Renewing Love

by Linda Ford

  Matt stared, his mouth open, his eyes wide. “She’s leaving them alone.” The words were filled with such pain that Eve’s throat tightened.

  Cole put a hand on Matt’s shoulder. “She isn’t abandoning them. She’s protecting them. Teaching them to hide from danger. As soon as we leave, and she doesn’t think there’s any danger, she’ll call them out.”

  Matt nodded. His throat worked.

  Cole squatted and caught the boy’s chin to pull his attention to him. “Matt, you’ve been hiding like those baby ducks, but even baby ducks know when it’s safe to come out.”

  Matt drank in every word. “How do they know it’s safe?”

  “If something happened to the mother duck, they would soon decide they must leave the bushes and learn how to live as ducks. Just like you decided it’s time to leave the trees and begin living like a boy should live.” Cole put his hands on the boy’s arms. “You are safe here. I promise it.”

  Matt’s eyes were awash. “All right.”

  Cole hugged the boy for a second. Matt remained stiff in his arms.

  Eve thought her heart would burst with her unshed tears.

  Matt ran toward the bushes and sat down, perhaps to wait and see what the ducklings would do.

  She went to Cole’s side. “You are very good with him.”

  He draped an arm about her shoulders and lowered his chin to her head. “I guess all those reminders of my childish fears prepared me to understand to some degree Matt’s fears.”

  “I’m glad he is going to have a home with you.”

  Cole pushed back the emotions of the last few minutes of dealing with Matt. The boy would do fine. He’d had those years of love and care from his parents. Cole intended to carry on from there.

  She’d said you, not us. Somehow he’d seen Eve as a partner in caring for Matt.

  He wanted her to stay. It had been almost two weeks. Perhaps no one would come from Ohio. Or he could simply ask her to stay. “You could have a hand in raising Matt.”

  She drew from his arm. “I’ll be in town.”

  His heart filled with cold. So that was her answer unless he could change her mind. “Eve—” His stomach rumbled.

  “You’re hungry. It’s time to eat.” She called Matt, and he raced back to where they’d left the food.

  Cole followed them. He would find a time and a way of convincing her to stay and be part of raising Matt.

  Would she consider being part of his dream? A forever home as man and wife.

  Maybe it was time for Cole to leave the shelter and step out into the water, just as he’d told Matt.

  They sat on the grass and ate thick sandwiches and handfuls of cookies.

  “Do you want to go back now?” he asked Ma.

  “No. I’m enjoying the sunshine far too much.” She bundled up a blanket and, using it as a pillow, lay back and closed her eyes.

  He helped Eve pack away the lunch things. “Let’s move on down the river so Ma and Alice can have a nap.”

  “You’re a good boy,” Ma said, without opening her eyes.

  Matt laughed, the sound making them all look at him. “She said you were a boy.” Then realizing they all stared at him, he raced away.

  “Sure sounds nice to hear him laugh,” Ma said.

  “Couldn’t agree more.” Cole looked at Eve. His heart kicked against his ribs at the approval in her eyes.

  He caught her hand, and they followed Matt along the river. They tossed rocks into the water. They watched crows fighting in midair. Matt stopped and pointed ahead. A deer and two fawns drank at the edge of the water. Cole held perfectly still, as did Eve and Matt, until the trio drank their fill and faded back into the trees.

  Matt came back to Cole’s side. “You ain’t always lived here, have you?”

  “No. I bought the place from Mr. Stanley about a month ago.”

  “Where was you before that?”

  He told of living farther north in the gold camp.

  “Did you like it?”

  Cole considered his words, not wanting to say anything the boy could take the wrong way. “I wouldn’t want to live there forever, but it served a purpose for the time.”

  “What was the purpose?” Seeing Matt wanted to talk, Cole and Eve sat on the grass. Matt sat facing them.

  “I wanted to make enough money to buy my own place.”

  “What if you didn’t?”

  Cole understood what the boy meant. “I’d work harder and dig more.”

  “How long were you there?”

  “Two years.”

  “Where did you live before?”

  “I lived and worked in Verdun taking care of a rich man’s animals and barns.”

  Matt shifted his attention, to Eve. “Are you going to live here too?”

  She darted a glance at Cole, then turned to Matt. “I’m only here to help Mrs. Carter for a few days.”

  “Then where you go?”

  “Back to Glory, where my family lives.”

  Matt sighed, and Cole wondered what was going through his head. “I wish things wouldn’t change.”

  That was the same reaction he’d gotten from Eve two years ago.

  “Change is hard,” she said. “But there comes a time that not changing is even harder. Maybe you’re at that place.”

  “Maybe.”

  Cole wanted to ask if Eve had reached that place. But now was not the time.

  They spent a pleasant couple of hours in the sunshine, then returned to Ma and Aunt Alice.

  “I’m ready to go back,” Ma said, and Cole lifted her into her wheelchair while Eve gathered up the picnic things. He pushed the chair up the hill, and the others followed.

  Back at the house, Ma called Eve. “I need your help.”

  Eve went to take care of her. When she returned, Matt said he had something to show them. Cole and Eve followed him out to the trees and down the path. They came to a dead end.

  “This is where I slept.”

  Cole saw no sign of a mat or flattened spot. Only a tangle of bushes and a copse of closely-knit trees. He saw the puzzlement on Eve’s face as she looked about.

  She looked overhead. “Did you sleep in the trees?”

  Matt looked pleased with himself. He lifted a branch of the bush to reveal a flattened spot. The only other sign of his presence was an empty Mason jar. He picked it up and handed it to Eve. “I’m sorry for stealing but I didn’t know what else to do.”

  Eve took the jar, her throat as dry as last year’s straw. “Matt, if I’d known I would have given you food.” She looked at the place where he slept. “This is very clever. I think you are smart boy.” She touched his shoulder, felt him quiver and, deciding to take the chance he wouldn’t run, she gave him a quick hug. “I’m so glad you don’t have to hide here anymore.” She stepped back before he got uncomfortable.

  “You smell like my mama.” He blinked and looked away.

  “That is the nicest compliment ever.” Her eyes filled with tears.

  Cole pulled her to his side.

  She shamelessly clung to his hand.

  “That’s all.” Matt trotted back down the trail toward the house.

  Neither Cole nor Eve moved.

  “His situation reminds me so much of me and Flora. We were alone and afraid. But only for a few days. I can’t imagine weeks of feeling that way.”

  Cole caught her to his chest. “I’m glad you were rescued. I’m glad we can help Matt.”

  She pressed her head to his shirt front, liking the strength she found there. “Me too.”

  He caught her chin and tipped her face toward him.

  Would he ask her to stay and help? “You’re very good with him.”

  “You are too.”

  She waited, but it seemed that was all he meant to say. Disappointment dripped into the depths of her being. Was she the only one feeling this attraction? What did she expect? They had both changed in the time they had been apart.

  “He might need more th
an I can give him,” he said

  His stomach rumbled. Laughing, she pulled from his embrace. “Is it time to eat again?”

  He patted his midsection. “My inner clock seems to think so.”

  “Then we better get back.”

  He led the way down the narrow path. The ladies were on the veranda, Matt perched on the edge, looking so at home that Eve’s smile trembled.

  This was how every child should feel.

  “Cole, we need you to open a crate for us,” Nancy said.

  Cole groaned. “More stories?”

  Matt jerked around to face them. “Stories?”

  “Obviously, I shouldn’t have said that word. Ma, let’s go see what you want.” He pushed her chair through the door. Alice followed.

  Matt looked at Eve.

  “Let’s see what they’re up to.”

  Matt scrambled to his feet and followed her.

  In the bedroom, Nancy pointed to a crate. “That’s the last one, so this has to be it.”

  Cole pried off the lid and stepped back as the ladies rushed forward.

  Alice pulled out a gray blanket. “There they are.” She lifted out a faded blue shirt that was worn at the cuffs and elbows and then a dark red one, equally worn. She and Nancy examined it.

  “Perfect,” they declared.

  Cole chuckled. “For rags maybe.”

  Ignoring him, Alice pulled out two pairs of trousers, one dark gray, the other a buff color, and held them up.

  “To think that Cole once fit these.” She shook her head and tsk-tsked.

  Eve chuckled. “Sounds to me like she’s blaming you for getting so big.”

  “She’s always blamed me.” His morose tone made her laugh again.

  “Turns out it’s a good thing. We can make the shirts over and adjust the pants for Matt.”

  Matt’s eyes widened. “For me?”

  Alice looked him up and down. “Can’t have you running around like that.”

  Matt drew back. “I’m fine.”

  Nancy caught his hand to keep him from fleeing. “You are indeed fine. A handsome lad and, as such, you deserve some handsome clothes. Besides, it will give us something useful to do. Will you let us fix these for you?”

  Matt hesitated about five seconds. “All right.”

  Alice held the pants up to Matt and moved them this way and that. She had him lift his arms, and she eyeballed their length. She turned him and pressed her hands to his back, nodding and muttering. “All right, young man. We’ll soon have you dressed the way you deserve.”

  Matt looked from Nancy to Alice. “Thank you.” He bent and gave Nancy a quick kiss on the cheek. Gave Alice a quick hug around her waist and dashed from the room.

  Nancy and Alice wiped tears from their eyes.

  Eve and Cole hurried after Matt.

  “I hope he doesn’t run away,” she whispered.

  Cole drew her from the room and pointed. Matt sat on the porch, looking away from the house.

  “Let him be,” Cole whispered.

  Eve began supper. By the time the food was ready, Matt had returned inside. If she wasn’t mistaken, there were tear tracks down his cheeks, but no one mentioned it. A content group sat around the table talking about the afternoon. Both Nancy and Alice were excited about the things they’d seen and planned stories and drawings from the outing.

  The meal over, Cole and Matt left to do chores.

  The kitchen was clean, and the ladies tucked into bed when Cole returned. Eve wondered if he’d spent all that time with Matt, or had he simply been delaying coming to the house?

  “Matt still prefers to sleep in the barn,” Cole said. “I hope he soon decides to spend his nights in the house. I’m going to make a cot and put it in my room and inform him it’s for him.” He snagged a chair with his foot and swung it about to straddle the seat and lean on the back. “Tomorrow is Sunday. I know you’d like to go to church and see your family, but I don’t think Matt is ready to face a crowd. Besides, he doesn’t have any decent clothes. And I don’t care to leave him alone at this point. Do you mind if we miss church yet again?”

  She would have liked to see her family and attend church but understood Cole’s concern about Matt. “I think it’s more important to be with Matt this Sunday.” Pa wouldn’t be concerned, because she’d informed him that Cole was away, and she didn’t know when to expect him home.

  “Don’t feel you have to work tomorrow,” Cole said.

  “You don’t care if you eat?” She managed to say the words with a touch of innocence and surprise.

  He looked shocked at the idea, then swallowed hard. “I’m sure we can survive on whatever we can find in the pantry.”

  She burst out laughing.

  He realized she was teasing and caught her hand to draw her to him. She stood against the back of the chair. He was forced to tip his head back to look at her, and it gave her a sense of control that she’d never before known with him. She touched his hair, brushing it back from his forehead. His irises darkened to midnight. White lines fanned out from his eyes. Their gazes held as if woven together by steel. Her heart beat a rapid tattoo against her ribs. She found herself drawn toward him, leaning over. His lips beckoned.

  No. She would not kiss him again. Not unless he confessed to some affection toward her and not just as good friends. She wanted more. She wanted to recapture what they had lost two years ago. No. She wanted even more than that. She wanted a complete trust and faith in each other.

  She wrinkled her nose and grinned as she pulled back. “I think I might manage to keep both you and Matt from starving to death.”

  His lungs emptied in a long sigh. “That is such a relief.”

  “If I do a little work tonight I won’t have to cook tomorrow.” Or at least the food would cook itself. She set navy beans to soak and mixed up the dry ingredients for soda bread. She’d let the beans bake all day, add the liquid ingredients to the soda bread, and put it in the oven in time for supper.

  Breakfast was easy enough, and for dinner, she would throw together whatever she could find and call it pantry soup.

  Cole got to his feet and pushed the chair to the table. “I’m off to bed.”

  She stared after him. His departure seemed rather abrupt. Perhaps he was simply tired.

  Or tired of her company? It was the same thought that had plagued her for days…weeks...months when he had so suddenly left for the gold fields.

  She’d allowed herself to think things had changed for the better, but did she only wish they had?

  Chapter 14

  Cole rose Sunday morning bursting with a need to move, to do something, to be active. He trotted to the barn to see Matt. Helped the boy brush hay from his hair. They filled the water trough for the horses. “I’m going to put a pump on the well,” he said. If it wasn’t Sunday, he’d go to town today, buy a pump, and put it up.

  Eve called, “Breakfast.”

  Matt was gone like a shot. Cole chuckled as he followed. He understood a bottomless hunger. It would take time for Matt to understand that there would be food when he needed it. Cole would see to that.

  “Wash up,” he told Matt inside the kitchen.

  “I know. My mama taught me.”

  “She’d be proud you remember.”

  Matt beamed. “I guess she would.”

  They sat around the table. As soon as Cole said grace, they passed the food. Eve had made oat porridge and a stack of griddle cakes. Matt consumed his fair share of both as did Cole.

  Ma and Aunt Alice said nothing about attending church. Eve must have informed them.

  Breakfast over, Matt rocked back and forth on his chair. Cole felt like doing the same thing but settled for tipping back on two legs.

  Ma looked from Matt to Cole. “Seems to me you two would be better off finding amusement outside.”

  Matt waited for Cole to move. He did so slowly, though inside, he rejoiced that his mother had given him permission to leave. He chuckled as he headed fo
r the door. As if he needed his mother’s say-so to do something. “We’ll be in the barn.” He jammed his hat on his head and lengthened his strides as Matt ran ahead to the barn and shoved open the door.

  “What we gonna do, Cole?”

  “We’re going to make you a bed to go in my room.”

  Matt scuffed his feet in the dust. When Cole went to town for the pump, he’d buy Matt boots.

  “Do I have to sleep in the house?”

  “The rest of us do. I expect you did when your mama and papa were alive, and I’d really like some company in my bedroom. But, Matt, you decide when you’re ready.”

  “All right.”

  “Now let’s see what we can find for making a bed.” There was a stack of lumber in the back of the barn, and they went there. He held up a piece. “What do you think?”

  With much assessment and discussion, they chose each piece of wood, cut the right lengths, and nailed together a frame.

  “Do you want to take it in the house now or leave it here?”

  “Could I practice sleeping on it out here?”

  “Excellent idea. But you’ll need a mattress.”

  He stared at Cole. “I’ve been sleeping on the ground.”

  “Then I guess you’ll be happy with a straw tick.”

  Cole knew there was an empty tick in one of the crates. They went back to the house to find it, then returned to the barn and filled it with sweet-smelling hay—a large improvement over pokey straw.

  “Where do you want it?”

  Matt looked around and chose an empty stall farthest from the door. Cole helped him place the bed there. Matt sat on the mattress and looked around. “I’ll be all right here.”

  It was more of a question than a statement. Cole sat beside him. “If you’re worried about being safe, you should sleep in the house. I’d be right beside you.”

  Matt studied him. The hunger in his eyes almost undid Cole, but he held the boy’s gaze, letting him find the safety and security Cole offered.

  Matt looked away. “This is good.”

  “Dinner.” Eve’s voice came across the distance.

  Cole jumped to his feet at the same time as Matt. “I wonder what she’s made?” the boy asked as he trotted to the house.