Billionaire Unattainable

by J. S. Scott

  I understood what he was saying. The timing hadn’t been right, and they had all been struggling with the sudden death of their parents.

  “And after that?” It had been many years since his parents had died. Certainly there had been opportunities for him to share this with his siblings.

  “For a couple of years, I couldn’t do it because they were still mourning our parents. Then, all of us drifted apart. We dealt with their passing in different ways. After so many years had passed, it really didn’t seem to matter. My brothers and sisters have been through a lot. It never seemed like a good time to lay something like that on them.”

  Oh, it mattered, but probably not to Carter, Jett, Harper, or Dani.

  It mattered to Mason.

  A lot.

  Now that I knew the truth, I realized his behavior was very similar to what I’d suggested to him at his house, and maybe I’d hit a nerve that had caused him to shut down. Mason worked to prove he deserved to be a Lawson because he wasn’t one by blood. Sure, the siblings were all still blood-related through their mother, so they were half siblings. But obviously Mason still seemed motivated to show that he was willing to work harder than anybody else to have the right to claim the Lawson name.

  Didn’t he realize he didn’t have to prove a single damn thing? He was his father’s son. Period. And I knew Jett and Carter well enough to safely say that they wouldn’t give a damn if Mason wasn’t related by blood at all. He’d still be their brother. Nothing would change that bond between them.

  My heart ached for the young man who had abruptly learned that he didn’t have his father’s blood flowing through his veins. At that age, and with no warning, he must have been completely devastated.

  Add the fact that Mason’s real father had been a rapist, and it wasn’t hard to figure out why he worked so damn hard to prove that he was worthy.

  “Do you think your father loved you any less because he wasn’t your natural father?” I ventured carefully.

  “No,” he said huskily. “I know he didn’t. He still considered me his firstborn son. He was there with Mom when I was born.”

  “Then why are you still trying to prove that you’re worthy, Mason? You’ve sacrificed everything else in your life to turn Lawson Technologies into a world leader. You’ve done that.”

  “My brothers worked hard, too,” he argued.

  “I don’t doubt that,” I told him. “But they’ve all found a life outside of Lawson now that it’s successful. Carter and Jett both mentioned that you hired upper management and a CEO a couple of years ago so you could all stop busting your asses and practically living in the office.”

  “We did,” he answered in a clipped tone. “And you should talk. You’re a workaholic, too.”

  I could hear the defensiveness in his voice, but I wasn’t backing down. This was way too important to just let Mason slide.

  “I am,” I confessed. “But only to a certain point. I don’t sacrifice my relationships with my friends for work. My workaholic tendencies come from a place of wanting financial security. You know my history. Plus, I love what I do. Sometimes I get really caught up in my designs because it’s my passion.”

  Mason’s motivation was far different than mine. He still felt like he had to work every minute of the day. So he’d lived, eaten, and breathed Lawson Technologies since his parents had died.

  The guy was driven by his own demons, and he wasn’t going to stop until… “You should tell them, Mason.”

  “Why bother at this point?” he rasped. “Do you think they deserve to know I’m not really a Lawson?”

  “That’s bullshit, and you know it,” I said firmly. “You are a Lawson. You always have been. You don’t owe them the truth. You owe yourself the freedom of telling them the truth. You need to see that they aren’t going to give a damn what DNA you have.”

  I held my breath until he finally grumbled, “I’ll think about it.”

  I had to be happy with that, because I got the sense that he wasn’t ready to tell his siblings the truth quite yet. “Do you have any other siblings on your biological father’s side?”

  “No. The bastard died a year after I was born. Overdosed on drugs. If he hadn’t, I would have killed him for what he did to my mother.”

  I felt my eyes well up with tears. It was so obvious that Mason had adored both of his parents. So much so that he was still trying to please them long after their deaths.

  “They’d be so proud of you and what you’ve done with Lawson Technologies,” I said honestly. “But they’d want you to be happy, too. I’ll never tell anyone, Mason. That’s your secret to share. Not mine. You’ll do it when you’re ready.”

  “I believe you,” he replied. It was a moment before he added, “Are you going to forgive me for being a dick to you earlier?”

  I sighed. It obviously wasn’t easy for Mason to communicate on a personal level. Probably because he’d done a damn good job of isolating himself from everybody he cared about for so long by being a reclusive workaholic.

  Truthfully, I’d already forgiven him, but I wasn’t letting him off the hook that easily. “Weird,” I said contemplatively. “I must have missed the whole apology thing.”

  “You want me to say it?” he asked grumpily.

  “Yes. You hurt me.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said without hesitation, like he wanted to take away any injury he’d caused me as quickly as possible. “The last thing I’d ever want to do is hurt you, Laura.”

  He sounded so sincere that I had to swallow a lump in my throat.

  I was startled when a tear actually plopped onto my cheek and started to travel downward. I wiped it away as I realized I was actually crying. Again. What in the hell was wrong with me? “Forgiven,” I said, trying to hide the fact that Mason touched me on a level I didn’t completely understand.

  I felt him so hard that I swore he could reach into my body and tear out my soul when he was hurting over something.

  It wasn’t that I could see or hear that he was damaged. He was a master at covering up his emotions. But for some reason, I could feel it. I was connected to Mason in a way that I didn’t completely understand.

  “Have dinner with me tomorrow.” His statement was almost a question, but not quite. It was pretty much a command.

  I smiled. “Are you asking me out? Because if you are, your technique could use some work.”

  “I don’t have a technique,” he said gutturally. “And yeah, I was asking you out, but I’m not taking no for an answer. I’ll pick you up around seven?”

  “So you are flexible on time? But not my yes or no answer?”

  “Pretty much,” he confessed in a gruff tone. “Just put me out of my fucking misery and say yes.”

  He was being high-handed, but I hadn’t missed the small note of desperation in his voice that made me instantly say, “Yes. Seven o’clock is fine.”

  Mason

  Laura Hastings Blog Entry, Today, 9 a.m.

  Have you ever asked a question that you thought was coming from a good place, but you wished like hell that you could take it back after you asked it?

  I did. Yesterday. Although it worked out okay in the end, I guess I really need to learn that just because I’m ready to ask the question and be supportive, it doesn’t mean that person is ripe to answer. Not because they’re lying or trying to hide anything, but because they just haven’t found the answers yet themselves.

  I was immediately hurt because that person shut down when I asked something personal, because I was only trying to help. I crawled inside myself to lick my own wounds, not realizing that there was no hurt intended.

  In reality, I injured him by asking too much, too soon.

  I should have gotten to know him a little better before asking something really personal. And no, I’m not about to tell you all what I asked. : ) I’m just hoping you can learn from my stupid mistake.

  Have fun. Laugh. Make some good memories before you get too heavy with that new m
an in your life. Make sure that person has the chance to trust you before you distance them by rushing into something you shouldn’t.

  Lesson learned for me.

  Smile in the mirror at yourself at least once today. You’re beautiful, whether you know it or not.

  Xoxoxo ~ Laura

  It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know that Laura was referring to what had happened between us the night before in her blog post.

  I slammed my hand down on my desk after reading her blog entry for the second time that day. I’d initially looked at it this morning when I’d first checked my email.

  I’d just brought up the post again, trying to figure out how I could make up for the fact that I’d just shut her down without thinking about how that might make her feel.

  It wasn’t that I didn’t trust her. I just hadn’t wanted to talk about…that.

  “Fuck!” I cursed as I leaned back in my office chair.

  I didn’t want Laura to feel like she couldn’t say what she wanted to say. I didn’t want her to think I didn’t trust her.

  It wasn’t her.

  It was me.

  I didn’t actually trust anyone all that much. If you trusted somebody in the business world without having anything in writing, that made you a complete moron.

  Laura isn’t business. My relationship with her was personal, which was really the root of the entire problem.

  Regardless of the advice I’d gotten from Jett, I still didn’t know a damn thing about romancing a female.

  I was a ruthless bastard in business.

  I didn’t hesitate to do whatever it took for the sake of Lawson Technologies.

  My entire life was my business.

  I hadn’t even thought much about any particular female. Until her…

  If I actually had a choice, I’d still be buried in Lawson Technologies every minute of the day. But ever since I’d seen Laura, and started to read her blog posts, I’d been intrigued. That curiosity had now reached a point of obsession, and I had no fucking idea how to handle that. Or her.

  It wasn’t like I hadn’t tried for an entire year to get over my fascination with Laura Hastings. Now, I knew that wasn’t going to happen.

  Jett’s advice had been pretty simple: Get your mind off Lawson and focus on Laura. Care about how she feels and what she wants. And then let her know who you are.

  I scowled at the blog post again, and realized I’d been an epic fail when I’d shut her down last night.

  She thought she’d tried to get close to me too soon, when in reality, I wanted her to get just as close to me as she possibly could.

  Of course, my desires to be close to her included being naked, hot and sweaty.

  But I also had an intense desire to make her happy, to see her smile.

  So what in the hell did I need to do about that?

  And the gnawing pain in my gut to make her mine?

  I was pretty sure I was completely fucked.

  As much as I’d followed her blog and gleaned certain information about the kind of woman Laura was, I still had no idea what she wanted in a man.

  Which was why I’d straight out asked her.

  He has to be breathing. He has to have a good job. And he has to want…me.

  Hell, I’d met every one of those qualifications from day one.

  There had to be…more.

  Sure, I’d been relieved when she’d admitted that our attraction went both ways, but I wasn’t just attracted to Laura.

  I was fucking obsessed.

  Maybe if I can get her beautiful ass in my bed and fuck her until we’re both satisfied, my life can go back to the way it was before I met her.

  There was that hope that I could somehow make it back onto the sanity train once my need to possess her had been appeased.

  Honestly, I had no idea what would happen if I could actually get what I’d wanted for over a year now.

  The intercom on my desk buzzed, interrupting my train of thought. “Mr. Lawson, your sister is on the line,” my secretary said in her usual, professional voice.

  “Thanks. I got it,” I told her as I picked up the phone.

  “Mason, I know you’re probably busy,” my sister Dani said hesitantly. “But Harper and I are leaving tomorrow, and I hoped you and Carter could meet us for lunch.”

  Now that Jett and Ruby’s wedding was over, and the newlyweds had left for their European honeymoon, Dani and Harper were leaving to get back to their lives in Colorado.

  I could tell by the tone of her voice that my sister absolutely expected me to refuse. I always did. So why should she suppose she’d get a different answer today?

  I hesitated as I thought about what Laura had said the night before.

  It was all true. I had isolated myself from my family as much as possible because I was afraid they’d look at me differently if they knew I wasn’t one hundred percent their sibling. Not to mention the fact that my biological father was a sexual predator.

  Problem was, I’d been so busy avoiding my own possible rejection that I hadn’t once considered what kind of emotional pain it would cause for my siblings.

  However, I could recognize how much my distance had hurt them now. Harper and Dani were two of the strongest women I knew, and I’d think the same thing even if they weren’t my sisters.

  Now that I was really listening, I could hear the inflection of sadness in Dani’s voice.

  I’d done that.

  And I fucking hated myself for it.

  “Have you already called Carter?” I asked. I was done being a dick to my own sisters.

  “Not yet,” she answered. “But you know Carter. He’s always up for anything to bring us together these days.”

  Yeah, he was. After years of feeling responsible for Mom and Dad’s deaths simply because they were running an errand for him when the accident had occurred, Carter was moving on, and trying to bring everyone back together in the process. In some way, every one of us had isolated ourselves for various reasons. But Carter wanted his family close again. It was like a personal mission for him.

  Finally, I told Dani, “I’ll go drag him out of his office and bring him with me. Where are we meeting? I’m starving. So no damn girlie food.”

  “You’re really coming with Carter?” Dani replied, sounding stunned.

  I felt like an asshole as I realized how happily surprised my sister appeared to be. Almost like she didn’t believe me.

  “I missed breakfast today. And I’d like to see you and Harper before you go.” Strangely, I realized how true that statement actually was. For the most part, with Dani and Harper living in Colorado with their families, I didn’t get to see them all that often.

  “You really want to see us?” Dani asked hesitantly.

  Holy shit! Way to make a guy feel like an asshole.

  Then again, I probably deserved it.

  “Carter and I will be there. When and where?” I took a quick look at my watch.

  “Obviously, somewhere that they serve large portions if you and Carter are hungry,” she teased.

  “Definitely,” I affirmed. I wasn’t a salad type of guy.

  We made our plans to meet around one o’clock at a café and deli known for making man-sized sandwiches.

  Once I’d disconnected with Dani, I dialed Carter’s number.

  “Lunch,” I said, getting right to the point.

  “What?” Carter answered.

  “Lunch,” I repeated. “Meet me in the lobby in five minutes. We’re meeting Harper and Dani. They have to leave tomorrow. Don’t you want to see them before they go?”

  Stupid question. Of course Carter wants to see our younger sisters before they left for Colorado.

  “You’re actually leaving the office for a family lunch?”

  It annoyed me that he sounded so surprised. “Yes.”

  “Since when?” he asked drily.

  “Since today,” I grumbled. “Just get your ass to the lobby.”

  I swore I heard my
brother chuckle as I hung up the phone.

  Mason

  “Damn, you were chatty today,” Carter observed as he flopped into the chair across from my desk after lunch. “I don’t think you’ve ever asked Dani and Harper as many questions in an entire decade as you did today.”

  I sat down behind my desk as I answered, “I’m interested in their lives in Colorado. What’s wrong with that?”

  Carter shrugged. “Nothing. But it’s not normal for you. I know you keep an eye on both of them…from a distance. But you were asking them questions directly at lunch today. It’s just not like you.”

  “You said your goal was to get all of us close again, like we were when we were younger,” I reminded him.

  He grinned. “I didn’t think you were really listening.”

  Jesus Christ! Carter made me sound like a dick. Was I really that bad? “I was listening,” I said, feeling defensive. “I was just…busy.”

  “You’re always too damn busy,” Carter replied drily. “When in the hell are you going to slow it down, Mason? That was the agreement when we hired upper management and a CEO. All three of us were going to get a life. Well, I guess Jett already had one, but you and I were going to do it together. And as of now, I don’t see you out enjoying your life. For Christ’s sake, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you had an apartment here in the building. Do you ever see your house?”

  I took a deep breath before I answered, “As a matter of fact, yes. Yesterday. I was out of the office before dark.”

  “Yesterday was Sunday,” Carter retorted. “You shouldn’t have been here at all. No offense, man, but you’re killing yourself, and it’s time to sit back and enjoy the fruits of your labor. We all still work hard. But we don’t have to work that damn hard anymore.”

  “I’m working on it,” I grumbled, knowing Carter was right.

  I had agreed to pass everyday management to skilled leaders and a CEO. But I’d mostly done it so my brothers could take it a little easier.