Craving Control (Black Shamrocks MC Book 6)

by Kylie Hillman

  She screws her eyes shut to block me out. I slap her face until she reopens them. I want her to see the pain she’s caused. I want her to see the real me.

  Glaring at her, I snarl, “I’m sure you thought you got away with it, but I saw everything. I saw you dancing like a slut with him, making a fool of me in front of everyone. You're lucky that your stepmother asked me to help her because I was ready to kill him for touching you. You got lucky then, but your luck’s run out now. I'm going to punish you. Teach you how to behave like a proper woman, not the whore you were raised to be.”

  Maddi closes her eyes again and turns her face away from me. The delicate skin at her neck calls to me. I lean over her and run my tongue from her collarbone all the way up the side of her face, tasting her, taunting her, tearing down the protective wall she’s trying to build around her mind to block out my onslaught.

  When she pulls away, I follow. Sinking my teeth into her bottom lip, I pierce the skin and finally, finally, finally, taste her blood. It’s everything I imagined and more. I suck her lip, greedily stealing every last drop I can. A potent sense of possession overwhelms me.

  I have won.

  He might have kissed her first, but I’ve sampled her true essence.

  He has her blood on his hand right now, my demon rears his ugly head to remind me of my earlier failure.

  Memories of Maddi’s blood staining the fingers of that biker trash hit me hard. It reinvigorates my rage and sends me spiralling headfirst into punishment mode.

  There will be no more toying with her.

  It’s time for Madelaine O’Brien to pay.

  Releasing her arms from beneath my knees, I pin them above her head.

  "Do you think his cock’s bigger than mine? Is that why you're trying to leave me?”

  She refuses to answer me, instead meeting my questions with demands of her own. “Just stop this. Let me go. NOW!”

  "Not going to happen.” I sink my teeth into her shoulder and bite down hard.

  She shudders.

  “My Lainey.”

  I bite her again.

  She swallows her pain, accepting it silently and denying me the full impact of my revenge.

  “My angel.”

  This time I bite a tad harder and accidentally break her skin with my teeth. It works. She can’t hold back any longer. Maddi squeals at the top of her lungs. She gasps for air and writhes beneath me.

  “I'm going to show you how wrong you are,” I promise. “My cock will fill every inch of your sexy little body, and you'll love it.”

  I bite her nipple, purposely breaking the skin. A drop of blood runs down her side.

  “No. I said no. Please stop,” she whimpers.

  Squeezing my cheeks with one hand, I pull her face closer to mine. “You don't get to say no. You're mine. I can do what I like to you, when I like.”

  As I search her face for clues as to why she wants to hurt me so much, I see Maddi doing the same thing to me. The fear in her gaze seems permanent, yet I can’t find any sign that she’s actually sorry for what she’s done. All I see is my damnation in the crude calculation that simmers just below the surface. Maddi still believes she will find a way out of this by reasoning with me or pleading to my sensibilities.

  Why can’t she see that I’m not going to let her go?

  The only thing that will separate us permanently is death.

  “Don't you understand that I can give you so much more than he can? I've got money and class. I have manners. I'm educated, and I come from an elite family. I can make you someone. I can take you anywhere, give you anything you want. He can't give you anything. He's worthless.”

  “You're insane. None of that matters to me.” Maddi launches into her argument before I’ve stopped speaking. My attempts to explain are pointless—she refuses to hear me out. “You need to stop right now. My father’s going to kill you if you do this.”

  I laugh in her face. If she knew how much her father wanted her with me, she’d reconsider her choice of threats. Not that it matters—I have irrefutable evidence that will destroy her twin if she pushes me too far.

  “You aren’t going to tell anyone anything, Lainey,” I state, plainly. “You do, and I’ll email every journalist in Australia pictures of Benji smoking a glass pipe. They’ll love pictures of the number one draft pick smoking meth; don’t you think?”

  “You don't have—” She doesn’t finish her sentence.

  “I most definitely do, Lainey.”

  Her expressive features telegraph the exact moment the truth hits her. She turns white, and her body is wracked with tremors.

  For good measure, I rub a little extra salt in her wound. “You’re going to be a good girl now, aren’t you? You're going to stop fighting me and make this a proper relationship. If you don’t, I'm going to ruin everyone you love. One at a time. Starting with your junkie twin.”

  She shakes her head.

  I tsk. “You’ll learn the hard way to do what I say.”

  Securing her hands with one of mine, I undo her jeans. She tries to stop me, but it proves futile for her once again. I’m stronger, heavier, and more determined.

  She doesn’t stand a chance.

  I rip the denim down her legs, then sit back on my haunches to admire the sight before me. Maddi is beautiful. Lush perfection. She emanates an innocence that’s at odds with her overtly sexual curves.

  “No panties, Lainey … I knew you were a slut deep in your cold, virginal heart.” I smirk. She recoils from my words. “There's no way someone with a body like yours could really be the frigid bitch you pretend to be.”

  Holding her tight, I take my time finishing my perusal before I settle myself between her legs. I push my erection against her, knowing full well that the rough material of my pants will scratch and pinch her virgin flesh. She pulls away. Shoving a hand between her legs, I make a mockery of the pleasure I could bring her if I wanted to.

  I don’t. Tonight is mine. My revenge. My reckoning. My retribution.

  My touch is cruel when I rub her clit. I spread her legs further and force a finger inside. Maddi bites back a yelp at my intrusion, and I pay her back for denying me her voice by pumping my finger inside her until she can’t contain herself any longer. When she eventually whimpers, I cease tormenting her, bringing my finger to my mouth and sampling her elixir.

  “You taste like honey.”

  She shudders, then looks away.

  I loosen my hold enough to unbutton my chinos, making quick work of kicking them off behind me. As usual, I’m commando. My cock is hard. Ready to see the inside of his new home. When Maddi returns her attention to me, I touch myself. Her fear kicks up another notch when she sees me in all my glory. It flows from her in waves that feel like cool summer rain on my skin.

  Fisting my cock, I work it up and down while I mentally catalogue every inch of Maddi’s naked body. Calm determination floods my veins and I breathe deep, relaxing my mind now that I’m certain victory can’t be snatched from me at the last minute.

  Like a little bitch, Maddi refuses to resign herself to the inevitable. She has to mount one last, hopeless fight, by kicking out at me while I’m not paying attention. I dodge her leg easily but slap her face anyway. She tries to close her legs and I punch her in the ribs twice, once for her inability to accept defeat, and the second time just because I liked the sound she made when I hit her the first time.

  Smiling down at her, I push my cock against her heat. She looks like she’s about to be sick and it gladdens my heart. This should make her ill. She should be ashamed about how she’s treated our relationship. She should be on all fours begging me to take her after the way she acted tonight. She should be apologising for making me fight her every step of the way.

  It will take time, yet I know in my heart that we will get through this together.

  After all there’s no going back now.

  “No, Brendan. Please don't do this,” Maddi begs.

  Refraining from rol
ling my eyes at her ongoing dramatics, I settle for shaking my head instead.

  I surge forward, the head of my cock barely breaching her entrance. Maddi allows me one small moment of calm before she begins screaming like a banshee and fighting me with all she has left. Her pointless struggle brings a smile to my face and I lightly wrestle her, letting her squirm and kick, bite and punch, scratch and pinch whatever part of my body she can reach.

  Every time she elicits pain, my smile grows wider.

  This is how I wanted her to react—this is how I want them all the react.

  Fight me. Make me work to fuck you. I almost wish I could dig up the dead hooker from wherever dad had her buried, so I can show her how a real woman should react. None of her timid bullshit. There’s no way I could accidentally choke Maddi to death—she would battle me to the very end.

  Maddi’s heel makes contact with my hip, the shock loosening my grip, and she scrambles away. She’s was a little too close to my dick for comfort, now she’s a little too out of my control for my liking, and the loss of her tells me it’s time to get my head back in the game.

  Winding her long hair around my wrist, I stop her escape. She reaches back to take some of the strain off her scalp and I slap her across the face. Her whimper sends sparks of desire shooting down my spine. I maintain my hold on her hair, bending her neck at an awkward angle before I toss her on her back again. She has no choice, except to open her legs once my hips are fully wedged between, although she tries her hardest to clench them shut anyway. I force them open with my free hand, then grasp my cock and guide him home.

  I thrust forward, slamming into her tight channel with one harsh motion.

  “Argh—It hurts—Stop! Please…” Maddi screams.

  She writhes beneath me, unwittingly encasing me deeper inside her.

  I hold still, my breathing coming hard just from the feel of her pussy gripping me. For half a minute, I luxuriate in the sensations she wrings from me with her squirming.

  “You feel so good, Lainey. So tight you hurt me. You’re so warm and snug. I love that I'm the only man to have ever been inside you. This is perfect.”

  Maddi falls still. A shudder runs the length of her body, and she bursts into tears. I lick them from her cheeks and pump my hips against her.

  “I’m gonna make you scream my name until it’s the only one you can remember.” I vow. “You’re mine … can’t you feel it?”

  She cries harder. I test her again, flexing my hips and groaning when I discover that her body has adjusted to the intrusion of my cock. Her wet heat splinters my control, and a bunch of truths—threats, promises, vows, and explanations—spill from my lips.

  “Don’t cry, baby girl. This is what we should have been doing all along. I let you think you had control of our relationship for too long. You started thinking that you’re better than you are. Look at you…you’re nothing special. You should be thankful I invest my time in you. I could do so much better.”

  Maddi refuses to meet my eyes. I take hold of her face and make her look at me while I maintain my mid-tempo thrusting.

  “You’re my slut. My whore. You think your biker is going to want you once I’m finished with you? No one will want you. Only me. You’re mine. Forever.”

  Her eyes roll back in her head before her eyelids flutter shut. I tighten my grip on her hair and pick up the pace. I feel her inner muscles clench around me, then she tries to fight me again. It’s useless. She’s tiring, her efforts resembling a mosquito attacking a Brahman bull, and all it takes to quieten her into submission is the occasional swat or tug of her hair.

  I don’t see any blood, the ugly voice in my head returns. She’s not even screaming.

  Maddi’s eyes fly open when I stop thrusting and pull most of the way out of her.

  Blind hope that it’s over fills her eyes.

  I disabuse her of the notion with some choice words. “Now, darling girl. That was the nice part. I let you have it since it’s your first time, not that you deserved it after your behaviour tonight. I hope you enjoyed it because now I'm going to punish you for humiliating me.”

  Angling my cock, I slam back into her enough power to force her body up the tray of the truck. When she gets too far from me, I use her hair to pull her back. When it happens again, I remove one hand from her wrists and anchor her to me by curling that arm under her shoulder. Now, the intensity of my thrusting is maintained, and Maddi can no longer lessen the impact. I use savage measured strokes, punishing her over and over until I feel the final vestiges of her fight leave.

  She screws her face up. Her agony is clear to see.

  There’s only one thing I need to truly satisfy me.

  “Scream for me, Lainey, my beautiful slut,” I chant in time with my pumping hips. “My whore. Scream as loud as you can.”

  Maddi tries to get away from me. She can’t. I have her where I want her and there’s no escaping until I’ve had my fill. That doesn’t stop her from trying, tears of frustration spilling down her cheeks.

  Every now and then, I sample her liquid tribute to my dominance. Each time I do, I watch a little more of her spirit die. It won’t be long now. She’s not far from breaking.

  She will lose this fight.

  And when she does, I will find my salvation.

  Eventually, loud, feral howls of agony are ripped from her until she’s hysterically screaming over and over. I smile, my heart healed by her devastation and my monster satisfied with her recompense. Letting go of her wrists, I curl my other arm under her previously free shoulder and chase my release. Her arms hang limply. She lies there—body, mind, and spirit shattered—as I drive cock into her with seemingly impossible speed and wild intensity.

  Planting kisses on her mouth and neck, I lick her tears and bite her lips. My balls draw tight, the telltale tingle in the base of my spine growing into a wave of ecstasy.

  My release approaches like a steam train. I rest my forehead on hers and fall over the edge into the dark abyss in my mind where only I can go—a valley filled with Maddi’s willing love and my ability to keep my monster under control.

  Two impossibilities I know I’ll never really hold in my hand during my life.

  “I love you, Lainey.” I moan as her body milks the final drops of my orgasm out of me. “You’re mine and only mine.”

  Satiated, I roll off her, dropping onto my back and resting an arm over my eyes. My body is completely relaxed for the first time in my memory, and I know I’m going to sleep well tonight.

  Maddi lies next to me, panting and gasping. I listen to her breathing, a tiny shard of guilt ripping a hole in the protective layer off my mind. Maybe, I shouldn’t have been so rough with her?

  It had felt right at the time—appeasing my demon and releasing my frustrations on her.

  Next time, I vow, I’ll treat her with more kindness.

  Next time, I silently promise, she’ll come for me.

  Next time, I’ll show her how much I care.

  Maddi sits up. She wraps her arms around her knees and rocks in place.

  “Going somewhere, Lainey?” I ask, pushing myself upright and sliding my arms around her.

  She tenses, but I chase away her fear with a kiss on her forehead.

  Yes—next time will be about her needs.

  “I’m spent, my darling girl so I’m heading inside,” I say with a smile. “Why don’t you go home, and I’ll see you for lunch tomorrow.”

  She follows my lead and re-dresses herself. My movements are leisurely while Maddi seems to be rushing. I pick up the pace, so I can kiss her goodbye, but somehow, she manages to climb over the edge and run to the front seat of my truck before I’ve even buttoned my pants.

  She grabs her bag and roughly closes the door. In the fading illumination from the interior light of my truck, I walk to the edge and watch her dash for her car.

  Her departure doesn’t sit right with me. I place my hands on my hips and call after her, “Remember that I love you, Lainey. We
’re staying together no matter what you say. You aren't going to like what happens if you forget what I said. Think about Benji. Think about Lachie. Think about everyone you love and imagine what I can do to them.”

  She slams her door shut and speeds off without another word.

  I’m left shaking my head and wondering if I’ll ever understand women, at all.

  Treat them nicely, they run around making a fool of you.

  Punish them for stepping out of place, and they run away from you like you’re the devil.

  I guess time will tell which set of circumstances Madelaine O’Brien prefers.

  TWENTY-ONE

  “I'm still with him,” Maddi finally admits the truth.

  From my position outside the study at the O’Brien house, I listen to their conversation. Mik Kennedy has been mooning after her all afternoon, trailing her like a love-sick puppy while Maddi has done her best to avoid him. When he’d cornered her about ten minutes ago, I’d thought about bursting and separating them. That was until my curiosity got the better of me and I decided to wait to see how she handled him.

  So far, she’s kept him in the dark about the dirt I have on Benji.

  I don’t know if her abrupt change in behaviour was caused by the persuasion offered by my cock or if it was the text messages I sent afterward that convinced her, all I know is that Maddi has been the perfect girlfriend all day, and the leftover pain from her betrayal yesterday has nearly receded.

  Today has been a good day.

  “I'm sorry, Mik, so sorry.”

  I hear quick footsteps, so I shuffle around to get a better look. Maddi has gone to Mik and taken hold of his arm. Grinding my teeth, I’m about to give into my urge to get between them when he loses his temper.