Times of Our Lives

by Jane Waterton

  Jenny hesitated. “Well, nothing is absolute in medicine, Allie…”

  “But it’s a distinct possibility, isn’t it?” Allie said shortly.

  Jenny nodded reluctantly. “Yes, I have to say, it would have made a huge difference.”

  Allie stood suddenly and walked back over to the mantle, her fists tightly clenched. Concerned, Jenny rose and joined her.

  “Allie,” she said softly. “I can’t make any guarantees, but if it was someone I loved, I would want the team we have doing the operation.”

  Taking a deep breath, Allie turned to face her. “Thank you. I’m sure Meg will be in wonderful hands.”

  Jenny watched Allie struggling to maintain her composure. “Do you have any more questions? Is there anything else I can tell you?”

  Allie shook her head briefly. “No, I’m fine. It’s all very clear.”

  Jenny picked up her bag to leave. “Let me know when you get to the hospital. I know the specialist will have already spoken to Meg by now, but I am more than happy to talk to the two of you together and answer any questions.”

  Allie walked Jenny to the door. Opening it, she turned to face her with a polite smile. “Thank you for coming to let me know.”

  Jenny frowned, unsettled by Allie’s sudden change in demeanour. “It’s a lot to absorb, but the good news is, we’ve got a great team, and Meg’s a fighter.”

  Watching Jenny wave as she drove away, Allie felt her anger simmering just below the surface.

  “Damn you, Meg Sullivan,” she said through gritted teeth, slamming the door. “Damn you for lying to me.”

  Allie stood with her forehead pressed against the closed door, trying to steady her breathing, working hard to subdue her anger. After a few moments, she took a deep breath and began to gather the few belongings she had brought over.

  The anger she felt at Meg’s behaviour, her ongoing denials that anything was wrong, affected her more deeply than she could have imagined. Through the numbness, she could feel a deep, swirling fury resonating through her body, looking for an escape. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hold it in much longer and she urgently needed to get out of Meg’s home. As she picked up her things from the bed, she inadvertently knocked the photo of the two of them to the floor; the glass smashed. Looking down in horror at the shattered photograph, Allie choked back a sob and fled back to her own cottage.

  CHAPTER 18

  “Ms Sullivan, can you hear me? Wake up now…Ms Sullivan,” the nurse called, leaning over her patient.

  Meg groaned, eyes slowly fluttering open. As panic began to seep into her consciousness, she felt the reassuring touch of warm fingers on her arm.

  “It’s all right, you’re in post op and you’ve come through the surgery very well. We’re just going to take you up to ICU.”

  Through a foggy haze, Meg felt like a lead weight was pressing on her chest. Somewhere in the distance, she registered there was pain. She tried to speak, but something in her throat prevented her from making any sound. As terror threatened to overwhelm her again, she brought her free hand up to her face, reaching for the breathing tubes.

  The nurse gently took her hand and held it in place on the bed. “It’s all right,” she said reassuringly. “It’s just a tube to help you breathe. Don’t try and talk just yet.”

  Giving up the battle, Meg lapsed back into sleep.

  When she next opened her eyes, Meg was aware of Jenny Wilcox smiling at her from the side of her bed.

  “Well, it is nice to see you back in the land of the living, Meg.”

  Meg tried to speak, but Jenny laid a hand on her arm and shook her head.

  “Don’t try and speak just yet. I just need to check you, and the nurses need to finish getting you settled. Do you understand what I am saying?”

  Meg nodded weakly.

  “OK, I just need to check the stitches in your chest. It may feel a little uncomfortable, but I will be as quick and gentle as possible.”

  Meg nodded, trying hard to stay awake.

  “Just try and hang on for a bit longer, Meg. I need to make sure that everything is okay.”

  Meg felt cool air as her chest was examined.

  Apparently satisfied with her assessment, Jenny removed her gloves and spoke calmly, “Meg, the nurse is going to take your temperature and blood pressure and then we’re done.”

  Within a few moments, the preliminaries were finished. The nurse spooned several ice chips from a cup on the bedside table into Meg’s mouth. “Suck these slowly. It will help with the raspiness you are feeling.”

  Clearing her throat cautiously, Meg looked expectantly at the doctor.

  “So, how did it go?” she croaked out in a whisper.

  Jenny finished writing on Meg’s chart, then sat on the chair next to the bed.

  “Well, the surgeon is going to come see you tomorrow, but I can tell you that he was very pleased. It was a long operation, but it went like clockwork.”

  Meg closed her eyes, her thoughts going to Allie; she still didn’t understand why her best friend had not been to see her before the operation.

  “Can I have visitors?” she rasped.

  “While you are here in ICU, maybe one at a time, but for no more than five minutes each. You’ve been through a major trauma and you’re going to need a great deal of recovery time.” Seeing Meg’s eyes start to close, Jenny patted her hand. “For now, though, just sleep and regain your strength.”

  Meg had so many questions she wanted to ask, but she couldn’t seem to stay awake. Maybe if she just closed her eyes, things would start to make sense...

  CHAPTER 19

  Louise unlocked her office while digging her mobile phone out of her bag. Seeing Caro’s number, she smiled.

  “Hey, sweetheart, how’s the Big Smoke?”

  Caro was in Sydney for three days as a guest speaker at an international conference. “Busy, smoggy and humid, but apart from that, glorious.”

  Louise laughed. While she would always choose the country, she knew her partner still occasionally hankered for the fast city life. “Well, kick up your heels and enjoy it. You don’t get there very often.”

  “Probably just as well. Have you any idea how expensive this damned city is? I’d need three jobs just to keep me in shoes.”

  Louise nodded. “Listen, darling, I rang you earlier to let you know that I’ve heard Meg has come out of the operation and she’s responding well; very sore of course, but apparently the doctors are really pleased.”

  “Thank goodness.” Caro sighed audibly. “I’ve been wondering how it went. I was going to ring you, but assumed you’d let me know when you heard something.”

  “I thought I’d see if Allie is home and get some more information from her,” Louise replied, sitting back in her chair and putting her feet up on the desk.

  “Now the operation is done and Meg’s recovering, I’m sure she’ll be keen to visit.”

  Louise gazed thoughtfully out of her office window. “Mmm, I hope so. It was odd that she refused to see Meg before the operation.”

  “Well, go see her and I’m sure she’ll be fine. It was a pretty scary scenario for her; she probably felt more in control by staying away. Listen, I have to get back to the conference. I’ll talk to you tonight.”

  After hanging up, Louise sat motionless at her desk for several minutes, thinking about her conversation with Caro. She felt there was something more going on with Allie and it worried her. Keen to put her mind at rest, she decided to walk over and have a quick chat. If it was as Caro said, she would probably be at the hospital anyway.

  Louise was surprised when Allie answered the door.

  “Louise.” Allie smiled in welcome. “What a lovely surprise. Come in. I’ve just made a batch of biscuits.”

  Louise entered the cottage and was immediately assailed by the wonderfu
l smell of baking. “Oh, Allie, and this is the week I was planning to start my diet,” she said with a laugh.

  “Phooey.” Allie waved away the excuse. “You have to at least help, otherwise I’ll end up eating them all and they’ll be lifting me out of here with a crane.”

  Louise settled herself at the kitchen bench while Allie prepared the tea, and the two discussed favourite recipes. When she handed Louise her cup, Allie suggested sitting under the pergola. “I’ve been inside all day; I desperately need to be outside for a while.”

  As they made themselves comfortable outside, Allie asked with a smile, “So, what brings you for a visit?”

  Louise took a sip of the fragrant tea. “Well, I heard that Meg was out of her operation and, although still in ICU, doing well. I was wondering if you had any more news?”

  Allie slowly placed her cup on the table and looked across at Louise. “No,” she said coldly.

  Louise’s shock must have registered on her face. “I…I just thought…” she stammered.

  A flash of irritation crossed Allie’s face. “I haven’t seen Meg or been in contact with her since before the operation. I’m sorry, Louise, but it’s personal and none of anyone’s business. It’s wonderful to see you, and I’m more than happy to talk to you about anything else, but I will not discuss Meg.”

  Louise’s biscuit stuck in her throat and she quickly took a swallow of tea. Giving a gentle cough, she tried desperately to think of something to say.

  Allie softened her tone. “Louise, it’s…OK. I know you are trying to help, but please, don’t. What’s done is done.” Allie shrugged.

  Louise looked at her. “Are you alright? Do you need anything?”

  Allie gave a tight smile and shook her head. “Just to not talk about this, please.”

  Flustered and embarrassed, Louise nodded. “Of course, sorry…”

  When she finished her tea, unable to cope with the undercurrent of tension any longer, Louise rose. “I’d better get back to the office. Caro’s away and I have a mountain of paperwork.” Seeing Allie rise, Louise motioned her back into her chair. “No, stay here in the sun. I can let myself out. Thanks for the tea. I’ll…see you soon.”

  Once back out front, Louise blew out a huge breath. “What the hell was that about?” she asked herself quietly.

  In the hope of getting to the truth, she walked slowly to Pat and Bella’s.

  Pat greeted her at the door. “Louise, come in.”

  “I just wanted to call in and say hello. I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” Louise said as she followed Pat into the sunny living room.

  “Louise.” Bella rose from the sofa to give her a hug. “How wonderful to see you.”

  Louise looked affectionately at the two women. “Well, you’re both certainly looking better than the last time I saw you,” she said with delight.

  “Sit, sit,” Bella said. “Can we make you a cup of tea?”

  Louise shook her head. “No, I just had one with Allie…in fact, that’s sort of why I’m here.”

  Pat sat on the arm of Bella’s chair.

  Louise frowned. “I heard that Meg got out of surgery this morning, and I walked over to see if Allie had any more information. When I arrived she was fine, chatting and laughing, but the minute I asked about Meg, there was this shutter that slammed down, completely blocking everything. She not only resolutely refused to discuss her, but was obviously angry when I asked. I know it’s really none of my business, but I’m concerned. Do you two know what’s going on?”

  Pat and Bella exchanged looks.

  Seeing their awkwardness, Louise leant forward. “No, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. It’s personal and I don’t want to put you in a difficult situation.”

  Pat rubbed her hand over her short hair. “To tell you the truth, Louise, we are as concerned as you are. Apparently, Allie discovered that Meg’s operation was very likely avoidable.”

  Louise frowned. “I don’t understand. She had a serious problem with one of her heart valves.”

  Pat nodded. “Yes, but what you probably don’t know, and what Allie didn’t know until just before Meg’s op, was that if she had told someone about her symptoms when they first started happening, it’s very possible it would have been able to be fixed with fairly minor surgery. Instead, Meg kept denying the symptoms until her heart finally gave up.”

  Louise sat back as the pieces began falling into place. “And Allie’s angry that Meg didn’t tell her,” she said slowly.

  “Furious and deeply hurt,” Bella replied. “Allie had begun to notice something was wrong almost four months ago and despite repeated questioning, Meg kept denying it and brushing her off.”

  Louise frowned. “But why? Why would Meg risk her life like that?”

  “Meg has a hatred of illness. She grew up with a mother who made illness an occupation. She sees it as a weakness, not always in others, but certainly in herself.” Pat shrugged. “It’s likely she didn’t realise the seriousness of the symptoms. It’s not the first time she’s done this and it’s driven Allie crazy in the past, but this may actually be the final straw. She arrived on our doorstep after the conversation with Jenny. We’ve never seen her so distressed and angry.”

  “Well, she was pretty upset when I brought the subject up. I didn’t know what to say.”

  Bella nodded. “She needs to work this through, but it’s going to take some time.” Glancing up at Pat, Bella frowned. “The other problem is going to be trying to explain it all to Meg. At this stage she’s only allowed one or two visitors a day, but once they take her out of ICU, she’s really going to start wondering where Allie is. Pat and I will tell her, but not yet. She’s got enough on her plate and we don’t want her to have any setbacks.”

  Louise agreed. Rising to her feet, she said, “Well, ladies, I should leave you to your afternoon and get back to work. Thanks for filling me in, and I will keep it confidential. I plan to call in to see Meg later in the week.”

  “We’re scheduled for tomorrow, fifteen minutes only, but it will be great to see her and confirm she is on the mend. When she asked them about the recovery period, the doctors did warn her that one of the side effects, apparently, was that she might be grumpy. They obviously didn’t know her before the operation,” Bella said with a laugh.

  CHAPTER 20

  Daphne wrapped her hands around Sparrow’s small fingers, gently adjusting her grip on the fishing rod. She was trying to teach Sparrow the finer points of beach fishing, one of her favourite pastimes. Sparrow had expressed an interest in learning, so they could share the hobby together. However, much to Sparrow’s frustration, Daphne’s fishing rods were proving far too big for her to manage.

  Daphne was valiantly trying to supress her laughter at the hilarious results of Sparrow’s attempts at casting. It was like watching one of those funniest home video movies, she decided, as Sparrow ended up each time with either a hook entangled in her hair, the bait flying off the hook or the line tangling. Eventually, after a rare successful cast, Sparrow gave a shriek of excitement when she felt something large tug on her line. She eagerly reeled in her catch, only to find a huge clump of seaweed hanging from her hook.

  Visibly deflated, Sparrow stomped across the sand to sit on the picnic blanket. She pointedly ignored Daphne, who gave up trying not to laugh. Giggling uncontrollably, she walked over to Sparrow, lay the beach rod on the sand and sat down.

  “Don’t get so upset, honey. We just need to get you a smaller rod next time we’re in town.”

  Sparrow pouted, unwilling to be so quickly mollified. “I just thought it would be nice to share this with you because it is something you enjoy so much.”

  “Well, you don’t have to fish. If you wanted to, we could just come down to the beach and I could fish while you…read or something.”

  Daphne repositioned herself behind Sparrow, dra
wing her small body between her legs and back against her chest.

  “What is it about fishing that you love so much?” Sparrow asked, leaning back into her embrace.

  Daphne rested her chin gently on Sparrow’s head and stared out at the ocean, thinking about her response. “I have always loved the ocean, ever since I was a kid. If I’m distressed, or upset, I find that just sitting watching the movement of the waves soothes me like nothing else. When I’m fishing it’s just me; me and the sea. It’s not about what I catch. Mostly I throw them back. It’s just about being part of the rhythm of the ocean. It allows me to think, clear my mind and get centred again.”

  Sparrow tilted her head back, looking up at her lover with a smile. “Remember you told me when we first started going out together, that everything happens for a reason?”

  Daphne nodded.

  “Well, that’s why my trying to fish is such a disaster.”

  Daphne frowned, “I’m not sure I understand…”

  Sparrow sat up, turned and faced her. “The main thing about fishing for you is solitude. You said you get centred, just you and the ocean. That is incredibly important. If I join you, then that all changes and it becomes just another thing we share.”

  “But it’s important that we share things, isn’t it?” Daphne asked, trying to understand.

  “Of course it is, but not at the expense of something that is such a basic need for you. We can share lots of things, but we also need to remember that we need our alone time as well. One of those things for you is fishing. It’s your alone time. It’s that simple.”

  Daphne pondered what Sparrow was saying, and realised she was right.

  “So, you don’t mind if I go fishing by myself?” she asked cautiously.

  Sparrow tilted up and kissed Daphne. “Of course not, especially if you bring fresh fish home sometimes.”

  “Just say the word and you can have all the fresh fish I can catch you.”

  Sparrow stretched. “Feel like a swim?” she asked.