Tenger gave a long sigh, then said, “I’ll require your full explanation … when you’re stronger. Then we’ll figure out how to explain it to the Brillians when they come to you for answers.”

  I could only imagine how that conversation would go. But for now, I had other worries. “May I see Simon?”

  “Not now, I’m afraid.”

  Alarmed, I started to sit up. “Is he still—”

  “Alive? Yes, but he is a king now … thanks to you. And he has his duties, as you have yours.”

  “Five minutes, Tenger. Haven’t I earned that much?”

  His smile became almost sympathetic. “You have, but that’s not my decision. Even I have no access to him. Trust me, I’ve tried.”

  Biting on one lip, I asked, “Does he know I’m here?”

  “I don’t know.” Tenger said Gabe’s name, then, “You heard the Infidante. Will you try to answer her question? You too, Loelle.”

  Gabe nodded. “Yes, sir.” Then he parted the tent flap for Loelle and followed her out, leaving me alone with Tenger. That was no accident.

  Tenger turned back to me, and the time for sympathy had passed. “There’s no future for you and Simon, no hope. Do you understand that?”