Heart of Mine

by Lindsay Bergman

  When they saw me, Ashton, Ethan and Bennett immediately stopped talking and stared, their eyes widening appreciatively at my appearance. I grinned at their responses, undoubtedly reassured that I had dressed well for the occasion.

  Sitting in one of the high back chairs, Alexander took one look at me and stood up abruptly, dropping his book on the floor. When he scanned me from head to toe, a blush burned my cheeks at the heat in his eyes. Boldly meeting his gaze, I watched him swallow thickly. Oh yes, he definitely still wanted me.

  Rising from the couch Ethan approached reverently, his expression bordering on awestruck. “Maddy, you are gorgeous.” He gently took hold of my hand. “May I have the honor of escorting you into the ballroom?”

  I peeked at Alexander, waiting to see if he would offer to escort me. But his expression merely darkened before he stalked out of the room without a word. I stared at the empty doorway, feeling crushed.

  “Don’t worry about him,” Ethan said, squeezing my hand. His eyes took in my dress again, and he shot me a seductive smile that made me blush in response. “Now there’s more for me.”

  After a moment, the rest of us followed Alexander out of the study. Ethan and I entered the ballroom together and mingled sociably around the room for a little while before he led me out onto the dance floor.

  I felt a flash of panic as Ethan’s arms wrapped around me, holding me too close for comfort. My heart lurched in protest. Thoughts of Alexander—his strong arms wrapped around me and his lips pressed against mine—came unbidden into my head. I was trying to banish Alexander from my thoughts when I suddenly spotted him across the room, watching us as we twirled around the dance floor. I lost sight of him as Ethan spun me in circles, and when the song was over, he had disappeared.

  We searched the ballroom for Bennett and Arianna, and after exchanging greetings and birthday wishes, the princess pulled me aside.

  She was stunning and elegant in a crimson strapless dress with a long flowing skirt and laced-up back. Her thick long hair framed her beautiful face in curling black waves. “Were you having a nice time with Ethan?”

  I sighed. For years Arianna had been encouraging me to explore my feelings for him, especially after Alexander had told me we couldn’t be together.

  “Ethan is a great guy, but I’m not sure if I’m ready for something more than friendship.”

  Arianna gently touched my arm, her smile compassionate. “Then don’t force it. Just give yourself time, and I know that one day you’ll find the happiness you deserve.”

  While Ethan was sidetracked with Bennett, I ventured out in search of Alexander. It took several minutes before I finally found him outside near the lawn, gazing quietly out at the star-filled night. Beyond the palace walls, the dark sea provided a brilliant backdrop to the tall, handsome prince standing in the center of such a dramatic view. It was like looking at a picture from a storybook, except this prince was more than just words on a page or the title he had been born with.

  Alexander glanced up as I approached and smiled warmly. Holding his gaze, I moved to his side, standing close but not quite touching. I could feel the attraction crackling between us as he once again took in every inch of my evening dress.

  His eyes slowly drifted back up to my burning face. “You are breathtaking, dolcezza.”

  The hot look he sent me was sultry and tangible. The longing to touch him rose fiercely within me as a potent tingling shot all the way down to my toes. The way he was looking at me made it difficult to think straight, let alone keep my distance.

  “Thank you, Alex,” I said breathlessly. Tearing my eyes away from his handsome face, I tried to get my rapid heartbeat back under control.

  Alexander gently cleared his throat and braced his forearms against the half-wall that provided a gorgeous view of the scenery surrounding the palace. We had stood on this spot many times before, but never once had I longed for him as much as I did now.

  I focused my gaze out on the sea, dark and tumultuous in the distance. The multitude of stars reflecting off the glossy, black surface of the water created the illusion that the horizon had disappeared, so that we were staring out at an endless expanse of stars.

  “Can I ask you something?” Alexander asked quietly. I looked at him curiously and nodded. His hands gripped the wall, knuckles white against his tanned skin. “Is there something going on between you and Ethan?” He looked at me, his gaze bold and direct, but with a flicker of vulnerability that I didn’t often see in him.

  I carefully placed a hand over his and answered softly, “No, Alex. There’s nothing going on between us. Ethan and I are just friends.”

  He nodded and continued to study me for a moment. “Is there anyone special waiting for you in Montana?”

  “Why are you asking me this?” I frowned, trying to figure out his angle.

  “Just answer the question, Madison,” Alexander commanded, turning to face me.

  “No, there’s no one waiting for me in Montana.”

  “Good.” The satisfaction that flared in his eyes was the only warning I had before Alexander pulled me into his arms. His gaze locked onto mine, dark and smoldering as he said, “Because I’ve wanted to do this for three very long years.” Then he kissed me and sent my heart somersaulting. His mouth was demanding, his kiss sultry and passionate. His arms tightened like iron bands around my waist, holding me firmly against his chest. It was as if he never wanted to let me go again. More than happy to stay with him forever, I clung to him as my every awareness was filled only with Alexander.

  When he eventually eased back to look down at me, matching smiles lit up our faces. I’d forgotten how good it felt to be held in his arms—and to feel his passionate kiss.

  “I’ve missed you, Alex,” I whispered, feeling love expand within my chest. “More than you’ll ever know. And … I’ve never stopped loving you.”

  He smiled, his expression growing tender, as he drew me closer for a soft and sweetly luxurious kiss. “I think I know what you mean, dolcezza. I’ve thought of you every day since you left, and I’m not going to lose you again.” Alexander shifted back to meet my eyes. “I’m more than ready to be with you, but I should tell you that there’s still a complication.”

  I jerked in his arms. “What do mean? You want me, but we still can’t be together?” My temper flared. I was outraged over the political complication that had kept us apart all these years and was apparently still keeping us apart.

  “No, Maddy,” Alexander argued, his grip tightening when I tried to pull away. “You don’t understand—”

  “I’m sorry to interrupt this sibling rivalry.”

  I stiffened. The voice that spoke from behind us was heartbreakingly familiar. A chagrined Alexander peered over my shoulder, and when his hold loosened I hastily stepped away from him.

  Marie Delacroix sauntered over to the prince and placed a perfectly manicured hand on his arm. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you, mon chéri. King Mathis sent me to find you for a dance.” Marie’s hazel eyes flickered over to me as she explained, “He’s been pushing us together for years.”

  “That’s enough, Marie,” Alexander snapped, prying her hand off his arm.

  But I’d seen enough. I spun away from them without a word, betrayal stabbing through my heart like a knife.

  “Maddy, wait!” Alexander called after me. I ignored him and fled into the garden nearby.

  Over the years, I had often wondered what political complication could possibly be holding him back. My mind always seemed to drift back to the thought that I just wasn’t good enough for a prince, especially not the heir. I was attractive, but not a glamorous beauty like Marie. I wasn’t a socialite, or an aristocrat with a noble pedigree. After centuries of outdated traditions and old-fashioned morals, I suspected that this beautiful, charming country might have difficulty accepting someone like me as a princess.

  Marie, however, would be the perfect princess. Her beauty and grace were flawless, her manners impeccable
. Born into a wealthy and elite family, she had political connections and a long-standing noble bloodline. Not to mention, the blond socialite had a brilliant mind. Arianna had mentioned that she’d recently graduated from Oxford.

  I wandered blindly through the garden until I ran straight into a solid chest. Large hands gripped my arms to steady me, and I looked up into the concerned brown eyes of Ethan.

  “Are you all right, Maddy?”

  “I’m fine,” I mumbled. There was no way that I was telling Ethan about my kiss with Alexander, so I forced a bright smile and asked, “Would you like to dance, Ethan?”

  “Actually, I’d like to talk to you about something.” Ethan ran a hand softly down my arm, his eyes filled with longing.

  My breath caught in my chest, surprised by his sudden intensity.

  “Maddy, we’ve been friends for a long time now. I’ve been waiting for the right moment and I feel like now is my chance.” He reached out to place his hands on my waist and carefully drew me toward him. “I love you, and I want you to choose me.”

  Ethan gathered me into his arms and kissed me, flooding my senses with heat. His lips were firm, yet gentle on mine. Caught off-guard, I gripped his arms, feeling stunned. In the moment of that unexpected kiss, I was surprised to realize that I did feel more for Ethan than just friendship.

  I heard an outraged growl in the doorway behind us. We broke apart abruptly, my face flushing a burning red. I turned to find Alexander glaring at us. As I looked into his jealous blue eyes, my heart squeezed with remorse.

  “Alex,” I called out, taking a step toward him.

  But his open expression suddenly became shuttered and unreadable. His jaw tightened and he looked away, his hands clenched at his sides. He turned and disappeared through the doorway. I stared uncertainly after him for a moment, my heart feeling torn.

  Yes, I had finally realized that I still felt something more than friendship for Ethan, but I wasn’t in love with him. Ethan was compassionate and thoughtful, full of life and easy-going. After years of friendship, I cared deeply for Ethan, but it lacked the passion Alexander and I shared. I wanted to run after Alexander to explain, but didn’t know if I should even bother since the political complication was still keeping us apart.

  “I’m so sorry,” I said to Ethan, struggling to hide my heartache. “My feelings for Alexander are complicated.” I paused, wanting to find the right words but knowing that no matter what I said, it would crush him. “I do love you, Ethan, but ... I’m not in love with you.”

  Ethan was silent for a long moment. I could see the mix of emotions that crossed his face. Unable to completely hide his disappointment, Ethan sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. A thick, awkward tension permeated the air between us.

  “Well …” Ethan began, his voice strained. “I should have known it would always be him.” He attempted a smile before quietly disappearing through a set of French doors.

  Remorse ripped through me as I stared at the empty doorway where both Alexander and Ethan had disappeared. In a span of minutes, I had hurt both of the men I loved the most.

  After finally making my way back inside the ballroom, I stood alone near the dance floor and watched the couples twirling in a perfect waltz. Dancing was my favorite part of a royal event. I was clumsy and uncoordinated, but I always loved watching the graceful dancers moving in perfect unison to the music. As the waltz ended, a new familiar song started to play in a beautiful combination of piano, string and wind instruments. It was our song.

  I tensed and started scanning the room, searching for my prince—even though I doubted he would be anywhere near me after the kiss he’d witnessed outside.

  Miraculously, Alexander was suddenly standing before me. His eyes ensnared mine. Like a doe caught in a trap, I was frozen, unable to move. All I could do was stare into those dark blue eyes, and wish desperately that things could be different between us. Without a word, he took my hand and led me out onto the dance floor.

  Alexander slid his hands slowly over my bare shoulders and down my arms, until they encircled my waist. He held me close, very close. I flicked a glance around the room, wondering if anyone else had noticed the prince’s slip in propriety, but didn’t see any frowns of disapproval in the crowd. For several moments we didn't speak, and simply gazed into each other’s eyes.

  His expression turned exceptionally warm, eyes dark and smoldering. “I meant what I said earlier, dolcezza. I’m not letting you go again, even if I have to fight Ethan for you.” He pulled me closer and his head lowered toward mine. There was no mistaking his intentions.

  “You can’t kiss me in here,” I protested, bracing my hand on his chest. “People are watching.”

  As heir to the throne, Prince Alexander had a reputation to uphold. He’d always been very discreet in public, careful not to draw unwanted attention or gossip. He couldn’t kiss me in the middle of the ballroom without sparking rumors.

  Alexander’s slow smile was undeniably sexy. “Let them. Then they’ll know that you belong to me.” He moved to kiss me again, and I watched his approach as if in a daze.

  I was stunned by his blatant disregard for the guests surrounding us—and that he was willing to risk his reputation for me. A powerful yearning swept through me. Even though I was still upset about the political complication, the temptation to allow myself to be kissed and wrapped in his arms was insistent and powerfully strong. At the last possible second, I turned my head. Alexander’s lips pressed against my cheek instead.

  He sighed, and gently turned my face back to his. “Maddy, there’s a lot that I need to say to you. I know you’re upset with me, but please give me a chance to explain.” He looked into my eyes, his gaze pleading.

  I sighed and nodded, knowing that this was our chance to hash things out once and for all. When our song ended, Alexander instantly led me from the ballroom, unwilling to let me out of his sight again before he could explain.

  We entered an empty parlor and sat on the love seat. It was a beautiful room, with golden vintage floral wallpaper and dark mahogany trim. On one wall, two windows flanked the French Renaissance fireplace that was the focal point of the room. The Louis XVI style wingback chairs and matching love seat were upholstered in a blushing pink velvet and set on an exquisite ornamental rug.

  Sitting on the edge of the couch, I watched as Alexander roughly loosened his tie and collar, remembering all the different times I’d seen him do it before. It was usually out of frustration or nerves, as if the tightness around his neck was strangling him.

  Staring down at the coffee table, Alexander quietly began, “You’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember. But the truth is … you’ve become so much more than that.” He carefully reached for one of my hands and traced the backs of my fingers with his thumb. The eyes that captured mine burned with deep emotion. “You’re the perfect girl for me, Maddy. You are loyal, fearless and affectionate. You make me laugh, and help me remember how to be the man behind the title. You are beautiful and fierce. You are everything I have ever wanted and more.”

  “Oh my,” I murmured, overwhelmed by the depth of his unexpected confession. Did that mean Alexander was in love with me? Abruptly, I remembered the golden haired beauty that had clung to him earlier. “What about Marie?”

  “There’s nothing going on with Marie,” Alexander assured me, his gaze hardening briefly. “My father thought we’d make a good match, but I don’t have feelings for her. The only girl I want to be with is you, dolcezza.”

  “Then what is this complication you’ve been telling me about for years?”

  His expression darkened and the hand holding mine tensed. Alexander stared stonily out the window as he answered, his voice bitter. “The complication is an archaic marriage law that forbids me from marrying any woman without noble blood.” He glanced at me, his expression drawn tightly with indignation. “You are considered a commoner. I can’t marry you if I want to be king.”

  So it was a marriage l
aw that had kept us apart. I was relieved to finally know the truth after all these years, yet the truth still hurt. Even though he wanted to be with me, Alexander couldn’t marry me because I wasn’t a noblewoman. But he could marry someone like Lady Marie Delacroix because she was the daughter of a Duke. It was what I had always feared.

  “I guess I was right all along,” I murmured, removing my hand from his. “I’m not good enough to be with you because you’re a prince.”

  His eyes narrowed. “You need to stop saying that. This law is based on outdated morals that existed over a century ago.” Anger flashed across Alexander’s face and he ran a frustrated hand through his black hair.

  It was clear that this political complication had been bothering him for years. We were merely pawns in a game that was bigger than either of us. Forced to move against our will by the game-makers who determined our fate.

  “What does this mean for us, Alexander?” I looked down at my lap, feeling all of my hope for a future with him slipping away. “I want to get married someday and since you can’t marry me ...” My words trailed off, the implications clear.

  Alexander took my chin in one hand and gently tipped my face up. His intense blue gaze met mine. “Maddy, I want to be with you regardless of this marriage law.”

  “But we can’t just ignore it,” I stammered. I was alarmed by the sudden traitorous hope that gripped my heart. Flustered, I stood abruptly and moved to stand at the window with my back to him, unable to meet his eyes. “You said you can’t marry me if you want to become king. Does that mean what I think it does?”

  I heard Alexander rise and move slowly to stand at my back. Taking hold of my elbow, he carefully turned me around, but I was too nervous to meet his eyes. I stared at the smooth, tanned skin of his exposed throat. Good gracious, even his neck was beautiful! I could see where his throat met the collarbone, his unbuttoned shirt hinting at the wide, muscled expanse of his chest. I swallowed and focused on a button instead.