The Bookseller's Boyfriend

by Heidi Cullinan

  “What’s to say it’ll get destroyed?”

  “Logic and reason.” Jacob sat up and looked Gina levelly in the eye. “Yes, I think he wanted to take me to bed last night, and that alone has rattled the foundations of all my fortresses. But that doesn’t mean he wanted to date me, and even if he did, I’d be a lark while he taught here, at best. Meanwhile, it would be a struggle for me to maintain a friendship with him without dragging in all the stars I have in my eyes over him. I’m sure I’ll run into him in town from time to time while he’s here, and that’ll be thrilling enough. Anything more wouldn’t be fair to either of us.”

  Gina huffed. “If you ask me, you’re far too logical and reasonable for your own good. You should take a chance with him.”

  “I don’t take chances, which you know very well.”

  “You used to.”

  That was true, he acknowledged as he finished up his inventory and made himself a cup of coffee in the small office behind the cash register. People who had known him since he was young, especially adults who had been contemporaries of his parents, liked to tease him about how nobody would have ever expected the wild child who had been Jacob Moore to not only come home to Copper Point but become such an upstanding citizen. If he’d told his teenage or even college self he’d be sitting on the hospital board and would be considering taking up leadership in the Copper Point Chamber of Commerce, he’d have laughed in his own face. Back then he’d been determined to go anywhere but here. He’d gotten out too, and had put his foot firmly on the business ladder in Chicago.

  And then everything had changed.

  He was still in the office when his phone rang. It was Gus. Jacob grimaced, hoping this wasn’t about the Instagram posts.

  It wasn’t. It was about the Facebook videos.

  “I didn’t know you had moves like that,” Gus said after describing an absolutely sensationalized account of what had happened. “And you told me you were going to take a bath and read a book!”

  “I was going to do that, yes. But Evan called, and I couldn’t say no.”

  “Who would want to if that guy was going to be your date? Man, but he’s hot. Now I wish I’d gone to the gala. Everybody at GAG is saying the same thing. Jared is bragging it up on Copper Point People too. He was one of the people who posted video. Clark is fuming, apparently, but you look like you were having so much fun, I think it was worth it.”

  Jacob set his teeth. Et tu, Jared? “Why is our pediatrician the worst gossip in town?”

  “Is it true, though? Are you dating him?”

  “I already told you, I escorted him as a favor to Evan.”

  “You didn’t say, actually. So Evan set you up? Bold, and awesome of him, to fix the guy up with a male date.”

  Jacob was about to protest it had not been a date when Gina stuck her head into the office, looking even bouncier than she’d been when she came in. “Sweetheart, you should probably come out here.”

  Why? They weren’t open yet. But something in Gina’s face brooked no argument. “I gotta go. I’ll call you later,” he told Gus.

  Gina gestured wildly as he stood and pocketed his phone. “Come on, hurry. I think there’s going to be a riot if you don’t let him in.”

  “What’s going on?” he asked as he followed Gina out of the office. “Let who—”

  He stopped as he saw the front of the store, the huge crowd of people filling the sidewalk in front of the door. Every last one of them had their phone out, and all the devices were aimed at the individual standing at the top of the ramp, on the other side of the antique door, peering at Jacob through the glass.

  Obviously it was Rasul.

  He looked incredibly nervous and delectably disheveled.

  Butterflies leaping around his insides, Jacob unlocked the door and pulled it open enough to regard Rasul without obstruction. He wanted to ask what was going on, but the cameras made him uneasy, so he simply raised his eyebrows.

  “Can I please come in and talk to you?” Rasul spoke low enough there was no way anything he said would end up on the many videos being taken.

  At least, Jacob hoped so.

  Rasul smelled just the way he had the night before, except now he was slightly rumpled and had the tiniest hint of sweat. Jacob’s entire body reacted on a visceral level.

  Clearing his throat, he opened the door wider and let Rasul in.

  AS JACOB locked the door and tugged down all the shades, Rasul noticed the man was back in Mr. Rogers gear again. It was probably some strange side effect of a night of insomnia in the terrible apartment followed by another call from Elizabeth, but this morning Rasul found it hot.

  The tinkling of the bell as the door closed soothed him, and the book smell of the store settled the ragged edges of his soul. Honestly, he might have slept if he’d been able to make a nest between the stacks. He wondered if there was any chance that could happen.

  Probably not, given what he was about to ask. Jacob didn’t seem happy even before Rasul brought it up, and something told him it wasn’t entirely because his business was besieged by Rasul’s fans, though likely that didn’t help much.

  A brightly smiling plump woman with light auburn hair that was probably dyed beamed near the checkout desk. “Want me to duck out so you two can talk, or are you going upstairs?”

  Jacob glanced at the clock on the wall, then at the door. “We’re supposed to open soon.”

  The woman waved a hand. “I’ll take care of that. You boys go chat.” She crossed to Rasul with her hand extended. “Gina Wilkerson. Pleasure to meet you.”

  He accepted her handshake with a smile that was soft and warm. “Rasul Youssef. Likewise.”

  “I know who you are. I love your work.” She said it calmly, as if complimenting him on his shirt. Not false praise, just not… the young ladies in front of the shop. To Jacob, she suggested with a smile, “Why don’t you two head upstairs and have a cup of tea?”

  The idea of sitting in that delightful kitchen again, combined with another cup of Earl Grey, sounded like heaven to Rasul. “Sounds good to me, if it’s all right with you.”

  Jacob looked unsure, but he nodded and led Rasul through the shop to the door he’d unlocked the day before.

  No cat sat on the stairs this time, though all three of the ones he’d seen previously sat in or near a window in the kitchen where morning sunlight streamed through. The tabby occupied what seemed to be the prime spot, glaring at the longhair who ignored her from the other end of the long window, nestled between several plants. Moriarty sat on the far end of the table, looking as if he were plotting how to vie for his own space but wasn’t quite ready to hatch the plan.

  Jacob went straight to the counter, where he filled the electric kettle. “What type of tea would you like? The Earl Grey again?”

  He’d noticed what type of tea Rasul drank. Why that pleased him so much, he didn’t know. “That would be perfect, thank you.” Moving cautiously toward Moriarty, he extended a hand for inspection, smiling as the cat sniffed him cautiously. The tabby stopped glaring at the longhair and turned its ire on Rasul, making it clear there was absolutely no room in the window for him. As Rasul stroked the black cat’s cheek, he offered his other hand to the tabby, waiting as she decided what to do with it. He grinned as she allowed him to stroke her too, then laughed as the longhair shifted position to sniff him. “I love your cats. What are names of the other two? I already was introduced to Moriarty.”

  Glancing over his shoulder, Jacob softened slightly. “The longhair is Mr. Nancy. The tabby is Susan Sto Helit.”

  “Excellent cat names.”

  Mr. Nancy meowed softly and pawed at Rasul’s face.

  “He wants you to hold him,” Jacob said as he fussed with a pot and tea leaves. “Don’t feel obligated, but if you do, be aware he’ll nip your chin as a sign of affection. He does that to everyone, but he especially loves beards.”

  “He likes to be picked up? Really?”

  “Really. He has a
lot of fans in the children’s department.”

  Rasul let go of the other two cats and held out his hands to Mr. Nancy, who meowed again and then all but leapt into Rasul’s arms. He laughed as he cradled the cat to his chest and, yes, received a series of nibbles on his beard. “I’ve never seen a cat who wants to be picked up.”

  “All three of them are originals, but I suppose most cats are, in their own ways.”

  Moriarty leapt immediately into the place Mr. Nancy had vacated. Cradling the cat closer to his chest, Rasul crossed to the counter beside Jacob and leaned against it. “So, first of all, I’m sorry about the scene outside.”

  Jacob cast a confused glance at him. “Why? Are you saying you invited them?”

  “God, no. But if I weren’t… me, they wouldn’t be there.”

  Jacob shrugged. “Gina will get them all to buy books, so it’s fine.”

  Okay, not the reaction he expected. He scritched the back of the cat’s head. “Do you have many of mine in stock? I could do an impromptu signing.”

  “I have about thirty of each. People have been interested in picking them up ever since they heard you were coming, but I assumed more would be curious once you arrived.”

  “Well, like I said, I’m happy to sign them, and that’s a standing offer.” He shifted the cat slightly. “That wasn’t why I came here, however. I have something I need to ask you.”

  Jacob kept fussing with the pot and cups in a way that made it clear he was distracting himself. “I’m listening.”

  Where to start? The beginning, he supposed. “I told you a little of this last night, how I’m behind on turning this book in. I mean, I think the whole world knows that. But it’s causing a lot of trouble for my agent and my publisher. My agent is ready to chuck me out the door, and I live in fear that my publisher will ask for the advance back because of my failure to deliver.”

  Jacob turned to him, suddenly focused. “Do you still have the money?”

  Rasul snorted. “No.” Sighing, he shut his eyes and submitted to another round of Mr. Nancy’s nips of love. “I’ve compounded everything by being visible to the public while I’m not writing. For a while I could get away with saying I was trying to find inspiration, but it’s gone on too long. And I just can’t sit in a room and force myself to work. I’ve tried, believe me. So Elizabeth—my agent—came up with the idea that I should come teach somewhere remote where I couldn’t get into trouble. She was hoping the experience might be focusing for me. I had my doubts, but I was willing to try anything at this point. So I came here. But I panicked at the last minute and got back together with an ex, and not only did I miss my initial flight north, I was also plastered all over the gossip sites. This infuriated Elizabeth so much she confiscated my phone. Then, as you know, there was the incident here yesterday. There was another last night after you left. And now this stuff outside this morning.”

  He put the cat down and paced a bit, the nerves starting to get to him. “Adina is playing some kind of game, which isn’t surprising but is a big problem.” How did he explain Adina? “I actually like her, even though she does some questionable things. If she would apply the hustle she has for cultivating a social media presence into getting gigs as a model, she’d have an incredible career. But she dreams of being an influencer, and I guess I was good for that route when we were dating. Then I got back together with her and it spiked again. So now she’s telling everyone we’re still dating, it’s in secret. We’re not dating, and I don’t think she actually cares about me. Just her fame.”

  Jacob frowned at the tea. “That’s a bit rude.”

  “Yeah, well. She might have been able to make it work, but she shot herself in the foot by sending people to keep tabs on me last night. They saw the two of us dancing instead.”

  “And now they’re outside the bookstore?”

  “Yes. I guess Adina has posted again, insisting this is a farce, you and I. Which….” He ran a hand through his hair. “Anyway, the bottom line is that Adina is messing up an already tense situation for me.”

  Jacob finished pouring the hot water and turned around to face Rasul. “Can you talk to her about it?”

  “Wouldn’t do any good. It’s attention she wants, and she’s decided I’m a good way to get it.”

  “So in addition to rude, she’s callous and inconsiderate.”

  Rasul shrugged. “Yeah, but I can’t cast too many stones. She’s my go-to bad choice path. We’ve gotten together and broken up six times now, and every time it’s like I’m willingly leaping into the snake pit, thinking somehow this time it’ll be full of sinful goodness that will set me free. We’re the worst match for each other, but neither of us is good at quitting.” He sighed. “But none of that matters. Well, it does, because it’s the problem, but I just made a bigger one.” He fidgeted, hating himself worse than when the original sin had fallen out of his mouth. “My agent saw the social media blowup—” He stopped, realizing, and glanced at Jacob. “Oh, wow. You’re not online much, you said, so maybe you don’t—”

  “Gina showed me.” Jacob didn’t look at all happy about it. “Apparently several people at the gala uploaded photos and video. Some of them are my friends, which I apologize for. Believe me, I’ll be having a word with them later.”

  Rasul resumed pacing, a slow, agitated meander back and forth across the kitchen tile. It was cream-colored with faint red and blue flowers and scrolling greenery. He loved it. He also loved that this morning he saw a few errant cat hairs that hadn’t yet been whisked away. It felt like he’d been let a bit behind the curtain. “Well… anyway, my agent called me last night because of the photos and video.” His stomach knotted and he leaned against the doorway between the kitchen and the living room. “And I did a stupid thing.”

  After the pause went on too long, Jacob asked, “And the stupid thing is?”

  Rasul didn’t want to say it, but he had to. He didn’t even know how to spin it. Say it, apologize, and see what happens. “I… told her you and I were going out.”

  Jacob didn’t say anything, didn’t even gasp in shock, which Rasul took as a very bad sign.

  He hurried to fill the dead air. “It slipped out. It’s horrible of me. Presumptuous, awful, rude, inconsiderate—” everything you said Adina was. He winced. “I’m sorry to say, that’s me when I get in a bad place. I think it was the apartment that did it.”

  “Apartment?” Jacob blinked in confusion.

  “Yes. The apartment. My awful one, your amazing one.” Rasul gestured accusingly at the space around him. “Look at this. Why do you have such an amazing space? I can’t even determine what it smells like, but I want to bottle it and wear a sachet of it around my neck so I smell it all the time. Meanwhile my place is horrible and sterile and stinks like grease, and I can’t sleep there. All I can do is think about your space and how much I want to write a novel in it.”

  “You… told your agent you’re dating me because of my apartment?” Jacob spoke slowly, as if trying to make something nonsensical logical.

  Out with it. All of it. “I told her that because I keep thinking about you. Your apartment, your bookstore, your Mr. Rogers sweaters, your way of talking about my work, your way of being all buttoned-up except sometimes you’re not, and I want… more of that. Which I’d been thinking about how to make happen anyway, and then Elizabeth called getting angry at me again, and I couldn’t even check what she was looking at because I don’t have Wi-Fi set up yet, and… I blurted out that we were dating.”

  Rasul slid down the doorway to the floor, drawing his knees to his chest. Mr. Nancy immediately jumped on top of them and tried to bite his beard again. Rasul let him.

  Meanwhile, Jacob fussed with pouring the tea. “So is that why you’ve come here? To ask me out? Or try to muscle me out of my apartment?”

  Rasul tipped his head back, letting his gaze sweep the space around him. “I mean, both? Not muscle you out, though, more worm my way in with you remaining.”

  “I’m
not looking for a roommate.” Jacob set the teapot back down on its trivet. “And I’m not going to date you.”

  That hurt more than he’d expected. “Because of the crappy way I asked and how I told my agent first?”

  “Because I don’t want to.”

  Double ouch. “Ah.” He didn’t know what else to say.

  Jacob came over with the two cups and, to Rasul’s surprise, folded himself gracefully to the floor beside Rasul. He handed him tea with the same calmness he’d exhibited since he’d opened the door of the bookshop. “I think there’s more to your story. How did your agent react when you said we were dating?”

  Rasul clutched his cup in his palms, willing the warmth to seep into him. “She wanted an explanation, and details. So I told her the truth. She already knew about the part where people tried to shanghai me at the store, or whatever it was Adina had inspired them to do, but I told her how you ended up also being my arranged escort and… well. She liked that you’d been hand-picked by the dean.” He clutched harder at the tea. “I almost came to legitimately ask you out last night, but I got the feeling you wanted to be alone, so I didn’t.”

  “I did want to be alone, and thank you for noticing.” He nudged Rasul’s knee. “Drink your tea before it’s cold.”

  Rasul did. It was as good as the day before. “But now you’re angry with me?”

  Jacob also sipped his tea. “I’m not. Perhaps a bit annoyed, but there’s a distinct difference.”

  “But you don’t want to date me?”

  “I don’t. Though that has nothing to do with your agent, your lie, or the girls outside.”

  Rasul set his cup aside. “Seriously? Because I really thought we had something going last night. Was I completely off?”

  “You weren’t wrong. But for many reasons, all of which are my own business, I don’t want to date you. Which is part of why I left when I did.” Jacob sipped again. “That said, I appreciate your current dilemma and am open to helping you solve it, with some ground rules.”