Harlem’s hand went to her stomach. “That can’t be right. It can’t be.”
Damian was in agony. It was as if his heart was being held in a steel vice. “My baby is finally having a baby.”
Carter was caught between disbelief, sadness, and anger. A baby?! Harlem was pregnant. He attempted to keep his temper in check. “The treatments took?”
“Yeah. We found out a few days ago.” Damian responded.
“Why would you work to have a baby using my sperm, knowing all of this?!”
Damian’s guilt wouldn’t even allow him to look at Harlem. “You have a right to be pissed—both of you. Initially, I pushed ahead out of denial, but I had another idea when the truth finally started to settle. I figured a baby would heal all of us.”
“Heal us? How in God’s name?” Carter was utterly dumbfounded.
Harlem still couldn’t speak.
“I thought wrongly that it would give me the family I’ve always wanted. A child would help Harlem to realize that she doesn’t always have to be perfect. And, finally, a baby would show you that it was possible to love someone more than yourself.” Damian extended his hands. “Look, I should have put trying to have a baby on pause until I beat cancer. I never thought in a million years that I wouldn’t win this battle. When I realized this was a fight I wasn’t going to win, I was fully prepared to come clean. I was dead wrong to not have fully disclosed my diagnosis the second I found out.”
The magnitude of Damian’s words hit Harlem like a ton of bricks. Damian was dying, and she was pregnant. “I-I need a minute.” Harlem shot out of her chair and left the room.
Carter was in total and complete shock. Damian was standing there telling him that he was dying and confirming that Harlem was pregnant.
He was going to be sick.
Damian glanced heavenward. “I have no right to ask this of you.”
“No. You don’t.” Carter agreed. He was seething and devastated. “So, don’t do it. You can beat this thing, and you are going to be a great father.”
“I’m fighting as hard as I can, but if something were to happen to me, I need you to take care of Harlem and the baby.”
“What the fuck, Damian? Harlem doesn’t need me to take care of her.” He ran a hand down the back of his head. “This is some bullshit. I want to punch you in the face and hug you at the same time!” Carter’s voice was strangled. “How could you plan my life and Harlem’s without letting us in on it?!”
“At the time, it sounded like the perfect plan. You and Harlem can raise this baby. Hell, you might even fall in love.”
“That’s sick. How can I love your woman?”
“The more I thought about it, the more I realized you’re actually perfect for each other. Harlem is softer than you think, and you’re not as tough as you believe. You’re going to need someone after I’m gone.”
“That’s the meds from your treatments talking.”
“I always thought of myself as Superman. Even after the diagnosis, it still didn’t seem real. It’s only been the past couple of weeks that I’ve been staring mortality in the face. I know it’s a lot to ask, but I need you to make sure she’s okay. If the day ever comes, I don’t know how she’ll cope, and I’ll need you to be there for her . . . and the baby.”
“I don’t know if I can make that promise. As a matter of fact, I won’t. You’re going to be here to marry that woman and raise your own damn child.”
Damian knew he was fighting a losing battle and couldn’t expect Harlem and Carter to accept this overnight. It would take time. So, instead of pushing the issue, he spoke softly. “I hope so. I hope so.”
*****
Three weeks later, sandwiched between her parents, Harlem stood over Damian’s casket. Just like that, he was gone. She felt so many emotions. It was a tie between devastation and guilt.
Carter was just numb. Everything happened so fast. It was all a blur. None of it seemed real. He glanced up at Harlem. She would never forgive him for making the decision to take Damian off of life support. He wasn’t sure he could forgive himself. He walked over toward her. “Harlem . . .”
“Don’t.” She slowly raised her head. Her eyes were shooting daggers. “Don’t you ever speak to me.” She stormed off.
Her parents looked at him with sympathy. Her mom touched his arm. “She’s hurt and angry. With time, Harlem will realize that you did the right thing. Damian was suffering at the end. He’s now at peace.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Thomas.” Carter needed to hear those words.
Harlem’s mom and dad offered their condolences before walking away. “We are deeply sorry for your loss.”
Carter went back and stood over Damian’s casket long after everyone had left. His head was bowed, his hands were stuffed in his pockets, and he felt utterly alone. The woman he’d been dating the past couple of weeks came to stand by his side. “I know you may not know it now, but you’re going to be just fine. I’ll make sure of it.”
Chapter 23
Present Day
Carter took Route 137, Buckley Road off-ramp. They were now only about ten to fifteen minutes away from Harlem’s childhood home. She had fallen asleep, and Carter needed to wake her up. He said her name gently. “Harlem.”
At the sound of his voice, she roused from sleep.
Carter squeezed her hand just a little since he hadn’t let it go from earlier. “We’re getting close.”
Harlem began to fully wake. She blinked a few times. “I can’t believe I fell asleep.”
“I can.” Carter laughed. “You were snoring the entire way here.”
Harlem was a little embarrassed because she wasn’t sure if he was kidding or not. “I don’t snore. Do I?”
He glanced over and gave her a little shrug and a half-smile. Harlem hadn’t made a sound, but Carter decided to let her think she had.
She almost smiled too. “Whatever. I should text my parents since we are so close.”
Harlem removed her hand from underneath his, and Carter immediately missed the warmth. He tried to shake off the feeling by ignoring it. He used the same hand to turn the steering wheel to make a left turn onto a street called Waukegan Road. His GPS noted they were just a few miles away. Until this moment, Carter hadn’t really thought about how seeing Mr. and Mrs. Thomas was going to go down. The first time they’d met was at Damian’s funeral. This time was different. “How tall is your dad again?”
Harlem was focused entirely on her phone and was texting away. “Don’t you remember from the funeral?”
“That day was kind of a blur.”
Harlem could understand that. “My dad is six-feet and around two-hundred pounds of pure muscle.” She smirked.
Carter had about four inches and twenty pounds over him, not that it would matter. He would never disrespect her dad.
Harlem knew what Carter was thinking and thought it was funny. “I don’t think he’ll do anything to you.” She said underneath her breath. “At least I hope not.”
Damian always managed to get Carter into some shit. Apparently, he was still doing it even from the grave.
Finally, they turned down her parent’s street. Harlem pointed. “It’s the brick house at the end of the cul-de-sac.”
Why was he nervous about meeting her mother and father? This entire experience was foreign and pushed him out of his element. He’d met with powerful men, other billionaires like him, and politicians without so much as a second thought. But Harlem’s dad? There was a little bit of anxiety that had built up in his gut. It was ridiculous. It wasn’t like Carter was Harlem’s boyfriend. They hadn’t conceived this baby together–at least not in the traditional way. And they had only recently decided to become friends. Yet, here he was, performing all the duties of someone in a full-blown relationship. How much support was he supposed to give? The lines were clearly blurred, and it was frustrating.
Carter pulled up into the driveway behind a pick-up truck. The second he cut the engine, the screen door
to the modest home opened, and an attractive older woman who looked a lot like Harlem came running out towards them.
“Elijah! They’re here.” Seconds later, Elaine barreled into Harlem, pulling her only daughter into a tight embrace. Then, she stood back to take a good look at her. “My goodness! You’re glowing.”
“Am I?” Harlem asked. “I look the same to me.”
“You’ve definitely got that pregnancy glow.”
Elaine moved away from Harlem and turned to Carter. “Nice to see you again.” Harlem’s dad finally made it out of the house and was now standing next to his wife.
“Nice to see you again, Mrs. Thomas.” Carter nodded. “You too, Mr. Thomas.”
Harlem’s dad didn’t respond to his greeting right away. There was an awkward silence that hung between them. Elijah’s face was hard as stone as he sized Carter up. Elaine knew not to say a word until he was done–Harlem too. Finally, he extended his hand. “I wondered if I was going to see you again.”
Relieved, Carter smiled and gripped his hand firmly.
Elijah still didn’t crack a smile. There wasn’t a hint of warmth, but he was at least cordial. He hadn’t released Carter’s hand when he started asking a series of rapid-fire questions. “I’m not sure how all this in-vitro shit works. What type of relationship are we supposed to have? You’re the baby’s father, but you’re not. What is your relationship with my daughter? I like things uncomplicated and clear-cut. Nothing about this situation is simple.” He said honestly.
Carter nodded. “I think we can both agree that this is a confusing situation. What I can tell you is that I’m here to honor Damian’s wishes and to support Harlem.”
There was another stare-off between the two men. Elijah held his gaze as if searching for the truth in his eyes, and Carter didn’t blink.
The moments ticked by like a melting glacier.
Finally, Harlem couldn’t take it. She leaned over and spoke softly. “Mom.” Her eyes pleaded for help.
“Elijah,” Elaine said in that voice that her husband understood all too well. “We are not going to have this conversation outside, in the cold, in front of all of our neighbors.” She turned away from her husband and back to Harlem and Carter. “Come on inside. I made an early dinner, and for dessert, I have some of that black-walnut ice-cream that you’ve been craving.” She specifically addressed Carter. “I hope you’re hungry.”
Elijah finally released Carter’s hand. He did something that was supposed to resemble a smile, but it looked more like a painful grimace as he spoke to him. “Elaine is a good cook.”
Carter nodded as if the two men had a mutual understanding and Harlem was relieved. That was her dad’s version of a concession. He would hold off on any more questions until later.
Carter smiled warmly at Elaine. “Harlem raves about your cooking all the time. I’m looking forward to dinner.”
Harlem was happy he didn’t wilt under the pressure of her dad. Other men had. Not Damian, though. He hadn’t bowed to the pressure either. Still, Harlem wondered what was going through Carter’s mind. She more than appreciated that Carter didn’t have to meet the parents, but he had anyway. He could be living his best life but felt a sense of duty and responsibility to her and this child. With every passing day, Harlem’s respect for Carter kept climbing.
*****
Carter walked into the Thomas’ home and was immediately struck by how it made him feel. Aside from the fragrant food coming from the kitchen, he was surrounded by a warm and soothing energy.
“Can you bring my bag to my room?” Harlem asked.
Carter nodded and followed her lead. As they made their way to her bedroom, Carter noticed pictures of Harlem were everywhere. It was clear she was the pride and joy of her family. So very different from his own.
“Here.” Harlem stopped in front of a closed door, opened it, and walked inside. “You can just put my bag on the bed.”
“Shit, Harlem,” Carter said as he crossed the threshold and looked around.
“What?” She looked genuinely confused.
“Did the nineties throw up in here?” He laughed and placed her bag where she’d told him. Carter was struck by two things – all of the vision boards on her walls and how orderly everything was. Carter knew that Harlem had a touch of OCD, but this was ridiculous.
Carter took a closer look at her vision boards. “You literally have a board for every damn thing. How old were you when you started making them?”
“Umm . . . I think thirteen. It was easy to visualize my lists, and making the boards lessened my anxiety.”
“That explains it.”
“What?”
“Let’s face it, you can be over the top. This explains it all.” He tilted his head slightly in complete understanding.
Harlem had been told that many times before, and it was a sensitive subject. “There’s nothing weird about it. I just like order.”
Carter lifted a brow. “I didn’t say weird. I said over the top.”
He continued to study her boards. “The perfect man?”
Harlem held her breath as he read the notes underneath the pictures.
“Tall like Will Smith. Dark like Idris Elba. Fine like Idris Elba. Must be well educated. Must be wealthy and like apocalyptic movies. Damian was almost a ten out of ten. I guess the fact that he didn’t really like the end of the world type of movies was not a big deal.”
“That’s not true. Damian loved them.” Harlem argued.
Carter knew damn well Damian didn’t like those kinds of movies. But he figured Dame went along with it because she did. If that’s what Damian wanted Harlem to believe no point in disputing it. Carter continued to look at her board. “Doesn’t need but would be nice to have–dimples, be physically fit, a black Labrador, nice to my mama . . .” Carter laughed.
“What’s so funny?” Harlem fought hard to keep a stern look on her face.
“Nothing.”
“That was serious stuff.”
He moved on to the infamous wedding board. It was no different than the rest of them. It was very detailed, down to a sample of the fabric Harlem wanted her wedding dress to be made from. There was a My Family vision board. On it, Harlem had a picture of Idris Elba, her, and two children. “Good thing Damian met you before you met Idris. He wouldn’t have stood a chance.”
Harlem laughed. “Probably not.”
“I guess I’ve kinda thrown a monkey wrench into your plans, huh?”
“What do you mean?”
“Your parents are brown. You’re a lighter shade of brown. I’m white.” He pointed to her stomach. “My guess is that baby is going to look bi-racial.”
“I-I don’t have a problem with that.”
“Everything on your board screams I want a black family.”
“Well, I’m black. It makes perfect sense. If I went into your childhood home, I doubt I’d see a vision board with black people on it.”
The lightheartedness on his face went away. “You wouldn’t see any pictures let alone a vision board.”
She touched his arm. “There had to be some good memories.”
“Nope. Not a one.”
“What are your mom and dad like?”
“Honestly, I don’t know.”
Harlem sat down on her bed and picked up Snuggles. “C’mon. They’re your parents. You have to know something.”
“Okay. My mom liked to drink wine way too much. She liked shopping which I guess was a way to numb herself because she hated my father, who also drank too much, traveled too much, and had way too many affairs. They were both so busy living their lives to remember they had a son. I was shipped off to boarding school at eight and came home for summers and holidays. Coincidently, that was right around the time they would go on some type of vacation without me. They divorced when I was thirteen. Nothing really changed after the divorce. During breaks, I was just shuffled from one big ass house to another.”
That knowledge gave Harlem a better unde
rstanding of Carter. “I’m sorry that you paid the price for their need to feel whole.”
Carter cleared his throat. “It was a long time ago. I don’t sweat it.”
Harlem didn’t believe him. “I wish you had a Snuggles to comfort you.” Family shaped every aspect of who he was and why he had trouble bonding with people.
Carter turned up his nose. “That thing looks like it’s been through a lot.”
“Snuggles knows all of my secrets. If you’re nice, maybe I’ll let you borrow him. He’ll keep your secrets too.” They had both suffered enough sadness recently. Harlem decided not to keep pushing.
“I should take you up on the offer. It would probably be cheaper than a therapist.”
Elaine interrupted their conversation when she popped her head into the room. “Hey you guys, dinner is ready. We don’t want it to get cold.”
Harlem got up from the bed and held out her hand. “Come on.” She smiled. “My mom is a sweetheart, but she doesn’t mess around when it comes to being on-time for dinner. We do not want to cross that woman.”
*****
Carter and Harlem were seated across the dinner table from her parents. Carter enjoyed watching Harlem interact with her family. He didn’t say much and found it more interesting to be a spectator. They were so animated. It was like watching something from a television sitcom.
Elaine turned to him. “How did you enjoy your dinner?”
Harlem glanced at his empty plate. She answered with an impish grin. “My guess is good. He didn’t leave anything on it.”
Carter wasn’t going to lie. Harlem’s mom made the best macaroni and cheese he’d ever eaten. He was stuffed. “It was one of the finest meals I’ve ever had.”
Elaine’s smile widened. “Good. I’m glad you enjoyed it. But, I hope you saved room for dessert.”
Elijah killed the joyous atmosphere. “What I want to know is why a billionaire would want to be a sperm donor for my daughter?” At his wife’s request, Elijah had waited until after dinner. Now he wanted answers. “You could probably have had a child with damn near anybody.”
Her Baby His Gift (The Slow Burn Duology Book 1) Page 11
