I fan my face while Chloe looks like she might faint. “I’m trying to work out if that’s a threat or a promise,” Chloe admits.
“It’s a promise,” Jackson says, winking at me. “I don’t do threats.”
“He’s a keeper,” Chloe decides, tugging on my arm. “And I’m detouring to Jon’s place because I need his dick now.”
I fight a smile.
“Tell him he’s welcome,” Jackson calls out, chuckling, as she rushes off.
“Let me guess,” I say. “You were in the neighborhood?”
He steps closer, and I work hard to remain upright. “Something like that.”
“How often do you run?”
“Usually once a day. Sometimes more.” He lifts his hand, tracing the tip of his finger along my jawline. “I can’t stop thinking about you.”
“You can’t?” I’m sure he hears the disbelief in my tone.
He shakes his head. “Is this normal? I’ve no idea, and Hunt is fuck all help.”
I laugh. “Don’t ask me. I’m zero help too.”
We smile at one another, and it’s as if the ground is swaying under my feet.
Is this what it feels like when you’re falling? And can it happen this fast?
“Please tell me you have no plans.”
“For when?” I ask, licking my lips as his eyes suck me deeper into his orbit.
“The rest of your life,” he whispers, sliding his hand to my neck. His thumb skates back and forth across my throbbing pulse, and I’m putty in his hands.
“Jackson.” His name comes out in a whisper.
“I’m scaring you.” He removes his hand and steps back. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. I have no experience with all this, and it’s just you’ve come out of nowhere.”
“I’m a lot to handle,” he agrees, nodding. “How about takeout at our place later? I can come back for you.”
“Will Sawyer be there?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know his plans.”
“How about takeout at my place?” I suggest. “I mean, it’s not much, but it’s private, and I have a little balcony out back. We can eat there.”
“Perfect.” He tweaks my nose. “I’ll bring the food. You just bring your delectable self.”
“Okay.”
He leans down, pressing the softest, sweetest kiss to my lips, and I swoon on my feet. “See you in a couple hours, babe.”
_______________
The one good thing about living in a postage-sized studio apartment is the fact it is easy to keep it clean and tidy. I’ve always kept my shit neat anyway, but I don’t have to spend ages making my place presentable for Jackson, which means I have time to put new sheets on my bed, take a long hot shower, shave everywhere, put on a facemask, paint my nails, and set the small table out on the balcony before he arrives.
He is punctual, arriving one minute before eight, and I buzz him up, opening the small door at the top of the stairs, smiling as he locks the entrance door down below and climbs the steps two at a time.
“You look fucking gorgeous,” he says, his eyes skimming over the casual black knee-length summer dress I’m wearing with obvious admiration. I let my hair dry naturally, and it’s still a little damp, cascading in soft waves over my shoulders. I put tinted moisturizer on my face and added a touch of gloss, blush, and mascara.
“Thank you.” I stretch up, ignoring the butterflies in my chest and the slight knot in my stomach, pressing a light kiss to his lips. It feels so natural to do it, and I hope he’s feeling that too.
He kisses me back, just once, but it’s everything. His eyes bore into mine. “What are you doing to me, Nessa? Hmm.” With his free hand, he threads his fingers through my hair.
“I like when you call me that,” I admit. “The only other person who calls me Nessa is Kayleigh.” Jackson knows who my sister is although I doubt he’s ever spoken to Kayleigh or Hunter because they are so much younger than us.
“She’s going to be a stunner when she grows up,” he says. “Just like her big sister.” His fingers clasp the back of my head, sending a wave of heat rolling through me.
“Flattery will get you everywhere,” I tease, kissing the corner of his mouth.
He groans. “Never tell me that.”
He drops his forehead to mine, and I drink in the scent and feel of him. Jackson is all man, and I can’t believe he’s the same guy who used to avoid me, the same guy who used to irritate the fuck out of me with his stupid, immature behavior.
I’m seeing him in a whole new light, and I hope he’s seeing me in a new light too.
I ease back a little, smiling at him in what I hope is a flirtatious manner. “Come in.” We’ve been standing at my door like lovesick fools, and I’m sure the food is getting cold. I step aside and let him enter.
“It’s a lot nicer than I was expecting,” he admits, inspecting the space with surprise in his eyes.
While my apartment is only four hundred and fifty square feet, it is well proportioned and tastefully decorated.
“Paul, who owns the diner, only bought this place eighteen months ago. Initially, he gutted and refitted the space, intending on using it himself on occasion instead of traveling to and from New Jersey every day, but then, I came along, and he offered it to me,” I explain.
On the left is my bed with surrounding fitted wardrobes and matching bedside tables. Beside that, just inside the front door, is the small bathroom with shower. It is the only enclosed area in the room. On the right-hand side is the living area with two brown leather couches positioned around a small coffee table and wall-mounted TV. In the middle of the open-plan space is a square gray ash table with four matching chairs. Behind us is the kitchen, consisting of one row of cupboards, a stove, washer-slash-dryer, and refrigerator, and there’s even a slim dishwasher. The island unit facing the kitchen, and cutting off that space from the main living area, is where I prepare my meals and where Jackson drops the takeout bag.
“I’m glad I came here now,” he says. “I worried you were living in some grungy, neglected shithole. This puts my mind at ease.” My heart swells at his words, and it feels good to be cared about. “I didn’t bring beer or wine because you said you don’t drink, and I’ve been trying to abstain. Hope these are okay.” He hands me a large bottle of sparkling water and a large bottle of Coke.
“Great, thanks.” He’s observant and thoughtful, and I add it to the growing list of his attractive qualities.
He pulls out one of the stools, watching as I unpack the paper cartons, emptying mouthwatering food into bowls and plates. “I set the table outside,” I explain, urging him to grab what he wants and take it outside.
We carry our meal out and sit across from one another. “There isn’t much of a view, but at least, it’s private.”
“There is a lot to be said for privacy in a place like New York City,” he agrees, tucking into shrimp stir fry. “You must come over to our place next time. Hunt has the penthouse suite, and we have an awesome rooftop garden. We can grill steaks.”
“Sounds good, provided Sawyer won’t mind.”
“He won’t mind. Sawyer feels very … protective of you. It might be good for him to see I’m not eating you alive.” He chuckles as my mouth hangs open.
“What exactly have you been telling him?”
“Nothing.” He laughs again. “I swear. He just wants to know I’m treating you right.”
“Is he dating anyone?” I ask, taking a bite of spicy chicken.
Jackson shakes his head. “Not really.”
“I sense a story.” I urge him to continue with my eyes.
“He’s been hooking up with this guy we hung around with in Rydeville. I think there’s more to it than he’s saying, but I could be wrong.”
“I heard you moved. The gossip mill was in full swing at West Lorian when none of you showed up for senior year.”
“I’ll bet.” He grins.
“Did you really have an orgy
with Ms. Rowling?” She was one of the youngest teachers in our private school, and all the guys were in heat around her. When she didn’t return, and neither did the guys, all kinds of rumors were circulating.
“If you call me, Anderson, and Hunt taking turns with her and her friend an orgy, then yeah.”
“You’re all dogs,” I murmur, but there’s no malice in my tone.
“I seem to recall someone engaging in a few threesomes and foursomes during summer break unless those assholes were lying about fucking you.”
I know exactly which assholes he’s referring to even if half my summers in The Hamptons are a blur.
“They weren’t lying, and I wasn’t criticizing.” I hold up a hand. “No judgment in this corner.”
“Nor in this one.” He reaches across the small table, lacing his fingers in mine. “I’m glad we never hooked up back then.”
“Yeah. I think that much is obvious.” I force a laugh out, so it sounds lighthearted.
He squeezes my hand. “Not in the way you’re thinking.”
“What do you mean then?”
“It’s like I said last night. I want to do things right. If we’d screwed back then, it would’ve been meaningless like every other nameless, faceless encounter that I barely even remember. But this, now?” He peers deep into my eyes, and I lean forward, my heart beating ninety miles to the hour. “This means something, right?”
I nod, swallowing over the messy ball of emotion in my throat.
“When I make love to you, it will be for the right reasons, at the right time, in the right place, and it will mean everything, Nessa.” He brings my hand to his lips, kissing my knuckles. “Everything. You feel me?”
CHAPTER FIVE
Jackson
“YOU’RE MEETING VAN again?” Hunt asks the following morning as we’re eating breakfast in the kitchen.
“Yep.” I shovel the last spoonful of cereal in my mouth. “She can’t get enough of me.” I flash him one of my signature grins.
“I still don’t like this.”
“Bite me.”
“If she’s changed, like you’ve said, I don’t get why you can’t just ask her.” He scrubs a hand along his jaw.
“It’s too risky. She’s vulnerable, and if he’s reached out to her, she might already have loyalty to him. I want to catch him unawares, not tip him off.”
“Can’t you drop some hints?”
Dude is starting to get on my nerves again. “I don’t see what the big issue is. I’m treating her like a princess. She’ll get some great sex out of it and learn a valuable lesson about how to protect her heart in the future.” I walk to the sink and dump my bowl and spoon in. “She should probably be thanking me.”
“You really are an asshole.”
I shrug. “Think what you like, Hunt. This is about Dani. She is all that matters.”
“Dani wouldn’t want you trampling all over innocent girls in a quest for revenge. She’d hate that.”
I see red, yanking him up off his stool and shoving him back against the counter. “Don’t fucking tell me what my sister would or wouldn’t think. And Vanessa is far from innocent.”
He shoves me back, glaring at me. “I’m not talking about her virginity or lack thereof. I was there the night we gave it up to one another,” he says, smirking.
I don’t hide my scowl fast enough, and he scrutinizes my face like I’m a puzzle he desperately wants to figure out. I flip him off, annoyed at him for bringing that up. It’s never bothered me before that Hunt took Vanessa’s virginity. It never even factored on my radar, but I don’t like how it’s making me feel now. I rub at the tightness in my chest. Fuck this shit. I need to get with the program.
“I’m talking about how she’s innocent in all of this,” he adds in a less angry tone.
I fold my arms across my chest, drilling a hole in his forehead. “You can’t say that definitively. We don’t know what involvement she’s had with him.”
“If any,” he adds. “You’re making assumptions, and everyone knows what’s said about that.”
“Fuck you, Hunt. You want out, just say the word, and I’ll do this myself.”
He sighs. “I don’t want you handling this yourself. I’m as invested as you. I just don’t like that you’re duping Vanessa.”
“If you have other options, I’m all ears!” I shout, grabbing fistfuls of my hair. I’m sick of having the same conversation on repeat. “We’ve had guys searching the web for months. Paid a small fucking fortune to that PI, and we’ve still got zilch. Unless you want to defer freshman year at RU, and join me on a fruitless global search for the prick, I don’t see that I have any other choice. This is the only tangible lead we have.”
He sighs again, looking up at the ceiling. I wait him out, rubbing a sudden tense spot between my brows.
“Fine,” he admits. “You’re right, but just … try not to hurt her too bad. Something doesn’t feel right about the whole scenario with her parents, and I have a gut feeling there’s a lot we don’t know about Vanessa. She’s cleaning up her act, and I don’t want your actions to send her spiraling.”
“You know I can’t make any promises, but I hear ya. Okay?”
_______________
“I am so unfit,” Nessa admits, her voice all breathless as she flops down on the grass under the tree in Central Park. She looks utterly fuckable in her tight yoga pants and cropped sports top. Girl has legs for miles and perfect curves, and keeping my hands off her is becoming a real challenge.
“You should come running with me every day,” I suggest, handing the bellboy from our building a hundred-dollar bill. It’s his day off, but he agreed to take the picnic blanket and basket here and wait until we showed up. Dude nods, smiling and whistling under his breath as he saunters off.
“You’d be amazed how quickly you can improve your stamina and speed,” I add, laying the blanket down on the grass. “I used to run a fair bit, but my party lifestyle definitely impacted my fitness levels. Then, I cut back on booze, cut out weed, and started running consistently every day, and it really didn’t take long to improve.”
“I’d have to get up early to run because I’m usually too wrecked after work to do much of anything,” she admits.
I extend my arm to her, and she takes my hand. I pull her up and into my arms, uncaring we’re both a little sweaty. “I can force my lazy ass out of bed early to go with you.” I rub my nose against hers.
“You don’t have to do that. I can run by myself.”
I swat her ass. “No fucking way, babe. Jogging around CP by yourself is not happening. I know there are lots of people around, even early, but it’s still not safe.” I kiss her cheek. “I’d only worry.”
She practically swoons in my arms, and my stomach churns unsteadily. “You say all the right things,” she murmurs, zeroing in on my lips.
She wouldn’t say that if she knew the truth.
Even if my words just now were sincere.
I kiss her, because I don’t want to be thinking the things I’m thinking right now. “Hungry?” I ask when we break for air, nuzzling into her neck.
“Yeah. But not just for food.” She clutches my shoulders, staring at me, making her intent clear. I think my shy Nessa is getting a little braver.
“Food first, and then, we’ll see,” I tease, pulling her down onto the blanket. We unpack all the food my favorite deli prepared, and then, we lean back against the trunk of the tree, eating and drinking as we people watch.
“Leave some room for dessert,” I say when we make fast work on the gorgeous salads and wraps. “We have chocolate strawberries.”
“You trying to fatten me up?” she asks, nudging my shoulder.
“Hey, I could’ve brought brownies. And we burned some calories from our run.” I lift a strawberry from the container, deliberately licking my lips as I home in on her beautiful face. “We can always burn more off later if we need to.” I waggle my brows suggestively. When I bring the strawberry t
o her mouth, her lips part, and her warm breath trickles over my fingers.
“I like the sound of that.” She opens her mouth wider, biting down on the strawberry as her eyes lock on mine. Fuck, that shouldn’t be so hot.
“Me too.” I grab another strawberry, ready to pop it in my mouth but she takes it from me.
Her smile is wide as she brings it to my lips, urging me to open for her. I dart my tongue out, licking along the side of her finger, and she sucks in a gasp. Her eyes darken with molten heat, and my cock wakes up. I open my mouth, biting into the strawberry, without breaking eye contact.
We silently feed one another, and the air crackles with sexual tension. Our faces are close, our bodies side by side, and I’d challenge anyone to pry me away from her in this moment. I let her have the last strawberry, but she bites it in half, offering the last bit to me. Little bits of fleshy strawberry sit on her bottom lip, and I can’t ignore the temptation any longer. I lap at the strawberry remnants with my tongue as I pull her into my arms. She repositions herself on my lap so she’s straddling me, leaning down, and kissing me. Her tongue swirls into my mouth, and the kiss quickly grows heated.
My cock is like a block of wood behind my flimsy jogging shorts as she grinds against me in a way that should be outlawed in public. The tiny moans she emits are like a shot of liquid lust straight to my dick, and I’m seconds away from pulling her behind the tree and burying myself deep inside her.
She pulls back first. “Damn. You make me so horny I forgot we were in broad daylight.” She laughs, and it does weird things to me. “The fact I haven’t had sex in a year might have something to do with it too.”
“Seriously?” I ask, not masking my surprise. I readjust myself in my shorts when she climbs off me.
“Told you I’ve turned over a new leaf.” Pride glimmers in her tone. She sits beside me, resting her head on my shoulder, and I press a kiss to the top of her hair. “I worked my butt off this year. My grades have always been a bit up and down, but I was determined to graduate on a high, so I really knuckled down. Between school, work, and study, I had no downtime, which suited me. I don’t miss much about my old life,” she adds in a lower tone. “Except my sister and brother. And sex.” She laughs again, and the tinkling sound sends a rake of shivers coasting over my body.
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