Desiring Dorothy

by Albertson, Alana

We didn’t speak another word for the rest of the trip. Once the GPS signaled, we were a mile away of Dorothy and Crow’s location, I pulled over.

  “We are going to walk for the rest of the way. I have water and food. Remain quiet. We will watch Dorothy from afar.”

  He didn’t fight me on it which was refreshing. We began to walk across the barren land until I saw an old farmhouse in the distance. I took out my binoculars and peered into them.

  There were Dorothy and Crow, sitting inside the house, talking to a blonde woman.

  Lev whispered to me. “Now what?”

  “Now, we watch Dorothy’s every move.”

  14

  Dorothy

  “Are you sure we can trust her?” Brandon whispered to me under his breath as we followed Aunt Glinda back inside the house. The expression on his face said he was hesitant to trust anyone at this point.

  With good reason after what we’d been through.

  I started to say yes, but then I reconsidered. So many people had hurt me recently, and I hadn’t let myself get close to anyone after Uncle Henry died. I’ve known her all my life. Theoretically, I should be able to trust her.

  If Uncle Henry hadn’t been killed, I wouldn’t have second-guessed myself, but now everything was different. I couldn’t be a hundred percent sure about anyone.

  I glanced at Brandon. As much as I wanted to trust him, maybe I needed to be careful around him, too. He was kind and understanding, even after all we had been through, but I still didn’t know him that well and my gut instinct told me there was more to his dumb farmer routine.

  “I think so but be on guard just in case.”

  Aunt Glinda held the front door open, and I smiled at her, though it was forced.

  Brandon followed close behind me, so close Aunt Glinda gave us a side-eyed glance, but she didn’t comment. Perhaps he could feel the tension that filled me so completely at being back in Kansas.

  “Well,” Aunt Glinda said and sat on a new loveseat, “to what do I owe the pleasure? Don’t get me wrong, I’m tickled to see you. I didn’t know you were back in Kansas. I thought you were doing remote work. Where was it again?”

  “The Arctic,” I answered. We sat on the couch opposite Aunt Glinda, and I almost expected Toto to come careening down the hallway.

  Toto. I missed him so goddamn much. He’d been a gift for my eighteenth birthday from Aunt Glinda.

  I wondered if I’d ever even see him again.

  I was starting to think I wouldn’t.

  “What brings you back?” she asked.

  I glanced at Brandon, who sent me a bolstering look, then squeezed my leg. The warmth of his hand gave me a shot of courage and I said, “I was wondering if Uncle Henry left anything here for me. Anything that he thought I should have, maybe? I’m sorry if this doesn’t make any sense. It’s complicated.” I forced myself to quit babbling.

  Aunt Glinda brushed a hand back through her thinning chin-length hair that still glimmered like the bright copper of shiny new pennies. I had the sneaking suspicion it was maintained in a salon, but I’d never ask. “What do you mean?” she asked. I could tell she was suspicious, after all I’d practically disappeared after Uncle Henry’s death, but she had raised me. Aunt Emma and my mother, Willa, hadn’t spoken to me since I left and I’d long since stopped considering Willa my mother.

  “I’m not sure, to be honest.”

  “I don’t know that he left anything to anyone, sweetheart, but you’re welcome to look through his things. What wasn’t sold after he was laid to rest is stored in the guest room upstairs.” She knotted her hands in her lap and studied them. “I’ve been working through the boxes one at a time, but I haven’t quite finished them all.”

  Guilt swarmed over me. “I’m sorry I haven’t been able to help you. I should have been here.” Brandon’s hand squeezed on my leg. I put mine over his.

  Aunt Glinda waved a hand and smiled. “Not your fault. You’ve been through enough. I understand why you had to leave. Sometimes after something tragic happens, you have to go somewhere new. I don’t blame you.”

  “You should haven’t left to do this all on your own. You two weren’t even related anymore.”

  “Someone had to, and Uncle Henry was family. He was a good man,” Aunt Glinda said.

  “The best.” After a moment where we both lapsed into silence remembering the man whose memory still haunted us both, I added, “We won’t stay in your hair too long.”

  “Well, you may have to and you are more than welcome to. Haven’t you been watching the weather? A tornado will hit soon.”

  What kind of Kansas girl was I? I definitely knew about tornados. I’d been so preoccupied I had ignored the signs. “Gosh, no. I’ve been so distracted. Thank you for letting us stay.” Suddenly remembering my manners, I said, “Aunt Glinda, this is my...friend, Brandon.” Friend was the most innocuous way I could characterize our relationship. “Brandon, this is my Aunt Glinda.”

  Aunt Glinda smiled as Brandon moved toward her and offered his hand respectfully. “Ma’am,” he said.

  Was I seeing things or was Aunt Glinda blushing?

  “We won’t take too long.”

  Aunt Glinda stood and pulled me into a hug. I had forgotten how good her hugs were. They were soft and warm and reminded me of hot chocolate and rainy days reading in the big stuffed chair still situated under the bay windows in the office. When she eased back, she said, “Take all the time you want. As far as I’m concerned, this house is yours anytime you need it.”

  “Thank you,” I told her and motioned for Brandon to follow me up the stairs to the second level where the bedrooms were located.

  “What do you think we’re looking for?” he asked. “Are you looking for the shoes Tin and Lev keep talking about?”

  I exhaled. “No. They aren’t here.”

  “Where are they?”

  I eyed him hard. Who was Crow? He has just been the simple farmer growing food on the compound. But now, I didn’t trust anyone. What hidden in the shoes, maybe in the sole or the heel? Why would Tin and Lev and the Wizard go to such extreme measures to get them?

  I made a decision. Then and there. At the moment, I didn’t know enough about Crow to trust him. Maybe his good guy image was just an act.

  “I don’t know.”

  He didn’t react to my words which made me secretly happy. Maybe he really was a good guy. All I knew was that I was completely paranoid.

  I groaned as I pushed through the door to the guest room. Uncle Henry’s scent permeated the very air, even though it had been long enough for me to forget it. How could something so innocuous cling to everything? Like leather and the tobacco he liked. It was amazing considering his things were packed away in boxes. There were roughly twenty or so stacked under the windows, on top of the dressers and even in the closets and bathrooms.

  Tears sprung to my eyes, but I cleared my throat and said, “I guess we’d better get started,” instead of succumbing to them.

  I picked a spot at random and decided to sequester myself in the closet until I got my emotions under control. Bad idea because the closet was where his scent was the strongest. These past few horror-filled days had shifted the focus of my grief and rage, but the smell of the man I’d lost so suddenly and so violently brought it all back to the forefront.

  Oh, Uncle Henry, what did you get yourself into?

  The clothes whispered against each other as I searched through each and every one of his sweaters, slacks, and button-up shirts. I picked up every pair of his loafers and sneakers and pawed through them. The closet featured two sides, each with a stack of boxes piled to the top and more on the shelves above. I sifted through the papers stored on the top shelves and found only ancient farm records. The boxes of mementos on the bottom shelf gave me no clues either. It only made me miss him all the more.

  I moved from the closet to his attached bathroom. The likelihood I would find something of worth amongst his shaving cream and toothpaste was slim
to none, but it had become a ritual of sorts. I didn’t really get to say goodbye once the investigation had tapered off with no results. By then I was wholly focused on finding his killer. Vengeance didn’t allow room for grief.

  When the door slammed below us, I came out of the bathroom, my panicked eyes going to Brandon, who was searching through the boxes on the dresser. He came to stand in front of me, his strong arms pushing me behind him as though to protect me.

  “What was that?” I asked, thinking of Lev’s watchful eyes and Tin’s menacing grin. Had they found us? I trembled, thinking of the cabin, of their relentless torture. I couldn’t go back there. I wouldn’t.

  Without answering, Brandon inched forward and eased open the door to eavesdrop. My ears strained to collect sound, but all I could decipher were the soft undertones of muted murmurs. He tilted his head towards the stairs and listened.

  After a moment, he said, “I don’t think it’s them. The two voices are from women.”

  The tension in my chest eased. “It’s probably my other aunt,” I said, secretly hoping my mother hadn’t decided to drop by unannounced. Now that would have been my luck.

  “Your uncle’s widow?”

  I nodded grimly, though I didn’t know what she would be doing at his house. She didn’t even go to the funeral.

  “Find anything?” I asked while he listened.

  “No, nothing that looks like it could be important. The boxes on the dresser only had clothes in them. Nothing unusual. You?” Brandon asked gently. I guess the hot, achy feeling in my face wasn’t so easily washed away in the cool stream from the bathroom sink.

  “Nothing,” I answered. “Let’s go downstairs. I don’t want to leave Aunt Glinda alone with her. Auntie Em can be a viper.”

  We arrived downstairs just in time to hear Aunt Emma spat, “You shouldn’t have let her come back here. If it weren’t for her, Henry would be alive.”

  Hearing her vicious words was like walking smack dab into a concrete wall. I entered the kitchen and a gasping sound escaped my chest, causing Aunt Glinda and Aunt Emma to turn to me. They looked nothing alike. Where Aunt Glinda was light and trim, Aunt Emma was dark and wide. One exuded happiness and warmth and the other contempt and spite.

  “Well, well, well, the princess returns. Did you have a nice trip?” Aunt Emma asked, venom dripping from her every word.

  “Thank you for letting us visit, Aunt Glinda, but we should probably get going,” I said without answering Aunt Emma. I could hardly look at her, not with the memory of Uncle Henry so fresh on my mind.

  “Don’t you ignore me,” Aunt Emma said, her cheeks flushed with outrage. “I knew you come sniffing around.”

  “You don’t have to run off,” Aunt Glinda said, also ignoring her sister, which made me want to smile. “I told you you’re welcome to stay as long as you like.”

  “No, she is not,” Aunt Emma interjected. “Henry was my husband. Mine. And she acts like no one cared more about him. It’s sick, I tell you. He killed himself. That’s it. It’s not right of her to keep dragging it back up over and over again. Let the man rest in peace.”

  “You hush now, or I’ll kick you out on your ass,” Aunt Glinda told her.

  “I’m out of here.” She grabbed her Gucci purse and spun on her heels. They weren’t as nice as the ones Uncle Henry gave me and it gave me a sick sense of satisfaction to imagine her rage the day I would wear them in front of her…if I ever wore them again. “Don’t come running to me when that girl drags you down with her.” The screen door slammed behind her after she stomped out.

  Aunt Glinda merely turned to me and smiled. “Now that the witch is gone, we can talk.” As she herded us into the living room she said, “I wanted to tell you before, but I knew Emma was due any minute. She’s been coming around almost every day, which isn’t like her. I think she believes I’ll give her the house even though Uncle Henry left it to me in his will.”

  “You can’t!” I blurted.

  “Of course not, dear, but that doesn’t stop her from trying. She’ll take it over my dead body. But that’s not what I want to talk to you about.”

  “What is it?”

  “Your uncle did leave you something. I wanted to make sure Emma was gone for good before I gave it to you.”

  My heart began to pound in my chest. Brandon and I shared a tension-filled glance as Aunt Glinda retrieve something from another room. When she returned, she held an envelope out to me and said, “Henry made me promise to give this to you if anything happened to him. He’d gotten a bee in his bonnet and went and redid his will and everything. After he was done, he stopped by my house and gave this to me. I’ve been saving it until I saw you again.”

  “What is it?” I could only repeat.

  “It’s yours, sweetheart. I wouldn’t look at it.”

  Of course, she wouldn’t.

  I slipped my finger under the flap, heart thundering like I was running a marathon. I pulled out a letter and read:

  Dearest Dorothy,

  If you’re reading this, they have found you. I’m sorry, my girl, I never meant for it to come to this. Please forgive me. I’m not who you think I am, but you have to know I always loved you like you were my own. You will find what you are searching for in Emerald City.

  Love always,

  Uncle Henry

  15

  Crow

  Dorothy’s face went pale when she read the letter.

  “What? What is it?”

  She didn’t answer and stood there with a sad stare on her heart-shaped face.

  “I, I need to be alone.”

  She took off, darted through the door, and ran out into the backyard.

  I chased after, refusing to allow her to be alone when she clearly had just been shocked to her core.

  She was running faster, past the backyard into the nearby expansive plains. For a second, I thought I heard a rustling in the distance but ignored it. It had to be some farm animals or the rumble from the upcoming storm. Even though I had only been in Kansas for a few days, I appreciated the peacefulness of the landscape and the warmth of the climate. The eerie calm before the storm. Well, warm compared to the Arctic.

  “Dorothy,” I screamed, but she kept running. Running away from something, or toward something, or just simply running.

  I accelerated until I reached her and pulled her into me. Once she was safely in my arms, I cradled her face.

  “Dorothy. What is it? Tell me!”

  She shook her head, her beautiful brown eyes blinking back tears.

  “Uncle Henry. . . he . . . I ruined my life for nothing.”

  A pressure built in my chest. “What? What did the letter say?”

  “Everything. Nothing. Basically, I’ve wasted the last year of my life for nothing. A lie. He pretty much told me he was involved in something. What, I don’t know. And Tin and Lev could be right? Maybe he put something expensive in the shoes. A computer chip or drugs. I don’t know. I was so stupid to think that he really wanted me to have something nice like those shoes. All I know is he’s a liar.”

  She burst into sobs. I held her tightly, never wanting to let go.

  I took the letter, now crumpled and tear-stained, from her hand.

  The words shocked me.

  Dearest Dorothy,

  If you’re reading this, they have found you. I’m sorry, my girl, I never meant for it to come to this. Please forgive me. I’m not who you think I am, but you have to know I always loved you like you were my own. You will find what you are searching for in Emerald City.

  Love always,

  Uncle Henry

  I took a deep breath and cupped her face. “Then we must go to Seattle.”

  Dorothy’s eyes flew open. “Seattle?”

  “Yes, the Emerald City. You will find what you are looking for there.”

  She rolled her eyes at me, and I immediately cringed. My father used to do the same thing before he would berate me. Dumbass, dolt, stupid. His words rang in my
head.

  I took a step back from her. “Nevermind. Forget I said anything.”

  This time, she pulled me to her. “No. It’s not that. That is a good idea. Forgive me, Brandon. I know you are trying to help. But I ruined my life because I believed so hard in my uncle’s innocence. I dropped out of school, gave up my dream job, took that horrid job in the Arctic, and worst of all, Toto is missing. I spent a year stalking Tin, convinced he was a cold-blooded killer. I mean, he still could’ve killed Uncle Henry who I don’t believe is still on this earth, but now I realize it’s not black and white. What if my uncle was a bad man? My mom’s a psycho; you saw my Aunt Emma. Aunt Glinda is the only one who is normal. These people are my family. Maybe I’m evil like they are.”

  I shook my head. “No, you’re not. I’ve seen you. The real you. You cared more about me than your own safety.”

  She shook her head. “That’s not true. I was determined to do whatever it took to avenge Uncle Henry’s kidnapping. And he knew something was up. He had to have known he was in danger. He had to know people would come find him for the shoes. And he put my own life in danger by giving me these shoes everyone wants. He begged me to come over that weekend. And I did. And he betrayed me. I ruined my life for nothing.”

  “No, Dorothy. It wasn’t nothing. It was all worth it. I met you.”

  Her face registered my words. She placed her hand on my chest and that was all the confirmation I needed. I grabbed her wrists and pulled her to the ground, flipping her on top of me, my mouth taking hers.

  She didn’t resist, no. She attacked me back. Hungry. Ravenous. She bit my bottom lip as I ran my hand through her mop of wild hair. My heart beamed—she did want me. This time it was just me and her. No psycho Lev telling us what to do. Forcing us. I pushed him out of my head. There was no need for him here in the field. He had taken enough from us.

  I flipped her over on her back and undid her blouse. It was blue and white checkered and was tied in a knot over her breasts. The gingham fabric fell beside her and revealed her black bra. Last time, with eyes on us, I had been so rushed. I had just wanted to get it over with, so I didn’t have to humiliate her any more than I had been forced to.