The Artist And His Alpha

by Lisa Oliver

  “Oh.” Well, that was telling him. Sean wanted to claim him as a mate, even though he was only an Omega. Caden wasn’t sure if he wanted to dance for joy, or throw himself off of the fire escape. Gods this relationship stuff was confusing the crap out of him.

  “I’m assuming that’s okay. I promise I won’t make much noise or disturb your work, but I kinda need to be around you, if you understand what I mean.”

  Now the man blew him away with his honesty, and although Caden didn’t have a clue what to say, he managed to place his hand on top of Sean’s big fist. He was still staring at the rooftops, but felt Sean twist his hand, so their fingers were entwined. Caden leaned slightly so that his head rested on Sean’s solid biceps, and filled with pancakes, Caden watched the sun slowly climb the sky, happy to be sitting with his mate. Something he never dreamed he would ever do.

  Chapter Six

  Bastard Alpha must think I am completely stupid, Caden thought as he watched Sean leave the apartment. The big man said he needed to pop home, grab more clothes, and that Liam wanted him at the club for something. After scenting Sean’s arousal for more than a week, Caden had a pretty good idea why Sean was going to the club and it had nothing to do with Liam. He simply wasn’t sure what he was meant to do about it. The thought of Sean intimate with someone made his skin itch and his wolf howl in his head. But apart from that first day, when Sean cooked for him and stayed with him, holding his hand, the Alpha said nothing more about claiming him at all. Sean certainly never made a move on him and Caden was starting to think he had imagined the whole conversation.

  The two men slept in the same bed at night. Both wearing boxers, staying rigidly apart while awake, but gravitating towards each other while they slept. Sean worked on his computer during the day, doing goodness knows what, while Caden painted. Sean cooked, cleaned, did Caden’s washing, and gave him space to paint. In the evenings they sat on the fire escape, shared a few drinks and talked. At least Sean talked. He would talk about his family, the closeness he had with Liam and how things were done in his home pack. Caden would listen, thinking that it all sounded like an amazing fairytale, given how different Sean’s reality had been from his. But he never offered anything about his own life. Who would want to listen to such negativity after hearing about the life Sean enjoyed?

  Caden knew it would happen. He knew Sean would tire of him. Caden was sensible enough to understand he didn’t have a life, or anything to offer an Alpha who had everything he could possibly want at his fingertips. Sean grew up in a close-knit pack, with status, money, and a loving family. He had a business, friends, lovers (probably, although Sean never mentioned anyone specific) and a busy life. Caden had none of those things, except money of his own. In comparison, Caden’s whole life had been about survival. His only friends were Marla and Felix and now Felix was mated he didn’t come around anymore. Marla only got in touch when she wanted more paintings. Caden learned not to expect anything else, so while he could appreciate how Sean had a mating imperative to be with him, it clearly wasn’t strong enough to act on. Caden wasn’t sure whether to be angry or hurt by the whole deal.

  Glaring at the blank canvas facing him, Caden shut everything out of his mind and let his muse take over. He rarely planned his paintings, he would simply start applying color to canvas, and sooner or later an image emerged. This time would be no different. But even as he grimaced when he saw the picture stemming from his mind and flowing through his fingers and the brushes they held, he couldn’t stop – as much as he kept telling himself he should.

  Time had no meaning as Caden worked. He added light, color, facial details, backgrounds that conveyed emotions he couldn’t even articulate. Caden knew his verbal skills were often hampered by his natural anxiety, but on a canvas he had no restraint. By the time he stood back to view the finished work, tears were rolling unchecked down his cheeks. His latest picture punched him in the face with his own reality.

  Over two thirds of the canvas, Caden painted a club scene. There were beautiful men, fancy drinks, and bright lights. In the center was Sean, holding court, looking as sexy as ever in a sharp suit. The Alpha held a drink in one hand, a young man on his lap, a second man leaned over his shoulder as though whispering in his ear, while yet another was looking at him coyly. The easy smile on Sean’s face, the excitement and the buzz he clearly got from the attention – anyone viewing the picture would know that Sean was the star, the center of the universe, and everyone around him naturally fell under his spell.

  In the bottom left third of the picture, the viewer could see the outside of the club. The darkness of the night sky providing a clear division between the light and laughter going on inside and the loneliness that stemmed from being an outsider. Standing on a wooden crate, looking in the window was a solitary slender white wolf. Tail down, head hunched between his shoulders, ears back, there was no denying the despondency of the animal, or the reason for it.

  Caden forced himself to face what he was seeing, what his picture told him in graphic detail. The fact Sean would never want to be with him when he was a natural people magnet. Life, laughter, fun, they were concepts for other people to enjoy – they weren’t part of Caden’s world and were never likely to be. In the week they had been together, Sean never once offered to take him out or suggested they go on a date, or simply go for a walk. The only time Sean mentioned going out was earlier that evening; he never even asked if Caden wanted to accompany him. He had just said he was going and left. Left to have fun with other people, fuck other men and be the life and soul of the club scene – all without Caden.

  Suddenly a lifetime of holding himself together, of never being good enough, rose inside of him and he was powerless to control his despair. He felt his heart pound, and he gasped as his body went into overdrive. Without warning Caden lost it. He roared, he screamed, he cursed the heavens. How could the Fates be so cruel?

  In a fit of strength he didn’t know he had, Caden grabbed the canvas and tossed it on the floor. When it didn’t break, he deliberately took one corner and tore it apart with his bare hands, the tears streaming down his face as he desecrated his work for the first time since he learned what a canvas was. He hated that painting – he hated what it meant, and worst of all, he hated the stark reality it represented because it was all so true.

  When the walls of his precious sanctuary became too confining for his emotional turmoil, Caden threw the tattered bits of his painting on the floor, and raced out of the apartment. He didn’t bother to lock up; he didn’t even turn off the lights. Caden was running from the truth – a truth that hurt more than any beating he’d ever had, any torture he’d ever endured in the past.

  In that moment he hated who he was, hated what he’d been through, and hated that in the shifter world, he was clearly the only one in existence not worthy of his fated mate. Everything Sean had told him, about how Omegas were cherished and special became a mockery. Why had the man taunted him with such cruel lies? Especially when the one man who had the power to make Caden feel he might be worth something, the one man who could bring some light into his otherwise dark existence, would rather go out and fuck someone else.

  /~/~/~/~/

  Sean breathed a sigh of relief when Liam slipped into the booth beside him. He’d been waiting two hours for his brother to show up, his chest aching every second he was away from his mate. Men had been hitting on him left, right and center, and rather than lap up the attention, it was setting Sean’s anger to a slow boil. One more wink in his direction he was sure he was going to do something nasty and not in the way his fans were hoping.

  “Took you long enough. What did you want to see me about that was so important?” He snapped.

  “Why, hello to you brother. Nice to see you and all that. What jumped up your ass and bit you?” Liam said, his tone snarky and his eyebrow raised.

  “You said you wanted to see me, so I’m here. I didn’t feel right about leaving Caden alone and I’ve been sitting here for two fucking
hours. Now what did you want?” Sean wasn’t in the mood to be polite.

  “Er, Sean, bro. This is a social call. I thought we could all have a drink together, so I could get to know your new mate. I sorta figured that you two would have done the deed by now, and I wanted to officially congratulate my new brother-in-law. Felix was keen to catch up too.”

  “Your text said you wanted to see me. You didn’t say anything about Caden.”

  “Well, duh! You’re a couple. It’s automatic for guys like us to always go as a pair. I shouldn’t have had to actually mention your new mate; I merely assumed he’d be glued to your side. It’s not as though your wolf would be happy leaving him behind.”

  “He’s not, and I’m not,” Sean said, rubbing his chest again. Fuck it hurt. Did it mean something was wrong with Caden? “Mated I mean. I haven’t claimed him yet.”

  “Are you mucking my friend around? Only if you are, so help me, I’ll fucking deck you so hard. Where is he?” Felix slipped into the booth beside Liam, and handed his mate a drink.

  “At home, where he always is,” Sean snarled, annoyed that both Felix and Liam had such a rosy glow already. He wanted that with Caden and it was no closer to happening than it was the week before. “He paints, he eats, he sleeps. He doesn’t do anything else. When we talk it’s always me doing the sharing, he just listens to me, he never tells me anything about himself. In an entire week he hasn’t made one move on me, hasn’t flirted with me once. He hasn’t done anything to let me know he even wants me. I don’t even know if there is any point in going back. He’s not been making any effort towards us being a couple.”

  “You sanctimonious bastard!” Felix was glaring now and Liam didn’t look happy either. “You’re talking about Caden here; Caden who’s had a lifetime of abuse – a virginal Caden who wouldn’t know the first thing about flirting with a man or a woman because he’s never done it. Caden, who only stays at home because he doesn’t feel safe when he goes out alone. Have you ever offered to take him out for a meal or something?”

  “No.” Sean was shocked at how angry Felix was being, not to mention what the man had said, and figured he’d keep his answers short and honest.

  “Do you talk to him about his dreams of the future, or where he might like to go for a vacation?”

  “No.”

  “Do you have a clue what his favorite foods are, have you taken him to the movies, offered to buy him a television…I don’t know, have you done anything to suggest you might be interested in him?”

  “Not exactly. I was waiting for him to make a move on me.” He was a freaking Alpha; he didn’t go running after anyone. But Sean was starting to think maybe he had been making a few mistakes with his mate.

  “Sean,” Liam broke in quietly. “He’s an Omega, man. An abused Omega. He could be with you for the next hundred years and he’d still never make a move on you unless he was one thousand percent sure that you would welcome his advances.”

  “I was trying to give him space to make a move on me willingly.” Sean kept his voice low, but inside he was itching to get back home – Caden’s place. It was home he realized and all because of the man who was in it. Fuck, he should never have left Caden on his own. Sean felt his gut clench and he didn’t like it one bit.

  “Your restraint is admirable, but there’s a freaking good chance that you’ve been sending Caden mixed messages,” Liam said. “I know you told him you wanted to claim him on day one, but then what? Face it, if he didn’t want you around, he would’ve kicked you out, because I have never known anyone so territorial about his space. The fact that he lets you stay is telling you heaps, man, can’t you see that? And you’ve got the cheek to say you’re not sure if you should go back now you’re here? You’ll be fucking lucky if he lets you in the door, let alone his bed, you’ve been such a moron. How could you leave him alone, unclaimed, and head out on the town without a second thought?”

  “He’s never said anything about wanting to go out. He’s a loner and just keeps to himself. I don’t know how to deal with that.”

  “He’s scared of his own shadow. If you claimed him and showed him you would protect him when you went out, things would be a lot different,” Liam persisted. Sean didn’t think he could feel any worse but he did. Liam had never taken anyone else’s side over his before. And the worst part was, Liam had good reason.

  “I care about him, I do, but I’ve never come across anyone who acted like a hermit. Do you honestly think claiming him would help? Lord knows I want to, I just don’t want to make things worse,” Sean said. If Liam was taking Caden’s side, then Sean was in deeper shit than he thought. Liam was making perfect sense, and Sean mentally kicked himself for not realizing what was going on with his little mate before.

  “I need to show you something, in the office,” Felix said suddenly, standing up. Seeing as Liam stood too, Sean followed, although he couldn’t think of anything in his office that might hold his attention for longer than five minutes. He did all of the book work for the club on his computer.

  As they walked through the club that he and Liam were so proud of, Sean wondered why he hadn’t thought to share his second home with Caden. It was clean, smart, the DJ played a good mix of music, and the place had a decent crowd every night of the week. If Caden had anxiety issues with going out alone, it was unlikely he’d ever visited the place before. Felix’s first time in the bar was after meeting Liam.

  The three men filed into the large office that Sean and Liam shared. But instead of two large desks and a pile of papers, stacked against the walls were ten to fifteen paintings. Sean had seen enough of Caden’s work to recognize his style. He just didn’t understand why Felix would want him to look at more of his mate’s work – he’d seen it every day for the past week. It was good, he liked it, but didn’t he have more important things to do, like get home?

  Felix wandered over to the paintings and started flicking through them, pausing every now and then. “When Caden first started sharing his art, I realized he had a unique style. He could paint the things he couldn’t say. Over the past few years I’ve clued in, if you like, into his mood shifts, because of the different things he’d painted, and when Liam explained more about Omega wolves, I got Marla to let me have Caden’s wolf pictures back. I think you should see them.”

  “I know he can paint wolves,” Sean said, coming forward. “He painted my wolf before he’d even seen it.”

  “We think he had seen it bro,” Liam said, perching on the edge of his desk. “When I saw the wolves in the paintings he’d done before he even met you, I rang Dad and talked to him. It seems sometimes, when they are in the general physical vicinity of their mates, an Omega can dream about him or her, and can do for years before they meet.”

  “From the dates on these pictures, Caden’s been dreaming of you, in your wolf form at least, for the best part of two years, maybe more. It’s hard to know because he didn’t paint until after he met me, but it would be safe to assume that you’ve been in his dreams since he arrived in Los Angeles.”

  “I didn’t think that was possible,” Sean said, taking the first painting Felix handed him. He gasped and almost dropped the canvas. His wolf was in the painting, there was no doubt about that, right down to the intelligence in his eyes and the slightly bent whisker he had on the left side of his mouth. But the wolf wasn’t the central figure in the painting, he was off the side, totally disinterested in the action going on – a small white puppy being snarled at and threatened by a pack of angry wolves.

  “Then there’s this one.” Felix handed him another. This time the black wolf was running with others of his kind, while a young white wolf hid in the bushes, cowering in the hopes of not being seen. The pup was dirty, skinny and clearly scared, such a contrast to the large black Alpha with this thick healthy coat, muscled body and strong teeth. The image broke Sean’s heart. If he had any doubts about what Caden dealt with growing up, they were completely gone. If the paintings were even remotely related to
Caden’s real life, then the boy had been abused from birth.

  “There are more, but I think you get the general idea. All of these paintings were done in the last two years, and Caden only paints the white wolf if he’s been having nightmares, or dealing with his memories,” Felix explained. “Liam and I think, that when Caden has these bad dreams, you are in them. Not as an abuser, but simply as someone who doesn’t do anything to stop what is going on.”

  “That’s unfair. I didn’t know what was going on, I hadn’t met him. But I’m here for him now, can’t he see that?”

  “He thinks you’re too good for him. You can tell from the pictures he’s done of you since you’ve met,” Felix said. “Caden has enormous self-worth issues. I felt sure that spending time with you would help him, especially when Liam explained the whole ‘fated mates’ concept and how you guys felt about wolves like Caden. But from the sounds of it you can’t be bothered to take him out, talk to him about how he sees the future, or anything I was told mates would do. He doesn’t need anyone making him feel worse, and he doesn’t need to relive his past to make you feel good because he was sharing something. Did it ever cross your mind that he didn’t share any of his past, because he had nothing positive to say?”

  “It can’t be that bad, surely. These are paintings, figments of Caden’s imagination,” Sean protested, his heart thumping fast as he realized he might have done more harm than good to his little mate. “They aren’t real.”

  “Every one of Caden’s paintings reflect how he sees his reality. In his latest paintings of you, in your human form with the wolf beside you, he painted you as an unreachable God – someone to be idolized, but too perfect to touch.”