Broken Wings 2 - Midnight Flight

by Andrews, V. C.

  “Take her to the house yourselves then,” she ordered, and stepped aside.

  We walked on, struggling because Teal was doing less and less to move herself now. Despite the effort, both Robin and I reached down into some reservoir of energy, fueled by our anger, our hate, our indignation, by years and years of our pain and suffering. We stumbled and nearly fell. The buddies roared with laughter, then, suddenly, I could hear Natani's drum. Robin heard it, too. We looked at each other and found the strength to cross that yard to the front of the hacienda.

  As we continued, I kept my eyes forward, never wavering, so I didn't see or know if Gia and Mindy were watching us. When we stood at the steps, the front door opened, and Dr. Foreman, dressed in a cool, mint green skirt suit, her face freshly made up with a brighter lipstick and even some eye shadow, looked down at us and smiled.

  “Oh, I just knew you would do well. I just knew you had it in you to be cooperative, unselfish, and resilient. My girls, my Foreman girls, always come through for me, for themselves. What a wonderful day,” she cried.

  Was she blind? Could she not see that Teal was practically comatose and we were standing on legs held up only by sheer determination?

  “Teal was bitten by a sidewinder,” I said. “She's delirious.”

  “And you knew what to do, I see,” Dr. Foreman replied, still not moving to help us. “Natani's lessons. How fortunate that you paid attention. Imagine if you paid attention in regular school as well. Maybe now you will. See?” she asked as if in that simple question she justified this whole experience, her techniques and theories and all that was done to us in the name of recovery.

  “Teal is very sick,” I replied in a dry, stiff voice.

  She blinked rapidly, but held that cold, egotistical smile I had come to hate, to have dreams about shattering.

  “She'll recover,” she said, “and she'll be better for it.”

  “Have you been bitten by a sidewinder?” I fired back at her.

  “Don't be insubordinate.” She nodded at the buddies. “Take Teal to the infirmary immediately.”

  M'Ladies One and Two moved forward and lifted Teal from our shoulders. Then they scooped her under her legs and carried her up the stairway. Dr. Foreman stepped aside and opened the door for them.

  “Are we home?” I heard Teal ask.

  “Yes,” M'Lady One said, and laughed.

  The door closed behind them and Dr. Foreman turned back to us. “I want the two of you to shower and change back into your coveralls and wait for further instructions in your bunkhouse. You may rest while you wait.” She turned and walked into the house before either Robin or I could say another thing to her.

  “Let's go, girls,” M'Lady Three said.

  We turned and crossed the yard to the showers. Both of us were actually looking forward to the cold shower. We couldn't swallow enough water and it felt wonderful on our bodies. Soaping up, scrubbing our hair, revived us both.

  “Enough, girls. Move it,” M'Lady Three shouted.

  I looked for Mindy and Gia and didn't see either of them in the gardens or the pigpen. We slipped on our shorts and blouses and battered sneakers before going to the barn bunkhouse. Both of us stopped dead on entering.

  Our three cots had been stripped of their mattresses, blankets, and pillows. Our coveralls and old blouses were on them and our clodhopper shoes beside them.

  “Why?” I asked, turning to M'Lady Three.

  She shrugged. “You had demerits. You have to earn what you get, remember?”

  “This stinks. It's unfair!” Robin cried.

  “Welcome to the real world. You have to learn how to deal with unfairness. Not that this was unfair. Rest up, girls. You'll need it, believe me,” she said, and left.

  “Look,” Robin said, nodding at Gia's and Mindy's bunks. Mindy's was stripped down as well. “I wonder what she did to deserve her unfairness.”

  “I don't care anymore,” I said. “I'm too tired to care about anything, even this.”

  I went to my bunk and swept the coveralls and blouse off. Then I thought again and rolled them up to use as a pillow. Robin nodded and did the same.

  In minutes, we were both dead to the world, asleep. Soon after, however, we were poked and prodded until we woke up. M'Ladies Two and One were there with notebooks in their hands, the same sort we had been given at orientation.

  “You've slept enough, girls. Dr. Foreman wants you both to start on your journals. She wants you both to write about your experience out there and what you have learned from it. She expects details and honesty,” M'Lady One said, and handed me a notebook with a pen.

  Robin was handed hers as well. We both just stared blankly at the notebooks.

  The buddies smiled, then left.

  “She must be kidding,” Robin said.

  “I strongly doubt it,” I said.

  “I can't keep my eyes open, much less write something.”

  We looked at each other and came up with the same cry: “What more can she do to us?”

  I put the notebook down and sprawled out again. Robin did the same and we were asleep almost as quickly as we were the first time. We slept well into the late afternoon and woke this time when we heard the door open.

  Gia stood there looking at us. I sat up quickly.

  “Gia. Where's Mindy?” I asked, seeing she was alone.

  “Mindy's gone.”

  “Gone?” Robin asked, sitting up. “You mean she was sent home?”

  “No, I mean gone.” Gia walked to her cot. She sat, staring down at the floor. I looked at Robin and then rose and walked over to Gia.

  “What happened to her, Gia?”

  She looked up at me. "I couldn't stop her. She used the scythe Natani had us use to cut the high grass. I was working and suddenly realized she was no longer in the field. She had been strange all morning after a session with Dr. Foreman. She wouldn't tell me anything about it, but I could see she was very upset, more upset than ever. I kept asking her about it, trying to find out something, some reason for her deep depression.

  "Finally, she muttered something about never going home and how it was her fault.

  "I tried to get more information to help her, but she clammed up and just went to work with me in the field. As I said, I was working and thinking and not paying attention to anything and then suddenly realized she was no longer there.

  “So, I went looking for her and found her in the barn, sitting on the floor. She had taken the sharpest scythe and she had cut both her wrists very deeply. There was so much blood already, but she was smiling at me. I shouted for help, of course. No one was around, so I ran to find Natani, but he wasn't there either.”

  “That's because he was out there helping us,” I said, looking at Robin. She nodded. “What happened then?”

  "I tried to stop the bleeding, but that was impossible. She said, 'Leave me be. I was wrong. I'm going home.'

  "So I ran out again and went to the house where I found Dr. Foreman lecturing our buddies in her office. She demanded to know why I had entered the house without permission. She stood there screaming at me. Finally, I managed to tell them about Mindy and they ran out to the barn.

  “I saw them carry her off, but I knew it was too late. Later, the van took her away. I saw them carrying her out of the house. This afternoon,” she continued after a long beat of silence, “I think Dr. Foreman was to meet with the police. Did you see how nice she looked?” she asked as if that really mattered to any of us. “She'll make it look like an accident.”

  “How horrible,” Robin said.

  “You know what was done to us, how we were left out there in the desert?” I asked.

  “I know.” She looked up at us. “I didn't expect you would make it back.”

  “Natani helped us. That's why he wasn't here when you needed him,” I said.

  “She's going to get away with it,” Gia said. “She got away with Posy. She'll get away with all this, too.”

  “Maybe the police are sti
ll here or someone from the social service agency. Maybe we can talk to them,” Robin suggested excitedly.

  “No,” Gia said. "They're gone. She did her good job on them, I'm sure. We're high-​risk girls, you see. Anything can happen and it's not going to be her fault. Look at all the girls she's helped, the ones she's released back into society to be productive citizens. Once in a while, she loses one. It can't be helped. The girl was beyond redemption. I know her whole speech. I've heard it before. I've heard it all my life, that speech. How terrible I am. How beyond help. How selfish. How downright no good.

  “Sound familiar?” she asked us.

  “Not as much maybe, but I've heard it, yes,” Robin admitted.

  I thought about my uncle and aunt and how they saw me. “Me, too.”

  “Won't Mindy's family be upset, angry, demand answers?” Robin wondered.

  “The family that failed, that gave up? Please,” Gia said. “They'll feel sorrier for Dr. Foreman. They'll even apologize for giving her a girl she couldn't cure.”

  “She's more dangerous than we'll ever be,” I said, “because she gets them to believe she does it all out of some desire to be good.”

  “Exactly.” Gia looked past me at the cot. “I see you were given the notebook to fill. I have one, too.” She reached under her pillow to show it to us. “I'm to write about what I learned from Mindy's failure.”

  Gia put it aside and looked at us again, finally realizing Teal wasn't there.

  “Where is Teal?”

  I told her what had happened and where she was.

  “She'll take good care of her,” Gia said. “She might even have her transported to a real hospital or something. She can't afford to lose another girl so quickly.”

  “She almost lost all three of us out there.”

  “That's different. You ran off. You were beyond her help, her ability to do anything. If you didn't show up, she would have called the police and covered her rear end. Don't worry about Dr. Foreman. She's invincible,” Gia said.

  She lay back and looked up at the ceiling, her hands folded on her stomach.

  “What do we do?” I asked. Robin shook her head.

  “Nothing,” Gia said. “Go write in your notebooks. I have mine half-​filled.”

  “I'll write something. What I write will make her ears burn,” Robin threatened.

  Gia smiled. “Good idea. That's what I'm doing.”

  We had no idea what she meant.

  But we would.

  Soon.

  We would.

  Broken Wings 2 - Midnight Flight

  Posy Returns

  J. eal wasn't sent to any real hospital. Natani's Indian medicine worked well. After another two days, she appeared at the barracks, weakened, but essentially well enough to be on her own again with just a little limp in her walk. The snake bite and the events afterward appeared to have erased most of her memories of our desert ordeal. Robin and I had to describe it all to her, and as we did, she kept shaking her head and saying, “I did that? We did that?”

  Apparently she had been in more of a daze and in more confusion than we'd realized after she had been bitten by the sidewinder.

  Apparently because of her condition, Dr. Foreman did not give her a notebook to fill with thoughts and lessons learned. Neither Robin nor I had really done much in ours, but we were told we would not be given back our mattresses, blankets, and pillows until we had completed the notebooks.

  I was afraid of writing anything truthful, afraid that somehow Dr. Foreman would find a way to use it against me, use it as a weapon to tear me down, just as she had done with my revelation about my fear of rats. Gia was writing in hers, but we had no idea what she wrote. She wouldn't reveal it. She just kept mumbling, “I'll remind her. I'll remind her.”

  One of the first things I did when I had free time was to thank Natani. He said nothing, admitting to nothing until I described how I had found my shell and used it to help get me through the ordeal.

  “So now I shall no longer call you daughter of the sun. You are daughter of the tortoise,” he said, and came the closest to laughing with me.

  “You shouldn't stay here, Natani. This is a mean and ugly place. You don't belong here.”

  “I must stay with my plants, my animals, my trees. We look after each other. Someday, daughter of the tortoise, you will learn that the Earth Mother is your true friend and the only home you will have.”

  “I think I learned that already, Natani. Thanks again for what you did for us.”

  He nodded and smiled. “You did well with what you learned.”

  Because of our near exhaustion and what we had endured, we weren't given heavy, long labor during the first few days after our return. Most of my day was spent helping Natani with the horses, work I had come to love. One afternoon, Natani asked me if I would like to learn how to ride Wind Song. I was terrified of the idea, but he told me I was ready and Wind Song approved. I had little doubt that he could speak to horses.

  Natani showed me how to ride bareback. His first instruction was to mount Wind Song from the left side. Even at his age, he was nimble enough to leap and swing his leg over Wind Song's back. I tried it and failed miserably, probably because I was too frightened. Finally, he boosted me up and I swung my leg over. It was not exactly the most comfortable place to be, but Natani said I needed to relax and believe in myself, and if I did, it would be like riding on a cloud.

  “Be one with Wind Song. He will know if you feel like a stranger. He will not expect it or like it if you don't join with him,” Natani advised.

  I put my hand on Wind Song's powerful neck and he shook his head and then tapped the ground with his right hoof.

  “He says hello,” Natani told me.

  “Hello, Wind Song,” I replied.

  Natani handed me the reins, which he wanted me to take in my left hand first.

  “Never let go of the reins,” he said. “It is how you talk to Wind Song, to tell him which way to turn and when to stop. He is rein trained.” Natani showed me how to lay the reins on Wind Song's left side to turn him right and vice versa.

  "Do not pull back when you are standing still. He will think you want to go back. Hold the reins like a bird: too tight and you will choke it, too loose and it will fly away, daughter of the tortoise.

  “Wind Song likes you, but he will want to ride you and not you ride him. It is natural to him. He is a proud animal, full of spirit, so be firm with your movements. You must feel his moves, and when he starts to turn where you don't want him to turn, stop him, because once he is into it, it will be hard to make him change his mind.”

  “Do I say giddap?” I asked.

  Natani smiled and shook his head. “You watch too many cowboy-​and-​Indian movies. You press firmly with your heels into his sides when you want him to go forward. Don't worry about hurting him. You won't, but he will know you are serious if you press firmly. Bounce with him, daughter of the tortoise.” Natani then slapped Wind Song on the rump and he started around the corral.

  Bounce I did and I came down too hard and fast. Natani told me I was being too stiff. I knew I had to hide my fear, but it was hard. Finally, I discovered that Natani was right: If I relaxed, it was less difficult and I didn't bounce as hard. I softened and I could feel I was riding better and better. After a few more trots, Wind Song stopped as if he was testing me, and Natani urged me to move him ahead. I did so, firmly kicking with my heels. He began to trot again and Natani shouted for me to practice turning him.

  “Firmly, firmly,” Natani called to me. “Do everything to show him you mean it.”

  It was easier than I had expected, and soon I began to enjoy it. I even turned him sharply, then started around again just to see if I could make him do that. My courage was building with every minute I rode.

  Look at me, I thought. Look at me. Who on the street in Atlanta would believe Phoebe Elder would be riding a horse bareback?

  On my next turn, I saw M'Lady One standing next to the
fence. She was smiling, but it wasn't a friendly, happy-​for-​me smile. It was impish. I looked to Natani, but he didn't see her.

  As we drew closer, she leaned over the fence. “Having a good time, Phoebe bird?”

  I was about to say yes when she flicked a cigarette lighter, one of those that had a knob permitting you to increase the flame. Wind Song caught sight of it and reared sharply to his left, whipping into a gallop. I tried holding him back, but he was excited and afraid. I thought he was actually going to try to leap over the fence, but he stopped short and raised his forelegs. I lost my grip and slid off his back, splashing down into the horse manure.

  M'Lady One, now joined by the other two buddies, roared with laughter. Wind Song trotted away and stared at me, snorting, brushing the ground with his right hoof like a bull about to charge. Then Natani entered the corral and walked toward him. He held out his hand and placed it on the horse's head. For a moment Wind Song looked like he would throw it off, but he didn't. He calmed down and stood still, his tail slapping at flies again.

  “I guess she's a born rider, huh, Natani?” M'Lady One called.

  Natani said nothing. He helped me up and I started to brush off.

  “It's lonesome in the saddle since my horse died,” M'Lady Two sang, and the three of them walked away laughing.

  Natani stared after them, his eyes dark. Then he tilted his head as if he heard something and looked off to the right where some clouds slid beside each other, the bellies of them all dark.

  “She flicked a lighter, Natani. She frightened Wind Song.”

  He nodded. “I saw.” He continued to stare out at the clouds. “The wind is angry. There will be thunder inside us. That will be enough for today.”

  What does that mean? I wondered. I stood there and watched as he led Wind Song back to the stables. I was so angry and frustrated. Maybe that was what he meant by the thunder inside us. There was enough inside me to cause a flood, but all I did was mumble curses under my breath as I went to the showers to clean off the manure as best I could.