by Annie Boone
“I don’t know.” He looked off out the window for a moment as he gathered his thoughts. “She didn’t talk to me for the whole ride back to her house.”
Slipping away, Lillian left his side. He listened to her knocking around dishes until she brought him over a plate filled with two biscuits covered in gravy and a mug of coffee. She put a fork in his hand that rested on the table. “You’re not thinking straight,” she instructed in a firm tone, one that she usually only reserved for her children. “Now eat.”
A flicker of a smile graced his lips before he nodded obediently and cut a bite and put it into his mouth. It melted in his mouth and he felt like he was able to breathe again. He hadn’t realized how hungry he was and it helped him gain focus, putting food in his stomach. “These are mighty good,” he murmured between another bite as he pulled the plate closer.
She chuckled. “Good. And perhaps while you eat, you’ll listen to me?” He shrugged and she poked his shoulder. “I mean it. Simon, your time with Olivia has made you happy. I haven’t seen you this way in a long time, not since Jane. I even heard you whistling the other day. Just because she seemed uncertain certain about the kiss, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t like you.”
He looked up at her, shook his head, and looked down at his plate.
“After all, it doesn’t sound like you’re reacting quite well to the kiss either. Perhaps she had similar concerns? You said she told you about several tragedies in her past, and maybe she’s worried about what will happen. She came here so recently, and everything’s new to her. She’s probably in the same boat you are, Simon.”
He paused. “She mentioned there had been someone else.” His brow furrowed as he tried to remember. What had Olivia said? It was someone she was courting, or a fiancé in Vermont, but something had happened so she had needed to leave. Twiddling his fork, he tried to think this through. “But what about Jane?”
Lillian gave him a pointed look. “Jane will always be a part of you, but she’s gone. You know she’ll always be in your heart. And Olivia would understand that. She will be a part of you in the best way. And it’s okay to have a new start with someone new. Jane would want you to be happy. ”
He let silence settle in. Listening to the thudding of his heart, Simon tried to think about this. After a minute, Lillian must have decided she’d said enough and stood up, moving around the kitchen. She set the table, and went to check on the children.
Once the kitchen was cleaned and bread was rising for the supper meal, Lillian touched her brother’s shoulder. “You need to get up and get moving,” she instructed him. “Go work in the fields and think about what I said, all right?”
“All right,” he said vaguely, nodding absently as he clambered up to his feet. “All right.” Pulling his boots on, Simon put his hat on and made his way into the sunshine. Like that first bite that morning, the light brought him clarity and he started working through his troubled thoughts out in the fields.
Frank was a quiet man, a hard worker focused on his efforts. Though the two of them worked closely to one another, neither of them said a single word. But it was good, Simon knew, and his sister was right. That little girl he used to watch over had definitely grown up into a wise woman.
By midafternoon, he realized he was being a fool. Lillian was right. He could be happy again, and he had learned lately that this was possible. Jane was out of reach now, but it didn’t mean that she had to disappear. And it meant that he could be happy again, with Olivia.
It put a new outlook on life for him, the moment that Simon realized what a fool he had been. Scaring himself out of this opportunity, scaring himself away from love. And he was certain that Olivia Foster felt the same, that she was hesitant to begin again as he was. Just like that, he felt new life breathed into him and he could hardly focus on his task anymore. With a new drive, he couldn’t just stand there feeding the goats now. No, he had to do something about it.
Simon dropped everything and headed towards the barn. He waved to Lillian as he passed, and then continued down the road. The wind took his hat, but it didn’t matter anymore. Nothing mattered, except for seeing Olivia. He headed towards the Jessup home, his heart thudding more loudly than he could ever remember.
Chapter Twelve
“I’m perfectly fine,” Susannah muttered to herself, glancing in her reflection again. She wrinkled her red nose, and that only made it hurt worse. Staggering a breath through her mouth, she pouted. After wrapping a blanket around her on top of the shawl, she turned away from the window and carefully made her way down to the kitchen to find something to do.
She had woken up with the foggiest head and worst stuffy nose of her life. Lucas and Olivia had convinced her to return to bed after breakfast, then the two of them headed off to town without her. She admitted to herself she didn’t feel like leaving the house and was grateful for Olivia who by now knew exactly what they needed to stock the shelves.
It had only been an hour or so since they’d left, but Susannah was bored. Exhausted, aching, and bored. Shuffling to the table, she took a seat and looked around. After blowing her nose in an extra handkerchief, Susannah considered her options. She could make that loaf of bread they needed, sweep, or return to her bed. It was a hard decision, so she figured resting for another minute wouldn’t matter.
There was a knock at the door that startled her. Susannah inhaled sharply, not realizing her eyes had been closed. Clumsily she pulled herself together and staggered towards the front door, leaning against the wall when she got there. There was a fresh breeze that only tickled her already swollen nose as she opened the door, and squinted into the light to find Simon standing there.
“Oh,” her eyes widened. “Good day, Simon. We weren’t expecting you today, were we?” Furrowing her brow, she tried to think.
He nodded with a nervous smile before shaking his head, realizing it had been a question. “No, I’m afraid I came unexpectedly. I was hoping to speak with Olivia. I’m real sorry to barge in, Mrs. Jessup. I shouldn’t be bothering you. Are you all right?”
He was polite, that’s for certain. She knew she looked terrible, with her hair unkempt and shivering beneath her layers. Sighing, Susannah rubbed her head. “I’ve been better, that’s for certain. Let’s talk in the warmth of the sun, shall we?” She stepped out to the porch and into the sunlight.
It was much too bright, and for a moment she was blinded. Only with Simon’s hand did she make it to the bench without falling over. “You look unwell.” He frowned deeply. “Perhaps you should return to the house. I’ll go get Mr. Jessup and maybe we can get you to the doc—”
She waved a hand in the air. “Honestly, I’m fine. There’s nothing to fuss about. I’m under the weather, that’s all. But let’s talk. Right now, my husband and Olivia are taking care of some errands in town. It’s about time you and I catch up with what’s been happening.”
The stiffness slipped from his shoulders, and only then did Susannah notice there was something different about him. There had been something on his mind, and she had thrown him off. Simon was trying to reorient himself, fiddling with his clothes as his eyes darted from her to the house to the road and back.
“Then, I can… I mean…” He looked away towards the barn clearly trying to put his words together.
“If you don’t mind my asking, how did the picnic go? From your point of view?” Susannah decided to redirect the conversation since it didn’t appear he knew where to take it. Sometimes men just needed guidance on where to start moving. “Olivia returned rather quiet, I thought.”
Simon paused, and his eyes turned downward. “Yes. At first, it went well. We enjoyed each other’s company and talked. But we got off track, I guess. You might recall that I was married before.” He cut his eyes to her suddenly, his gaze intense on hers. “And I don’t think I was really prepared for something new. Someone new.”
Through the fog, Susannah began to see the intersecting pieces and the connections between everything. Ol
ivia’s fear and uncertainty, the doubt that lingered definitely matched the expression on Simon’s face now. What she thought would bring them together wasn’t working as she had hoped. Trying to get comfortable, she leaned back and sighed. “So the two of you respect one another, but are afraid to move on from those you loved before.”
Grudgingly he nodded, and then turned to her. “Who was he? She was betrothed, right?”
“She didn’t tell you the details?” Susannah hesitated, then went on when Simon gave a slight shake of his head. “Well, yes, she did lose the man she planned to marry. But if she didn’t say more about it, I don’t think it’s my place to tell the story for her. But I can assure you, it is very similar to yours. Olivia Foster has faced a lifetime of loss. She has been left alone much too often and is worried she’ll lose the next person she cares for. It makes sense that she’d believe that because of her past.” With her hand wrapped up in the shawl, she patted the man’s knee comfortingly. “She’ll come around, though. I’m sure of it.”
Simon took a deep breath and set his shoulders back. “Good. Because I want to marry her. It’s why I came over.”
For a moment, she didn’t think she’d heard right. But the firmly set jaw and confidence in his gaze told Susannah that she had heard exactly what she thought she had. Heart beating, she sniffled and looked at him thoughtfully. “You mean it,” she whispered. “You really mean it. You love her.”
Laughing, Simon nodded and clambered up to his feet. Suddenly energized by this confession, the man started to pace on the porch and Susannah beamed. It was a precious moment, and she was so glad she wasn’t missing this. The only thing missing was Olivia.
“I do,” he said finally. “Yes, I mean it. I do love her. I love Olivia very much. This morning, I spoke with Lillian and she helped me see reason. We only have one life, and we need all the love we can find. Don’t you think? And I know it’s still soon, and we can wait if she wants, but if she’ll have me, I want to marry that woman.”
He stood tall and proud, and Susannah clapped from her seat. “I think—” but a coughing fit stopped her from finishing her thought. Clutching her chest, she fought for breath. Simon hurried to her side, patting her back as she gasped, finally drawing in fresh air.
“We should get you inside. Perhaps next week would be better for me to see Olivia.”
She shook her head. “No, I don’t want to be what keeps your relationship from progressing forward. Now, I’m sure I have some cider we can put over the fire. Let’s get a few cups, and then we can start planning your proposal.” She put out a hand and he carefully pulled her to her feet. “Surely you weren’t just going to come out and say it, were you? Did you have anything more planned?”
“What else is there to say?” He frowned.
Susannah laughed as they headed inside. This new challenge gave her the energy she needed to pull together the nice hot cider for them. Holding a mug of the steaming drink spread warmth through her insides as she sat across from Simon who was trying to figure out how best to propose.
Sighing, Simon started at his cup. “When I married Jane, she, well, we just knew it would happen. I don’t think I ever actually asked her the question, we just decided that it was time. I actually think she just told me it was time. She was my closest friend, all through my childhood and all through the hardships and the joy. One day we were friends, one day we were closer, and the next we were married. Since our relationship was so easy. And different, I suppose… well, I never thought I would need to consider another.” For a moment his expression went dark, and then he shook his head and offered Susannah a sheepish grin. “Do women really take the proposal seriously? How it’s done, I mean?”
Chuckling, she shrugged. “Some take it seriously, and some don’t. But it’s an important thing to plan to be on the safe side. Now, let’s see what we can come up with, shall we? Why, you could even stop back into town and go ask Olivia before the day is through!”
Now that was a thought. Susannah peered towards the windows. The weather was good and the sun was shining bright. Perhaps they would need to make their own trip to town.
Chapter Thirteen
“Flour, sugar. What else?” Olivia was nearly finished in the mercantile after stopping in the haberdashery and delivering some vegetables to the church. Pulling the scrap of paper from her pocket, she glanced over the errand list one more time. “Church and vegetables, haberdashery for buttons, then flour, sugar, and salt. That’s what it was.”
In a rather good mood, she started to hum as she waited for the supplies she needed. “Here we are,” she beamed. “That should be everything.”
The clerk took care of her list and found one of his errand boys to carry everything out to the wagon for her. Wrapping her coat around her, she followed the young man out, offering advice on the best way to put everything in place. “Perfect,” she nodded when he was finished. “Thank you so much.”
She watched the young boy, blushing and awkward, hurry back inside. Reaching for her bonnet, she started to put it back on. Today was a good day, and Susannah had been right about her needing to get out of the house. As Olivia turned to the front of the cart, she found Lucas headed in her direction. “There you are! I’m nearly finished. Oh, my.” She was immediately concerned when she saw his troubled expression.
Dropping her hands to her side, she squinted at the man who came closer her. Trouble, and guilt, and uncertainty. All of these emotions were ones Olivia had never seen in Lucas Jessup before, not in the few months that she had known him and his wife. If anything, he was much too calm and too confident most of the time.
“What is it?” She swallowed hard, not sure she wanted to hear what he would say.
“Let’s go to my office.” He took a deep breath, rubbing his forehead as he glanced around the street. He grabbed her arm when she didn’t budge, but did so lightly, inviting her to join him down the block towards his sheriff’s office. She hurried to keep up with him, wrapping her fingers around his arm in order to stay upright. Olivia noticed his eyes skirting the streets carefully, as though he were looking for something, or someone.
“But the wagon. We can’t leave it.” She was looking for any excuse she could think of to stall.
He shook his head. “It’ll be fine. It all can wait.” Normally Lucas wouldn’t do such a thing. He never left anything unfinished. Swallowing, she found herself looking around the town carefully, wondering what was out there causing him to be so watchful. Dread filled her stomach and her mouth turned dry as the fear returned to her stomach. Just when she had thought it was finally fading, it came back like a tidal wave.
They reached his office, a small room with a desk. It led off to one other room with a desk for Jeb Harbin, and then a back room with three cells. Lucas sat her down in his chair, and he started to pace the room. Olivia watched, twisting her hands in her lap, listening and waiting. Finally, she could bear the tension no longer.
“What’s going on?” She asked finally, her voice just above a whisper. “Please, you’re frightening me, Mr. Jessup.”
At the sound of his name, he stopped. He hung his hat on the wall peg and finally brought out a folded piece of paper from his pocket. “We just received this in the mail. There were a few additional copies, but I’ve destroyed them.”
“What are you talking about?” She frowned, confused as he handed her the crumpled paper. Carefully she unfolded it, only to have her heart bottom out at the sight of the document. It had a rough sketch of her and said Wanted in large red letters at the bottom. “What in the world?” Her jaw dropped in disbelief.
“You have a warrant out for your arrest,” Lucas told her plainly. He leaned over on the desk, laying it out for her. “You’re wanted across the States for the murder of a Jack Henderson.” Her heart stopped. “And if you are found, you are to be apprehended and accompanied back to Vermont for trial.”
She could feel the blood draining from her face, and the urge to faint was strong. Gas
ping for breath, Olivia tossed the paper back on the table and covered her mouth in horror. “No. No, please…”
Why would this be happening to her? She felt sick to her stomach, and though she wanted to run with every fiber of her being, she couldn’t make her legs move. Unable to stand on her own two feet, Olivia fell back into her chair.
Lucas looked at her with narrowed eyes and didn’t say anything.
“Mr. Jessup, I swear, you have to believe me. I’m innocent, this is wrong!”
Her desperate plea caught his attention and he nodded, staring at the paper. For a minute she couldn’t tell what he was thinking. She had no idea what he would do about this.
“That’s what I thought. But Miss Foster, I need to know why this would be happening. I don’t believe you could have hurt anyone, but you will need to tell me what happened in Vermont.”
Tears were already trickling down her face. Sniffling, she tried to rub them away. But there were too many, just at the thought of her home. All the pain, all the hardships, what had it all been for?
“Jack Henderson was my betrothed.” she sniffled loudly and fished in her reticule for a handkerchief. “When my grandmother died, his family took me in until we were married and could afford our own place. I had no place else to go. We were just saving as much money as we could. But there was an accident. It was a hunting accident. It had nothing to do with me, I swear it.”
“Could anyone else have caused it?” He interrupted with a frown, thinking this through.
Her heart skipped a beat, trying to imagine that. “No,” she shook her head at last. “No, it was an accident. He was separated from the group, you see, and there was nothing suspicious about it.” She sniffled, shaking her head and trying to clear her thoughts.
“But they couldn’t just turn me out to the streets, and I had nowhere else to go. Jack’s uncle, Theodore, started plotting with Jack’s mother about getting rid of me by marrying me off to someone else. Adam Parker, he was an untrustworthy businessman. Apparently the Henderson family would get paid if I married him. So I left. I left the moment I found out. But I swear, I haven’t hurt anyone.”
