Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? On the Side: Sword Oratoria, Vol. 4

by Fujino Omori, Kiyotaka Haimura

“And here I’ve been trying to mellow out,” Finn responded with his shoulders slouched.

  “You, Finn? Don’t make me laugh!” Gareth’s lips turned upward together with his beard.

  As Riveria gazed down at the two of them, a nostalgic look came over her. “…To think that the three of us who used to do nothing but quarrel among ourselves would spearhead a Dungeon crawl together. A funny world it is sometimes.”

  The proud, versatile high elf; the crude, disparaging dwarf who hated her; and the prum stuck between them, a never-ending stream of sighs passing his lips.

  As the three of them thought back to the days that led them to this moment, they shared a sudden smile.

  “Let’s do this, yeah? It’ll be a breath of fresh air,” Gareth said, extending an arm.

  Finn and Riveria, despite their wry smiles, imitated the dwarf and dropped their hands atop his in the center of their circle as though they had planned to.

  The same ritual they’d performed so many moons ago on the day of their oath.

  It was Loki who’d forcibly encouraged the three of them to put their bickering on hold long enough to join hands like this and share their aspirations.

  “To heated battles.”

  “To an unknown world.”

  “To the revival of my race.”

  The dwarf, elf, and prum spoke in turn before bumping their fists together.

  Their intentions spoken, it was time to end their walk down memory lane and become the familia leaders they were.

  “Aiz and the others will be waiting. Shall we go?” said Finn.

  Riveria and Gareth nodded, and the three left the room.

  “Speakin’ of…Finn, how goes, uh, that other objective of yours?”

  “Yes, your successor…A bride who can produce an heir.”

  “Unfortunately, I’m not exactly blessed when it comes to romance. If you two happen to find anyone nice, do introduce me?”

  “Tione would murder me. I must politely decline,” replied Riveria.

  “Same here, friend,” added Gareth.

  The three demi-humans chatted idly with spear, ax, and staff in hand as they made their way over to their waiting comrades.

  Sunlight poured down on Central Park from the clear blue sky above.

  It was the intersection of Orario’s eight main streets, making it a hub for adventurers even in the early morning hours.

  Armored boys, girls, and heroes alike passed through the square on their way to the Dungeon, their supporters trailing behind them. In the midst of the swarm of races on their way to the great white tower, Aiz, too, found herself heading toward that great skyscraper.

  After gathering everything in front of the manor, Finn led the Loki Familia troupe to Central Park via North Main Street. Accompanied by load after giant load of equipment and materials, they stopped a short distance from Babel’s northern entrance and awaited further orders.

  Even crying children were silenced by the sight of their flag, emblazoned with the emblem of the Trickster. As the largest familia in the city, they drew attention and buzz from all sides as they stood there waiting for the command to depart.

  “Oh-ho-ho! If it isn’t the Sword Princess! Been a while since we crossed paths. How ya been?”

  “Miss Tsubaki…”

  Aiz was staring up at Babel and its backdrop of blue sky when Tsubaki’s voice sounded out next to her.

  She glanced over to find Tsubaki Collbrande, ever-present eye patch over her left eye, closing in on her with an amiable smile on her face.

  Just as Aiz was wearing armor and bearing her sword, Tsubaki was bedecked in her own Dungeon gear. Her armor was a mix of island and continent styles—bright-red pleated trousers from the East called hakama concealed her legs from the shins up, while battle clothes covered her upper torso and ample chest. On top of that, she wore gauntlets and shoulder protectors.

  Her upper and lower halves were every bit a fusion of East and West.

  At her side in its obsidian scabbard was her long tachi. Accompanying her were the many High Smiths who would be joining the expedition.

  The confederation of Hephaistos Familia and Loki Familia was complete.

  “It will be a pleasure working with you,” Aiz began, having been told by Riveria some time ago that the smiths would be joining them.

  “You bet! Just leave things to me! No need for the fancy words, though! We’re itchin’ to get down there, too, so we’re scratching each other’s backs for sure,” Tsubaki responded good-naturedly, not even trying to hide her own familia’s intentions.

  Aiz could only smile wryly at the other woman’s boisterous laughter.

  All of a sudden, Tsubaki looked away with an “Oh!” of surprise.

  “There you are, Bete Loga! You break that Frosvirt of yers again, and I’ll never forgive you, ya hear? I had a hell of a time fixin’ it!”

  “Whoa, whoa, whooooa there! I hear ya loud and clear, okay? I won’t break it! Damn! Get away from me!”

  Eyes locked on Bete, Tsubaki made a beeline toward him. He cried out, beads of sweat dotting his temples as the smirking woman closed the gap between them far too much for his comfort.

  Aiz looked on curiously as the fearless spectacle drew the awed gazes of everyone around them, only to be approached by a new shadow.

  “How fares the Sword Princess, hmm?”

  “…Miss Lulune?” Aiz turned around to find herself face-to-face with the young chienthrope girl. She stared at her in puzzlement, with no clue as to what a member of Hermes Familia would be doing there. “Why are you here…?”

  “Thought I’d wish you well and all on your expedition, I guess. You have saved me more than a couple of times in the past.” Apparently she’d determined just when the two familias would have some free time before departing for the Dungeon and timed her entrance accordingly. Though she quickly added that she had no intention of overstaying her visit lest she trouble the actual expedition participants.

  “Take these. A little something to eat I like to bring with me when I’m exploring ruins. One of these’ll keep you full for a whole day. And, uh, don’t worry—there’s nothing weird in ’em or anything.”

  “…Thank you.” Aiz smiled softly at the offered pouch of block-shaped rations.

  While members of both familias were currently absorbed in the exchange happening between Bete and Tsubaki, Lulune plopped the bag into Aiz’s hand—with an unexpected clink.

  Concealed beneath the bag was a single crystal.

  “From our friend in the black robes,” she whispered so softly only Aiz could hear.

  “!” Aiz’s eyes widened with a start.

  “Black robes” could mean only one person—the hooded character Aiz and Lulune had both been seeing more and more of recently.

  Aiz had trouble containing her surprise as she looked down at the blue crystal—a request from the mysterious shaman.

  “I checked it out already with Asfi, and it seems pretty normal…Seems our friend just wants you to have it on the fifty-ninth floor, is all,” the thief explained, recounting what she’d been told as she discreetly handed Aiz the crystal. “Toss it if you want. Your call.” After she finished speaking, Lulune took a step back.

  Aiz found herself at a loss, which only made Lulune laugh, her brow wrinkling.

  “I really did just wanna come see you off, though, you know…even if it may not seem like it with the request and all. Once you come back, we’ll go for that drink, got it?” Her tanned skin flushing slightly, she brought a finger up to sheepishly scratch at her cheek. “Catch ya later!” she finished before turning around and walking off with a swish of her tail.

  Aiz watched her disappear into the crowd, then she returned her gaze to the pouch—and crystal.

  The orb itself was tiny and blue, connected to a chain. After a moment’s glance, Aiz fastened it to the loin guard of her armor.

  Did she completely trust that hooded figure? No. But this was a good-luck charm given to her by a fri
end who came all the way down here to see her off.

  The little blue crystal glittered atop the silver gleam of her loin guard.

  “Was that Miss Lulune just now? What could she have wanted with Miss Aiz?”

  Lefiya ruminated on this as she caught a glimpse of the exchange between Lulune and Aiz.

  Surrounded by Tiona and Tione—who were endlessly chattering—and the other familia members, Lefiya cocked her head to the side in curiosity.

  “Miss Lefiya!”

  “Hmm? Miss Amid?” She turned around to find a beautiful silver-haired human with features so delicate they resembled a doll’s.

  The Dian Cecht Familia healer bowed her head, having joined the group via Northwest Main Street.

  “I couldn’t be here waiting for you on account of Miach—I mean, a certain familia taking up my time with their new merchandise contract, but it seems I’ve still made it on time. This is for you.”

  “Are these…potions?”

  “They are, indeed. Our very own high-magic potions.”

  Amid handed her a small pouch filled with a variety of test tubes.

  At the surprised expression on Lefiya’s face, she continued. “A farewell gift for your expedition, yes?”

  “Amid! You came to see us off! But what gives? How come only Lefiya gets a gift?” Tiona butted in, overhearing Lefiya and Amid’s conversation.

  “Surely someone like you doesn’t need potions, Miss Tiona,” Amid responded with a little snicker.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?!”

  “I was merely joking,” the healer replied before she pulled out an even larger pouch than the one she’d given Lefiya. “You’ll find a few high potions and elixirs inside. Share them with everyone, would you?”

  “Thank you, Amid. This is wonderful. And so many, too,” Tione replied appreciatively, to which Amid only shook her head.

  The kindhearted healer looked at each of them in turn before offering them a deep bow.

  “May the fortunes of war shine upon you,” she said before taking her leave.

  Lefiya, Tiona, and Tione glanced down at the healing items they’d received before raising their voices in thanks.

  All around them, too, similar exchanges were taking place.

  Personal acquaintances and friends alike showed up to send off their Loki Familia comrades with a smile and a few words of encouragement.

  Humans and demi-humans from all around were there to support and salute the adventurers on their journey to the unknown.

  “Brothers! Sisters! The expedition begins now!” Finn called out from in front of the assemblage.

  Everyone turned to face the familia leader, Babel to his back and Gareth and Riveria to either side.

  “We’ll be splitting into two parties as we enter the Dungeon! Riveria and I will lead the first, and Gareth will be leading the second! We’ll rendezvous on the eighteenth floor and continue together to the fiftieth floor! Our goal? To venture into the unexplored depths—the fifty-ninth floor!”

  Everyone’s ears—Bete’s, Tiona’s, Tione’s, Lefiya’s, Tsubaki’s—buzzed with Finn’s proclamation.

  As Aiz joined the others watching the three familia leaders, her mind was already racing at the thought of what awaited them in the den of monsters beneath that great white tower.

  Within the Dungeon’s dark depths below the earth.

  “You are adventurers! Warriors no less brave than the heroes of old! Conquer the vast unknown and return with fame and fortune!”

  From the main streets, the square, in every corner and window, citizens, adventurers, and everyone else in Orario watched over them, eager to see Loki Familia’s departure.

  “Sacrifices will lead to nothing but false honor! Everyone, pray with me now! Make an oath to the light of the surface—you will come back alive!”

  As the members of both familias raised their fists, Finn sucked in his breath. Then, as though communing their short departure with the blue sky stretched out above their heads, he gave the order.

  “Expedition team—move out!”

  Their battle cry shook the very heavens.

  Aiz stared at the sky overhead, surrounded by the shouting cries of her peers.

  Loki Familia’s expedition had begun.

  “This is gonna be interestin’!”

  The manor’s central tower…

  Having sent Finn and the others off from their home earlier, Loki now stood on the roof, looking toward the city’s center as the cries of war echoed around her.

  “Could it be calamity that awaits them? Or perhaps…”

  The underground shrine beneath Guild Headquarters…

  Ouranos turned his brine-colored eyes skyward as the torchlights flickered around him.

  “Yes…Show me.”

  And atop the highest floor of the great white tower.

  Unbeknownst to all, the beautiful goddess smiled down on them.

  Thus, the threads of a new Dungeon epic were spun beneath the gaze of the gods.

  The majority of the two factions’ heavy hitters were in the vanguard party—the first team to dive into the Dungeon.

  Given how unpredictable the Dungeon was, it would be their job to take care of any Irregulars that popped up along their route. They would act as advance troops, ensuring the safety of the heart of the expedition by clearing the way for the party following them with the materials and spare equipment.

  Those on the vanguard team led by Finn and Riveria included Aiz, Bete, Tiona, Tione, and seven more of the familia’s most distinguished first-tier adventurers. They were joined by a slew of second-tier adventurers, such as Raul, who’d be acting as supporters.

  Gareth, the remaining first-tier adventurer, as well as Lefiya and the other magic users, would follow behind in the second larger party.

  “Hey, hey, Tione! What are all those people from other familias doin’ here? They’re not, like, supporters we’ve hired or something, are they?” Tiona asked, glancing behind her. The two parties had split to avoid the chaos of the narrow upper-floor passageways as they made their way into the Dungeon. She’d only just now noticed Hephaistos Familia smiths traveling along behind them.

  “Don’t be an idiot, Tiona. Have you already forgotten what happened during our last expedition?” her sister replied in exasperation.

  “?”

  “They’re smiths, Tiona,” Riveria explained with a great deal more politeness.

  “Ah!” Tiona burst out, suddenly understanding. Considering she’d played no part in the expedition preparations—and consequently knew nothing of the trouble that had gone into them—she’d had no idea members of Hephaistos Familia would be joining them.

  Ten Hephaistos Familia smiths had joined the fifteen Loki Familia adventurers. The smiths had been split up between the two parties with their captain, Tsubaki, accompanying their current group as a member of the vanguard.

  “That’s pretty crazy, though, you know? Hephaistos Familia High Smiths? Together with us?”

  “Yes, and Lady Hephaistos is doing us a big favor, so let’s try and avoid any blunders, hmm, Tiona?” Finn responded with an amused laugh, watching the girl spin about excitedly at the news of their new companions. He’d been the one who’d gone to Hephaistos directly, after all.

  “I know, I know!” Tiona replied with a laugh of her own as she sprinted ahead to wrap her arms around Aiz’s shoulders from behind. “Did you hear that, Aiz? Huh? Huh? High Smiths from Hephaistos Familia are joining us!”

  “Yes, I heard…Pretty neat,” she responded playfully to the naive Amazon hanging off her back. Like the others, Aiz already knew that the smiths would be joining them, but she couldn’t keep a smile from gracing her lips at Tiona’s enthusiasm.

  They soon arrived at the Dungeon’s seventh floor.

  Surrounded by the greenish walls and ceilings of the Dungeon’s passageways, they continued along unhindered, their cheer almost strange considering the fact they were on an expedition.

  �
��Hell yeah! If they’re from Hephaistos Familia, we at least don’t hafta worry about them slowin’ us down! What a relief!” Bete bellowed next to them, his ears twitching, which garnered a laugh from the High Smiths behind them.

  “There it is! Bete’s famous ego!”

  Tiona narrowed her eyes at the werewolf’s pompous grin.

  “Is it even possible for you to be nice, Bete? Do you get some kinda thrill looking down on everyone else? I hate people like that!”

  “You got it all wrong! You actually think I like looking down on bottom-feeders? Don’t make me laugh! All I do is call it like I see it,” Bete responded with a snort, explaining himself the same way he’d done for Loki only the night before.

  Still attached to Aiz’s back, Tiona let out a squawk of anger that sounded very much like a monkey.

  The werewolf’s goading only elicited angered grumbles from those around them.

  This was a sight they were more than used to.

  “What can I say? I can’t stand weaklings! Lookin’ at ’em floundering away makes me laugh so hard I can’t stop!”

  “That sounds like nothing but the arrogance of a strong man looking down his nose at others,” Riveria responded.

  Tiona added, “True! You were one of those ‘weaklings’ once, too, you know!”

  “I’m just sayin’ they need to know their place, is all!”

  As Aiz listened to the three of them squabble, a thought came to her mind.

  Know your place—the thought morphed into words that she muttered beneath her breath.

  One’s place. It was neither pitying, nor insulting, nor shocking. It was simply something you knew.

  It was the same thing that had been hammered into that boy so many times he’d verbally renounced his place. What had been running through his head? How had he felt? What was it that had pushed him to that point?

  She thought of those rubellite eyes she’d seen back at the bar, liable to burst into tears at a moment’s notice.

  How had he overcome things after being looked down on, scorned, spit on by Bete? Or perhaps it was that very contempt that spurred him forward?

  Had he hated himself so much that his anger became a spring, propelling him steadfastly, obstinately higher and higher?