Hold on Tight

by Shelley Shepard Gray

  “Probably not.” He smiled slightly. “I’ve got a good excuse, though. I’ve known pretty much everybody in Lubbock my whole life. I haven’t had much of the occasion to meet new people.” Realizing how much he’d talked to Jackson and the customers when he’d bartended, he shrugged. “I’ve been doing all right here, though. So there is that.”

  She folded her arms over her chest. “I can’t believe you’re still here.”

  “I’m not going to leave until we get things settled between us.”

  “Seth, that isn’t necessary.”

  “It is.” He shrugged. “And since I aim to be here a little longer, I might end up meeting all kinds of people. It will be good for me.”

  Though she wasn’t smiling, her eyes had lit up. “Maybe. Maybe not.” Just as he thought she was going to turn silent again, she continued. “Jackson has a group of buddies from home. Believe it or not, they all moved here from a little town in West Virginia.”

  “Why did they do that?”

  “At first, I thought they just kind of followed each other here, but now that I’ve gotten to know Jackson better, he told me that a lot of people they knew were affected by the mine closures.”

  “He used to mine, right?”

  She nodded. “He was a crew supervisor. I don’t think the others worked the mines, but their fathers did.”

  “Working in a mine has got to be difficult. Bet they’re glad to be out of there.”

  “I thought that would be the case, but I think Jackson would return to that life in a heartbeat. I know he misses it.”

  “That’s too bad for you, right?”

  “Why would you say that?”

  “You really like him. If he misses mining, he might go back to it.”

  She seemed to give that some thought. “No, I don’t think he will. I’m under the impression that he’s staying put.”

  “That’s good. He’s a good employee, right?”

  “He’s a good man but only an okay bartender.” She smiled. “He’s getting better, though. And, I guess he can manage all sorts of people. I keep giving him more and more responsibility, and he takes it all in stride. He’s a great manager.”

  Bree’s arrival with their sandwiches prevented him from replying.

  “Here you go. One turkey for you, Gen, and the French dip for you, Seth.”

  The sandwiches looked amazing. “Thanks.”

  “You need anything else?” Bree looked from one to the other of them.

  “I’m fine,” Gen said.

  “I’m good, too.”

  After Bree turned back around, Seth watched her take a bite of her sandwich then did the same with his own. Just as he was swallowing, she murmured, “I keep thinking about Jackson. Do … do you think it’s easy to go back to being the person you used to be?”

  Seth didn’t even have to think about that. “No.”

  She raised her eyebrows. “Wow. You’re certain.”

  “We all grow up. Grow old, too, I guess. Things change. Life happens. All of that influences a person’s perspective, I think.”

  She nodded slowly as she chewed another bite. “I bet you’re right. I’ve been here almost two years now. It’s not that long but I’ve changed a ton.”

  “I know.”

  “I don’t know if I ever could go back to being the girl I once was.”

  “Do you think you would want to be her?”

  “Maybe.” She brushed a lock of hair back behind her shoulder. “That girl was a little more optimistic about life. Maybe a little prettier.”

  She surely had been pretty two years ago. There had been a look of contentment in her eyes that he hadn’t spied since he’d come to visit. But he couldn’t say that the more guarded look was a bad thing. “You’re still pretty. Still real pretty.”

  She rolled her eyes. “I don’t know about that. All these late nights take their toll.”

  “I don’t see it. To me, you look the same.”

  “I think you look about the same, too.”

  “I’ve got more gray hair.”

  “I noticed.”

  “It sucks to be starting to get gray at thirty-five, but whatever, you know? At least it’s staying on my head.”

  She grinned as he took another bite of his sandwich. Then, she asked, “Why are we doing this?”

  “Lunch, or everything?”

  She put down the chip she’d been holding. “You know the answer. Everything. Why are you still here in Bridgeport?”

  “I came here because of the baby.” He refused to call what happened just the miscarriage. That word felt too distant for something that had affected them both so much. “But now? Now I realize that I not only lost a baby but you.”

  “We broke up a long time ago, Seth. Don’t act like you haven’t gone out with other women.”

  “I won’t. I have gone out, but that doesn’t mean any of those other women could fill the gap that you made in my life when you left. It’s still there.”

  “What are you saying? That you want me back?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Seth. Life doesn’t work that way.”

  The tight control that he’d been holding close snapped. “How do you know? What if it does? What if the Lord decided that we weren’t ready back then for each other?”

  She looked stunned. After glancing at the counter where they ordered, she lowered her voice. “Are you thinking that we are ready to get back together now?”

  “I think so.”

  “Even if we were, it still wouldn’t work out.”

  She didn’t realize it, but she’d just given him a grain of hope. “Why wouldn’t it?” he asked softly.

  “Because we live in two separate states. Because you’re down in Lubbock. I’m here. In Ohio.”

  “I’m running my family’s ranch. I can’t move.”

  “Well, I’m running a bar that I own.”

  “Is that what you want to do for the rest of your life? Run a bar?”

  “It’s my job. It’s what I do.”

  “You could always open a bar in Texas. Last time I checked, we drank beer and whiskey there, too.”

  She pushed her plate away. “Seth, thank you for lunch, but I think we need to agree that whatever we used to have is long gone. You need to get out of here and head back.”

  “If I leave now, I’m always going to feel like I didn’t give us a real chance.”

  “But you did. You came to Bridgeport to find me. You did that.”

  “I came to Bridgeport with a thousand questions about why we used to argue so much. With a hundred reasons to be upset with you.” More softly, he added, “I had a dozen excuses about why you owed me because I was so hurt.”

  “And now?”

  “Now I can only think of one reason to stay here. You.”

  She sucked in a breath. “You can’t do this.”

  “I’m afraid I can’t do anything else. I want you back in my life, Genevieve Schuler. Even though it doesn’t make sense and I shouldn’t be so selfish, I absolutely want you to get to know me again. To learn to forgive me for being such a jerk.”

  “And then?”

  “And then, I want you to sell your bar, move back to Lubbock, and realize that we were meant to be together.”

  “Is that all?”

  “No. Then you’re gonna live the rest of your life by my side.”

  She snapped her fingers. “Just like that?”

  “No, not just like that,” he said impatiently. “I know it’s going to be difficult and frightening. I know our future is unsure and there’s a lot of things that we need to get to know about each other.”

  After tossing a couple of bucks on the table, he stood up. “But, I also know that if I don’t ask it will never happen. And if you don’t even think abo
ut it, you’re going to be tending bar by yourself, going to Pilates classes every now and then because you don’t have anything else to do, and always, always living with the regret of never trying harder to hold on to the life we once had.”

  She gaped at him. “Seth …”

  “No, don’t talk. Just listen to me. I don’t know a whole hell of a lot of things, Gen, but I know that.”

  Not trusting himself to say another word to her, he walked to the trash can, threw the wrappings of his sandwich away, tipped his hat to Bree, and walked out the door.

  He had no idea what was going to happen next, but he couldn’t regret what had just happened.

  Not when he’d seen the tears forming in her eyes. She felt something. His words had made that happen.

  For now? That was enough.

  CHAPTER 27

  From Les Larke’s

  You, Too, Can Host

  a Poker Tourney:

  It’s an uncomfortable topic to think about, but every once in a while, a fun, casual game can get out of hand. It’s best to be prepared for that.

  When had Dani laughed so much? It had probably been right around the last time she’d paid someone to watch Jeremy. Years. It had been years.

  That meant it had been way too long.

  “Are you sure you don’t want an ice cream cone?” Jackson asked as they walked along the sidewalks of downtown Bridgeport, stopping to check out various boutiques and pubs. They were really just wasting time. They’d gone out to eat Italian food and now were walking off some of those carbs until it was time to meet their friends over at the Corner Bar.

  “I couldn’t eat another bite. But you can get one if you want.”

  Jackson hesitated in front of the cutest name for an ice cream shop ever, the Daily Scoop. It was in Bridgeport’s old newspaper office and the owners had decorated the walls with framed front pages of the historic paper. “I better not.”

  “Afraid to lose some of your tips?” She was starting to have a really good time teasing him about all the women going to the bar just to look at him. Since he was one of the least flirty men she’d ever met, Dani knew he took the ladies’ interest in stride instead of letting it go to his head.

  “Ha, ha.” He winked. “But maybe.”

  “I deserved that comment, didn’t I?”

  Wrapping his arm around her shoulders, he said, “No. But I now wish I never introduced you to Gen. I could have gone my whole life without you hearing her stories about all the flirty gals.”

  “I’m glad she told me.” Taking a chance, she added, “It just goes to show you that I have good taste.”

  He stopped. “You really think that?”

  She nodded. Realizing how important Jackson had become to her, she said, “I’m glad I found you.”

  He smiled slowly. “Me too, though I think it was more like I found you. I was the one who asked you to babysit Kate.”

  She giggled as they walked on, then stopped in front of another building, an old movie theater. It had stood empty for three years after it closed, and for a while people on the city council had even discussed demolishing it. Only a “Save the Carlyle” campaign had saved the building.

  But even though it had been saved and money had gone into it to fix some of its basic needs, it had sat empty for months.

  Now, however, white lights framed the windows, lights were shimmering inside, and in the windows were old-timey signs where movie posters had once been placed. “Look at this, Jackson! Someone finally moved in here.”

  “Dance with Me Dance Studio. Huh. I guess I better keep this place in mind if Kate ever decides that she wants to take dance lessons.”

  Dani giggled. “Have you met your daughter? Of course she will. She’s destined for ballet slippers.”

  Looking up at the building, his voice softened. “She would look real cute up on stage twirling around, wouldn’t she?”

  “Adorable.” She slipped her fingers in his hand. “But I’m afraid this isn’t that kind of place.”

  “What kind of dance place is it?”

  After giving his hand a squeeze, she said, “I think it’s a grown-up dance place.”

  “For women who want to take ballet?”

  “No, for couples who want to dance like in Dancing with the Stars.”

  “Wow.”

  Lured by the music floating through the door, she said, “Let’s go inside.”

  He didn’t budge. “Dani, I don’t think—”

  “Oh, don’t worry. It’s not like I have money for dance lessons anyway. But can we just look inside? I really am curious about what it looks like. It was empty forever.”

  “You promise you won’t suddenly make me sign up for salsa dancing or something?”

  “I promise,” she said with a smile. Though it was now apparent that he knew a lot more about dancing than he was letting on if he knew what salsa dancing was. “Come on.”

  Looking put-upon, Jackson opened the door and ushered her inside. As soon as the door closed, he let out a low whistle. “This place is awesome.”

  It really was. The walls had been painted a soft dove gray. Ornate trim painted a soft creamy white decorated all the windows and doors. Old-time movie and dance posters lined the hall, each one framed in a black metal frame. Velvet couches and chairs were placed in corners, each upholstered in rich jewel-toned fabric. And that same soothing music floated through each room.

  Dani had never danced in her life and she wanted to slip on a pair of heels and twirl around.

  “Have you seen enough?”

  “Let’s go in just a little further. No one seems to be around.”

  “May I help you?”

  Turning abruptly, they came face-to-face with a dark-haired, slender woman on the tall side. She was easily five foot seven or eight. She was dressed in a form-fitting gray knit dress. It hugged her frame and flowed around her legs. She was wearing a pair of heels and had perfect makeup on. Dani thought she looked just as if she’d stepped out of Dancing with the Stars herself.

  She was also staring at Jackson.

  “Hi,” Dani said with a smile. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but we were just walking by and noticed that someone had moved into the building.”

  An awkward second passed, then Dani noticed that Jackson was staring right back at the woman. “Jackson?”

  “Shannon?” Jackson blurted, still staring.

  Slowly the woman nodded. “Do I … oh my gosh. Jackson Koch?” She swallowed, followed by a hesitant smile. “Jackson, is that really you?”

  He grinned as he stepped over to her and gave her a hug. “Shannon, I can’t believe it. What are you doing in Bridgeport?” After giving her another hug, he dropped his arms and stepped back by Dani’s side.

  “Living here.” She laughed. “Starting a dance studio. What brings you to town?”

  “Kate and I moved here a few months ago.”

  “We’ll have to get together soon.” Looking at Dani, she blushed. “I mean, all of us should. I’m so sorry for my rudeness. I’m Shannon Murphy. I went to high school with Jackson here.”

  Before Dani could say a word, Jackson slipped an arm around her shoulders. “No, this is my fault. Shannon, this is my girlfriend, Dani Brown.”

  While she’d thought it would be scary to hear that word, it felt strangely comforting and warm. Like a good fit. Smiling brightly, Dani held out her hand. “If anyone should apologize, it’s me. I forced Jackson to come inside.”

  “I’m glad you did. Would you like a tour? Do you dance?”

  “Yes to the tour and no to dancing. I … well, I’m afraid I wouldn’t even know how to do the two-step.”

  Shannon smiled. “Luckily, I have a cure for that. I give classes here. Y’all should sign up.”

  “Maybe another time, Shannon. We’re pretty busy right now.
Dani’s son is playing baseball, so it seems just about every night is booked up.”

  “He’s playing like you did,” she said softly. “That’s great.”

  The door opened, and two couples came inside. They looked to be in their forties and the men were wearing jeans and loafers and the women dresses much like Shannon’s and heels.

  Shannon smiled brightly at them. “Good evening. Y’all go right in.” After they moved away, she said softly, “I guess we’ll have to do that tour another time. But um, take my card. My number’s on it. Y’all give me a call if you want to grab a coffee or something.”

  “I’ll do that. Ace, Kurt Holland, and Troy are here in Bridgeport, too. They’d love to see you. We’ll catch up. Winking, he added, “I’m sure they’ll love to hear all what’s been going on with Spartan High’s former head cheerleader.”

  A new shadow entered her eyes. “That was a lifetime ago, wasn’t it? Well, um, I better go. Nice to meet you, Dani. Bye.”

  She turned abruptly away.

  “That was kind of strange, huh?” Jackson asked as he walked to the pile of cards and pocketed one.

  “No, I think it was good. Something happened with that girl. I think she needs a friend. You should call her.”

  Kissing her brow, he murmured, “You really do have the best heart, Dani. I’m lucky to have you.”

  As they walked back out, Dani knew that she felt the same way about him. The exact same way.

  CHAPTER 28

  From Les Larke’s

  You, Too, Can Host

  a Poker Tourney:

  Not every family member is a good addition to your monthly poker game. Remember, anytime you mix gambling, drinking, and a good dose of testosterone, trouble can ensue.

  Gen was out of sorts and Jackson was figuring that he’d had just about enough. From the time they’d opened the doors that afternoon, she’d been snapping orders at him like it was his fault she was in such a bad mood. Kimmy had gotten yelled at for wearing a shirt that Gen had deemed too low-cut. Poor Melissa had gotten reamed for not taking a table’s orders quick enough.