#CassiNova

by Lori G. Matthews

“She’s coming to the house on Wednesday to look at the yard.”

  Sam’s heart leapt into her throat. “What? Are you kidding me?”

  Jade grinned. “No, I am not kidding. And I have confirmed she is our writer. That was Alexa, aka Alex. Sam, she’s perfect.”

  “Perfect for what?”

  “Your fuck buddy.”

  “Whaaat?”

  “You heard me.”

  “Is that what this is all about? Finding me a fuck buddy? I thought we were just having fun ‘sleuthing’!” She made angry quotes around the word.

  “Sam, she’s fucking hot. I mean, smokin’. Green eyes, your fav-or-ite.” Jade sang the last part.

  “Oh, my fucking God!”

  Dollar bills floated around the car. “Chick oozes sex. I swear it was seeping from her pores. Those lips, oh those lips were begging to be kissed. And I almost did. What else? She flexed, and my undies got wet. Whew.”

  The more Jade talked, the more animated she became. “She has these muscles, actual chest muscles—I couldn’t take my eyes off them.” She took a quick swig of Coke and burped up the carbonation. “You know me. Nobody makes me nervous, but this chick had me squirming. She’s a perfect sexy ten. I am seriously in love already. I was kind of in a daze in her office, and she had to kick me out the door just to get rid of me.” Jade took a deep breath.

  Sam just stared for a few seconds, horrified. “Jesus Christ, she probably thinks we’re nuts. First, we’re hanging in her parking lot for, I don’t know, an hour, like we have some irrational fear of landscaping, then you’re sitting in her office in a catatonic state drooling over her.”

  Jade started the car and cackled. “This is gonna be fun.” She glanced in the rearview mirror. “Where’s the dog?”

  “Yeah, don’t run over her dog. That’ll put a damper on your plans.”

  Chapter Five

  On Wednesday, Alex headed to WeHo. Following the GPS, she turned into the driveway of the address Jade had given. At the security gate, she leaned out the window and pushed the button. The house was much larger than expected. Homes in this area were worth a few million at least, and Alex wondered what jobs the two women had to afford this piece of real estate. Her head was still outside the window when the security camera zoomed in on her face. She slowly backed away as the lens kept coming closer and closer.

  Static crackled, then a faceless voice gurgled, “Hello?”

  Alex shifted closer. “Hello?”

  “Hello?” echoed the disembodied voice.

  Alex paused. “Hello?” Was this a game of hello chicken? Who would be the first to give in?

  “Who dat?”

  “Ah, Alex Novato. I’m here to see Jade and Sarah?”

  The gate slowly swung open.

  Taking a deep breath, she pulled through the entrance and turned a critical eye to the landscaping surrounding the house. A long, terracotta-tiled driveway looped up to the home and back, surrounding a neglected patch of greenery. In the middle of the green patch stood an antiquated fountain with water slowly trickling from the spout. She stopped driving, opened a manila folder, and jotted down a quick note: Replace intake hose on fountain in front yard. Depending on their budget, a whole new fountain was in order. The cherub spitting water out of its mouth felt a little 1940s. But some might consider it retro. She needed to get a feel for their style and taste. The weeds around the fountain grew hip high, and Alex wrote another note: Industrial strength weedwhacker needed, or possibly a small hand grenade.

  After parking her black pickup truck near the front door, she studied the two-story house. The architecture was impressive, with its white stucco and red trim. English ivy surrounded a large picture window in front and snaked its way up to the second story Juliette balcony. Brick-colored clay tiles covered the roof, giving the house Spanish flair. A blue stone patio led to an oversized black front door. Alex scratched down a few more notes, then grabbed her briefcase and rang the bell.

  Jade opened the door immediately, startling her. She had a strong inclination that it had been Jade operating the super zoom.

  “Alex, good to see you. Come in, come in.”

  “Thank you. Wow, the house is beautiful.”

  “Thanks. Sam will be right down.”

  “Who’s Sam?”

  “My, uh, partner.”

  “You mean Sarah?”

  Jade took a quick glance sideways. “Uh, yeah. That’s what I said, Sarah. Follow me.”

  Alex had two thoughts. One, she was disappointed that the blonde was Jade’s partner. And two, Jade was as bizarre as she remembered.

  As they walked through the house, Alex took stock of the interior. The living room gave off a warm cottagey vibe. An overabundance of throw pillows made the space inviting and comfortable. They entered the dining room and Alex caught a view of the backyard through the French doors. “Holy shit.” She held a hand over her mouth. “I’m sorry, excuse me.”

  “Oh, don’t worry about offending me. Fuck is my middle name.” Jade dug into a pocket, pulled out a dollar, and stuffed it in a jar on the dining room table. A jar chock full of bills.

  Alex smiled and Jade blushed. She walked to the French doors. “May I?”

  “Sure, and hopefully Sarah will be down soon.” Jade walked over to the staircase just off the dining room. “Sarah! Alex is here!” She grunted when she received no response and joined Alex, who opened the door and followed her outside.

  They both stopped and stood on the patio, staring at the wasteland that was the backyard.

  “Well?” Jade asked.

  Alex took stock of everything. One word came to mind. Deplorable. The outdoor kitchen appliances were rusted and rickety. Perennials were choked and stunted by the weeds that sprang from every corner of the gardens. The concrete surrounding the pool was cracked and chipped. This poor space had been neglected for years, but she lived for renovating things like this. If they were willing to spend the money, Alex could do wonders with it. A house like this deserved an incredible backyard.

  “Yeah, you were right, it does look like shit. I don’t think I’ve ever seen weeds that tall. You could lose a small child in there.”

  “Funny you should say that. We lost our friend Emma back here for an hour once. But that’s a story for another time. So, it’s fixable, right?”

  “Absolutely, but it depends on how much you want to spend.”

  “Pfft! Money is no object.”

  “Well, let’s crunch some numbers before you make a statement like that. I can fix the landscaping in the front yard too, if you want. Maybe get a new fountain?”

  “Don’t you like our chubby-cheeked 1920s statue?”

  “Oh, well, if you like it, I can certainly work with it.”

  “I’m fucking with you.” Jade reached into a pocket and came up empty. “Don’t tell anybody I said that.”

  Alex nodded, not sure if she meant the fucking with you part, or the liking the statue part. She’d get clarification on it later. “Let’s go inside and browse through some catalogs. Then I’ll take some pictures and measurements.”

  * * *

  Sam checked the living room, but her bestie was nowhere to be found, so she went into the kitchen. Suddenly, the French doors opened, prompting Sam to say, “Hey jackass, why are you yelling Sarah? Do you have some woman tucked away in here I don’t know about?” just as Jade entered the kitchen with Alex.

  They all froze and stared at each other. Well, mostly Alex stared at “Sarah,” who stared back at Alex.

  Sam had lost the ability to speak. She figured her mouth was hanging open. She should probably close it. Or say something. Anything.

  Thank God Jade came to the rescue, making the formal introductions. “Alex, meet Sarah Cass…I mean Sam, Samantha Cassidy. Sam, this is Alex Novato. Alex, sorry for lying to you before. Sam likes to keep things on the down low. She’s an actress.”

  “Yeah, I recognize you, and I totally understand about the down low part.” Alex’s eyes
never left Sam’s face as she walked across the room with an extended hand. “Nice to meet you.”

  Sam stayed frozen in place, not moving until Alex was directly in front of her. Alex had a couple of inches on Sam, so she had to tilt her head back to maintain eye contact. While shaking the offered hand, her gaze wavered. Alex’s stare was intense. Too intense. She felt exposed. Naked. And she still hadn’t spoken, because evidently, being around a hot woman rendered her mute. Her body was reacting much the same way it had in the parking lot. The crazy arrhythmia was back, along with a hot flash that went from toes to cheeks. She prayed nobody noticed the flush in her face.

  “I’m actually her manager,” Jade said. “Not her girlfriend. I have my own girlfriend.”

  Sam finally found her voice. “Yeah, and I have a boyfriend. Brian Davis!” Well, that came out louder than she would have liked. “We’re dating,” she added, just to sound more like a dumbass, because if he was her boyfriend, of course, they would be dating.

  Jade gave Sam the stink eye.

  “Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way.” Alex smiled at both women.

  “Yeah, so, ah, do you have a boyfriend or…a girlfriend?” Jade asked.

  Alex didn’t miss a beat, obviously unfazed by such a personal question. “It would be a girlfriend, but no, nothing serious.”

  “Why?”

  She shrugged and bent down to pick up the briefcase. “Not my style, I guess. I enjoy sex, not relationships.”

  Jade made eye contact with Sam and mouthed, “Perfect.”

  Sam glowered back.

  Alex lifted her head and caught the interaction between the two women. Her brows creased. “Are we still interested in landscaping?”

  Sam was mortified. Alex must think they were idiots with the way they were acting. “We’re definitely interested in landscaping.”

  “All right. I can show you my portfolio. Maybe it’ll give you some ideas. Or if you guys have something in mind?”

  “Sam sketched some stuff,” Jade said. “I’ll get us some water. Let’s sit in the dining room.”

  Sam and Alex headed into the dining room, and Jade soon joined them with three glasses.

  “Alex, you sit here, and we’ll sit on either side, so we can both see.”

  With sketchbook in hand, Sam took a seat next to Alex. She tried to quell her nerves. Jade was right, this woman was sexy as hell, and every time Sam met those green eyes, it felt like Alex removed a piece of her clothing. Hearteyes? More like Sexeyes. With shaky hands and sweaty palms, she opened the book.

  “Let’s see what you have here.” Alex flipped through a few pages. “Wow, these are good.”

  Sam blushed like a schoolgirl. “Thanks.” She wanted to crawl under the table. What the hell was the matter with her? Sam couldn’t recall if she’d put deodorant on, because right now it didn’t feel like it. She felt a trickle of sweat between her breasts. Could this be any more awkward?

  Alex put a binder on the table and flipped through a couple of pages. “Here. I can see this type of retaining wall to replace the one behind the pool.”

  As Sam inspected the pictures, she heard an audible sniff.

  Jade’s nose hovered above Alex’s shoulder.

  The second sniff was snuffed out as both Sam and Alex stared at Jade.

  “Ah,” she stammered, “you smell nice. What is it?”

  “Calvin.”

  “Yeah, well, I like it. Sam, doesn’t she smell nice?” Jade gave Sam the old take-a-whiff-of-this-chick look.

  Sam’s eyes widened. Did she want to engage her sense of smell? It was difficult enough controlling the other senses. Jade’s scowl demanded action, so she leaned in toward Alex’s shoulder and took a whiff, and—oh boy—it went straight to her crotch.

  “Uh, nice, yes. Fits you. It’s, uh, a nice smell.”

  “Thanks.”

  Alex laid a thousand-watt smile on her, making her feel faint and giddy. Sam envisioned herself passing out with a stupid grin on her face. Was it possible? Around this woman, yes. Yes, it was. Her chest heaved with relief when Alex turned her attention back to the binder.

  But the relief was fleeting, because now Jade was making goo-goo eyes at Alex. She winked at Sam and mouthed, “Go for it.”

  “Knock it off,” Sam mouthed back, worried Alex might pick her head up at any moment and catch Jade’s antics.

  But Jade continued, at one point flicking her tongue in a seductive manner. A tiny, embarrassed squeak escaped Sam’s throat.

  Alex finally sat back in the chair. “Are you guys wanting a three-way or something?”

  Sam turned beet red. “Oh my God.”

  Jade blurted out, “No, no. My God no.”

  “Just getting a weird kinda vibe here.” Alex looked back and forth between the two women.

  Jade defused the situation by throwing herself under the bus. “This is totally my fault. I’ll admit, I find you super-hot. And sexy as shit. And believe me, if I didn’t have a girlfriend, I’d do you in heartbeat. You got a body—”

  “Too much,” Sam murmured.

  “What? Oh, all right. Sorry for acting kinda weird. Please don’t freak out.”

  “Okay.” Alex turned to Sam.

  “I have a boyfriend!” Sam blabbered again, louder than the last time.

  “Yeah, you said.”

  With Jade behind Alex’s back mouthing “Stop it,” Sam knew this was one of the most humiliating days of her life.

  “Okay, we good?” Jade asked, glancing between Sam and Alex. “Good. Let’s get it together ladies. Let’s look at some pictures.”

  They were all staring at Alex’s catalog when Jade asked, “So have you ever had a three-way?”

  Sam groaned and reached for the water, wishing it was alcohol.

  “Yes. I have,” Alex said matter-of-factly.

  Sam choked on the water.

  “You okay?” Alex asked.

  “Yeah.” More coughing and sputtering followed, along with a few chest thumps. “Went down the wrong pipe.”

  Jade put an elbow on the table, chin in hand, fascinated. “So what was it like?”

  Alex took a moment before answering. “Distracting in a way. It was hard to concentrate.”

  “Huh. Yeah, I guess so. Was it with two other women?”

  “Yep. Anyway, I can say I had one, but I doubt I would do it again. One on one is much better.” Alex turned to Sam. “Don’t you agree?”

  But Sam was barely listening, wondering if it really was possible to die from embarrassment. Finally realizing Alex was talking to her, she gazed into those eyes and was lost, drowning in a sea of green. “Huh? I’m sorry, what?”

  “Don’t you think one-on-one sex is better?”

  Sam’s eyes left Alex’s face and shifted slightly left, focusing on Jade, who leaned past Alex and mouthed, “Answer!”

  Her focus returned to the green eyes in front of her. “Ah…yes, much better. It’s much better, to…ah, have sex with one person at a time.” What shade of red was her face at this moment? Scarlet? Crimson? Candy apple?

  “Well, I’m glad we agree.” Alex’s lips quirked up at the corners and her eyes danced with mirth.

  Suddenly, Sam’s seat felt warm and something caused a small pool of moisture in her panties. Probably the cushion on the chair. Damn microfleece.

  “Which of these designs do you like best?”

  Sam tried to cool down and concentrate. She picked a few interesting ones and Alex spent the next half an hour discussing how to bring those ideas to life. When they finished going over all the details, Alex walked outside to measure.

  Jade slapped the table. “That was a disaster. What the hell were you doing?”

  “Me?” Sam pointed an emphatic finger at Jade. “I was gonna get you a lobster bib you were drooling so much!”

  “She must think we are complete and utter morons.”

  “She obviously sleeps around. And she’s out of my league sexually. I mean, a three-way? Who
has three-ways?”

  “She does, apparently!”

  “Well, that’s intimidating as hell.”

  “Stop it. You’re fine. You’re Samantha Cassidy. Emmy-award-winning actress. Alex should be shaking in her boots just to meet you.”

  “Well, that’s not what’s happening, in case you haven’t noticed. I’m the one who can barely look her in the eye.”

  “Why did you keep saying you have a boyfriend?”

  Sam winced. “I panicked. She makes me nervous.”

  “Do you think she’s attractive?”

  “Hell, yes! She’s…extremely attractive. Those eyes. You know how I love green eyes.”

  “Well, okay. Come hell or high water, she’s gonna be your fuck buddy.”

  Alex came back inside and gathered up her things.

  Jade’s phone rang. “I have to get this. Alex, it was nice seeing you again. We look forward to hearing from you.” She waved goodbye.

  Sam was left to show Alex out. Time to channel her inner Callie. Be strong. Be confident. They walked to the front door. “Do you have our contact info?”

  “Yeah, I have Jade’s phone number and email.”

  “Let me give you mine.”

  Alex handed Sam her iPhone. “Type it in my contacts.”

  Sam’s nervous fingers kept hitting all the wrong numbers and letters. After much backspacing and deleting, she handed the phone back. “You can email me the prices, or call, whichever is best for you.”

  “Great. Here’s my card. You can call or text if you think of something we didn’t cover today.” Alex leaned against the doorjamb. “Probably take me a few days to put something together.”

  Sam took the card, and when their fingers brushed, it felt electric. Schoolgirl crush, that’s what it felt like. At twenty-eight. How pathetic. “Sorry about all that. You probably think we’re nuts.”

  “No, I don’t. I was flattered, to be honest.”

  Sam drew a shaky breath. This woman was a cool customer. So out of her league.

  Alex continued to stare. “You have beautiful eyes. I’m sure you hear that all the time.”

  Sam felt another blush coming. “Me? God, no, you…you have the beautiful eyes. Green eyes are my fav—are great. Really great.”