The Little Demons Inside
Page 32
I realize now that I never had a chance. Out-classed, out-matched, and despite my best paternalistic intent, I lost both directly and indirectly. My appeals to you, to turn away from alien promises of living dreams and eternal life, never stood a chance. Who could resist? Who would choose a humble, slow existence of moderate discovery over eating of the fruit from the garden of Eden?
As a ghost without a haunt, I am displaced as well. No more long meals or scratching a deep itch, nor achy bones, nor cool breeze, nor time in front of the television with the immortal grace and humor of the Ellen Show. Ghosts do not get to enjoy life, and I am less deserving of your treasures than I ever was before.
I am here with you now, a thought in the air, a word on the edge of your mind. Perhaps there is still room to influence and guide. I am given to knowledge. Cautious and conservative, slow thought and action. The new normal that I am witnessing is not so different. The organic lifecycle of yours is astoundingly resilient.
Alas, Hakim's blue tinted walls block ingress and egress, not only for those like you, who've made a choice, but for me as well. What I learned in our brief confrontation was that his host, his human matrix, has changed the entity that I knew, perhaps for the better. Were my fears unfounded? I think not, but to let you self-segregate, dual evolution, those inside and those without, is not a terrible idea. What is he planning? What will he make you into? How much choice does he really give those inside?
Without question, you still need my help, but I am smaller than I was. Quieter. Who will listen?