Trailblazer

by Anna Schmidt

  “You’re being very bossy for a man wearing a silly mask,” she noted, but she sat and removed her own mask.

  He grinned. “I thought it might make me more mysterious—more appealing.”

  “Well, you certainly caught the attention of at least two of the single young ladies at the party.”

  He frowned and removed his mask, discarding it and running his fingers through his hair. “I hoped to appeal to you.”

  “Why?”

  He signed heavily but kept his gaze on the corral. “Look, you and me—well, we’ve each got plans for the future, and it seems to me they may not be plans that travel the same trail, and yet…”

  “And yet?” She touched his hand.

  “I like you, Grace Rogers. I like you a lot.”

  She considered whether in this case honesty was indeed the best policy and decided it was. “I feel the same and have no earthly idea what to do about it.”

  “I can think of one thing,” he said, leaning closer.

  “Please don’t. Your men are likely to—”

  “My men are either out tending the herd or up there at the house enjoying the party in spite of all their grousing.” He took her hands in his. “We’re quite alone here, Grace. We could kiss, and nobody would know.” He hesitated and then, to her surprise, pulled back. “Sorry. You’re probably thinking I’m no different from old man Perkins.”

  She touched his chin, turning his face to hers. “You are nothing like that horrid man, Nick. You’ve been thoughtful and gentle, and you respect a lady even if she is only hired help.”

  The music drifted faintly across the yard that stretched between them and the party. Nick stood. “Dance with me?”

  “Why, sir, I would be delighted.” She stood and stepped into the circle of his outstretched arms—and this time she gave in to the urge to rest her cheek against his chest.

  * * *

  Nick had been looking for an opportunity to speak privately with Grace when the boss had come up next to him and pointed to the dance floor. “Jasper’s up to his usual tricks. I may need your help. He’s drunk, and that means things can get nasty. I won’t have him spoiling this night for Rita.”

  And that was when Nick had spotted Grace. The boss’s brother-in-law had her clenched against his chest, and the expression on her face spoke of panic that bordered on fear. His boss led the way, but during the discussion that followed, Nick tightened his fists, only just holding on to his temper. Once John led the man away, it was all Nick could do to keep himself from wrapping his arms protectively around Grace and leading her from the dance floor. But that would not do. Not for her and not for Mrs. Lombard if guests began gossiping. So he did the only thing that seemed logical—he stepped in to finish the dance.

  And now they were dancing once again, only this time as they swayed to the music, it was as if they moved as one. She pressed her cheek to his chest while he rested his chin against her soft hair. As the music came to an end, he spun her away and then back into his arms. Their faces were so close that a kiss seemed inevitable. She touched his cheek. He raised his hands to frame her face.

  “You are a beautiful woman, Grace Rogers,” he said as he kissed her temple and then her closed eyelids.

  She laughed nervously. “A woman who should get back to work.” She stepped away from him. “Thank you, Nick. I’m fine, truly. I’ll just—”

  He caught hold of her hand. “Remember that piece of land I showed you last week?”

  She nodded.

  “I’ve been making payments every week, and well, one day…”

  He saw that she was genuinely pleased for him, sharing his joy. He also saw that she didn’t understand why he was telling her this now. “I know we haven’t known each other that long, but out here, things tend to be different than maybe they are where you come from.”

  “Different how?”

  “I don’t know. I’m not much good at words. I guess what I mean is folks out here tend to take action quicker than they might in places where things are more established, more certain.” She was no longer trying to move away from him, and he took that as a good sign. “See, Grace, like I told you, I have this dream of owning my own spread. And along with that come other things—important things.”

  “Such as?”

  “A wife. Kids. A family.” He barely managed to get the words out. “Look, Grace, I know up to now, maybe we’ve been headed down different paths, but lately, I’ve been thinking. I mean, do you think you might consider us walking together? Maybe not right away but some day. I mean, once I’ve cleared the land and built a cabin and gotten a start on a herd and you’ve put together the money your pa needs… What I’m trying to say is, could you see yourself thinking about sharing that with me someday, Grace?”

  They were linked only by his hand holding hers, but the spark that connected them as they stood facing each other was undeniable. She bowed her head. “Nick, I not only have responsibilities to my family, but also an obligation to the Harvey Company.”

  “But someday?”

  She looked at their joined hands. He held his breath. “Yes. Someday,” she agreed. She looked up at him and smiled. “And now I must go. Lily and Emma will be frantic.”

  “All right, but first, let’s seal the bargain.” He stepped closer. “Someday?”

  She offered him her handshake.

  He chuckled as he pulled her close. “Afraid a simple handshake won’t do, Grace.”

  She took a half step and touched his face. “We could seal our bargain with a kiss,” she suggested.

  He kissed her, tentatively at first, not wanting to do anything that might remind her of the encounter with Perkins. But when she wound her fingers through the thickness of his hair at the nape of his neck, he deepened the kiss.

  The soft roundness of her breasts pressed against the hard muscles of his chest. He heard the sound she made signaling pleasure when he traced her lips with his tongue. His desire hardened into something far too dangerous to unleash at a time and place like this. But someday…one day.

  He broke the kiss but not his hold on her.

  “I have to go,” she whispered.

  “I know. Tomorrow?”

  “Yes.”

  He understood neither of them knew what they were agreeing to in that exchange. “And the day after that?” he called as she headed back toward the party.

  “Yes,” she replied.

  “And the day—”

  “Yes, yes, and yes,” she shouted, and he heard her laughter blending with the music.

  * * *

  As she worked the rest of the party, Grace could not seem to stop smiling. Nothing bothered her—not having to mop up a spilled drink or having to console a lost child until her mother could be found in the throng of guests. She wondered if this could be love. She had never been in love before. Certainly, what she’d shared with Buford could not be called love, but what she felt for Nick was unlike anything she’d ever experienced. It made her deliriously happy, and at the same time, it drove her to distraction. How could things ever work out between them?

  She had four months to go on her contract, and even sending her parents every penny she could save, it might still not be enough. If she married Nick, there would be no money to send home, because there would be no job. And with Nick, there would be a whole new set of struggles—challenges that might be more than what they felt for each other now could survive. Then what?

  “Ready?”

  She hadn’t heard Emma come alongside her. “Yes. Let’s go.”

  Aidan had sent a wagon to drive them all back to the hotel. “I should have warned you girls about Jasper Perkins,” Jake said once they were on their way. “He didn’t…do anything, did he, Grace?”

  So they had all seen her on the dance floor. “No. And Mr. and Mrs. Lombard were very kind and apolo
getic.”

  “Still, you should watch yourself around him,” Jake warned. “He’s not likely to forget once he sets his sights on you.”

  “He was quite drunk. I doubt he’ll remember,” Grace replied, anxious to close the conversation.

  “He’ll remember,” Jake muttered. “Just watch yourself, okay?”

  His warning was unsettling but not such that it could do anything to overshadow the memory of Nick’s proposal of someday and the dance they had shared—and most especially the kiss. Grace settled back against the rough side of the wagon and smiled. Yes, what she felt for Nick Hopkins had to be love.

  Later, when she told Emma and Lily what had happened with Nick, she did not exactly get the reaction she’d hoped for. Instead of being delighted for her, both of them seemed to be taken aback.

  “But you need to be careful,” Emma exclaimed. “I mean, things have already developed so quickly between the two of you, and kisses can—”

  “What we’re trying to tell you, my innocent friend,” Lily interrupted, “is that soon—very soon—kisses won’t be enough for him—or you, given the fact that you’re obviously head over knickers for the guy. Kissing leads to touching leads to undressing leads to—”

  “All right,” Grace cried. “I’m not as innocent as you may believe. I did grow up on a farm, after all. Why can’t you just be happy for me? I thought you both liked Nick.”

  “Oh, honey, we are—we do,” Lily assured her. “It’s just that—”

  A knock at the door stopped her from finishing her thought.

  “Come in,” Lily called.

  To their surprise, Miss Kaufmann opened the door. “How was the party?” she asked.

  “It was lovely,” Emma assured her. “Thank you for giving us the opportunity to be there.”

  Miss Kaufmann smiled. She pulled an envelope from the pocket of her apron and handed it to Grace. “This came for you today. Time for bed, girls,” she added as she left, closing the door behind her.

  The letter was from her mother. Grace tore the envelope open and scanned the first page. “They did get the money I sent after all,” she shouted before reading on. “And it was enough to buy new work boots for my brothers and feed for the livestock,” she added, her voice rising with excitement. Lily and Emma joined her on her bed and leaned in over her shoulder.

  Early on, Grace had realized that neither Lily nor Emma seemed to get mail, so she had begun sharing her mother’s letters with them. Now they knew her siblings by name and age and were always anxious for news of their latest adventures. Grace’s mother always asked after her friends, and it pleased her that her real family and the people she’d come to think of as family had a connection.

  She had never written anything about Nick or even mentioned him by name. Lily had teased her about that. Tonight, she was glad her mother knew nothing of Nick. It would be hard to explain who he was and what he meant to her, when she wasn’t sure she understood herself. Once she’d settled into her job at the hotel, she’d begun to see a plan for her future that went beyond just helping her family financially. But lately, she found herself planning a life right here in New Mexico—a life that included her friends and maybe even a future with Nick.

  * * *

  Miles away, Nick lay awake, his arms folded behind his head. He imagined he could still feel Grace’s touch, smell the clean, pure scent of her, taste her kiss lingering on his lips.

  John Lombard had suggested Nick start working on clearing and fencing his land in the spare time he would have over the winter. The ranch would not get busy again until calving time in the spring. Oh, there would be things to do—rounding up strays wandering off in the snow, mending fences, the usual chores. But there would be time enough to maybe get a start on a cabin. He pictured something with a loft and room for a kitchen garden, somewhere to hang clothes to dry in the sun. But mostly, he pictured Grace in the kitchen or sitting with him by the fire or out in the courtyard—or lying in their bed.

  He swallowed a groan. His physical desire for her had become something that occupied his thoughts night and day. He wondered if it was the same for a woman. Did she want him? Did she think about lying with him as much as he did her?

  In the bunk next to him, Slim snored loudly, something Nick and the other men had grown used to sleeping through. But not tonight. Tonight, every little movement or sound seemed magnified. Finally, Nick gave up, stood, pulled on his trousers, shook out his boots in case of a scorpion or other critter, tugged them on, and walked outside.

  It was so quiet, as if the party had never happened. The sky was filled with stars. A horse whinnied. A night bird sang. Nick turned up the collar of his jacket, then closed his eyes, allowing the sounds of this land he loved so much to wash over him.

  After a while, he walked up to the barn, lit a lantern, and pulled out a notebook he used to keep count of the Lombard herd. He turned to a clean page and began to sketch out the cabin he would build—the cabin perhaps one day, he would be able to share with Grace.

  Chapter 8

  Grace saw Nick every night over the next two weeks. He sometimes came to her straight from the range, his clothes dusty and his skin musky with sweat. Sometimes, they would have only a few precious minutes before it was time for her to go, but he insisted one minute spent with her was worth hours of lost sleep. Whether they had the luxury of hours or only the moments they could steal before the church clock chimed ten, the evening always ended with the two of them finding a place in the shadows where they were unlikely to be seen or interrupted.

  Lily, it turned out, had been right. Their kisses grew more passionate, and it seemed only natural for things to progress beyond holding and being held to touching and being touched. It wasn’t long before they realized their place in the shadows no longer provided the cover they wanted for the passion that grew like a wildfire between them. One night, Nick had been waiting for her the minute she finished her shift, giving them over an hour to be together.

  “I found a place where we can be alone,” Nick said. “But, Grace, you need to be sure this is what you want.”

  “I am,” she assured him.

  He took hold of her hand and led her through the rear yard of the hotel, through an area littered with discarded roofing tiles and other building materials, to a dilapidated shed. The door hung loose on its hinges, and the single window had been covered over with paper. “It’s not much,” he said once they stepped inside, “but we’ll be out of the wind, and no one will bother us here.” He knelt and stacked kindling and wood in the corner fireplace.

  As the light from the fire unveiled the single room, Grace ignored the squalor and neglect and focused on a stack of burlap sacks. While Nick tended the fire, she took a few sacks, shook them out, and placed them on the dirt floor. She knelt next to him and ran her hand over his back. The shed might be shabby and barren, but the fire warmed her, and Nick was by her side. That was all she needed.

  The place was so small that they sat with their backs against one wall across from the fireplace, their legs outstretched and their arms around each other. Words seemed unnecessary as he leaned in to kiss her. Watching her for any objection, he unbuttoned her coat. When he cupped her breasts through the fabric of her dress, she gasped but did not pull away. Instead, she wondered how she might touch him in such a way that he might experience that same shock of longing he inspired in her.

  Every night, she hurried to change after her shift and slipped away, knowing Nick would be waiting. One night while he was kissing her, she tunneled her hands under his shirt and ran her palms over the smooth coolness of his bare skin. He stepped away, his breath ragged. “Do you know what you’re doing, Grace?”

  She hesitated, searching for words that could possibly explain the urges coursing through her body. “It feels right,” she replied.

  He unbuttoned his shirt. Now exposed from the waist up, he place
d her hands on his naked chest, the light of the fire playing over his muscles. She traced the outline of those muscles and watched as his pulse jumped in his throat.

  “Grace,” he whispered.

  He began undoing the buttons of her dress, pausing between each to give her the chance to stop him. But the truth was, she wanted to know what it might be like to feel him touch her as she was touching him, with no barriers of clothing. When he had opened the bodice to her waist, he tilted her face so that even in the dark, she was looking at him. The night was cold, but there was a heat between them that made them oblivious to the weather.

  “If we start down this road, Grace, we can’t go back,” he warned. “It’s your decision. It has to be. I want you in every way a man wants a woman, but I will not take any part of you without you agreeing.”

  “I want that. I want us.”

  And still, he stopped short of fully making love to her. When she urged him to go further, he shook his head and rolled away from her. “Not here, Grace. Not yet.”

  “But someday?” she whispered, deliberately repeating the promise they’d exchanged at the Lombard party.

  “Someday,” he agreed.

  One night as they sat holding each other and watching the dying embers of the fire, she nestled her face in the curve of his neck and said, “Nick, once I complete my contract, I’ve decided I’m not going back to Missouri. No matter what happens between us, this place and the people I’ve come to know feel more like home than the farm. That was my childhood home, but this…you…”

  The way his eyes widened with surprise and his smile spread like a rising sun, she knew he was pleased. “That changes everything, Grace,” he said as he ran his fingers through the tangle of her hair. “I mean, I didn’t want to push you, and I’ve been telling myself you might just decide your place was back there with your family. But if you stay, then we—” He pulled her close for a searing kiss.